


The Lionhearted

by snugglepup



Category: Homestuck, RWBY
Genre: Alien Culture, Angst and Humor, Body Dysphoria, Canonical Child Abuse, Culture Shock, Fantastic Racism, Friendship, Gen, Identity Issues, Pale Porn, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Species Dysphoria, Speciesism, Team Bonding, Team Dynamics, Team as Family, Teenage Dorks, Terrorism, Weapons, why is everyone adorable or a murderer or both
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-11
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2018-05-13 03:27:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 43
Words: 158,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5692801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snugglepup/pseuds/snugglepup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nepeta, Jade, Kanaya, and Aradia trapped living in the world of Remnant, making the best of the situation and hoping to find a way out. No one is OP, no characters replaced, multiple POVs<br/>(Rated M prematurely for future depictions of graphic violence.)<br/>((blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com))</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Point Of Divergence (1)

__

\-                                -

**\- - vol. 0: anomaly - -**

\-                                -

"Everybody is identical in their secret unspoken belief that way deep down they are different from everyone else."  
― David Foster Wallace,  _Infinite Jest_

_  
_

_that stumble where the syllables combine_

_take depositions from a stranger's face_

_paint every insignificance a sign_

 

[the weakerthans - (manifest)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x384mhNoEWE)

 

* * *

  **R** WBY

* * *

  **30 days prior to Beacon**

 

Thirty days! Just _thirty more days_ until you start at _Beacon_ _Academy_ , for real, in your actual life! And yeah, maybe Cane Guy got away – _somehow –_ but the police can deal with that stuff. _You_ get to deal with being way, way too excited, wandering around Vale in the middle of the night trying to burn off the equivalent of a _massive_ sugar high, which is fine by you. Part of you almost hopes another crazy thing will happen, like maybe you can stop two robberies in one night, or run into some other kind of stereotypical thugs menacing some innocent civilian! Okay, you're technically a civilian too, but _only_ technically as far as you're concerned.

It's crazy how much of the city is well-lit at night, it's nothing like Patch at all. Where there would have been occasional streetlamps with their little pools of light, there are super bright holographic posts everywhere! You'd have to duck into a creepy alley to actually get anywhere properly dark. The only sad part is that it's kind of hard to see the stars, but you like to think that inside the kingdom's walls, the stars just line the streets instead of filling the whole sky.

That's what's still going through your mind – hey, it sounded cool to you once you had the thought, you're going to _cling_ to that – when the last thing you _actually_ expected to happen... well... happens! Or at least, it mostly happens; it's just that rather than a bunch of _faceless_ goons menacing some innocent civilian, you've got some uncomfortably normal looking people doing it. Good thing you were keeping an eye on the alleys, you guess!

"Ummmm, I'm sorry? I don't actually know what that means, I just wanted to ask a few –"

"Oh, _sure_. Weird little mutt creeping around in the dark in _this_ part of town? You getting ready to mug somebody, or what?"

"Yeah, that or rootin' around eating out of the trash. My dog back home does it all the time."

Whoa! Okay, time to maybe break things up here. You really aren't getting a good feeling from these guys, and the girl they're all three ganging up on – who's mugging who here, exactly? – just... she looks so tired and confused and nervous, big puppy ears slanted down and back, which you think probably means the same thing for her type of faunus as it does for Zwei. What kind of dog is she? Is that how it works? You don't actually know. She's definitely not a corgi, though. ...Dad had better be taking good care of him. He needs it without you there to sneak him cookies under the table.

It feels like this is a good time to dramatically clear your throat. This isn't as intimidating coming from you as you wish it was, but you have something else to take care of that angle, plus if things get serious you're still pretty much exploding with energy! Wait, maybe this actually _is_ a sugar rush? You did eat, like, a _bunch_ of cookies pretty recently. Oh, _t_ _hat's_ probably why you have cookies on your mind! That makes sense.

The guys turn around fast, and with a little more light cast on them you notice again that they're just kids like you, sort of, except probably a little older. With the way they move, though, like... wow, talk about wasted motion? Sixteen or seventeen years old is a lot younger than fifteen years old plus combat school! Other than that, though, if you saw them hanging around Signal, you wouldn't bat an eye. Somehow that makes you feel kind of gross and crawly inside. It sucks that jerks don't have to wear badges or uniforms or something, that would make life a lot easier. Maybe the badge could have a big frowny face on it? That's too simple, though, you're gonna have to get a pencil and some paper and brainstorm something later.

"What, you got a problem?" Aww, he thinks he's a _threat!_ Civilians are like angry little crabs, sometimes. They're all snappy and they have claws but somehow they can't tell they fit in the palm of your hand and the worst they can do is pinch you a little. Wait, civilians don't actually have claws. _No, double wait,_ some of them probably _do_ have claws! Ooh, can you tell that stuff just by looking? If you could you think you would've by now, but then again, maybe not. There weren't really very many faunus living in Patch, and you were always busy paying attention to bullets and other not-alive stuff.

With a symphony of clicks and clanks and one sharp thump from puncturing the alley's concrete floor, Crescent Rose answers for you. Everyone freezes. You give them a few seconds to let it sink in, and when the guy in front just takes one slow step back, you chamber a round and let the unmistakable _chh-chhk!_ noise do the rest of the talking. It turns out to be a _really_ short conversation! Maybe you should solve more situations with weaponry. No, that probably only works if you're Uncle Qrow, he _always_ seems to get away with stuff he shouldn't. Would that work if he was there _with_ you, though? Whenever he's around, _you_ start getting away with a little more, too... Once you can't see any of the jerks anymore, you just let the scythe fold back up and slot her comfortably behind your back. The faunus girl is watching you, bright green eyes all wide in the dark.

"Uh... hi! Those guys didn't like, hurt you or anything, did they?" She shakes her head and goes right back to staring, although you sort of feel like she's looking _through_ you and not _at_ you. It's kind of awkward, which is fine! You're pretty used to awkward... buuuut actually the look in her eyes is making it _super_ awkward, so you try to fill the weird silence as fast as possible. "Um... my name's Ruby! How about... you?" Oh man, you are _so_ _terrible_ at this.

"... _what caliber is the gun part_ oh, um! Sorry, I mean... I'm Jade! Nice to meet you."

".50 caliber jacketed with a high-impact propellant ratio and um – I mean..." oh god you are such a nerd, how does this always happen... wait, but didn't she just _ask?_ Nobody does that! Well, a few times at school, sure, but people at Signal never seem to take things seriously enough. You barely have time to process this when she steps in way too close and –

" _And the r_ _ifling?!"_ Holy cow okay personal space would be great right about now but –

"Aaah cold-forged octagonal! I mean I know it's like, more expensive when I can't really fall back on lead-based ammo but I always carry a lot of rounds anyway, and what if I'm out in the field for a long time or, or, you know, plus it just helps with the whole high-impact idea which is kind of important to my whole fighting style –"

"Ugh, _yes_ ," she says, and you feel like an even bigger dork until she finishes the sentence, "and sometimes you don't exactly have a great opportunity to clean out the barrel, let alone deal with basic maintenance! It's one thing if you're broke, nothing you can do there, but with a scope like that I'm thinking sniper rifle so you _really –_ "

"Need to keep things set up for minimum accuracy loss over time, I mean, I'm usually a sort of close range fighter but she's a rifle for a _reason_ and when you're making a really tough shot you can't really afford any more deviation than whatever else you're putting up with, exactly!"

Silence. Oh man, you're tired, too, just _blabbering_ away... And, oh hey, she's so close now you can actually just barely feel her breath reach your face. That's not uncomfortable _at all_ , which is to say that it's incredibly uncomfortable but you're just going to let it slide unless things get even weirder. She doesn't have doggy breath, though! Just regular breath you don't really want to get breathed on by right now. Wait wait wasn't something important going on here?

"Oh jeez I'm sorry I'm a huge weapons nerd, that's really not important right now –"

"Oh jeez I'm sorry I just get super excited about this kind of thing, I guess it's not really relevant –"

If anyone asked, you'd tell them that you and this girl started giggling at the same time, but you're _pretty_ sure the truth is you were ahead by at least a whole quarter of a second. Does that mean you win or lose? _Can_ you win and lose at that? If everybody is laughing together, does that mean you'd all _win by default?_ Oof, your eyes are starting to ache. She can probably see fine, but it's a little bit of a strain for you and you're all tired and stuff anyway.

"So... you want to maybe, _not_ be standing in a dark alley anymore?" Jade – wait, was that her name? You _think_ that was it, you weren't really paying attention – looks around as if she's only just noticed how bizarre this situation is, shrugs, and follows you out onto the street when you clear the way. In the white-blue glow you can finally see her properly and oh wow her outfit is _cute_ , kind of a sparkly hooded black dress dealy ( _somebody_ else appreciates hoods, eat that, _Yang_ ) with a neat white spiral thingy on the front and striped stockings and actually she's kind of dressed super nice? Maybe that's just her thing, but it feels like she's halfway between 'good fashion sense' and 'thinks she's at a party.' Which is fine! It's a thing, is all. You are _so far off track right now_ you're not even sure what the track was in the first place. That saying doesn't even make sense, if a train gets derailed it's pretty much gonna flip out and crash, right, but a _conversation_ can get back on track pretty easy. That saying _is_ about trains, isn't it? You always just assumed it was. What other stuff has tracks no no no wait this is exactly what you were trying to _not_ do.

"So, um..." Well, crap. Now you have no idea what to say. Again. "It kind of seemed like they were picking on you for... y'know..." _Where were you going with this_ there is no non-terrible way to say whatever you're trying to say, "the whole, being a, um. I'm really sorry that... I mean..." _Why_ did you keep going anyway _, a_ _wesome,_ Ruby. Perfect. You can tell just by her face that she's totally baffled by how you even exist.

"It's okay!", she says, and wow, her eyes almost look like they  _glow in the dark_ , no wonder her name is Jade, that's one of the most crazy intense eye colors you've seen. It's like when Yang's get all red, except you think Jade's eyes are in shiny mode 24/7. "I don't really even know what that was all about, to be honest! All I did was try to ask a question. But thank you for helping out! I kind of... don't have my rifle anymore?" She sounds _so sad_ about that, like, _really_ sad. Then again, you don't even want to imagine losing Crescent Rose, maybe it's not so weird. Plus maybe it was special in some other way too? Or not. Maybe. You'll settle on 'maybe.' "I'm sure it would've been okay somehow," _you're_ not sure about that, personally, "but it was definitely nice to meet somebody... nice!" She thinks you're _nice!_ Did you just make a new friend?

"Oh, it was no big deal! I'm just glad I was in the right place at the right time, you know?" You sort of laugh, but it all comes out shaky and embarrassed. "Speaking of that stuff, how come you're out here in the middle of the night? I mean I know why I am but I'm, well, me? I do weird stuff all the time, you know how it is." Ugh, of course she doesn't know how it is, she doesn't even _know_ you.

"About that, actually..." she fidgets, her faunus ears letting a lot more anxiety slip than the fidgeting, you should have stuffed a few cookies in your pocket for later, then you could have given _her_ one because she looks like she could _really_ use a cookie right now, "could you tell me where we are? I'm not really from around here. I guess I'm super lost, to be totally honest!"

"Well, we're not really anywhere in particular, just kind of somewhere in the middle of Vale? I could maybe give directions somewhere if you want!" Wait, yeah, where _are_ you? Maybe it wasn't the best idea to start walking in a random direction for no reason. No, that's _always_ a good idea, look what happened this time! You just should have paid more attention on the way, is all.

She turns her head down a little, sort of staring at the ground, and you almost wish you _didn't_ have a dog you love enough to have learned some stuff about canine body language, because her heritage is still just _screaming_ 'lost and scared' and it's really really sad. She looks like a sad puppy and you just want to give her a hug because puppies aren't allowed to be sad! If you ever accidentally rule the world, you're making that a law. Jade finally looks you in the eye, like she just made up her mind about something.

"If it's not too much trouble, um... could you tell me what Vale actually is?"

... Oh. That raises some questions, honestly!

It must be obvious how shocked you are, because she almost instantly shrugs and smiles in a completely earnest way that makes you feel like a huge jerk even though you didn't really do anything bad, kind of like when Dad guilt trips you, except he does it a little bit on purpose and Jade probably just thinks you think she's crazy. Like, she might be crazy, you're not actually sure? But you're kind of crazy, too, so you wouldn't know, unless that means you _would_ know. It's okay to be crazy, anyway. Yang's _super_ crazy and she makes it work. Do you make it work? You _really_ hope you make it work.

"... Don't worry about it, I'll figure things out! You've helped me out a lot already, anyway." And then she starts to _walk away_ , and you kind of hate yourself just a little bit for not knowing how to react. You start to move to do, well, _something_ , you haven't thought it through, but all of a sudden she stops again on her own, which is good because sometimes when you're not sure what to do but someone feels bad you just instinctively hug them and make everything all weird. "Actually, um, can you think of any places around here where I could sleep? Maybe a park nobody goes to, or... well, whatever works, I'm not picky!" She gives you a big smile, like she didn't just break your heart into a billion pieces, and welp, there you go. It takes you _at most_ half a second to decide what to do.

You really hope Yang won't mind you bringing home a new short-term roommate, because it is _totally_ happening.


	2. Point Of Divergence (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story's current POV character will be denoted by the first letter of their name in bold (example: RWB **Y** would mean Yang is the current POV). There will totally be more than those four POVs, though, it's not just Team RWBY. ANYWAY.

_  
didn't mean to laugh, didn't know i had_

_didn't know the better part of what you said_

_'cause in your head, you are not home_

 

[modest mouse – one chance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZlUwei4bMcA)

 

* * *

RWB **Y**

* * *

  **30 days prior to Beacon**

 

When you stumble out into the living room and see your sister looking _really_ awkward and nervous, standing next to a complete stranger – who's wearing a _hood,_ which means you now owe Ruby twenty more Lien than you did yesterday – you just sort of stand there, hoping this is exactly what it looks like. Definitely not what you expected to wake up to, let alone _when_ you expected to wake up. Good thing you woke up to something real interesting!

"It's three in the morning," you say, "when I _should_ already be asleep, and you brought a girl home with you, and you were trying not to make any noise." Oh _man_ did she ever fail at that, though. 'Quiet' is seriously not one of Ruby's strong suits; you're not sure she actually knows the difference between whispering and stage whispering.

"Ummm... Yes! That's, well, pretty much what's going on?" The other girl hasn't said anything yet, but she looks like she's got it together at least a little bit better than Ruby does, at least. Then again, that's not exactly tough to manage.

"My baby sister's finally growing up," you say, wiping an imaginary tear off your cheek and replacing it with what you hope is a really obnoxious smirk. "I _knew_ I was gonna win that bet with Dad."

The blank looks on their faces tell you that's _not_ the story here, and you sigh and shake your head. You _were_ joking... sort of... but you're kind of disappointed anyway. At least whatever's actually going on is probably still interesting in its own right. How could it _not_ be? And you _still_ think you're gonna win that bet, someday. Dad only put his money on 'guy' because you called dibs on 'girl' before he could open his mouth.

"So! Yang, this is Jade, she's... a person who exists. Jade, this is my sister Yang! She um, she also exists. I think everybody does, actually – mlhpfff?" Ew, she got spit on your hand. Probably should've thought about that before you covered her mouth. It's gross every single time, and that's not gonna change.

"Sloooow down there, sis. I'm way too sleepy for this. What's _actually_ going on here?" This Jade girl is just looking around the place, maybe getting a feel for the layout; it's pretty dark, but the whole faunus thing might mean that's less of an issue for her. Meanwhile, Ruby looks like she's thinking _really_ hard, which you're sure she is. The urge to ruffle her hair is almost overpowering.

"I ran into Jade on the way home from this like, holding cell –" wait, on the way home from _what_ now? "–after I got accepted into Beacon two years early somehow maybe for doing some awesome stuff you haven't heard about –" _wait, after she WHAT?_ "–and uhhh she doesn't actually have anywhere to stay or any Lien so I just kind of brought her homeaAAUGH!?"

Whatever she was saying gets smushed down by the crushing hug you've trapped her in. A minute and a some squirming later, and she finally breaks loose.

"Gimme one second to process that."

It takes you more than one second. It does only take you about five seconds to realize that as much as your brain is shrieking a million questions and something along the lines of 'ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod' and you're suddenly not sure you _are_ awake after all... That stuff can wait until morning. The whole... possibly homeless girl in your living room? Yeah, that has to get resolved as soon as possible, mostly so you can go pass out again.

"Okay, I'm gonna process that _tomorrow_ , I think. So..." You finally decide to give what's-her-name some attention. Jeez, her dress really makes her blend in with the shadows. Her eyes are also crazy bright – even in the dark, when stray bits of light hit them, it's like, whoa. There's green and then there's _green_ , you know?

"Juhh... wait, sorry. Jade, right?" She nods and gives a little wave with one hand. "She said you don't have anywhere to stay?"

"Nope. I'm not really... from around here?" Jade shrugs and smiles. "I was just going to try to sleep on a park bench or something! It's fine if you're not okay with me staying over, I mean, I guess I'm basically a total stranger. And, um." She shrinks into herself, just a little. "Some people seem to have an issue with these?"

Her ears wiggle back and forth. Oh. Right. Wait, and Ruby apparently found her wandering around in the middle of the night... she's unarmed and maybe a civilian... it may or may not be accurate, but the mental image you have right now isn't exactly great.

"That's not as much of a _thing_ where I came from, but I know other cultures are sort of –"

"Lemme go clear off the couch," you say, and the gratitude on her face is seriously a little bit... scary. Most of Vale is so _clean_ on the surface, but with the kind of fun you get up to, you know how nasty things can be when no one's looking or when somebody's just choosing to look the other way.

There's something bigger going on for sure – like, what was that about _'where I came from'_ and _'other cultures'_ , exactly? – but it's none of your business, especially when it's hard to keep your eyes open. The couch isn't too bad, so you just lift up the back end and shake it a few times until stuff quits falling off or falling out.

"Thank you so much," she says, and then sort of trails off, like she's remembering her actual situation – whatever that is – and only realizing now how big of a deal this is for her. Yeah, she's halfway in her own little world, not that there's anything wrong with that.

"Thank her," you mumble, nodding towards your sister, "aaaand now I'm going to my room to stop being awake." Halfway through the doorway, you look back over your shoulder. "Don't, like..." A long sigh. "Just, if you see Ruby in the kitchen before seven, make sure she's not sleepwalking and leaving spare clips in the fridge? That would be _awesome_."

Closing the door, you flop onto your bed like a rag doll. About a thousand things just happened, and all you want now is for the rest of the night to be dreams with nobody else in them.

 

* * *

 

 _"And the winner of this century's Extreme Punching Championship is... YANG XIAO LONG!" The crowd is going completely nuts, and you don't blame them. It's been a long, crazy road, but the world has finally recognized you as the greatest puncher in the universe. Guys are crazy for you, girls want to be you, a few girls are also crazy for you..._ Thunk. Thunk. Thunk.

What is that _knocking_ sound?

All of a sudden, the world around you is... _fading_ _out_ , almost, becoming a thin backdrop that's blatantly fake, but you're sure you're still asleep. Is this, like, lucid dreaming or whatever? That's new. And weird. And there's a door in the middle of a stadium, just kind of standing there, and someone is knocking on the other side. Somehow. Well, that's sure a thing. Might as well open it!

 _"_ _Whoa!"_ You take a step back from the wide, almost creepily enthusiastic eyes that are about an inch away from your face. "Um. Hi." The door opens up to a dizzying expanse of pure _nothing_ , darker than black forever into the distance, apart from what look like weird spheres or bubbles in a lot of different colors and sizes, scattered randomly through the void.

"Sorry to interrupt! Can I ask you a few questions? The last couple dreams I tried to visit belonged to some _really_ rude people." A really cute, sort of round-cheeked girl, slightly slanted rust-red eyes that are a lot darker than yours in that state, a bright red outfit that's cool but a little too complicated to take in all at once, surprisingly big curly ram horns, and a grin so wide it ought to be splitting her face in half.

"Uh... huh." Well, this is new. _Real_ new. This dream is getting weird and exciting really fast! And it's just a dream, so... "Sure, why not? Come on in."

You thought that grin couldn't possibly get any wider, but you were wrong.

 _So_ wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since it's unclear exactly where they were at what points in the timeline, I'm just sort of giving Ruby and Yang a vague temporary apartment in Vale for the month in between the start of this fic and the start of Beacon's first semester. It probably has something to do with Yang and/or school, I don't know. Honestly, that detail doesn't really matter; they just need a place to fall back on early in the story, and I'm not going to write Taiyang until we've seen him in the show as more than a cardboard cut-out, so yeah. Hope that's not too obnoxious of a handwave.


	3. Point Of Divergence (3)

_you're looking for allies_

_looking for satellites across the great divide_

_moving in circles, turning to someone else_

_with nothing left to hide_

 

[longwave - satellites](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiJMqxEM_EI)

 

* * *

 **R** WBY

* * *

   **30 days prior to Beacon**

 

"Soooo, do you just want to sleep, or..." You're trying _super_ hard to keep your voice down. Not that it's hard, more like... well, easy to forget? Short-term memory is a Huntress's second worst enemy. What's the third worst, though? Grimm, forgetting stuff, uh, maybe boredom? Boredom is pretty terrible, and it could probably kill you if it tried hard enough.

"Maybe in a little while? I was kind of hoping we could talk. There's a whole lot going on right now that's totally new to me, and I guess I sort of..." She stares at the floor for a second. There _is_ a lot of stuff all over there now, although it's still really dark and you can't make any of it out. "I guess I just want to have some idea of what's going on before I try to sleep!"

"That makes sense! Fire away."

"Well, when we were walking over here, you said this is Vale? The kingdom of Vale? So, there's a king somewhere, but how _big_ is this place?"

"What? No, there's no... there isn't a _king._ " Wait a minute. There _isn't_ , is there? What the heck? How did you make it to fifteen without really thinking about that? Well, you did it by pouring everything you had into one specific goal and shutting out almost everything else, but still. Did Vale have a king once, like maybe a long time ago? You're awful at history, but it feels like that's still something you should be able to answer! "It's complicated! And... Big? I mean, it's one of four kingdoms, so, there aren't really any other places that come close... I guess you grew up on the outside, then?"

"Um!" She fidgets a lot, you're noticing, which makes you feel a little better about how much of a spaz you are – not a _lot_ better, because she is nowhere near as bad about it, but some – and she also takes an awfully long time to say some things, but not others. "You could say that. My home was a long, long way away from... well, kind of everywhere."

Whoa. But nobody lives so far from the kingdoms that they could just _not know they even existed_. You'd have to be deeper in Grimm territory than anybody's _ever_ made it before. Or at least, deeper than anybody _knew_ anybody had made it. Is there a village that far out, somehow? No, that's not possible, it would have to be, like, a whole _secret kingdom!_ Oh my god, is that real? Nothing else would make sense at all. Does that mean there could be _more_ places like that? Pockets of life with so much doomed landscape in between that the rest of the world forgot them, and they forgot the kingdoms?

You guess maybe that's possible. When it comes down to it, who really knows _what's_ out there? Nobody does! _Nobody!_ Past a certain point it just isn't possible to keep pushing, and not even the whole Atlesian fleet could do it from the skies, they'd just get cut down by swarms of Nevermores and who knows what else... something still makes you nervous about the way Huntsmen and Huntresses don't like to talk about the details of the Grimm way out, even to kids in training to go _fight_ them. And you have a friend of a friend's anecdotal account that they don't even talk about all of it at _Beacon_ , or if they do it must be restricted to freshman students, even _sophomores_. _Sophomores_ don't even know! You'd think by then they would know _everything_ about _everything_ and oh wait she's talking again. Maybe she's _been_ talking. Whoops.

"... Well, I'm used to ending up in lots of difference places, so it's not all that bad, I just wish I could figure out if any of my friends are in this – a-are still around, somewhere... None of us really have a place to go home to, so I'm sure they'd be wandering all over getting into trouble!"

"Are they... fighters? Huntresses?" Oh man, some people's lives just _suck._ Hopefully whoever they are, her friends _do_ know how to fight, but... out there? If it's a tenth as bad as you're thinking, it really might not make a difference in the end.

Sometimes, somebody can be an amazing fighter and an amazing person, practically invincible, and you wake up one morning and somehow they're just...

Gone.

"Hehe, I don't know about _Huntresses,_ but we could all take care of ourselves. I mean, I was the, um. I guess the least experienced, at least when it came to fighting monsters, but I grew up hunting! My grandpa had a saying – well he had a whole lot of them, but, this one thing he wrote... 'If you don't know your gun well enough to sleep with your finger on the trigger, then you're not ready to hunt with it," and you _snrk_ a little at the silly deep voice she tried to do, "and now I'm pretty good with pretty much anything like a rifle." Jade is _way_ off in her own head, now. If anybody knows what that looks like, it's you!

"He sounds like a cool grandpa! Then, was he your teacher?"

"Uh." She tries to laugh, but it doesn't seem like it's working right. "Kind of, in a way. He kept a lot of journals, and I'd find them growing up, and there was a lot of good stuff in there! Most of it was sort of weird rambling, but sometimes it was weird rambling about marksmanship and stuff, and I think he knew some tricks a lot of people didn't."

"What do you mean... journals? Was he not really around much? My uncle's kind of the same way."

"Oh, no, he wouldn't just leave me alone like that! He just... well, he died when I was four, but I always felt like he was still trying to raise me, you know? I always had his journals, and..." no no noooo who said it was okay for that to be real, "I don't know. Reading them always just sort of gave me hope!"

no seriously who said that was okay

"... sorry, did you say something?" Bluh. You shake your head a little too hard, ow. Save that for the loud music, Ruby.

"No no, sorry, I think I was just talking to myself. I guess I am pretty tired." Yeah, maybe those cookies are starting to wear off... Actually, things are kinda getting wobbly and heavy. Just about time to burn out! "So... wait, if your grandpa didn't technically raise you, um. You haven't said anything about your parents, and you must have grown up with them, right?"

"Oh, no," actually sounding surprised, like that idea _hadn't even crossed her mind before_ , "I don't really have parents! It was just me and Bec on my island after grandpa died. Until I was thirteen, and... hehe, a whole lot of stuff changed, really." _Oh_ finally a name though, thank god, you're terrible at these situations when even the other person _herself_ doesn't seem to know if she wants to talk about whatever.

"Who's Bec? I mean... were you adopted, sort of? Sorry, I'm having trouble following all this, I'm getting kind of tired! You know how it is, you sorta start having trouble putting stuff together, and like, I don't really know what to ask or what's _okay_ to ask, and I'm really sorry about your grandpa and I'm sorry I'll just shut up now if you want."

"It's fine! Hey, don't be all sad. I'm not sad about any of it!" Man, when you don't have a weapon to build or techniques to practice over and over and over, you're really bad at keeping people from noticing if you're feeling bad... There must be a way to get better at it, though! You just need... hmm. Gotta remember that for later, it's not going to get solved tonight no matter what happens.

"Oh right, you were asking about Bec! He was my guardian. And, also my dog!" Wait, isn't... isn't _she_ a dog? Not literally, well, only part-literally, just like, is that not weird? You feel like if _you_ were a faunus it would be _super_ weird to have a pet that was the 'same species.' But then... you're not, so it's not really something you should try to... augh, you're not even sure how to phrase this in your own head, it's just not something you have any way of understanding. Maybe it won't be like that for some stuff eventually, when you know more, but right now you're just feeling stupid because _shouldn't_ you at least... get more about it all than you do? Even a little more?

"... you just grew up alone on an island with your dog? For like, ten years?"

"Not _ten years._ I think it was more like nine!"

It's kind of quiet for a little while, after that. Jade covers her mouth and yawns, and you have absolutely no yawn immune system, so you do too.

"I'm pretty worn out, I think," Jade says. "Thank you again for lending me your couch! I know I said that already, but... Well, things are real weird right now! I don't really have any of my stuff, and a lot of things I..." you are way too tired to analyze any more conversation like, at all, "sorry, it's hard to explain. Right now, it just feels like... kind of like there's so much more I used to be capable of, but somehow I can't remember how I did it. I don't know if that makes any sense, but, um. So, I really, really appreciate this! You guys are awesome."

"N-nah, it was just the obvious thing to do?" and there's another yawn. yeah, she's right, sleep is the best and you should go get it before, like, the sun comes up. well, no okay that's still a couple hours away, but it's getting _close._ "I'm gonna go to bed! There's food and stuff and if you want anything go for it, there's a blanket over there 'cause sometimes I fall asleep watching TV, and tomorrow I'll try to actually answer stuff and it's getting hard to do sentences so see you in the morning!"

once you're in bed with the door shut, you stare at the ceiling for a while, longer than you thought you would. longer than you _should_ , probably, but eventually you turn over onto your side and pull the covers up close. it's a waste of time to just lie here depressed, the important things are beacon... beacon, beacon, holy crap, _beacon..._ and a girl who _doesn't_ have to spend the night sleeping on a park bench, now. there's no point being all down and stuff. in the morning you'll take a shower, eat something, flip out with yang, and it'll be awesome.

"things will be better tomorrow," you mumble, 'cause it seems like old habits really do stick around, and then you wait just a little bit longer for today to end.

 

* * *

RWBY

?  **J**? A

* * *

 

From the bottom of the echeladder and into the clouds above the whole thing, just about at the top of the world... but when there are no god tiers to stand on in the first place, they don't seem like they mean very much of anything at all!

_Expand_

_Orbit_

_Contract_

The candy wrapper in your hand is silent in response. You used to speak the same language; you could wave a planet away with a single thought, but planets don't listen to words, and you don't remember how to say the things they can understand. Sigh. Just... put it down and get some rest.

There _is_ one last thing to try again, though.

You reach out to the open air to call up your sylladex, but the space isn't just 'open' like it should be, no, it's still uncomfortably _empty._ It's not that you actually thought it would just be back to normal all of a sudden, but every time it _isn't_ back to normal, there's some of this same chill, this same spike of weird crawly mental vertigo.

But that's... that's alright. It _has_ to be, until there's another option, some kind of way out. So what if you can't even glance at your stats anymore? You're still stronger and faster than you were at the bottom of the echeladder all those years ago, just not in exactly the same ways; like you've been _converted_ from one system so you can fit into another. You're still _worth_ something.

At least you're not alone, even if you never – even if it takes a long time to make things normal again. There are nice people here! You've met _two_ of them already, _in person_. And all you had to do was... well, you didn't have to do anything, really! Isn't that a good sign? It's only been one night, you won't get anything done when you're exhausted and frustrated, and there's going to be more than enough time to figure all of this out later.

Yeah. You just need to hang in there.

Things will be better tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear next chapter won't be depressing. I doubt I could make Yang and Aradia's first meeting depressing even if I tried, and I won't be trying.


	4. Lucid Greetings (1)

_show me the ways, give me the means_

_to pull away the veil of time_

_to find the path from which we strayed_

_to destinations far and wide_

 

[vnv nation – teleconnect 1](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3YSARMqMzI)

 

* * *

RWB **Y** / ?J?A

* * *

  **30 days prior to Beacon**

 

She looks around the weird, paper-thin expanse of your dream with an unsettling amount of interest. Just a still frame where only three things seem real: yourself, the ram-horned girl, and that door.

"So are you dead, or are you asleep?" Oh god she's one of those people who always gets right up in your face when she talks to you, isn't she. Time to steel your nerves, because you're pretty sure she's going to startle you at least once every fifteen seconds.

Also, wait, what? _That's_ not a creepy thing to say to someone or anything.

"I'm dead tired," you say, and the next thing you know she's got her arm out for a fist-bump. _Nice._ "Last time I checked, I was pretty alive." The enormous grin seriously makes you feel like her mouth should be full of fangs and/or shark teeth, but it's not, and somehow that's worse. "So are you part of the weirdest dream ever or are you... an actual person?"

"Extreme Punching Champion? I know some people you would _really_ get along with." She's wandering around now, poking at the frozen shadow-people filling out the stands and the ranks of defeated enemies. "I like the silhouette thing. So the only people who are real to you are the ones you like, huh? The ones who interest you."

You think you were about to chamber something witty to say, but it's blown right out of your head. What does _that_ mean? She's making you sound like some kind of sociopath. Man, whatever. _You_ know how you look at the world, whatever this... uh... whatever this person/dream thing has to say about it.

"Aradia Megido!" GOD THERE SHE IS AGAIN, WHY, HOW DOES SHE DO THAT.

"... Gesundheit?"

"I know _your_ name from the banners and trophies everywhere. Aradia Megido, at your service!" Oh, okay. That's... weird, but not _that_ weird. Once you wrap your head around the way the syllables flow, it's actually pretty cool. This is also when you notice that she's glowing faintly, a rusty red light that must be aura, and anything it touches recovers a little of its color, feels a bit less fake.

"Uh, yeah, sure. You know, you still haven't told me if you're real or not."

"Oh, I'm entirely real! And before you ask if I'm a ghost or anything, nope! I am very much alive. I've done the ghost thing, and noooo thanks, I like this a _lot_ more." The red glow, the door... Something clicks that _could_ help this make sense. _Maybe._ Something like this would be incredibly rare, though, if it's actually possible.

"... Is this your _semblance?_ Dream stuff?"

She beams so hard you don't even know what the word means anymore. Your logic is telling you to take a step back, so you refuse to do _that_.

"Apparently~! I _have_ met a few other chatty dreamers, so I know what _that_ means. Anyway, I've been going around trying to gather information, and I was hoping you could help out!"

"Yeah, that's what you were saying at the door. Fire away."

"First of all... Where's your body? Where do you live?"

"Y'know, that's kind of _personal?"_ Siiiigh. Sure, why not. "Vale, but that's as specific as I'm getting." For now. Who knows about the future? She steeples her fingers and rests her chin on them, leans even closer, narrows her eyes with interest.

"Second question! Have you seen anyone around who's kind of... hmm! Out of place? Doesn't know things they _should_ know, even common knowledge, maybe? Has anybody hit on you recently in a way you think makes absolutely no sense?"

Okay, okay. That's more than one question. And no, you haven't, have you? Ara... Aradia? Is that it? Aradia is by far the weirdest person you've met in a long time, if she's actually real. Nothing else out of the ordinary is... huh.

"My sister did just let a homeless faunus girl we don't know stay over, but I don't remember much, I was half-asleep already. I guess she was _kind of_ weird."

"Innnnteresting ~ I'll have to ask some more questions about that tomorrow night, then..."

 _"Tomorrow_ night? Are you dream-stalking me or something?

"Oh, don't be silly! You don't _have_ to let me in. I can't come in the door unless you let me, and I have to ask every time. If you want to be boring, that is totally your prerogative!"

... She has to ask, then? That's _less_ terrifying than it could be, at least. What a bizarre semblance – if she's real, which you ought to just dismiss as a possibility, but then again, stranger things _have_ happened. Probably. And then suddenly she's staring at you even more intensely, and all of the humor and cheerfulness is just _gone_ , and what's left freaks you right out. You can't tell if you're looking at a devil or a really weirdly dressed angel, or which is better or worse.

"Third question." Her gaze is like a drill boring right through your eyes, shredding any chance of hiding – hiding what – oh boy – _"Do you know what a sylladex is?"_

"No? I'm pretty sure I've never heard that word before in my life."

And as if somebody snapped their fingers and brought her out of a trance, the grin is back, but... there's something just a little bit sad to it, now. If somebody asked you to explain how you could even tell, you wouldn't be able to, but there it is.

"Okay! You'll probably never hear it again, don't bother looking into it." She starts to pace around the stadium, talking to herself. "So it's mostly Vale dreams in this direction, Atlas is all the way over _there_ , Vacuo is right where I start out... so it has something to do with the current location in physical space, too, that's good to know... which other bubbles looked promising, they might know more... oh!" Aradia whirls around to face you again and you're glad she walked away, because otherwise you think she would have horned you in the face. "I keep seeing people with _really neat_ transforming weapons and stuff. How legal is that? If I went and tried to make something awesome, could I keep it on me without any dumb human laws getting in the way?"

Dumb _human_ laws? That kind of implies she's used to a whole different set. Is she... could she be White Fang? They probably have their own weird terrorist rules, and they definitely aren't _human_ ones... She doesn't seem like that, though. You could picture her violent, that's not hard to imagine, but she seems too _whimsical_ to be a terrorist. Just gonna let that idea slide for now.

"... You should probably get a license? In Vale, there are some places you can demonstrate your skill with hands-on testing to get licensed even without combat school training, so it's probably the same wherever you are." _If you're real_ , you don't say.

"Oh good! That's easy. Ooh, and if the balance was just right... yeah, I think that'd take off a head pretty easily..."

You really, _really_ hope she's talking about Grimm heads, and you really, _really_ don't like that you aren't actually sure.

"... can't rely on _that_ for ranged combat anymore, so maybe..."

She keeps talking to herself and you sort of just watch. Huh. Reminds you of Ruby, but at a way less frantic pace. Hey, is that – oh come on, really? _Another_ hood enthusiast? How'd you miss that earlier? You _can't_ tell Ruby about this, _at all._ She might try to get another twenty Lien out of you for being 'double-right' or something. It wouldn't be the first time. Or the fifth.

"So, is it my turn to ask questions now? Because I have a _lot_ of questions."

"Oh! Of course! I can't promise I'll answer or tell the truth, but ask me whatever you want!"

"Alright, well, maybe you could tell me wh –"

"Wait, wait, sorry! I'm running low on time." She pauses for a second to giggle at something, who knows what. "I'll be waking up pretty soon and there's still a bubble I wanted to poke at tonight, so ~ how about you ask me tomorrow night?"

So what she's really asking is 'mind if I show up again tomorrow night,' then. Let's see. Creepy mystery girl who's either part of the weirdest dream in your life or has a totally crazy semblance, half the things she says are really ominous, she's cheery in a way that makes you wonder if she's a murderer...

"You'd better show up, or I'm gonna be really bored," you say.

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about _boredom_ ~!"

And just like that, she skips back through the door, and when she closes it, there's no trace that it ever existed. You walk over to one of the shadow people and poke it. It falls over like a cardboard cutout. If this is life as it is _now_ , how much more fun is _Beacon_ going to be?

Your own grin doesn't exactly split your face in half, but it's sure getting wider by the second.

 

* * *

RWBY / ?J?A

~{  **O** }~

* * *

 

Perhaps you don't have the chance to sleep as often or as long as you might prefer, but you do find what rest you can manage to be quite pleasant, these days. The subconscious is a peculiar thing, and your mind understands the gravity of the threats facing this world well enough that such intrusive things as 'nightmares' are no longer necessary. You certainly have no complaints.

However, the knock at your office door has you somewhat... concerned. Generally, nothing in a dream carries the same sense of _resonance_ as that sound. On the other side, a ram-horned girl is smiling a bit intensely, framed against a strange void unlike anything you've seen before. Fascinating.

"Excuse me!", she asks, and, regardless of the oddity, it's always nice to see a smiling youth, "but would you mind if I asked you a few questions?"

Hmm. More intriguing by the second.

"Perhaps, unless I am correct in my suspicion that this would require allowing your entry into my mind. Is that the case?"

"Well ~ yeah, pretty much. Is that okay?"

"... I'm afraid I'll have to decline at the moment. If it is not too rude, might I ask if this is the result of a semblance?"

"Yup! Some people seem like they name theirs, so I'm calling it _'Visitation.'_ It just has a good ring to it, I guess!"

"I've no argument there. Well, feel free to ask whatever you'd like, supposing we happen to meet again in the waking world."

"Sure thing. Have a nice night!"

Like that, she's gone, and opening your office door again leads only to the actual exterior of your dreams. You avert your eyes, if only for the sake of keeping your thoughts focused on less... _horrific_ things, shut and lock the door, and return to your desk, taking a sip of an imaginary coffee.

"How rare to find such a polite young lady these days," you muse. Perhaps you _will_ cross paths elsewhere. It is rather difficult to be sure. Either way, you hope that you've met an unexpected and intriguing ally and not a new, unforeseen foe.

True, you cannot be certain, but you will be very surprised indeed if you do _not_ see that girl again, and more surprised still if what just happened was not a very, _very_ important thing to remember.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aradia is the only one who will have a semblance for quite a while. I mean, Jade doesn't even know about AURA yet, so...


	5. Inverse Philosophy (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things have been busy lately, so apologies for the delay. This is a short chapter, but I thought it would be better to post it as it stands now rather than try to incorporate it into a larger one; it'll work out regardless, and this way there's something to read much sooner.
> 
> You might notice this chapter has a different title, despite the prior being Lucid Greetings (1). This is a cut-away to semi-parallel events, and sometimes small 'arcs' may overlap like this and alternate back and forth. For example: Lucid Greetings (1), Inverse Philosophy (1), Lucid Greetings (2), and so on. Basically, if a chapter has its title followed by (1), the arc will be longer than one chapter.
> 
> Now, on with the weirdness!

_save me, i'm not crazy_

_i just fell through the ground_

_and now things are upside-down_

 

[eisley – wicked child](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAEmHcc4LvA)

 

* * *

RW **B** Y

NJ?A

* * *

**33 days prior to Beacon**

 

It's a stupid, stupid choice, and you know it even as you're acting it out. Coming here won't bring back anything that you've lost or thrown away, if there's even a difference between the two. At best, you'll revisit everything you want to forget, and at worst...

At worst, some of you -  _no_ some of _them -_ at worst some of _them_ are still here, and that means that _he_ might still be here, even after all this time. If he found you... would he let you go again? Did he let you go in the first place because he was just shocked and hurt, betrayed? He could have made that jump like it was nothing, and he didn't, but that was then and this is now, and you honestly can't say if that man would _allow_ you to leave again. You don't think he'd kill you. Not _you_.

No, but would he _keep_ you, trapped and talked into penitence? If he did, how long would it be before you started to believe in him again?... And despite all of that, you find yourself here, wandering aimlessly through drifting crimson leaves in this timeless wood where the world is always dying but never quite dead.

The sound of roaring in the distance brings you out of your awful trance. Flitting from tree to tree, keeping to shadows, you follow the sound because some part of you _has_ to, has no choice but to look and discover who the Grimm of Forever Fall are hunting now.

When you see a Faunus girl backed up against a tree – mask? no, none, she might not be one of them – by a particularly large and spiky Beowolf raising a foot-long paw for a killing blow, it's not exactly difficult to decide on a course of action. You unsling the ribbon from your arm, and before your own body is even halfway there, the thing is twitching and steaming on the ground with a severed spinal cord. The girl is clearly surprised, but she doesn't seem afraid at all.

Skidding to a halt a few feet away, your breath catches for a second. Cuts, bruises, lacerations all over, and not a speck of aura, not even the small hint of it that most civilians have managed to unlock... and when you glance around quickly to make sure the area is empty of hostiles, you understand what happened. It looks as though there was a battle in a clearing just off to the side, and with no indication of any other fighters, the dozens of Beowolves slowly evaporating must have been killed by...

That _would_ explain why she's devoid of aura, but as far as you can tell, she isn't even _armed_.

She smiles, or maybe she grins, or maybe something that's some of both and something else too, and that's when you see the long, sizzling Grimm-bone claws that she's haphazardly tied to her wrists, just peeking out from under too-long tattered sleeves. How do you even _process_ that? Improvised weapons are one thing, but this is a whole new level.

"These things are sort of fun to hunt, but..." What is going on with her cutesy voice?It sounds like she's made of melted candy. Her green tail is held high and flat, and her pupils are still slightly dilated with excitement– was she not scared at all? ... Does she _dye the fur to match her eyes?_ Maybe it's natural, though. Stranger things have happened.

"... they don't bleed at all! It's pawfully boring killing things that don't even _bleed_ , you know?" This, in a tone so casual and _peppy_ that it's almost hard to believe what she's _saying_ with it... wait. Really, wait for one second. Did she just say _'pawfully'?_ No, that had to be your imagination, no one talks like that. Not the important factor here. The fact that she looks like she just went through a meat grinder should definitely take priority.

"We need to get out of here. You're going to be easy prey with your aura exhausted like that. I'm amazed you're still standing, honestly –"

**D I E  D I E  D I E  D I E  D I E  D I E  D I E  D I E  D I E  D I E  D I E  D I E**

You leap back in shock, tightening your grip on both components of Gambol Shroud, but it doesn't matter: this is where you die. The glint that's just appeared in her eyes is screaming out your **death**. You're going to die, alone and forgotten, die here and now, because –

"There's no need to be _rude_ ," she huffs, and it's like a harsh wind suddenly slowed to a halt. You remember through the dizzy haze of fear that you're _not going to die_. You're _not_ , but you're still shaking all over, heart pounding with the shock and aftermath of this unbearable _terror_. "You're craysea if you think I'm _anything's_ purrey."

Now you get it. It's the first time you've ever been on the receiving end, and now that you have, you think... you think you were more right to abandon the White Fang than you realized, because this was one thing only: _intent to kill,_ sharpened to the point that it's almost a weapon on its own, and the only person you've ever seen who could do that...

Well, better you ran into this girl than _him._ But who goes from _zero to murder to zero again_ in the span of a few seconds? Who's _capable_ of that?

"Oh yeah!", she says, cocking her head to the side curiously, "Mew said something else weird, too." Huh? _You_ said something weird? How can she act like _you're_ the strange one in this situation?

"What was it?" You know you could take her. She has no defenses at all. You can knock her out in one blow if you have to. All of that's _obvious,_ but you're still shaking, just a little bit. Still _anxious._

"You said I was easy prey beclaws 'my aura was gone,' I think?"

"Yes, I did," still moving slowly and warily, though you've begun to relax your guard bit by bit.

She pauses to spit blood off into the grass. Even if she's roughed up, though, it's obviously not from internal bleeding; she probably took a hit to the face and cut the inside of her mouth or bit her tongue. It's still disconcerting to watch, especially given the circumstances.

... And when she opens her mouth again, you give up all hope that this could make any sense at all.

"Shore, but could you tell me what this aura stuff actually _is?_ "


	6. Let Tensions Evolve (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At last, I recover from canon enough to get back to fic. What a ride.

_  
it came across like you were mad_

_holding in your breath with everything you had_

_until your face began to turn red_

_"this is why i turn and walk away from everything"_

_i need to feel it closer now_

 

[circa survive – travel hymn](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhkEBfFxH5w)

 

* * *

RWBY

NJ **K** A

* * *

**37 days prior to Beacon**

 

Everything is fine. Everything is going to _be_ fine. You've handled far worse than this, survived much worse. The world you knew was gone long even before you found yourself here. Yes, you can deal with that, as jarring as it might be. That's not really even the problem.

The real problem is completely new to you, and it's the reason you're trying to be as quiet as possible while you retch into a human load gaper in some sort of horrifying public communal ablution block. It's okay. There might be a way back. No, there _must_ be a way back to what you are.

Are all humans sensitive in this way, or is it just _your_ hideously twisted body? Or... not _human_ _s_ , perhaps; it's difficult to be sure, but you already knew that humans don't have fangs like these – no substitute for those that truly belong to you, weaker, only a few as long as they ought to be, but perhaps you should try to 'count your blessings.' For one thing, you think that you've nearly exhausted your body's current supply of what you assume is digestive fluid, so you can't choke on anything other than your own emotions.

Count your blessings. Right. You still have some semblance of fangs. Some of your senses might actually be sharper, unless that's a side effect of your current mental state; sight, sound, touch. One special sense seems to remain, albeit in a different form. _Blood._ Beneath their flesh, beneath _yours_ , it pulses and flows, glowing hot and red in the most vulnerable places.

It would appear that _this_ aspect of your nature will not be changed by anything, which is at least some small, weird comfort.

But it's all wrong. Too much is wrong, too much is different, too much has fundamentally changed, and you hook your fingers as if to slash at someone with your claws. Claws that you no longer have, fingers that don't feel natural in the position at all.

You force yourself to swallow through what threatens to be another bout of painful dry heaves, and the hand you raise to your mouth is brown and too soft and jointed just slightly wrong. Humans vary in skin color, you knew that, and as deeply strange as you found it, it didn't really bother you in the end. It turns out that the matter is quite different when it's _your_ skin that isn't the gray you expect.

And yet it is still easier to accept than the absence of your – than... Than the absence of your _horns_.

Seizing up again, you wrap one arm around your aching bonecage as it spikes semi-rhythmically with pain, and the raw inside of your throat flares as it fails to raise anything else from your digestive sac.

It isn't just the h – the h, the horns, but you can't think about any of _that_. About the _rest_. Maybe later, if you've adjusted even a little. Maybe later, maybe _never._

Away from that nightmarish subject and back to another, there are fuzzy aerial gore-drinker ears near where your horns once were, and somehow it upsets you that you can _instinctively_ make sense of and process four sources of audio input. What else has changed inside your mind that you haven't noticed?

. . .

Minutes pass. Your breathing has steadied, your thoughts can move without racing at that terrible speed. The stink of your own breath is nauseating, but there's nothing left to throw up and you've at least wiped your mouth clean.

You can't stay in this strange little isolated sub-chamber forever. You'll need to find some way to survive here in this city suffocated by snow, where few other passers-by seem to share your horrible state of being not merely _mammalian_ but bestowed with the features of both humans _and_ other species. Dark looks have followed you through every street as you stumbled your way to _anywhere_ private; it appears that you are now more or less the social equivalent of a rustblood.

The shaking in your hands and legs is mostly gone. Yes. Yes, it's time to move on, at least for now. You unlock the strange door just as a trail of footsteps enters through the primary door and open it once they've come to a stop across the room.

There's a girl standing in front of a mirror, hair like the snow that chokes everything, skin pale enough that the fire in her veins is shocking in its vermilion shine. A quiet sniffle. She murmurs something at the very edge of hearing, so quietly that you can't understand the words.

When she turns, her eyes grow wide and then narrow deeply at the sight of you, light ice blue with bloodshot sclera.

"I wasn't aware this restroom catered to _animals_ ," she says, craning her head up to acknowledge your presence, which she apparently finds to be odious. _Well_ then.

"Nor was I aware it catered to petty little girls. Are you sure you're old enough to be here?" She huffs, indignancy turning to something much deeper as she seems to fully notice the contrast between her tiny frame and your height.

"Am I _old enough_ – how – _you –_ ", and when she sees the smirk that's spread across your face, she manages to compose herself in her rapidly accelerating rage. "Well. I suppose it should come as no surprise to me that your filth can't even discern something as simple as _age_. Do you have the _slightest_ clue who you're talking to?"

"An inferior, to be sure, but other than that you'll have to enlighten me. I don't make a habit of memorizing the face of every child who happens to cross my path."

 _God_ , but does that feel good. You couldn't have asked for an easier outlet for your frustration.

"I am _Weiss Schnee_ , not a _child_ , and _certainly_ not inferior to something that isn't even _human_." 'Weiss', you notice, is slowly edging her left hand toward the odd rapier at her hip. "Shouldn't you be busy worshipping the criminally insane and doing whatever else comes naturally to your kind?"

"Ah, my sincerest apologies. I hadn't realized I was speaking to a child who had a _name._ My assumption was that meaningless people didn't bother with such things." You pause as she quivers with a restrained and savage fury, keeping your eye on that drifting hand. The way she said her name implied that you ought to recognize it; probably a well-known blue-blood, for the sake of comparison. A blue-blood who believes herself violet, you suspect. It's almost cute. _Almost._

"If you wish to insult both me and the honor of my family, then you must be prepared to face the consequences." With that, her hand closes around the rapier's grip. _Honor_... it doesn't mean the same things to her species as it does to you, you've learned, though there is some overlap. Family is also important to them, even if you don't really understand it, and you'll do your best to take advantage of the phenomenon.

"Sadly for both of us, I do my best to speak the truth. Feel free to strike, then; I'm sure that your family's honor will benefit greatly from the slaughter of an unarmed girl."

You'd all but swear that her strained and bulging eyes are about to explode. The hand drops to her side and your smirk widens.

" _Hmph._ Consider yourself lucky that I have no time to waste on _garbage_. Your blood will have to tarnish my blade another day."

"Such a shame," you say, drier than a sun-scorched Alternian desert, and she storms out of the structure entirely, slamming the door in her wake. After a few deep breaths to settle your excited bloodpusher and oxygen sacs, a welcome sense of peace graces you, even if it's likely to dissipate at any moment.

In any case, the incident has reminded you that finding a weapon sooner than later would be extremely wise, and now you can go about the task in much better spirits. There's one problem to be remedied, though; a lack of human currency.

It really is a shame that 'Weiss' creature hadn't found you armed; she had the look and bearing of the affluent, and you're sure that her corpse would have supplied you with more than enough.

 

* * *

R **W** BY

NJKA

* * *

  

The walk back to your driver is maddening. How _dare_ that faunus _trash_ speak to you that way?! Damn her, damn her, _damn her!_ And today of all days! Unbelievable.

You can't waste time thinking of it, though. This day you'll need to freeze yourself as deeply as you can. Like the falling snow, you have to stay tranquil, stay empty, or you'll end up doing much worse than shamefully crying in a public restroom. Your rage must be kept frozen. The speech you have yet to make will require nothing less than a woman carved from the ice itself. Fortunately, Weiss Schnee is up to the task.

As the car rolls away, you bite the inside of your lip until you taste blood. Winter has yet to _end_ and you're about to do this for the _third time._ That's the price of being a Schnee beneath your father, you suppose. Beacon can't come soon enough, and with a bit of luck...

With a bit of luck, this will be the last funeral you need to attend before you leave.

 

* * *

RWBY

NJ **K** A

* * *

  

It would appear that the race you now embody in flesh if not in spirit are known as faunus, and 'your' kind are _not_ well-liked. You'll stick to the main streets as much as you can, for now; you might risk the alleyways again once you have a weapon. Hopefully chainsaws aren't sold for an exorbitant price in this world, and hopefully you can find a way to carry one without a specibus or sylladex.

Low groaning interrupts your train of thought. The humans of this world are _tough_ even if these specimens were much weaker than you, and it's unsettling that they don't seem to suffer more than minimal harm until pushed beyond a certain threshold. Four of them are very still, but you clearly weren't as thorough as you believed; one woman is struggling with what you think is a strangely designed energy sidearm, trying to steady her aim even as she lies battered in the shadows.

You kick the gun out of her hand, a loud crack accompanying at least one newly broken finger. They really must not know how to judge an enemy's strength, or the five of them never would have been stupid enough to ambush you the way they did. It's a lucky break in the end, though. Even if you don't really know what it's worth yet, you seem to have gathered a decent amount of what you think you're reading as 'Lien' in the aftermath of that sad joke of a strife, and anything is better than nothing. You can probably even sell that pistol, whatever it's worth.

Taking hold of the woman, you drag her to her feet. Her blood is like a liquid brand from this distance, and while you don't think that the stuff is _necessary_ for your survival, multiple sets of instincts insist it would be wise to feed once in a while, and this _is_ a perfect opportunity. You really should just drain her until you're full and finish her off, but it's true that they ended up making things much easier for you... maybe you'll be a little bit forgiving. It's not smart to just let enemies go, and you would  _certainly_ never be sloppy about something like that.

Still, though.

As your fangs tear gently at her throat and that indescribably primal taste flows over your tongue and down your throat, you decide on letting her live as thanks for her foolishness, and if you're still feeling charitable in a minute or two, maybe you'll leave enough blood to let her and the rest limp home in shame.


	7. Looking For Satellites (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boy, did this ever show up late. Had some things to deal with "I R L" (as the kids would say), plus shifting the plot around to make use of end-of-volume-3 information, plus I accidentally wrote a chapter, like, somewhere between three and six chapters early, so that's just kinda sitting there in my writing folder, waiting for its promised day.

_expressed in every word i'll ever speak_

_brighter than all the stars combined_

_more than the waters, earth, and sky_

_all that i wish and all that i dream_

 

[vnv nation – arena](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-_BGjvTGdI)

 

* * *

RWBY

N  **J** K A

* * *

**29 days prior to Beacon**

 

You were right about things being better tomorrow, because you've just woken up to the smell of... actually, you're not completely sure _what_ it is, but you _are_ sure that eating it is absolutely the most important thing you will ever do. _Ever._

Where are you, though? It looks like you're in somebody's living room, but it's not one you've been in before. Something's familiar about it, though... You can smell two other people nearby. One of them is right next to the source of _the smell of heaven_ and the other is – oh, right.

Last night floods your mind all at once, and honestly some of it was kind of awful! You know you're not _powerless_ , but you sure _feel_ like it, compared to what you used to be. But it turns out this planet has other people with animal parts! And... a lot of people are apparently kind of racist about that, and that sucks, but _still!_ You've never really personally dealt with any direct discrimination (kinda hard when you live alone on an island with your dog!), but you watched and read lots of media from back on Earth, so if anything you'd have thought people would be racist about your skin, not the doggy ears. It's sort of funny in that way where something isn't actually funny at all.

A happier thought: you did meet the super-nicest girl in the universe! And her sister, for all of twenty seconds, but she seemed cool. She must really trust Ruby to just let a stranger stay over without really cross-examining anything. Her name came up, you think? But it was all kind of foggy and other than _maybe_ starting with a Y, you have no idea. Ruby is pretty memorable, though! Not to mention she did sort of... hmm. You're not sure she exactly 'saved your life,' since even without any real martial arts training, you're pretty sure your stats are decent enough to make up for it against random normal people. So maybe it would have been okay. Probably.

It felt _horrible_ , though, when it comes right down to it. Not just because... well, it's complicated! For one thing, not having a gun on hand is just scary. Ruby carries her whole crazy thing sort of folded up on her back, so maybe it's fine to carry them around, but you can't just. You can't just reach out to the air and _be ready_. God, you can't even have multiple weapons unless they're physically portable. The laws of physics are completely broken and illogical here, to the point that it goes far beyond just being another universe. Wow, who even knows what this is? Do you need some new terminology here? Maybe you should think of it as a different 'reality _._ ' There are probably a bunch of other universes floating outside this one that all have similar rules.

But the gun thing wasn't really the worst part. Being unarmed is _so_ wrong, but... You really liked things better when it was monsters who wanted to hurt you and not other people, especially for such a stupid reason. It was gross, weird, nasty, like nameless little things crawling all over you. And it... well, you _know_ they were awful people working from really dumb and selfish places, not to mention just _incorrect_ , so why did it sink in so deep like this? Why is it sticking around so _vividly?_

... It's not like you can't figure out the answer to that, but knowing isn't making it any better. Actually, you're pretty sure knowing is making it even worse on at least three levels. And if _you_ know, then even with whatever reasons they have for thinking that way... even if you can trace the kind of cause and effect that _leads_ to this, how can you even come close to understanding somebody who'd choose to stay ignorant and hurt people rather than pay attention to the world? Is it really such hard work not to hate and judge someone over who or what they resemble?

Ugh. Okay, then! There's going to be more than enough time to be upset about that later, so those guys can go to... Huh. Go to... Okay, that's... this is _really_ weird. This is maybe the worst thing so far, honestly, in its own insidious way? Because other people are one thing, as nasty as they can get. But.

Suddenly you've realized there are words that don't work exactly right anymore.

You can strain your memory and remember them all, sift for them and find what they were, but it's harder to think them in a _concrete_ sense. This is like when you were little and it seemed like 'bad words' were something you couldn't just _say_ or you'd get all nervous like you were breaking a rule even though there was no one there to care. Dave sort of put an early end to that, but still.

This uni – this _reality_ makes it hard to curse. Not impossible, you don't think, but it's _difficult_. Okay. You'll prove you can still control your thoughts.

_What the hell is going on?_

... Should you be glad you could think 'what the hell,' or terrified that the word you meant to use starts with an 'F?' You could do it. You _could._ So why do you have this powerful instinct _not to?_ Why do you _want_ to comply with something like this, not even knowing why? God, you're dancing around even _thinking_ it, somehow.

You know what? No. Too creepy, too existentially disturbing for morning thoughts, nope, nope, rewind. So. Okay, then! Where you left off. Those guys can go to hell, because you are going to have a _good day_. That's your decision. Everything is crazy, so you'll wring every good thing out of this that you possibly can. Maybe a good place to start is that smell! It's coming from the same place Ruby's is, so that's good. She has a really unusual scent. If you had to put it into words (which, honestly, doesn't work all that well), you'd say it's a mix of human, steel, gunsmoke, and roses. Her sister in the bedroom is human, regular smoke, and... sunflowers, you think? There's something else, too, but it's not something you know how to describe verbally, except that it feels... _red._

Dragging yourself off the couch and carefully not stepping on that half-eaten candy bar that's covered in dust bunnies, you try to smooth out your wrinkled god tier outfit, and then stop. That should've unwrinkled _itself_. So then this thing isn't self-renewing anymore. It's just, well... clothes. You know what, whatever! Who cares about the stupid clothes! Wrinkles are mostly no match for you anyway.

Ruby turns when you cross the doorframe, pausing in the middle of loudly flopping some plates around a little table. Are those little wolves all over her pajamas? You can only approve.

"Oh, hi! Good morning! I hope you slept okay, I mean our couch probably isn't super great so –" Oh jeez, that's right, she's almost as rambly as a certain other red-associated person, except more nervous and less bizarre.

"No, it's fine! Actually, I think I did sleep okay." It's true, too. You're not completely sure _why_ it's true until you realize that you didn't _go_ anywhere. No terrible void full of alien ghosts, no swirling infinities of impossible creatures that exist in more dimensions than the _Witch of Space_ can handle... You just slept like a normal person, and you're not sure that's actually happened before.

There's something you should be saying now, right? If this was online, you'd just type back the same kind of question, right? It should basically be the same thing, right? Oh god. You never really... all your life on the island, those years and years on the battleship with your whole world mostly consisting of two other people... Are old movies and TV shows and stuff the only reason you have any clue how to interact with other people in physical space at all? Or, at the very least, people you haven't already known for years? Shouldn't there be some basic code of etiquette that you're familiar with, even just little things? Would it apply here even if there was one in your original reality? Do you actually _have_ to worry about this stuff? Because you're seriously worrying about this stuff all of a sudden. How do you act around someone who hasn't already known you really well? They've been so awesome and you're starting to realize you don't even know how to, like, _be a person._

And then she says stuff, because time is totally a thing and you've probably just been staring blankly ahead for five seconds.

"Um, are you alright?" _No, not really._ _Even if this was my world I'd be lost. I'm not even a little bit –_

"Yeah! Don't worry about it. It's just..." It's hard to look her in the eyes, so when you talk, you're sort of directing all of it at a random tile on the kitchen floor. Well, when it comes down to it, can you even say this is hyperbole? "I've never really spent time in a house with humans before." You haven't, either, not in any sense that matters. Prospitians, yeah, but that's just different? That whole planet basically loved you by default and here you actually have to be ( _get_ to be?) just another person and it turns out that's actually really complicated!

The silence after that is heavy enough to feel like humidity. The air has its own weight, pressing slightly down on everything, especially you. Ruby, who looks like in this moment she's almost as anxious as you are, finally starts mumbling.

"... is that weird? Am I doing anything wrong, I mean, are things different in... I mean, wherever you're from? Or do you just do things differently, or, well, I don't know... um..." Uh oh, wait, no, you shouldn't have said that! It was weird enough already and she's interpreting it _totally_ wrong, you didn't mean it was because she's human but you're apparently a whatever-it-was, you just meant you're kinda different from _any_ people and you're awkward and you don't know how things are actually done...

Instincts are dumb, because you don't actually know why you're suddenly hugging her and that's probably not good, but she seems to roll with it after one frozen moment. You sniffle a bit, swallow. Resist the weird urge to keep clinging to the closest thing that happens to be real. To just use her like a tool for hiding from your own problems. Letting go is hard. You don't even know her, but it's still hard.

Something about the lack of awkwardness when she disengages gives you the feeling she's put up with stuff like that before.

"No, you're awesome, I just don't want to do anything dumb. I don't want to seem ungrateful, or rude or anything. So..." It looks like she's not going to say anything about what happened a few seconds ago, and if she's not going to, then you're not exactly sure you can either. Honestly, you're not sure there's a reason to. If she's silently forgiving you for doing something _that_ weird, you'd feel like you were insulting her if you still beat yourself up over it too much. You just have to let go and move on.

"What? _You_ shouldn't have to worry about anything! And I think you're probably the least rude person in the building anyway, I mean I'm not exactly great at people stuff and I'm always tripping over myself and anyway _Yang's_ around somewhere and it's basically impossible to outdo _her_ at rudeness–"

"Hey, you know I can hear that, right?" There's a _lot_ of old smoke and gunpowder soaking the air with both of them in the same place. It's a good smell. It kind of reminds you of home. Yang – you were right, it _did_ start with a Y – yawns and stretches, and then Ruby yawns and glares at her, and then _you_ yawn and hesitantly pull yourself a chair and sit down. For some reason sitting down is less nerve-wracking than standing up. Probably because you'd have no reason to just stand there. Jeez, this is obvious stuff, what's your deal?

"So how'd you sleep?", Ruby asks as her sister flops groggily into another chair and weaves her hands around behind her head, shaking her massive golden hair-curtain into better shape. Yang rubs at her eyes and looks like she's thinking really hard about something, but she doesn't actually answer. "Heeeey, Remnant to Yang, anybody there?" Hmm, is that what this planet's called, maybe? That would have some serious implications... Another thought for later.

It crosses your mind that these two really don't look related at all, but then you consider yourself and John, Dave and Rose. Even if that's a totally different kind of thing, it also sort of isn't. There's a lot of difference in both of those pairs. You could probably find a resemblance between Ruby and Yang if you kept looking... or maybe it's just an adoption-type situation? Yang shakes her head a little bit, clearing away some leftover sleep.

"No problems. I did have a really, _really_ weird dream, though."

"Ooh, what was it? Did you go on an awesome dream adventure? You have to tell me everything!"

"Bleh, I wish. I don't know, I can't remember the details now."

... huh. You'll let that go, since it's none of your business, but you do wonder why she lied about some silly dream. It's not like sniffing that stuff out is something you're really good at, it's more that she really isn't all that good at lying, and you can get a lot more from people with your senses than you could back before you went god tier and everything started working more... doggily. You just sort of naturally pick on certain tells, so it's harder for bad lies to actually slip by you.

Yang shrugs and looks over at her younger sister. How old are they, actually? You think pretty close to your age, but considering this is a completely new reality to you, maybe it's a bad idea make too many assumptions about stuff, even stuff that seems really 'normal.'

"Did you set the timer on that bacon? I'm hoping you won't _completely_ torch it today. You don't want to get stuck with _me_ cooking, do you?" Ruby pretend glares at her and goes to check what looks mostly like a microwave but is probably actually something weird.

There's obviously a social dynamic here, but it's one you don't have a place in. You can't help but feel like you're somewhere you really don't belong, intruding on something that doesn't relate to you. It's probably true; even _you_ aren't really sure how you ended up here. Rather than worry about that even more, you catch a stray thought and latch onto it. What did she just say about the not-microwave stuff?

She said _'bacon.'_ Is that what that smell is? Is _that_ bacon? Oh _wow_. You've never actually had that! It doesn't bother you or anything, because, well, why would it, it just wasn't something that was ever available, but now that you can _smell_ it like this, oh man, that really seals a lot into place. All those memes about this stuff finally make sense.

... You also might happen to be absolutely starving and finally starting to notice. Whoops. Never did get around to eating anything last night, you were too busy being confused and scared and then hassled and then helped out, all one big mess of things with barely time to even think in between, except for when you were so tired it didn't count for anything.

The point is, you're not saying you'd happily kill someone over bacon. That's a super ridiculous thought. You'd at least have the courtesy to feel guilty about it.

Everybody's sort of quiet, especially you. Either you're off-putting or they're just not sure how to deal with the situation, because they're both really obviously energetic girls. Not to mention it seemed like some big important thing had been happening? They must have talked about it before you woke up, if things are even close to this calm. You _were_ definitely last to actually get up, even if Yang looks like she's still five percent asleep.

Actually, with how tired _she_ looks and how cohesive her _sister_ does, maybe she got jerked awake at the crack of dawn and eventually went back to bed for a few hours.

Well, you do all seem to need some time to just... hang around and maybe de-stress a little, for what are probably different reasons! So you honestly don't mind just listening to them make weird small talk while you force yourself not to feel too guilty about devouring a _lot_ of their bacon, which turns out to taste even better than it smells. Yang makes some comment about her sister actually timing their 're-heater' right for once. One appliance's name learned! That's a start right there. It helps that it's pretty obviously a microwave, or at least something that has the same general function.

You're pretty sure breakfasts are supposed to be several different things, but apparently Ruby just made a huge pile of bacon. Other 'reality' or not, you have a sneaking suspicion it's not just cultural differences. They are _definitely_ the kind of girls who do this stuff. Thank god you managed to run into people you can honestly get along with. As horrible as your situation technically is, this is like the world going out of its way to remind you that the ridiculous story of your life isn't _always_ completely dark, even when nothing makes any sense. Not that it _ever_ made sense, but... yeah.

It ends up feeling surprisingly nice to just let some time pass and take a break from thinking too much while still conscious, even just a short one. You don't really shake off the anxiety, but at least you're relieving some other weird kind of tension. Actually, when you think about it... you're a silly person, aren't you? You've always gotten by mostly by yourself, and you didn't think you envied anyone for having a different life, so it really _is_ silly of you to sit here like this, wasting time wondering what it might have been like if you'd grown up having a family, too.


	8. Inverse Philosophy (2)

_crawling underneath our feet_

_a river running black and green_

_from the heart of the gallows tree_

_where the future and our fate_

_will bleed into the world below_

 

[the birthday massacre - divide](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQfom6vaCrk)

 

* * *

RWBY

 **N** JKA

* * *

  **30 days prior to Beacon**

 

Mew're glad this alien girl helped you out, but you reely wish it hadn't been because you passed out in the middle of a conversation! You also don't know how to feel about waking up alone in the middle of this city with some weird alien money. It's not that she ditched you, that's the pawbvious thing to do, it's that you never asked for anymoby's charity! She left some clothes, too... bluuuuh. You flop over a backless wooden flora-rich recreational zone typical sitting rectangle and poke at some grass with one of your useless de-clawed digits.

It's been three nights or days or whatever. Is it both? How do these craysea people even manage to track it all? Anyway, you're _still_ getting used to whatever catpunned to your body. You're not a _human_ , so that's something, and you do have a tail! That's not _new,_ but this one's made of real skin and fur and everything instead of cyber-thingies, so that's kind of amazing!

All the other changes are... maybe less than amazing. At least you have some practice at not being a normal troll, though. Being a sprite was reely different, but you guess the experience is helping you not freak out, and anything to make stuff less weird is furry good right now!

The humans here hate people like you, or at least some of them do? They remind you of those highbloods who are too dumb to remember lowbloods can still krill them, right down to the part where they can shrug off, like, five times as much damage as you, _easy_.

Good thing you're used to hunting things that can take twenty times as much damage as you!

You're also learning that humans and... what are you supposed to be again? Pawnus, you think? Well, _Faunus_ , but come on. You're learning that the humans and Faunus around here act like you're insulting their Cod just for punching someone in the throat and trying to claw out their eyes, and their ineffective legislacerator-ish people make a feline for you just for defending yourself! You did attack first, but that's the smart choice when an argument gets ugly. Even a pupa should know that! Everyone here is _so_ _strange_ _._

At least you _are_ learning, though. There are some things to work out, like how to get _weapons_ ; it wasn't hard to find somewhere selling them, but you got the eeling they didn't want catgirls in there, and they chased you off when they found out you don't have a 'license' for them. That's even less fair than higher taxes on lowbloods way back on Alternia! At least most trolls could purrobably defend themselves there.

So here you are, tracing pointless circles in the grass and dirt. Moby someone will find you soon. If one fishkitty ended up here for no reason you can remember, then there mast be others, right? Sigh, roll over, stare up into alien skies. If you could afford a husktop, or maybe something smaller to carry around since you can't even get into your _sylladex_ , you'd find the closest thing to Trollian and sign up in case someone else had the same idea... but you can't! They call those unfolding thingies 'scrolls,' so you know that much, but you also know they aren't cheap at all.

Suddenly, a face is hovering upside down over yours.

"Oh, hi," you mumble. Did she find you again on purrpose? "Your city sucks."

" _Their_ city," she half-snaps.

"Wait, whose? The humans? Beclaws it looks like everybody's city to me." Pawse. All this sunlight is making you sleepy instead of dead, which is de-fin-ately better. This body actually _likes_ it. You should sit up, but you're much too lazy right now. The rectangle hurts your back a little, but you don't mind too much. Maybe in a minute when it starts to get annoying.

"Yes, theirs," she says, and she sounds pretty mad, but she's not hissing or anything. She's kind of half-whispering like this is some big deal nobody should hear. Weird. Weird, weird, weird, all these people are so _off._ "Look around you. How many Faunus do you see in Vale? One for every fifteen or twenty humans, and that's _not_ an accident."

"So then krill them all and take over, or if you don't feel like that kind of thing, then just leave?" Not really a moray-eel problem there, in your opinion, but she looks like you just punched her or something, and that's not really fair. She _did_ just want to help, even if she should have asked first. "Did I say something wrong?"

"... I... _yes_ you said someting 'wrong!'  _Obviously!_ So you _are_ White Fang, then." There's a dangerous look in her eyes that wasn't a thing before. Weird.

"I'm what fang? Who's that? I'm pretty shore I'm Nepeta Leijon." You yawn and stretch and make yourself get up before you actually do end up taking a catnap, and also so she stops being upside down, it's disorienting. Oh, she looks confused and mad and maybe a little scared. Is anyone _ever_ going to make sense again? Ever?

"Why would you say something like that in _public?!_ Do you _want_ to be arrested?"

"Say... what, exactly?"

" _Anything that makes you sound like a terrorist!_ And I don't think..." She's sort of struggling with something. Why is she swallowing so hard? "I don't think ki – ... fighting them is the right solution."

"Well, if you're hissed off at someone for a good reason and you hate each other platonically, shouldn't you just kill them so they're not a fishue later on?" This is _wriggler_ stuff. Something is seriously wrong with this girl! She's staring at you like you're an alien.

... Oh right. Fair enough!

"Wait, platonically as opposed to wh... never mind. Where are you from that you think this is okay?"

"Alternia," you say, blinking and rubbing your eyes a little. "Why wouldn't it be okay? People kill each other all the time."

"So, a village, then? What kind of village teaches _that_ way of thinking?" You have no idea what she means by 'village,' but that's probably not important.

"The normal kind of vil-whatever? It's all just ashes and dead people now anyway, so there's no reason to waste time thinking about it."

She's quiet for a while. You pass the time cracking your finger joints and wiggling them around a bit. They're jointed sort of _wrong_ , not too badly, but enough to be furry annoying, so you're trying to get used to them. You might have them for a long time, for all you know!

"I'm Blake," she finally says. "Blake Belladonna."

"... Are you trying to be friends?"

For some reason, she's confused. You're almast starting to think she has real problems.

"W—Well, I'm," is she _blushing?_ Eww, it's so weird knowing that not only is her blood _candy red_ , but so is yours.  _That's_  the part that reely makes your fur stand on end, because she's not you, but _you_ definitely are. "I don't know. If you want to put it that way, then yes."

"Yay! I'm okay with that. Friends are good! All my friends are hissing or dead right now, so this is a pretty good time, I think. Hey, if you're my friend now... do you know anywhere to get weapons without a license? It feels gross and weird walking around unarmed like this." One of her ears twitches under that bow. Why's she wearing that, anyway? Weird. Everything is just weird.

"They're – ... yes. It does feel... wrong," she says, mostly to you but also to herself. "Why ask me?"

"Whale, you have your crazy gun sword whip thing, right? I just thought that purrhaps you'd have some advice!" You shrug. Blake takes a slow breath through her human nose – well, is it human? bluuhh – and sighs.

"Right. Right." Shakes her head. Now you're starting to wonder about the pawsibility that you just brought up some fishue of hers. That sucks, you didn't mean to! You'd apologize if you were more sure about it. "Well, if you still have any of that Lien left over, I think I know a place."

When you smile and she smiles back, hers is smaller and a lot more nervous, but you're still happy to see it. The poor gill looks like she doesn't have a friend in the world, and if you're going to be one then she'd better perk up those ears!

"We'll be going to the _'bad'_ part of town," she says, making air quotes with her cl – fingers, "so just... don't do anything insane until we're mostly away from humans? Can you at least promise that?" Of course you can do that! You will be the very pictpurr of weird alien politeness.

"I won't kill them if they don't attack me!" She stares at you for a second, opens her mouth, closes it, then shakes her head. Still don't know what you're getting wrong, but that's okay!

You're _sure_ this is all going to work out just fine.


	9. Let Tensions Evolve (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope the in medias res thing here isn't too jarring, it felt like the best way to get this chapter across, so I just rolled with it.

_on the outside i freeze, but my heart is on fire_

_time goes by, every day i am getting older_

_but with unending pain i fight with the spirit of youth_

_i will wait until the end of time, i wanna be a soldier, a warrior_

 

[pellek - tempest](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nd1KqJr6j8Q)

 

* * *

R **W** BY

NJKA

* * *

 **30 days prior to Beacon**  

 

It's a stupid and irritating thing how people meet, part, and then meet again. _'A small world_ _'_ indeed. What a _week_ this has been, speaking at length for the funeral of someone you didn't allow yourself to know, enduring the growing strain of Father's disapproval as your enrollment all the way in Vale looms closer and closer. You'd do _anything_ to skim this month and wake up so far from Atlas that you won't have to look back until you're ready to bring your own company to its knees.

You _hoped_ this week's stupidity was _over,_ and _that_ was certainly a mistake. If you believed in any sort of god, you'd be cursing it now, because there's something fundamentally unfair about not only running into the same caustic and violent Faunus who accosted you last week, but running into her _in another public bathroom._

How did your argument lead to this? It was inevitable, you suppose, considering the parties involved, but you deserve _better_ than this absolute farce! Back and forth and back and forth, stupid words from a stupid creature countered by a daughter of honor and intellect, the building _rage._ To insult you? Unforgivable. To insult your family? _Unforgivable._

To call _you,_ future Huntress Weiss Schnee, a weak-willed and petty _child_ _?! AGAIN?!_

Perhaps it's not such a shock that it's come to this, an infuriatingly well-dressed piece of filth with an ugly and brutish weapon about to be crushed beneath the weight of finesse and legitimate skill. It really is a nice dress, though, fine work tailored with care, a smooth black fabric with tasteful green trim and what you suppose is her symbol sewn above her breast in brighter jade. A shame you'll be leaving it in _absolute ruin_.

You don't bother opening with a glyph; she doesn't deserve the honor of your full might. That ugly, screeching _chainsaw_ can't possibly save her from a fencer's speed. Settling into readiness to deflect or avoid the inevitable slow charge, you try to clear your mind, to find that place deep inside where perfection is frozen and waiting –

And then she's two feet away and swinging far more quickly than you imagined, a startled backstep and screech of metal barely saving you from the brutal arc of that enormous whirring atrocity. The next swing is equally swift but you're ready for it now, ice spreading through your mind and purging any distractions. You underestimated her speed, but the fact remains that she's slower than _you._ If she could strike with that thing half as quickly as she can apparently move the rest of her body, this might actually be dangerous.

But she can't.

The third swing you let crackle and scream off the side of your blade. The fourth you redirect upward and away, a terrible position for _you_ if she can recover in time, but a far worse one for her if she _can't_.

And she can't.

The satisfaction of landing such an easy blow abruptly scatters into confusion – something feels _wrong._ A normal thrust rebounds as if shoved away by some kind of magnetic gel, natural and expected, but there's none of that here. Something hot and wet flecks across your sword arm, bits of your torso, and even one bit on your cheek. You wipe it away with your free hand in this silent moment, and when you understand what's happening, you stumble from the outrageous force of a glacier's breaking in two inside of yourself.

There is a girl's blood running slowly down Myrtenaster's once pristine blade, angled up through the shoulder and apparently managing to avoid the _most_ vital points of the hu – Faunus body in that area. Your weapon feels wrong in your hands, _sticky_ in motion. Well, of course it does. It's currently impaling a living body.

You're still staring in half-comprehending horror when the chainsaw catches your midsection and lifts you clear off your feet, stars of aura-blunted pain flashing along its cutting path and your back your hand wrist head, bits of plaster from a shaken ceiling like snow too heavy for itself and

peel yourself away from the Weiss-shaped craterdentimpactzone in the wall, building's shock settling and

finally stand, dazed, aura still intact. It's been a long, long time since you were hit like _that_ – harder than tutors, harder than spars with Winter, harder than Father. The only comparison you can make is to that _thing_ and its colossal iron fist. How could someone with her build land a blow so utterly destructive? You try to regain your composure and correct your stance, but you can't. Apparently, holding a sword is difficult when you don't have one.

Across the room, that same blade is _still run through her_ , bright blood dripping to the floor, a dark stain showing through the green trim near her collarbone. This is – wrong – you didn't – how – a lurch and twist in your gut. You fail to strangle a gasp when the Faunus, loosing one hand from her monstrosity, _grabs Myrtenaster and pulls it free,_ only _wincing_ as she does it and the red stain of her life continues to spread. This isn't... what you wanted. She should have had _aura_ , she's a fighter, this makes no sense and this isn't...

"I'm so... I'm..." Where do you find the words? What do you even want to _say?_

She tosses the bloodied extension of your will across the floor, letting it clatter and slide to a stop at your feet. It takes you a full three seconds to realize that _she's preparing to continue._ The sword doesn't look _right_ anymore. It's not... it's not yours. Nothing of yours would be so crudely stained, so hateful, vicious –

"i didn't mean it." You hardly recognize your own voice, weak and trembling with a mind of its own. "this isn't... this isn't what i _wanted_." She staggers just slightly. It must hurt. It has to hurt _so much,_ and you don't understand how she isn't screaming, how she's _still holding that chainsaw,_ preparing for the next round of blows. The pain hardly shows on her face, only the strange and inquisitive lance of hardened jade eyes.

"Hmm," she says, almost unflapped, "strange. You should be dead right now." And she should be sobbing on the ground, and she's _not_ but she _should_ be but she _shouldn't_ because this isn't

"... this isn't what i wanted," you whisper again, and when you swallow it _hurts._

"Then what _did_ you think you wanted?" She raises the saw above her head, _somehow_ , with what must be horribly damaged muscles and tendons, takes the step that heralds nearly every fighter's charge. You have to get to Myrtenaster, have to be ready, if she hits you like that one more time you won't be shrugging it off, but the feeling of holding it as it jerked, twitched, embedded in flesh, a sickened daze, the sound of crimson drops splashing on ceramic tiles, you won't be ready. This time, you really might be cut in two.

"not _this_ "

and with a thump and the sharp crash of heavy metal, she passes out face down on the ground. The chainsaw clatters and clicks, but a stroke of luck's landed the thing so that its own blade won't propel it in random directions.

Myrtenaster's weight is different in your hand, now. There's nothing here to wipe away the blood clinging stark red along the blade, red on your hands, red pooling on the floor beneath an unconscious Faunus who attempted to kill you.

You know perfectly well what your legacy demands, and it won't be hard to carry out the duty. One more strike, unmissable. Effortless. Even simply _leaving_ would end in her death and your victory, your first true wound delivered to the greater threat. It's the right thing to do. Father would be proud.

 _... Father_ would be proud.

The call you place is anonymous, and you make sure that you're long gone before help arrives.

 

* * *

 RWBY

NJ **K** A

* * *

  **29 days prior to Beacon**

 

Your shoulder is a raging pyre in a heaving sea of black. It hurts. It does not stop hurting even when a growing chaos of light and sound and _input_ drags you out and into somewhere soft and sterile. Moving is _hard_ , harder than it should be, especially for such a light wound, and all in a rush you understand what's happening.

Kanaya Maryam is no longer a troll. Kanaya Maryam is a fragile thing that can be laid low by a single thrust of a rapier.

This is a 'hospital,' you think; you've seen such places in human films and television, read about them in some of Rose's books. What a strange concept it is to dedicate entire structures – entire _careers_ – to mending the wounds and diseases of others without any incentive to care. The naivete is as astonishing as ever, as is the human tendency to save those who should have died from their own failures in life and in self-treatment.

Was Rose ever hurt or sick, aided in a place like this? Was Strider?

... Maybe there are _some_ times when naivete is forgivable. Such a selfish thought. It's typical of you, really, to let your own bias brush against your sense of objective reality.

Your arm _moves_ but the pain is startling, so much worse than it should be. You are not who you were. All you are now is a _mammal_ that can be felled by a single blow to a non-crucial part of her body. Someone could enter at any moment now, with any motive, and the state you're entering is _not_ for the eyes or ears of others, but you can't _help_ it. Please, _please_ let no one find you right now.

Only one human is allowed to see you cry.

How can you _accept_ this weakness? It's wrong. It's wrong it's wrong it's _terrifying._ That maddening girl should be nothing but drying stains and bitter memories after what you did, but even that couldn't overcome the natural defenses these people have and you lack. This isn't _fair._ You can't (protect) fight anyone like this, can't (live to find her) survive in such a world.

If only will alone could serve as a shield, you think that you could make yourself invincible. If only _you_ carried that invisible alien barrier, you would shroud yourself tight and be the (shield that will not shatter) warrior you once were and maybe even _more_.

The green tears staining your hands remind you that even _bitter children_ are now enough to lay waste to a jadeblood. Your mind must be lost in physical and mental pain, because you're _more_ than aware that you currently bleed the same red as the rest of this world. But even so, do tears... _glow?_

It's _not_ a delusion. Those transparent tears are reflecting a jade light that continues to grow. It spirals from every pore, trailing out your eyes and ears and mouth, pouring like smoke with a mind of its own and growing solid, stable, until your entire body is encased in a ghostly, rubbery nothingness.

You have to know. You have to know for _sure_ before you permit yourself any further hope. Fortunately, someone's forgotten their scrawl-oriented cylindrical ink dispenser on a small table nearby. Their _pen_. Ugh. You suppose that your caste is high enough to somewhat justify blueblood speech, but you never cared for the overwhelming simplicity and the confusion it could cause. Unfortunately, this is _not_ Alternia. This is not even a damned _meteor,_ and the humans and Faunus in this world are just like the humans you (know) knew, and it'll serve you well to adjust at least partially to their vernacular.

And so you pick up the 'pen' with your right arm, aware that this injury will only worsen if you use your dominant hand, which you carefully place on your lap.

You raise the pen and bring it down with all your might to punch clean through that very hand. The pain is sharp but... not sharp enough? It doesn't align with what you've done at all, a stabbing pain that vanishes immediately and without a trace. The pen is still clutched in your (claw) hand and your target is completely unharmed.

Most likely you're not in your right mind with all of the epinephrine and who knows what else pumping through you, and most likely that's why you don't mind the pained laugh you can't keep from rising. How are you supposed to _feel?_ Now and truly you know that you're one of _them_ and not yourself, because this reality-bending film is clinging to you in a way that feels very permanent, very _natural,_ and that ability is _not_ one that an 'alien' should possess.

You're not yourself, and you'll probably never be yourself again, but you can _survive_... for whatever survival is worth to someone mired in a lonesome and baffling world and stripped of her very _species._

... but that's not worth your time at this moment. Whoever runs this 'hospital' could be back any second now, and you need to be somewhere else, anywhere else. You take a quick look at your surroundings – first floor, a window you'll easily bypass, and an envelope in stark white lying on the little table where you found the pen. Its back is sealed with pressed wax in the form of a razor-sharp snowflake.

Out on the street again you have the time to open it, even if you can guess its source. Inside is a simple folded note along with an elegant script you shouldn't be able to read but somehow can.

_'As recompense for undeserved mercy, the chainsaw-wielding bat Faunus who has been handily defeated now owes one (1) Favor to Weiss Schnee of the Schnee Dust Company.'_

Oh. Oh, god _damn_ her _._

You make the decision immediately: if you find out that stupid girl is waxing pitch for you, you're going to burn this city to the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anybody waiting for Weiss / Kanaya sass action can be assured that it's on its way soon enough.


	10. Looking For Satellites (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot believe I'm 20k into this thing and the actual plot's made this little progress. I swear to god, anything you could say in ten words, I'll manage to say in about four hundred, with at least twice as many commas as your high school English teacher would've tolerated.

  _shout our bruises and shattered words_

_is your saving grace, saving grace in vain?_

_i'm safe from the wreckage, my memory's bestowed_

_this place just feels too far from home_

 

[dead sara – whispers and ashes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PjUTg5AiMmY)

 

* * *

RWB **Y**

NJKA

* * *

**29 days prior to Beacon**

 

The one thing that you hate more than anything else _isn't_ awkward silences... but they're pretty high up the list. Right now you're processing how weird it feels to suddenly have a total stranger in your kitchen. Ruby's obviously got no idea how to balance a conversation, bacon, and the whole _Beacon_ thing still has both of you kinda scatter-brained and distracted. What's-her-Jade looks like she's about as good with people as your sister is. The only reason you've put up with it so long is that you've been busy trying to decide whether or not last night was _all_ a dream or just _some_ of it was. Not sure how to feel about the fact that your gut says she was definitely real.

But you can't confirm that stuff yet, so what you have here is breakfast. _Awkward_ breakfast. ... Yeah, you're not dealing with _that_ for one more second.

"So, where are you from?" You already know the answer... except you don't, because you heard it from someone who's not exactly reliable. Even if she was, there are a _whole_ lot of questions. It takes Jade a full second to realize you're talking to her, and then she somehow finds a way to look even smaller than she actually is. Kinda impressive for a girl _Ruby_ _'s_ got an inch or two on.

"I..." Oh, come on, get it moving along, it's not a hard thing to answer. "... Sorry if this is weird, but... what does the word earth mean to you?" That is _not_ an answer, but whatever. Maybe she's going somewhere with it.

" _Earth?_ I mean, there's earth dust, and then there's regular dirt and rocks I guess. Why does that matter?"

"Well, because the place I'm from is called Earth!"

"... Weird name for a village." Ruby shoots you a quick glare and you shrug. "What? It's true. What's it like there? Rubes made it sound like it was a big deal." Okay, now you're being a jerk, because you already have _some_ idea of the story Ruby got, but she still might have more to say. Sometimes it takes a good shove to make somebody talk. Or, you know, a well-placed grab and some improv, but homeless girls are a lot cleaner to get info from than gangsters.

"It's okay! And that's a little bit hard to explain. I mean, my island _was_ part of it, but it was basically just me there, and I mostly learned about the rest of it from books and stuff." Alright, that fills in a hole or two. Sort of. "But things were kind of really, really different. Like, a lot of really basic stuff! I was kind of surprised when everyone was being rude to me. Nobody ever picked on me for, you know." She nods her head upward and her white dog ears twitch. Whoa. Yeah, 'really different' is right. So she didn't even _know_ about... "There were a lot of humans there, but I think mostly it was skin color that people cared about when they did care about stupid things?"

 _"Skin color?_ That makes even _less_ sense. Nobody would divide people up over something _that_ random. How would something like that even start?"

"Well, I have no idea! It had been like that for centuries or probably even longer than that, although who was looking down on who kind of changed a lot depending on the era, I think."

Yeah, okay, Ruby really wasn't far off about how bizarre this is. Speaking of her, her eyes are all narrow from the effort she's putting into trying to grasp the concept. You can't exactly blame her. Annnnd now for the sensitive stuff.

"Ooookay, that's weird and terrifying. You keep using past tense, though. So is Earth gone now, or?"

 _"Yang!"_ Your sister flicks a little wad of napkin at your face. She's got a little pile of them building up as she idly tears off bits and squishes them solid. Her side's already piled up at least a dozen. It's hard to remember who it was, Dad, Qrow, or that one weird friend of his who Dad can't stand, but somebody asked her about it, and she said she did it because it reminded her of the shell casings she leaves lying around all the time. It's pretty adorable.

"Um... yeah. It was sort of... destroyed." Fine, fine, you _are_ guilty about pushing it _now_. You mess with your hair awkwardly and decide to give her some breathing room. Of course this means Ruby has to say something and ruin it. Three, two, one –

"Was it Grimm?" Yep, there it is. She gets away with it by looking really honestly sympathetic, though. The important part is that it takes Jade a little while to answer. You're about to take the silence as a _'yes'_ when she breaks it and things get even more... grim.

"... No, it wasn't."

Suddenly you're sick to your stomach, and it's not just from all the bacon. This time silence ends up answering a question no one wants to ask, because the answer is already painfully obvious.

If Grimm didn't destroy her village, then it means _people_ did. It couldn't even have been during the war, must have been in the last few years. Actually, if she knows so little about the kingdoms, it might even have been as recent as a few months. You really, really want to ask who attacked and why, but... you've probably been selfish enough for one morning.

Honestly, you shouldn't even believe any of this crap. It doesn't make any sense, there are holes everywhere, and there are clearly things she's skimming over... but somehow you do believe her, or at least, you really, really _want_ to. She doesn't exactly have reason to make up things nobody would buy into, she looks like she's only a little better at lying than Ruby is... it's the holes and the skimming that _make_ you think she's telling the truth, or most of it, because every so often she looks _guilty_ about something she said... but not most of it. If she feels guilty covering something up, then it just sorta makes sense that the rest of it's legit.

Well, you're pretty sure _Jade_ believes the stuff she's saying, if nothing else. Then again... with how convincing she's been, it's either all or nothing. If any of this is bull, then the whole thing is.

You 'might' have to take some time later to double-check.

"It was mostly a good place! That's how I always looked at it. There were lots of problems, but I think people did their best anyway, and that's what really matters, right?" You're... not going to answer that. It's rhetorical _and_ you're not totally sure you agree, either. "But everyone's dead now, or almost everyone, it's all just craters and memories."

"... it's weird," she says quietly. "It's been a really long time since the... end, I mean like _years,_  but I keep forgetting that we  _won't_ even be remembered. It's kind of like we never existed in the first place."

 _"That's not true!"_ Agh, volume control, Rubes. Seriously, it's not even noon. "You're still here to remember it all, right?" God, wow, she's _so_ corny even when she's right, and she looks so serious, too. Only one girl could actually pull off a line like that.

"Well, I-I guess that makes sense?"

"Yeah, see? Even if something really sad and terrible happens, there's always someone left who won't _ever_ forget." Her little smile says a lot more, too. Ruby dealt with Mom... better than you, you think, but once in a while, you wonder if there's something you're missing, or something she's holding back. You're almost one hundred percent sure she's not, but what if... Nah, forget it. You don't do _what-ifs_.

"So on a subject that _isn't_ about crushing despair, dead people, and bad memories," Ruby shoots you _another_ look, but you actually think Jade looks pretty relieved to be moving on, "what are you gonna do next?"

She thinks about that for a while. Like, a _while_ -while. It's really, really awkward, but you guess that's just how some things are. The truth is you want to grill this girl on _everything_ , but it's not because you actually care all that much. More than anything else, you're just _bored_ , and that's a _really_ selfish reason to force someone to relive the total annihilation of their village.

"I really... don't know." Huh. There's something in her voice that makes you think she's spent her entire life knowing _exactly_ what she wanted to do, and now that thing is just... missing. _That's_ not creepy or anything. You wonder if that's what Ruby would look like if she couldn't be a Huntress, or you if you couldn't do anything interesting anymore. If this is what that looks like... well, you're not going to let that happen. "But I think I should find somewhere to stay? And a way to earn money, maybe? I've barely ever used normal money before, so that'll be kind of fun..."

What does _that_ mean?

"Oh! I know!" Ruby leans way forward into her personal space. That's pretty much how she is; she's either too shy to know what to do or too excited to remember basic manners. "Soooo, there's a certain store I'm familiar with –" Oh god no why is she doing this, abort, abort.

"Rubes, don't drag anyone _else_ into that –"

" _A certain store I'm familiar with,"_ she repeats, "who might be okay with someone doing temporary work? I think you'd like it, too! You're totally qualified!" ... Is she? Actually, she might be, but the chances of _anybody_ around here hiring a Faunus who doesn't even have recorded work experience aren't so great. "And maybe you could afford to get a new rifle! I bet he'd give an employee discount, too, or maybe a bonus for being awesome, which you totally will be -"

"Oh come on, if that creep ever gives somebody a discount on _anything_ –"

" _Fifty_  Lien says I can make it happen." Oh, she's _serious_ , huh? Twenty is the usual. Fifty's for _big_ stuff. You don't hesitate to answer.

"Deal."

"Also he is so not a creep, you just don't like him because he can smell the _cr_ _iii_ _ime_ on you, like, remember that one time when you came in with me after you'd walked on that patch of grass with the little sign –"

"Um, that would be amazing, thank you!" Oh right, Jade is a thing. And she has great timing!

But that still doesn't solve one problem, even if it works out... You let out a sigh. There's going to be so much drama if you argue with Ruby about what she's inevitably gonna say next, and it's not like you care all that much anyway. Might as well just make it official sooner than later, then.

"You can just crash here for a little while if you have to," you say. "At least until you're on your feet. Then, I don't know. Do whatever you want? Nobody's going to stop you. I mean, that's basically how I live _my_ life."

"Actually..." Now it's tiny fancy dress girl's turn to be weirdly curious, you guess. "What are _you_ two doing with your... well, I guess your lives!" She looks back at Ruby, and _damn_ is she ever twitchy. Didn't Rubes say she was a sniper? Does she just get _in the zone_ when she's holding a gun or something? "You said something about being a huntress? Or maybe it was _Huntress_ with a capital H? Does that mean hunting animals, or..." She shrugs nervously, and you yawn and get up to go do... something, whatever, anything but listen to the four thousand word cascade that's about to explode out of your little sister's mouth.

"Alrighty, I've got things to do." You don't, you really don't, although you do need to like, actually decide on what today is even for and then do it. So you'll _have_ things to do. "You take it from here."

Back in your room, it's time to think a little. _God,_ you can hear her _through the wall_. You can even make out a word here and there. This is not gonna make it easy to think clearly. You slip on Ember Celica and try to think of any other leads to follow. Ruby's soon-to-be noise complaint is really, really not helping.

You can't afford to screw today up. Maybe you're being paranoid and maybe you're not, but you have some questions about all of this weirdness that you'll be asking a real different sort of person. One who, uh, probably isn't gonna be happy to see you again, now or ever. Well, if he wants to hold a grudge over his guys being useless, that's his business. You already know from experience that if things get rough, you won't be the one paying for it, and you don't really feel like dropping any deeper into the criminal underworld than you already have.

Kind of slowly and furtively, your eyes drift back to your bed. Okay, it's not entirely fair to blame the preoccupation on her ranting, that doesn't actually change much at all. There was no way you could have kept a clear head today in the first place.

A doorway to nowhere, curled horns, and a devil's smile made sure of _that._


	11. Lucid Greetings (2)

_when we were strangers, i would believe_

_i was walking in my sleep_

_we were strangers when i believed_

_i could wake up from this dream_

 

[the birthday massacre - diaries](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vEfZSs45CSI)

 

* * *

RWBY

NJKA

 **-** (  **E** ) **-**

* * *

**50 days prior to Beacon**

 

_It's night again, Mistral choked by shadows that wind like serpents through every dismal slum street, smothering alleys and strays alike, the moon's broken profile a sickly eye eternally mocking those who have lost everything and those who never had anything at all._

_Mocking_ you. _Curled in a hilariously bleak little corner, striking up matches from a discarded box, swallowing tears as the little traces of dust left at the tip of each only give up sparks, motes of sickly light that melt away in an instant. Just_ one _and you might have an echo of warmth. Just one, and the pile of trash you've gathered could ignite, a tiny flame rising from the refuse that makes up your life._

_Please, just one..._

_But there is no 'just one,' and you stare at dim sticks of thin, broken wood, cover your shoulders with an old torn-up shirt scavenged from behind an old torn-up shop, and the makeshift, undersized blanket almost helps. Almost. If it had done nothing, then_ fine. _Let it be that way. But this, like those lost sparks, this 'almost' is colder and crueler than nothing at all, so you sit there, aimless, sobbing quietly into crossed arms._

_The night is long. The night is cold. The night goes on forever, and you know that even when the sun rises, this endless night will still hold you in its whispers and despair._

_You almost scream when you hear the sharp impact of something against wood, only feet away from your head, invisible in the sea of blackness. Thunk. Thunk. Again._

 

 _Thunk. Thunk._ Thunk.

 

What _is_ this? There wasn't a door here. There was _never_ a door standing in the middle of this hellhole as if you could have just reached out and opened it, stepped into a better life. This isn't at all what you remember. This isn't how this nightmare goes.

Are you _yourself_ , all of a sudden? This isn't a little girl's body. It's just... yours. These clothes belong to you, not to that pathetic thing that was you so long ago. When you stand up, the frozen ghost of a child stays behind, paused in memory. You do your best not to look.

Thunk. Thunk. Thunk. What is this _door?_ The wood is deep green marred by charred pits and ash, and the doorknob is a glittering jewel that's familiar to the point that you're kind of insulted by your own subconscious. Is this seriously how unsubtle you are on the inside?

You open the door, if only because there's nothing else to do but stand around staring at a freeze-frame of your own nightmare, and that doesn't exactly sound like a great way to kill time.

"Hello! Mind if I come in?"

Outside there's... nothing. Nothing forever as far as you can see, a blackness darker than Mistral's nights, darker than Grimm. That and a girl in a strange dress, ram horns curled up on her head, with a smile like a cheerful little angel of death.

Before you know it, you've mumbled something that she seems to take as a yes, and suddenly you're face to face with a complete stranger. She can't be real. No one in the world has a grin like that. The closest thing you can compare it with is Cinder's, but that's still not right, because Cinder always seems to be smiling for reasons no one else can really understand, and this girl's expression is... _pure_ in a way you've never seen in your life, remorselessly honest. It speaks so clearly she might as well literally be talking. _I might eat you alive and never look back if I feel like it, or I might risk my life to pull you from a burning building and tell you everything's going to be okay. I just might go ahead and do both._

Finally you decide that you absolutely _have_ to be looking at someone who isn't real. You don't think somebody like her _can_ be real.

"What... _are_ you?" Your voice is strangely thin and raspy, like it's hoarse and wounded from breathing ash and smoke. If this stupid little ghost of a memory of a nightmare is still enough to do _this_ to you...

"I'm pretty bored, mostly! How about you?"

"... You have _got_ to know that's not what I meant." The girl... Faunus?... _thing_ shrugs and takes a look around at... oh right. The memory of a little girl, weak, stupid, untempered. Someone you killed a long, long time ago. "I don't think it's possible for someone who looks like you to exist, so _what the hell are you?"_

She giggles and you wonder if lucid dreaming means you can punch her in the face without anything stupid happening.

"Yeah, I get that a lot. And anyway, isn't it obvious?" The girl sits down on a patch of empty air that's just a bit too high to let her feet reach the ground, swinging her legs back and forth beneath a tattered gray skirt. "I'm a visitor in your dream!" She yawns and stretches her arms, then frowns. "This body is so _weird_. Is this really how all of you feel all the time? Even the joints and muscles are aaaall wrong."

You were pissed off before, but that's starting to crack and fall away; this just got really creepy, as if it wasn't creepy enough from the start. And then she tilts her head curiously, looking past you, and it hits you that she must be looking at... that _child._ To hell with being _creeped out_ , being angry is better than being _scared_ , and anyway, _Cinder_ comes off as creepy all the time, and it's not like _she's_ ever hurt you. She does have a temper sometimes, when someone screws up, and you're definitely not perfect, but she doesn't _want_ to... Everyone gets frustrated and slips up _sometimes_. She's not perfect either, even if she's probably as close to it as anybody can be.

"How about you stop staring at that kid and get to the point?"

"What point? Is there a point right now? I told you, I'm just bored, so I'm... _visiting_ people."

"In their _dreams._ Sure you are, because _that_ makes sense."

She doesn't actually answer, too busy examining every detail of this _mess._ You wonder if she can hear the sound of your teeth grating, or if that's just you. Then she turns back from the whole scene and smiles at you. It's not the same this time, though. The scales seem like they're tipped more toward the _'pull you from a_ _burning building_ _'_ side, if not by much, if only by the weight of a pinch of silt.

"Wow, your subconscious is really depressing!", she says brightly. "Was this a daymere or something before I came in?"

"A... what?" She must mean nightmare, but then why would... damn. Now that you think about it, it _was_ three in the afternoon when you finally caved in and fell asleep. She knows. She _must_ know, or that wouldn't make any sense. "Actually, forget that. I just want to know one thing."

"That sounds like an underestimation, but go for it!"

"Are you just in my head?" Woooow, talk about smooth; set yourself up to sound stupid and that's exactly what'll happen, Em. Maybe someday you'll actually remember that. "Or _are_ you real somehow?"

"Oh, we're both definitely in your head right now." Leaning forward on her invisible seat, she sets her elbows above her knees and rests her chin on steepled fingers. "So hey, do you mind if I do something? It won't affect _your_ dream, if you're worried about that."

"I don't care what you do. You're either some part of my mind or you're..." Or she's what? You're not just going to ask if she's some kind of spirit or dream god. "If you're sticking around, do you at least have a name I can remember to hate?"

The girl whistles, her wide eyesopening a little more, those huge red irises so much like yours even if the shade itself is different, eyes that are practically weapons by default and are _definitely_ weapons if you want them to be.

"That sure is some blunt solicitation right there! I'm not really looking for a pitch fling, though, sorry! Plus, you're a little too cute to hate right now, to be honest~" Great, that made no sense... how was that _flirting?_ "But you can just call me Aradia. Aradia Megido, at your service!" She punctuates the sentence with an obnoxious wink. Maybe you _will_ try punching her in the face. Or, you know, maybe she's a terrifying dream monster and she might retaliate by eating your soul or something.

"Emerald," you say, without even meaning to, and for some reason you keep talking like you're her verbal mirror. "Emerald Sustrai."

"Ooh, pretty ~...I like it! Oh yeah, you said you didn't care what I do, right?"

All of a sudden you _really, really_ regret running your mouth without thinking first. Aradia stretches again, popping her back deep and hard before she...

Flexes her shoulder muscles and shuts her eyes in relief, hemorrhaging rusty light like bleeding fireworks as glittering, transparent butterfly wings burst out from her back, red and smooth and flitting around at random. All you can do is stare in growing anxiety, because you're having a hard time believing your brain cooked up stuff like _this_ , and that means... well, you don't even want an answer to what that means.

"Ohh, that's nice," she sighs, sweeping her wings back and forth with more strength behind the motion. "I think I sorta miss these things. Thanks for giving me a dream to grow them in! Usually I don't even get the chance." _Usually?_

"No problem... I think?"

"So yeah! I just like keeping an eye on interesting people, you know? These humans and Faunus are pretty new to me," _what, what the_ _hell_ _does_ _THAT_ _mean,_ "and people never got boring even before I showed up here. You, Miss Emerald, look like the exact opposite of boring to me! I mean, this dream is really, really well made, you must be _great_ at visualizing and imagining things in a concrete sense." Well, she's not _wrong..._ "Oh, by the way, is that you over there in the corner?"

And all it takes is one sentence to bring the whole thing crashing down.

"You know what?" You wish you were sitting down just so you could stand up dramatically, because forget everything, forget caution and curiosity, you are _not_ going to take that kind of rudeness from anybody. _"_ _I'm_ standing right _here_ , I don't have to just _let you interrogate me,_ and I'm getting real sick of your weird cryptic evil spirit crap, so how about you _get the hell out_ _?"_

Her shoulders droop, and so do her wings, but she doesn't really stop smiling. Why does that make you feel... no, it's not _guilt_ , but...

"Okay, okay, if that's what you want! You don't have be _rude_ about it." She steps carefully off of the nothingness that was supporting her and walks back to that stupid door. "I might drop by again later, though! I hope you'll let me in."

"Don't hold your breath." Her hand opens and a nasty little _something_ crawls down your spine. You just watch as little semi-pudgy fingers tipped with sharp rust-painted nails close around the jeweled doorknob, and for some reason, when she turns it to actually open the door, your stomach turns upside down right along with it. Everything feels wrong and weird and shaky, which turns out to be because, well... _your body_ is shaking. The door swivels smoothly open and something small and terrible in you wants you to reach out, to say something, anything, to say _wait, don't go..._

But you can't listen to that thing. It lies and it drags you down and it hides in the blackened alleyways of your mind, striking matches like an idiot who thinks that means anything at all. You _can't listen,_ you _can't_ turn back, you can't –

"See you later! I hope you're in a better mood next time. It's really dark and peaceful in here."

"... don't..." why does it feel like you're being smothered in ashes? lungs burning eyes about to water and your ears are ringing and please –

"You're a fun place to hang out, Emerald~!" And she steps into the endless void with one casual wave, pulling the door shut behind her, wood and jewel immediately melting away into sparks that are both rust-red and a bright, shining green.

"... go," you finally say, hoarse and strange, the quiet sound disappearing into the shadows.

You swallow, slap yourself in the face, grimace, sit down in one of the few sort-of-clean spots left in this frozen nightmare where everything's gone so incredibly silent. _Great at visualizing and imagining things in a concrete sense,_ huh. Yeah. Too great, maybe. Too bad you only know how to make it stop again when you're doing it to somebody else. For now all you can do is lean back against rough cold brickwork, looking anywhere but at that little figure in the dark, and as you wait and wait and wait and wait to wake up, you realize something that covers your thoughts with static.

Someone found you in a _real-_ _life_ nightmare once, a woman with the devil's smile and a fire to light the way through the darkness... But the one thing she never could do, never _tried_ to do but that's okay because you need to be _strong_ to be _sharp_ to be able to burn your _own_ demons to _grow up already,_ but... but you still wish...

But you look at yourself in the dank and sticky blackness of midnight in Mistral's slums, the you of today and the you who wasn't even ten years old, and you wish... you wish you could have the faith and devotion to stomp out this infuriating cycle of nights, that the presence of Cinder Fall in your heart was enough. You wish... ha. Who are you trying to fool? You have absolutely no idea what you wish, not even a little bit. You don't. You really don't.

... Yes, you do. You know damn well who it is you're trying to fool.

All you wish after these long, grating nightmares is that something, someone, _anyone,_ could tear you away from the past you're too weak to discard, to shake you by the shoulder and wake you up, to save you from your memories the same way Cinder saved you from yourself.

That's all you can manage to wish for now, and when you suddenly  _actually_ _met_ _that someone_ you told her to get the hell out... and you were unlucky enough that the second devil in your life didn't see fit to stop you from throwing her away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh hello there subplot how you doin


	12. Inverse Philosophy (3)

_in the darkness where the angels cry_

_"give us water, give us back our eyes"_

_our bed's this concrete floor_

_and it's all we have left to live for_

 

[alkaline trio – we've had enough](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDVtTvB_tjw)

 

* * *

RW **B** Y

NJKA

* * *

  **30 days prior to Beacon**

 

By the time you're even close to your destination, there's no denying it anymore: this girl is genuinely insane. Most of what she says makes no sense. Half of the most basic facts of life are just... _not there,_ and in their place is some kind of cheerful nightmare philosophy, a confusing, merciless, nihilistic innocence. Just hearing the 'logic' behind some of her thoughts makes you... ugh.

The way she talks about killing like it's _nothing_ sends hissing chills down your spine. At first you thought of _him_ , but no, this is different; he was (is) lost in bitterness and hate and contradiction, and this girl simply does not understand why there's anything wrong with ending another sentient life, why it wouldn't be the natural and expected response to any kind of threat.

She doesn't _want_ to kill anyone, but she doesn't mind it in the least, either. There's no passion, for better and for worse. You'd think she was a sociopath, but there's genuine empathy there too; it's been a long walk, and she's so clearly _not..._ how do you phrase it, even to yourself?

Nepeta Leijon is not a monster, and that scares you more than anything else. You don't _want_ to think that someone with her attitude could be anything _but_ a monster, and yet here she is, proving you wrong or at least making your uncertain world even less clear.

The way she _speaks_ is also throwing you off; you'd swear she can't go more than a few sentences without slipping in some kind of cat or fish pun as if it comes completely naturally to her. She isn't even trying to be funny. This is honestly the way she communicates. She's so accustomed to it that it's second nature.

You're not sure you've ever met a Faunus outside the White Fang who was so openly _proud_ of her heritage, if that's even what this is; she seems to look at everyone in the same way, with curiosity and a good-natured moment to consider whether or not they're _'purrey'_. As far as you can tell, "friend" and "prey" are the only two ways she can view other people.

All the fish stuff is throwing you off, too. If it was just the cat puns, you could fabricate something resembling an explanation, but it's not, and it's really not always just fish, either, sometimes it's a whole mess of surreal nautical substitutions. There are people who are mysterious and then there are people who don't even seem paw – possible. She's managing to be both at once.

Sometimes you think you see something _off_ in her eyes. Not just metaphorically, either, and even though they're the same steady olive at every glance, when she's only in the periphery of your vision, you'd all but swear there are glints of something else.

Low-class neighborhoods run lower and lower until they can't honestly be called anything but slums, and, surprise surprise, the worse it gets the more Faunus you see and the less humans, just like everywhere else in this world. All you have to do to find your kind is look for affluence and then start walking in the opposite direction.

Hardlight posts flicker in and out when they function at all, glitched and ugly without proper maintenance. The itchy dirty stink of cheap, impure dust fills the air. Battered shirts, dresses, pants, towels, all hang from lines in cramped front and back 'yards,' waiting for the daylight to excise every droplet of water; if someone could afford the luxury of dust-drying their clothes they sure as hell wouldn't be living _here._ And everywhere you look, glances of suspicion, some of which turn to an accepting sort of confusion when their owners smell the lack of humanity on you and let down their guard. Not nearly every Faunus can tell each other apart from humans without a visual indication, which you think is both a very good thing and a very bad thing. After a bit more walking, you accept that you've made it deep enough into this territory to take a small risk, slipping the bow off your head. No human would be caught dead around here.

You let out a long, accidental sigh of relief; hopefully you'll get used to this, but right now your ears are stiff and sensitive from hours of binding, aching when they twitch and wiggle in the open air.

"So what's up with the bow, anyway?" She cocks her head in confusion while you stare back, trying to process the question, and then you realize it's _another_ pun. Of course she'd pronounce it like the bow of a _ship_. Somehow you manage not to groan out loud. "It must not be very fin to keep your ears all tied up and stuff."

It really never ends, does it? She _never stops doing_ _this_ _._ Is that frustrating, concerning, or kind of adorable?... okay, it's all of those things. A few more hours of this and you'll have either gone insane or stopped noticing altogether.

"I'm going to be spending a lot of time around humans," you say, trying to swallow the anxiety that comes just from saying it out loud, "and I don't need any extra attention, or anyone trying to start trouble, or..." A tired shrug. "You can probably understand _that_."

The look on her face says very clearly that she can't.

"That doesn't make _any_ sense. It's almast like you're ashamed of yourself for some reason. I mean, if somemoby picks a fight, you can just –"

"If you're about to say 'kill them,' please just _don't_ ," you groan, and she pouts.

"Fine, you don't have to _k_ _r_ _ill_ them, but can't you at least claw out their eyes or something? If someone pushes you, you need to make sure they can't ever do it again, right?"

By the time you realize you've stopped walking, which might have been two seconds ago or ten, she's noticed it too; she's just standing in the street now, waiting for a response. Your mouth's gone dry enough you're amazed you aren't choking on your tongue. Nepeta's confused at first – that makes two of you – and then... is that _concern?_

"Are you... clawlright?" She frowns. "That one was terrible," muttered under her breath. "I mean..."

 _I'm fine,_ you say, except that you don't say it. Somehow, the signal from your brain just isn't reaching anything else. It's getting lost in a journey through things you've already resolved to bury and never dig up.

She clears her throat and suddenly she's looking very intently at anything that isn't you. Is she... wait, is she _blushing?_ Whatever. This is okay. You can do this. Nothing is even _happening,_ so why do you feel so sick to your stomach?

"I'm fine," you say, and it comes out sticky and unconvincing, but apparently it's good enough for her.

 

* * *

 

There are two kinds of markings to watch for in areas like this. Three claw lines in white means... well, you're staying clear of those from now on. One claw line crossing another at an angle means something much, much less dangerous. A trail of those takes you through an unassuming door in the side of an unassuming little building, past a curtain masking an open passageway, through a winding corridor, and into a ramshackle complex of furtively linked buildings and cellars.

"This is a sort of shelter," you say. "Faunus with nowhere to stay can sometimes find places like this. They'll take in refugee villagers, sometimes even petty criminals with warrants out of proportion to what they've done, and give them a place to sleep, even food when things are going well. A few groups of us try to run places like this, mostly through donations and volunteer work."

"But if it costs them so much, why do it when they're not even furriends?"

"Because they _want_ to? Because they _care?"_ You snap at her, you can't help yourself. She's finally starting to make you regret trying to reach out.

"Oh," she says, with a look on her face that says she's doing some thinking. After a long moment that's apparently only tense for you, she smiles. "That's kind of nice! You couldn't reely do that stuff back home. It would be a furry good way to get culled before you knew what was catpunning." There's a faint melancholy there somewhere. Has her life taught her that more that the slightest bit of compassion is a risk?... And there's an extra bit of red in her cheeks, too.

"Are you... _embarrassed_ that you think it's okay to take care of strangers?"

You drop the topic when she flushes so hard that you'd think someone just walked in on her naked, sighing and shaking your head. Why are you going to all this trouble for a psychotic stranger, again? ( _Because she's alone because_ _her life sounds even worse than yours because_ _you're alone too because_ _maybe this time it's not too late to –)_

While she ponders, you tune in to something else; a few key words later and you can't help but eavesdrop on bits of a hushed conversation between two people seated next to each other on a thin carpet, staring at a single scroll they're probably very lucky to have.

"... ang, but they'll say it was them anyway, even _with_ the calling card... They don't put _that_ on the news. Maybe if they did, somebody would've _caught_ her already."

"And now the rest of us look even worse, as usual. I heard it was some big-time SDC executive. _That's_ gonna build up to another crackdown in Atlas, if it hasn't already. The younger daughter even gave a speech at the funeral. Closed casket. I mean, obviously."

"Yeah, you don't parade that in front of the _family_... honestly, I think I wish I hadn't looked for this photo leak. I mean, I can't decide if it would be _more_ or _less_ horrible if a Semblance really did that."

"Are you kidding me? _Way_ more horrible. Can you even begin to imagine the kind of person you'd have to be to have a Semblance capable of... _god._ I'm not even sure I _understand_ what happened there, but could _anyone_ deserve that? I'd rather be eaten by _Grimm._ "

"Yeah, at least real monsters don't murder people just for _Lien_..."

"Do we actually know for sure that she's _real?_ Or a she at all? If there's ever been a security record of her, _that_ never got leaked. Isn't it just eye-witness accounts from... like... the few people who _didn't_ die in those assassinations?"

"Can you even call someone an assassin when their method is 'kill everyone within two thousand feet of the target?' That's more like the living equivalent of an Atlesian bombing run..."

"I thought there was no chance it could really be just one person and not some sort of _team_ , but that was before I started paying attention to the Vytal Festival tournaments. Now I might actually _believe_ that crazy rumor that she's still a teenager..."

You force yourself to stop listening when you notice Nepeta is doing it too, and worse, she looks like she's about to walk over there and start asking questions. There could probably be a less ideal time for that, but if so, you don't know what it could be.

"So," you say, and she snaps to attention. _Thank god._ "About the weapon you wanted... We should figure out what to do about that before it gets too late at night."

"... diurnal mammals are so _weird_ ," she mumbles to herself. You somehow resist the urge to rub at your temples. This is literally giving you a headache.

Two repurposed houses and a small donation later (you didn't actually do that part because you _had_ to, regardless of the way it'll help smooth everything over), the two of you are technically outside the legal boundaries of the shelter complex and _inside_ a room with semi-hidden weapon racks. You ask yourself again why you're willing to pay for this.

Unlike most of the things you ask yourself, you actually know the answer.

_'It feels gross and weird walking around unarmed like this.'_

You agreed then and you agree now.

(Also, you're mildly concerned she might kill someone to get the money herself.)

Hopefully they have something close to whatever it is she's skilled with. It might be some kind of wristblades, given the terrifying improvised _Grimm-bone_ weapons she was using out in Forever Fall. You have a sinking feeling that you know exactly what the answer is, though, just based off of her personality...

You'll talk to the people in charge and she can go look at various weapons. They're all simple ones, mostly single-function, but that's a lot better than nothing. There is absolutely nothing that could possibly go wrong with this simple plan.

Five minutes later, you're astonished to realize that _nothing went wrong with that simple plan._ That was almost a bitter joke you told yourself, but... no, somehow it's fine. Maybe she isn't a lost cause. Then you look at what she's picked out.

You knew this was coming. It was _so_ obvious. Your dignity was just holding out hope that you might be wrong. You _knew_ it, but you still can't stop yourself from groaning into your palm, because it's _claws._ It's an old pair set of basic gloves and bracers with retractable claw blades. At least they're cheap. There's a silver lining in that, right? Right. Take what you can get right now, Blake. That is how you stay sane through things like this. Let yourself just be happy about the small things.

Through some _very_ hushed whispers in an empty, adjacent rooms, you get her to agree to one incredibly crucial thing: you'll help out with this on the condition that she doesn't kill _anyone,_ Faunus or human, as anything but an absolute last resort, and even then to think twice and then think _another_ two times before doing it. She grumbles a bit and says you're "not her _[_ _?_ _???_ _]_ ," confirming as far as you're concerned that she lived somewhere so bizarre that some of her vernacular literally does not exist anywhere else on the planet, but she does go along with it in the end.

Luckily, there are enough free spots that you both get to sleep indoors in a safe part of Vale tonight. It takes a long, long time before you manage to fall asleep, but your ears tell you it takes her even longer.

There's something painfully amusing about a stray taking in a stray.

 

* * *

RWBY

 **N** JKA

* * *

 

_A jungle night, silent, clam... to creatures that don't know how to listen. To a huntress, the brush, trees, and vines all sing out the scents and sounds of more purrey than you could ever need. The question isn't whether you'll find food here in your own front yard. The question is what hunt will be the most fun._

_Except... you don't remember a door standing in the middle of nothing, and someone's knocking._

Ooooh, pretty~! It's all deep green and olive and the handle's carved into little fuchsia fishies. For a secod you're caught off guard feeling at your neck for gills that aren't there. You guess it's beclaws they technically weren't yours to begin with, but you don't like it one bit. Then again, you're probably – _she's_ probubbly somewhere else right now, eeling weird to be without a tail, so... No, that's sad, too.

Thunk. Thunk. Thunk. Oh right! Wait. _Wait wait wait wait._ That can't be – _is that –?_

"Long time no ocular registration! It took forever to find you, you know~! You're lucky your sign's on the outside of your door, kitty-cat. Mind if I come –"

You have to drag her through befur you can pounce on her, but it still works out juuust fin.

 

* * *

RW **B** Y

NJKA

* * *

  **29 days prior to Beacon**

 

Your eyes snap open to a certain Faunus sitting _right next to you_ looking straight down at your face, and against all odds, you're able to stop yourself from instantly dodging out of your shadow and launching an attack from a different angle.

"Hey," she says brightly, as if what follows is somehow reasonable, "do you know what a scroll is and how I could hunt one down? There's an app I _reely_ need access to!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whale it's aboat time fur a bit of plot purrogress


	13. Let Tensions Evolve (3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Way late, been busy with various life stuff, and also I made an amateur RWBY AMV. Check it out if you want, or don't! S'all good.  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XdTG1QTIXGY

_living in a cruel world_

_trudging with my feet in the snow_

_on a day out, and it's a night now_

_doctor, i've been walking by the side of the road_

_for a long time, and i'm going out of my mind_

 

[porter robinson – hear the bells](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=capV8asfWnc)

 

* * *

R **W** BY

NJKA

* * *

  **24** **days prior to Beacon**

 

Winter isn't here anymore. Father hasn't bothered to pay you any attention, which is certainly a stroke of fortune. Mother you can't count on, Whitley you'd rather avoid, and Klein... you don't think you'll be able to look him in the eye again anytime soon. It's _best_ to be alone right now, to not be seen by anyone apart from your own reflection, that empty face... like a stranger's in the mirror, like a _monster's_ warped and leering from Myrtenaster's polished surface.

It's best that no one sees how much time you've spent, lately, staring into the blade of your own sword as though it were something bearing a curse. You suppose that, at least, it is _wielded_ by something bearing a curse.

How few days has it been since the funeral now? Standing there like a proper figurehead and biting off pretty words by rote when your head was filled with fantasies of watching that assassin filth choke on her own blood – whatever she looks like; how that's still a government secret is a marvel to you – and here you are immediately distracting yourself, of course. How _easy._ How like you, to continue trying to take the _easy_ way out, even inside your own head.

How very _like_ who you've become, a girl who can prick her finger on a tool for cleaning weapons and almost vomit at the sight of the tiny crimson flower left on her worktable by a single drop of blood.

You have to adapt, to get used to this concept. The word 'kill' means so much more when you've come an inch away from forcefully applying it to another person, even a psychopath who'd _pull a sword out of her shoulder_ and try to keep fighting – her _shoulder!_ For all you know, she's a chalk outline on a tiled floor right now, even if you called for medical assistance.

 _She_ provoked _you._ _She_ was the one at fault. It's _not_ wrong for you to stand up for yourself and your name, and it's not _your_ fault that her aura was depleted, even if you can't imagine _why._ You weren't even the first to _strike._

But it was the bitter, sarcastic, antagonistic Faunus girl who ripped a blade out of god knows how many muscles and veins, dyeing a white floor red and _still standing_ until her body couldn't take it any longer, and it was the dignified, nearly uninjured, honorable Schnee heiress who placed an anonymous tip with her scroll, gingerly held her sword like it might burn her skin, turned, and _ran._

No, that's not right. You also _wasted time writing a note_ when someone was _dying on the floor in front of you_ from a wound _you_ gave her. This isn't how things were supposed to be. It's what you always knew you would have to do _regardless_ of your profession, something you thought you _wanted_ to do, but this just can't be... this _isn't what you wanted_.

 _'Then what_ did _you think you wanted?'_

"How should I know," you mumble to yourself, and then suddenly it's too much. "How _should_ I know? _How could I POSSIBLY_ _know_ _that_ _?!"_

Seven years worth of bad luck might be a problem for some people, but your fist has earned you hundreds over _your_ last seven years alive, so why worry over a few more? Beyond that, aura can take care of a lot when a wound is already quickly treated. Your knuckles haven't so much as _scarred._

Blood running down a broken mirror. How humiliatingly poetic. How disgustingly _correct._

The actual blood you'll clean up on your own, and the rest you'll just leave to the maids. Housekeeping is already more than used to sweeping up broken glass in your room, and even if someone bothered to tell Father, all he would do is replace it and subtract the cost from your allowance. That and... _look_ at you. Just _stare,_ stare right through you, disgusted by your idiot seventeen-year-old antics. It's all he does, now; crush you with a look and drop your spirit with a few words like bullets to the chest.

You think you'd prefer it if he would just go back to beating you, instead.

 

* * *

  **19** **days prior to Beacon**

 

The amount of time the two of you spend staring at each other in disbelief simply has to be record-breaking in at least _one_ kingdom.

"You can't be serious. This is _absurd._ Are you _stalking_ me? Do you just _live in public restrooms?_ "

"I'm pretty sure that I could ask you the same question."

Yes, you're definitely cursed. Nothing else could explain this kind of repeated coincidence. This must be punishment for crimes in some past life. Maybe the world is taking its anger at Father out on you instead. What's the difference?

Can she see how hard you swallow? Does she wonder why you haven't even drawn your weapon? She certainly has her own, though it looks... different, now, more compact in its collapsed form. Higher quality metals, you suppose, because you doubt someone who wields a _chainsaw_ is interested in actually reducing the weight of the crass thing.

You won't take a step back no matter how badly you want to, and you won't let yourself stare at the stiff way she moves her left arm but what else is there to stare at? Well, there might be a couple of things, but those really aren't any better. Sharp, icy fingers are wrapping all around your insides. Steps on tile, one after another. Sometimes you used to wonder if your whole life was a dream. If you were right, then this must be a dream within a dream.

"What is it that you even _want_ from me?"

She answers by punching you in the face.

Are Faunus stronger than humans, or is she just an inexplicable juggernaut with the body of a graceful teen? That's not how _you_ fight, and even if you're shorter, the ratios here just don't seem to make sense. You'd think her an artisan or _model_ before _warrior_ , and somehow the lattermost is the reality.

Maybe you should be focusing on standing up again, but even through your aura, a blow to the chin with that much strength has left you rattled and dazed. She looks down at you like you're... actually, you have no idea what that expression means. You expected anger, contempt, ranting, anything. You'd never have thought that green eyes could _burn_ , but more importantly, what's _stoking_ that flame?

Your mind is starting to work properly again – _maybe –_ and it does nothing to help the situation. She reaches into a well-hidden skirt pocket, plucks out a white envelope, removes a slip of paper.

"As recompense for undeserved mercy," she says, a smirk starting to form on olive-glossed lips as your eyes begin to widen in fury, "the chainsaw-wielding bat Faunus who has been handily defeated now owes one (1) favor to Weiss Schnee of the Schnee Dust Company." Her left hand opens with just a twitch of what must be pain, and the slip drifts into your lap like a giant flake of snow. It occurs to you, in a dull and pointless way, that you're both left-handed.

"What..."

" _Someone_ needed to do it sooner or later, so I thought I'd do you a favor and get it over with." That smirk is wide enough to show teeth that seem just a bit too sharp. "Shall we call it even and move on with our lives?"

No part of you is prepared to process this. Shouldn't she want _real_ vengeance? You nearly _killed_ her.

_you nearly killed her._

"... _Fine,_ " you spit, before licking instinctively at the slight split in your lip that's already half-healed. "But if I see you again –"

"You'll kill me?" She's entirely serious, and if there's anything on her face apart from that maddening smugness, it's simply _curiosity._ "Am I wrong? Perhaps you will be satisfied with only maiming me? If you can manage the task against someone with aura, that is."

It's strangely difficult to speak.

"I'm going to take that as a 'no.'" On her way out, she stops and turn to face you one more time, and you _know_ she just flipped her hair on purpose, it's quite literally not long enough to happen any other way. "Kanaya."

"Excuse me?" She rolls her eyes at that.

"Kanaya Maryam. In my distant, uncouth homeland, that is what we savages refer to as a 'name.' I guess you're not familiar with the concept. A shame, really." Her deep purple skirt, almost but not quite black, swishes overdramatically as she makes her exit proper. Damn her for getting the last word.

Although, the real shame is a skirt that nice being wasted on _that_ unbearable creature, even if the thing _is_ fitted extremely well. You think it might look even better ripped into shreds. Why is it that all the attractive women you meet have to be so unreasonably _abrasive?_

"... _hmph._ " She must have hit you even harder than you'd realized; your thoughts still aren't making any sense at all. You pluck the note from your lap in irritation, idly turning it over in your hands, only to freeze when you find writing on the _back_ in someone else's infuriatingly elegant script. For a moment you're confused; you expected gloating, a passing jab, but there's just a series of digits... oh. A series of digits. Is that what you... yes. Yes, it's _exactly_ what you think it is.

There's no one around to see the flush in your cheeks, but you manage to be humiliated anyway.

 

* * *

 RWBY

NJ **K** **A**

* * *

  **19** **days prior to Beacon**

 

 ****gravenAdvisor (GA) opened relay with  affableAnnihilation (AA)

 

GA: Guess Who Seems To Live In Every Communal Ablution Block In Atlas

AA: nooo way seriously?

GA: Against All Odds And Logic Yes

GA: Im Not Sure If Its Amazing Luck Or The Worst Luck Possible

AA: its always more fun that way

AA: so how did it go ladyculler

GA: I Punched Her In The Face And Gave Her My Number

AA: you big slut

AA: good for you! :D


	14. The Incredible Mr. Gun (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woooo! Finally able to get my head to focus on more than one project at once to some degree, so here we go.
> 
> IF YOU HAVE PREVIOUSLY READ THIS FIC, PLEASE READ THE NEXT BIT, WHETHER OR NOT YOU'RE THE ONE BEING ADDRESSED.
> 
> To the comment-person going by Red: again, seriously, thank you so much for the constructive criticism. Like, really. It's helped *a lot.* As a result of contemplating some stuff you said:
> 
> We have some "[X] days until Beacon" bits stuck all over the fic now, for one thing. For another thing, Jade actually DOES mention that it's been years since Earth was destroyed, if briefly. And for yet another thing, well, Yang's inner monologue now reflects a coming chapter I'd never intended to write that will be really fun and serve several vital purposes.
> 
> Other stuff:
> 
> After a lot of re-reads of the fic, I've made one other notable edit: Kanaya is a little bit less brutal late in her first POV segment in chapter 6. Still more brutal than is typical for her, but I did end up feeling like I'd overdone what I was aiming for, and I like it better pulled back just a bit (she comes off more like someone *trying* to be ruthless and not entirely succeeding, which I definitely prefer after comparing both versions of those two paragraphs).
> 
> ... jeez, I'm actually not sure how I'm going to properly implement some of this on ff.net, given how the document manager crap works. Probably gonna take a day or two to see if there's any way to pull that off without literally re-typing entire chapters; I really shouldn't have done my last-minute editing inside the uploaded file... aaaaaaaahhhhhhhh whyyyy
> 
> One nice thing: as much as the story will always be hopping around viewpoints, and it'll be a little longer before chapters stop Tarantino-ing all over the timeline... FINALLY OUT OF THE 'RUNNING FOUR STORY ARCS AT ONCE' NIGHTMARE ZONE. I have rarely felt so free.

_i never thought i'd go this far_

_without a star to cross the seas_

_so far from shores i'd left behind_

_still far from shores i've yet to reach_

 

[vnv nation - homeward](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glfH5c_1hYE)

 

* * *

 **R** WBY

NJKA

* * *

**29 days prior to Beacon**

**Afternoon**

 

If you had any doubts about Jade being completely new here, they are _so gone._ Now that it's daylight and people are around she can actually see the city of Vale when it's, you know, being a city and not a... city at night? When it's normal, maybe – no 'cause it's normal for it to be night sometimes, so – maybe when it's more _active?_ Anyway!

She looks like she wants to get a good long look at _everything_ and you almost have to, like, restrain her? Not literally but still! You can relate to that, although her over-excitedness doesn't look like what you think _you_ look like when you're super excited. She thinks Vale is awesome – _understandably_ – and you end up answering all kinds of little questions about things you... really never would've thought you'd get asked by someone older than eight, and some of them by anyone ever, and some of them are simple and some of them are suddenly about stuff like _actual science and_ _physics_ and sadly not everything is a gun so you can't really help with that!

... Whoa, it would be weird if _everything_ was a gun. Weird, but also awesome. What if _you_ were a gun? Would guns use bullets to talk to each other or would that still be for fighting? This needs more exploration. _You are writing this down when you get home, so help you god._

 _You're_ totally fine, but you think that Jade might actually be a little exhausting to hang out with for most people? She just has so much _enthusiasm_ about everything! This morning things were so _different._ Is she just bad at being around more than one person at once? Because that was really sad but now you think she's been smiling for a whole hour – _doesn't that hurt her face?_ How much smiling practice does Jade _have?!_ – and staying on track to get to the shop is hard when she's running around like an adorable excited puppy.

Wait, was that bad to think? Like, she _is_ part dog, sort of, so would that make it _cute_ or _offensive?_ It'd be easier if she wasn't totally foreign to the idea of humans discriminating against faunus, but she is, so even if she had an answer it might not apply to everything?

You think maybe you'd rather do some research on your scroll later.

Oh dang you're getting a little bit close now and suddenly you're really nervous, thanks for nothing, _Yang_. If your dumb sister's attitude makes Jade feel weird about this and it messes things up, you will have _things to say._ You're not sure what they are, but _oh will you ever be saying them._ At the moment you actually barely know _what_ you're saying but you're semi-consciously babbling about it out loud. A lot.

"... and so I know Yang said all that stuff about Reg being a jerk but seriously he's a _really nice guy!"_

It will be _amazing_ if everything works out like you want it to! Oh, but... Jade's kinda _looking_ at you, and people get that look when you've been talking way too much and it's weird but they're trying to be nice. Maybe! She doesn't have _exactly_ that look. You... think? One of these days you're gonna make a journal of people's expressions with all the tiny little differences and just _study_ it... okay no you're not, but it _was_ a nice idea while it lasted.

"I promise I'll meet him with an open mind," she says, and she sounds so _reassuring_ _._ You're a big jerk for assuming things. Ugh, this is why you don't have any friends! You always find a way to make it awkward and weird and _complicated._

After about a minute of fiddling around in your skirt pockets, you're starting to feel lost like you always do – you could talk about something? Guns? Monsters? Her completely bizarre life? – but _she_ actually breaks the silence, which is probably good because she's a lot better at this than you are if you're being totally honest with yourself, and you are.

"So, now I've seen a few other people out here with these kind of collapsed weapons on them, so... is your scythe really special, or are a lot of weapons here multi-purpose?"

Oh. My. God. Yes. _This_ you can talk about. The battle-nerd in you has been _released._

"Well, _I_ like to think my baby is special," you beam, "but yeah! It's pretty common 'cause having more options is always good in a fight, and people also do other stuff with the idea, like I did with Crescent Rose! See she's a pretty high quality ultra-light metal because if she wasn't then she'd be too heavy for me to really use, but also because _I'm_ really really light I can fire and use the recoil to put a ton of power into a swing, or jump higher or move around super fast, and it works really well with my Semblance too which is Speed?"

You think she's about to say something, but there's no stopping your mouth now.

"So it's stuff like that, although Crescent Rose _is_ kinda complicated and I don't think most people go that far, even if they totally should because I feel like it's important to have something you can do at any distance? And if you can combine your Semblance with some other special property you build your weapon to work with then there's potential for extra awesome stuff like how I fight!"

"Okay," she says very slowly, watching you huffing, winded by yourself, her ears kinda perked up and forward, and for a second even though the ears say otherwise you still think she must be thinking 'oh my god shut up' but no, that's not it.

"I have... _s_ _o many ideas_ right now. I mean, if that kind of super durable ultralight metal is available – but the question is how _controllable_ that would be... if it could somehow compensate for the recoil... if I'd ever even _need_ a gun that did _that_..." she blinks and fiddles with her dress, ears flicking back. "Sorry, I should geek out about that later. So... what exactly is a Semblance?"

She stares at you like the fact that you're staring at _her_ in total awe is the crazy part.

 

* * *

 RWBY

N  **J** K A

* * *

  

By the time she's done explaining things and circling around at least five complete tangents, your head is spinning a little, but that's okay. You just learned a _lot_ of really important stuff, _wow._ People can use their souls as shielding, sort of, and also to _activate and manipulate most forms of energy propellant_ – that is _so_ awesome, the scientific implications are massive, you're going to need to find some textbooks – and fighters who train their souls can unlock their own unique superpower. Hers is 'Speed,' although you think from how she's described it that it's not really _speed_ so much as it's the ability to suddenly generate a burst of velocity in whatever direction she wants.

Do you have an aura? This world seems to have assimilated you, so you probably do. Then... would you be able to train yourself enough to have a Semblance?

... and what would it be, if you did?

Okay, you can't get carried away with that. It's a really neat idea, but if you start hoping that you'll just get your Space powers back, you'll probably end up sad and disappointed in the end. You _do_ really want to try, though. If you're stuck in a world like this for very long at all, you are sure not going to be weak or helpless! You'd rather be the exact opposite. It's not that power can fix _everything_ – you know _that_ painfully well – but you'd rather have it and not need it than the other way around.

Being able to get stabbed or shot or blown up without dying instantly also sounds really nice. Dying hurts a lot. You'd kind of love to not ever die again.

"How do I unlock my aura, then?" Ruby pauses for a second, maybe trying to remember something? She keeps doing little fidgety things with her hands. This girl really does move a mile a minute, not even just physically. You wonder if she actually _could_ do a mile in a minute, and decide on 'probably.'

"I guess there are kind of three basic ways? One's the most 'basic' way where you have to try to meditate and do other fancy stuff and it takes _foreeeever –_ " you get the feeling she's talking from experience there – "and the second is, like, really strong emotions and weird spiritual personality stuff can resonate in the right situation and make your aura wake up on its own, and the third one is having somebody else do it for you, which takes like thirty seconds!"

You blink at that last one. That does sound like a good way to start! There's nothing wrong with being slow and meticulous, but... SBURB _might_ have spoiled you on instant gratification with powers and stuff. Hmmmm.

"How does that last one work? Can anyone do it or is it really special?"

"Oh! Um I don't think _anyone_ can do it, exactly, but I think most people can if they've trained their own aura enough? There's this stuff you're supposed to say that I think is supposed to help both people kind of relax and focus, but I don't really remember what it is, there's some stuff about virtue and not being dead I think? But then some people make up their own, so I really don't know about that part..."

Ruby looks a little bit sad, there. You've been getting the impression that she's the kind of person who can only remember things properly if they're personally interesting. She said that remembering it wasn't _necessary_ , though, right? Just... helpful. Then you actually _might..._ no, you _should_ just ask! She's really nice. Even if it turns out to be a social disaster, she'll be nice about it, you think.

"Then... do you think _you_ can unlock an aura?"

She stares at you in confusion for a few seconds.

"I mean _maybe?_ If I ever needed to I could at least _try._ I don't think I know anyone who'd need that thouOHHHH I GET IT NOW!" She sounds like she just won a contest.

"Sorry," you mumble, although maybe you don't have anything to be sorry for? "If it's weird or anything, I don't want to impose?" You wince a little; there are _souls_ involved here, so there _has_ to be some kind of awkwardness to –

Three minutes later you're in a quieter spot, not so close to the traffic, which is – _nope_ you are not thinking about cars Jade do _not_ go there – pretty loud, especially for you.

"Okay, I'm going to make something up on the fly in case it helps!"

Awkwardly, she takes one of your hands in both of hers. It feels kind of weird! You guess you don't really... touch people very often? She squints, and you feel something... _unique_ around the place where you're touching. It reminds you of wind, disturbed air, but it's way too localized for that... no, wait, now it's spreading, up your arm and through your shoulders down the other, up your neck and down your back...

Ruby's eyes snap open, shimmering like –

 _two_ _mirrors_ _that go on forever_ _bathed_ _in_ _silvery_ _moonlight,_ _a sea of blood dripping up into the sky and becoming_ _a thousand rose petals_ _blow_ _n_ _in a storm,_ _strange stars_ _carefully hung up_ _in felt-black_ _eternity by_ _strings tied to your fingers,_ _a_ _twisted sun_ _blazing green and hellish_ _beyond the cold of the nothingness beyond nothingness_

Dimly, you notice that you've closed your eyes, but it doesn't really seem important. You're seething from the outside in, something straining to pass through cracks in a pane of glass.

And, softly, she speaks.

 

_"There's a moment we make a decision_

_Not to cower and crash to the ground_

_The moment we face our worst demons_

_Our courage found_

 

_When we stand with friends_

_And we won't retreat_

_As we stare down death_

_Then the taste is sweet."_

 

You open your eyes to Ruby leaning against a wall, breathing hard, and your body is shining, encased in what looks like sparks of jade fire all melted into a sort of liquid, before it fades – not away, but back _in_. Wow. So it _did_ work, then? That was kind of intense.

"Are you... okay?"

"I'm fine!" Ruby smiles, a little bit weakly. "Just... tired. Did it work?"

"Yeah, I think so. It's like... I can just barely feel... I'm not really sure how to describe it. But I think I can sort of _move_ it inside of me a little, or... well, anyway, thank you so much!" You trail off, struggling to find the right words, but you give up pretty fast. Her aura's unlocked, so she must understand anyway. "What was that stuff you were saying? I thought you were going to make it up, but then it sounded like you knew exactly what you wanted to say!"

She tilts her head curiously.

"I didn't say anything," brow beginning to furrow, "... did I?"

"You did! You said some really cool stuff. It sounded like poetry, or maybe lyrics to a song."

"Oh," she says, and you can smell her rising anxiety. "That's cool? I think?"

A little bit of time goes by. She's still tired, and you... you're not _tired_ , but you do feel really strange, and you don't mind having fifteen minutes or so to get used to it a little.

"Thank you again for helping me out," you say, suddenly awkward. You literally cannot possibly say it enough, especially now. Ruby smiles and shrugs. "Should we be... going? I don't mind just hanging around, it's really nice here. I'm just checking, I guess!"

 _"_ _Right!"_ Whoa, she must always be in this zero to sixty in a millisecond mode. And her 'sixty' is, well, incredibly loud, at least to you. "We're not even that far! Ooooh, this is going to be great, I just _know_ it!" She leaps up and grabs your wrist, practically dragging you down the street. Is this how _she_ felt when you were nerding out over being in such an awesome city, earlier? It probably is.

And then, just a couple minutes later, you've made it to your destination, standing in front of a shop with yellow caution tape hung over the door like a banner. _'WARNING: LOW PRICES AND QUALITY GOODS.'_ And above that, the sign. In between two painted bullets, there it is: the store's name.

You marvel at the words _'THE INCREDIBLE MR. GUN,'_ and you think you'll get along with this 'Reg' guy juuuust fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, comment-person Red: if you happen to have any interest in beta-reading this fic, drop me an email at huskiesandpugs@gmail.com . I could use somebody who seems more attuned to noticing the kind of major plot errors I make than I myself am! In any case, feel free to comment about whatever, whenever. uwu
> 
> Last thing, I swear: here's some arrival time info.  
> NEPETA: 33 days prior to Beacon  
> JADE: 30 days prior to Beacon  
> KANAYA: 37 days prior to Beacon  
> ARADIA: 50 days prior to Beacon minimum, actual time deliberately ambiguous


	15. The Incredible Mr. Gun (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be up in a day or three guaranteed, it's just about ready. Welcome to More Meager Scraps of Plot, by the way, have fun with that.

_and the question, oh the question_

_can the kid keep his eyes?_

_if the fire doesn't die, say no, i said no_

_i said "you don’t know what king we serve, boy_

_you don't know what things we employ"_

 

[ sunset rubdown - they took a vote and said no ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62CzSjav0Ww)

 

* * *

RWB **Y**

NJKA

* * *

**29 days prior to Beacon**

**Evening**

 

This is gonna be an interesting night.

You're a little torn on that. On the one hand, you get to either wreck the same club twice or just scare the hell out of them, which sounds like fun. On the _other_ hand... You feel kind of weirdly guilty about going behind Ruby's back just in case her broke homeless friend's a great liar and secretly notorious or risking other people's safety to hide from... _whoever?_ She said it's been years since her village was wiped off the face of Remnant, but who wiped it out, and would they care if there were survivors?

But hey. Ruby is... you love her to death and she's nothing resembling helpless, but _people_ and _common sense_ aren't really her thing, and somebody has to look out for her. You've got a lot of practice with that.

It crosses your mind that _you_ could technically be in danger, too, but you're _good_ at fighting other people. Your sister is a Huntress through and through, and that scythe really wasn't designed for anything but killing Grimm. Neither was Ruby, honestly.

Alright. It's not _too_ late yet, but there's a long drive ahead of you, so it can't hurt to get moving early.

Bumblebee's got a decently fresh set of crystals, you're dressed and geared up... is there anything you're forgetting? Probably not. Cool! If everything goes well, you'll come out of this knowing absolutely nothing more about Weirdo Foreigner. And... if not, you'll sure be learning a thing a thing or two about this Jade... uh. Jade... what was it... ah god, do you really not know her last name?

You sigh and grab your scroll.

 

gorgeousInferno (GI) opened relay with  crescentRose (CR)

 

GI: hey

GI: hey

GI: hey

GI: remnant to ruby

GI: hey rubes

GI: its been two minutes

GI: RUBY ROSE >:(

GI: IF YOUR SCROLLS ON SILENT AGAIN

CR: gaah i'm here i'm here! and don't even start about that it was ONE TIME

GI: its been at least four times this week

CR: WHY WERE YOU KEEPING COUNT

CR: wait no don't answer that

CR: so what's up??

GI: you know jades last name right

CR: um OBVIOUSLY?!? what kind of friend would i even be if oh wow actually no i don't 1 sec

GI: are you serious

GI: at least i have an excuse

GI: siiiigh why are you being so slooooooow

CR: and what exactly is that supposed to mean??

GI: it means WHY DID THAT TAKE ANOTHER FIVE MINUTES

CR: not that! i was asking what YOUR excuse is?!! jeez

GI: thats easy

GI: im just me, you know? ;)

CR: that's not an excuse!!!..........

CR: anyway it's harley

GI: wait, what is?

CR: OH MY GOD, YANG!!! it's jade harley! her name is jade harley!

GI: ohhhh right

GI: cool thx

  
gorgeousInferno (GI) closed relay with  crescentRose (CR)

 

 _There_ you go. _Finally._ Was that really so hard?

You put your scroll away again, double-check your helmet, and blast off toward the highway.

 

* * *

 **J** MM

* * *

  **Late evening**

 

This is _not_ how you like a night to go. Reconstruction's been ripping your finances to shreds, some of your men are still in the hospital, and yet somehow you'd rather have Blondie back and ruining everything than be stuck in the situation you're in right now.

"I'm telling you, I _don't know._ Torchwick's bad business and I haven't got a death wish. Guy drops off the map six months ago along with half his gang, shows up last week out of the blue, hires a few men, and poof, they're all gone without a trace. Hate to say it, but that's that."

The shortish man in front of you looks up to meet your eyes and you damn near flinch, but you take _pride_ in this job, and you're not gonna be intimidated. The girl next to him is still quietly keeping an eye on the rest of the club, and she's good at it, too. You doubt you'd have noticed yourself if she wasn't three feet away.

"Are you certain that is all the information you possess regarding Roman Torchwick?"

Somehow you manage to keep up with this staring contest. Those eyes... that expression. Everything about it screams _'I don't need to kill you, but I could if I felt like it, and it wouldn't even be hard."_

At least the last psycho in here didn't leave any actual _casualties._ She might have downed every last one of you, but she was obviously in it for the fun. These two? They don't even look like fighters. If they took two steps into a crowd they'd just _disappear_ , and you bet you could see them again and not recognize their faces.

You've heard of these guys, but you don't work out of Atlas, you'd never thought there was much substance to any of the freakier rumors.

After tonight you're never setting foot in that Kingdom as long as you live.

You take a breath, try to stay professional.

 _"Yes._ I'm sure. Are we _done_ here?"

The girl cocks her head slightly to the side.

"That is sufficient," she says, and you call up every ounce of Tough Guy you can to hold in a sigh of relief. Now it's time to finish this up and pray they never come back.

"Good. The rest of the info comes to about..." You take a good long moment to think about this. This place doesn't run _itself_ , but it definitely doesn't run if you're dead. Maybe you'll have to throw in a silent discount. "Eight thousand."

The man nods and hands over a single card. You blink.

"That's ten thousand," you say, and the businessman in you is screaming _'don't tell the customer they overpaid or you're losing the extra, idiot,'_ but this is just weird.

"Yes," the girl says, and her head tilts a little bit more. "The information that you know nothing of Roman Torchwick's recent activities is valuable in and of itself." She taps a finger against her thigh, just _staring_. The exact same spot, in careful patterns. Dear god, they're bugged. Of course they are. Why would you ever have thought they _weren't?_

A few split-second hisses of quiet static come from... _somewhere_ , and her eyes flick over to the guy, who nods very slightly.

"The Empire has nothing to gain from cheating a flea," she says, and then smiles, _earnestly_. The man shrugs as if to say _'that's just how it is,'_ and suddenly that horrible feeling is gone and you're looking at completely normal human beings, not... whatever ice-blooded _things_ were here five seconds ago.

"Thanks for the tips, buddy," the man says, and it sounds _natural_. "Have a good one!" He waves and heads right for the exit. The girl winks at you, loose and casual, before skipping off after him.

You'd almost think nothing terrifying had happened at all.

 

* * *

RWB **Y**

NJKA

* * *

 

Okay, the borderline Mistralian drifting and flashy skidding entrances you put your machine through get rough on the tires, so sue you. Style matters, alright? When they start giving you trouble, you'll just go semi-professionally punch some money out of somebody else's problems if you don't have the Lien to deal with it already. Tires are replaceable, but first impressions? Not so much.

A few of Hei Xiong's bouncers recognize you instantly. The thing is, you were expecting that to cause you _trouble,_ even before you got inside. Instead, some guy and some girl who really don't look like they belong here make their way out - the guy gives you a weird little _nod_ and you're not sure what it means - and then something _really_ weird happens.

There are four of those almost identical dudes out front, and when the civilians pass by, two of the bouncers look real nervous. The other two take off their hats, then they take off _wigs_ that were over way less uniform hair _,_ lose the trademark red shades, and both the bouncers and completely normal people just... walk off into the dark together without a single word.

As for the two guys left behind... Well. You're not saying they look about a second away from having to change their pants, but also, you're definitely saying they look about a second away from having to change their damn pants.

The plan was for _you_ to cause that reaction. What are you missing here? You look over your shoulder, and then kinda stop, because the street's completely empty. They couldn't have had time to get more than ten feet behind you, but they're still just... _gone._

You didn't really come here expecting anything weird. If you did run into something fishy, that'd be the _info_ you got, not... whatever _this_ is.

Once you do get to the remaining bouncers at the door, they give you this look like _'oh, good, it's just her,'_ which might piss you off if it didn't raise so many questions. They don't try to stop you. One of them actually just _shrugs_.

Junior's not hard to find; he's generally the tallest person in any room, and he still dresses like someone who needs to be punched in the face.

... Even _he_ looks completely fried.

"Oh good, just who I wanted to see," with a kind of weary half-groan. "Maybe this time you could try _not_ destroying half of my business?"

"Aw, come on, we're buddies, right? And besides..." You grab him by the arm and just drag him off to the bar to talk. "... _you_ still owe me a drink."

He's still pretty subdued. The whole place has an uncomfortable vibe to it this time around, actually. People are dancing, music is playing, things are smooth, and yet every single thug looks at you like they're just glad you're the lesser of two evils.

So who were those people who left, then?

Junior starts mixing something up - you're not even sure it's for you, it looks more like force of habit - and you start thinking about what to ask him.

"You know, you put a few of my boys in the hospital."

"They'll be fine. It's good to get a workout once in awhile."

The look you get is not friendly.

"You know, you put one of my _nieces_ in the hospital," he says, and okay, yeah, that makes a little more sense, but still.

"Well, maybe she shouldn't have picked a fight with an actual _fighter,"_ you say, and he squeezes the glass hard enough for you to hear a little bit of a crack.

"Sure. Because _we're_ the ones who walked into a club, grabbed the owner by the crotch, and then beat the hell out of everyone else."

"Hey, you're the one who said 'you'll pay for that.' That's called a _'threat,'_ so don't act like I'm the bad guy here."

"You're the one who gave me a _reason_ to throw out threats. Now Miltia's got three broken ribs, a cracked collarbone, and acute aura depletion."

"Good for her. She'll get over it. You mess with the best, you -"

"Her sister spends two hours at the hospital every day. That still _fun_ for you?" The drink slams against the counter, spilling a bit over the edge. Something weird clenches in your chest at that one, just for a second, but... whatever. It's _not_ your problem. "So. Give me one reason not to sic every guy in this club on you just out of spite."

That one makes you think, but... the answer's pretty simple.

You flash a few cards and he drops his face in his hands.

"Fine," he mumbles. "Who cares about dignity or family, anyway? Obviously not you. The hell do you want from me now, blondie?"

_(ruby in a cheap white gown in cheap white casts a cheap white bed)_

"What I want is anything you know about a girl named Jade Harley. Dog faunus, big white ears, green eyes, pretty short, maybe new in town, maybe not."

"Yeah? And what if I don't know anything? Planning on killing anybody this time around?"

"I don't _kill_ people," you say, rolling your eyes, and he throws a vicious glare your way.

_(too many tubes, those awful needles in her arms)_

"Nah, of course you don't. I'm sure it'll stay that way, too, right up until you pull the trigger at the wrong second and blow somebody's guts out their back. Drop the moral high ground, blondie. We're all scum here."

"Tell me what I want to know and you get paid in _Lien_ instead of _fists,_ " you grit out. This idiot got on your nerves last time, but he's _really_ pushing it now. You don't have to sit through some morality lecture from a guy who rents out goons to whatever criminal needs an extra body to hold a fire axe or pulse pistol.

Seriously, cry you a river. Baby ended up hurt 'cause she bit off more than she could chew. What a tragedy. If you're gonna fight, then you'd better be ready to _get_ fought. That's just common sense.

_(bloody bandages all around her waist, 'lucky not to have been disemboweled')_

He takes a minute to think, messes with his scroll. You tap your finger against the counter: _'hurry it up, already.'_

"Listen, blondie. Hard truth is I've got nothing on this one, either. If you wanna throw another tantrum in here, to hell with it. Go right ahead."

Huh.

"Nothing? Like, not even _one_ thing?"

 _"Nothing,"_ he says, and you have to admit you're kind of relieved. You really wanted to like Jade. You really wanted Ruby to have a _friend_ for once. And hey, maybe that still gets to happen!

Oh, wait, he's still talking for some reason. Sigh. You already got what you wanted, who cares anymore? Blah blah, no registered citizens matching the name or description, no traces in the underworld, whatever. You sort of assumed that was obvious from the _'nothing'_ part.

_(she'll wake up she's fine she'll wake up but what if what if what if what if)_

Well, this stuff calls for some thinking later, but... all in all, you'd say it's for the best.

"At least she's better than _those_ freaks," he mutters under his breath, and you don't think you were supposed to notice. Now _that's_ an interesting sentence.

"What freaks?"

His expression says you're an idiot for asking and that's he too burned-out and tired to care.

"Imperials. Gang from up north, around Atlas. I don't hear much about 'em, they seem pretty small-time, but... they really know how to get information." ... _ooooh._ Maybe _now_ you see.

"Was that... them, leaving a couple minutes ago?"

"What do _you_ think?"

_(your fault your fault your fault your fault)_

"Well, two of your guys took off their hats and their hair and left with them, so... I _think_ you might want to work on your security." His eyes go wide and then droop again in this really pathetic, helpless way. He shakes his head and lets it slump into his palms again.

"Just decide whether you're going to maim anyone else before you leave, or if I should keep waiting for the Empire to show up and murder somebody _on purpose_."

You think for a while. At least five seconds. You don't really like your answer, but you give it anyway.

"I'll be in touch if I need anything," you say, and drop a few spare cards, maybe fifty or sixty Lien total, before walking right back out. He's not stupid enough to get in your way.

 

* * *

**Night**

 

The drive home's awkward in a way that's hard to put into words. Something's really bothering you, maybe a couple of somethings, and you don't want to be thinking about any of it right now. At all. Now _you're_ tired, and you really didn't have much fun tonight. Talk about a letdown. Well, you got what you wanted. You shouldn't complain _too_ much.

Outside the temporary Rose and Xiao Long residence, you're close to the door when you hear... _something._ A hiss. Maybe. Just barely. No, definitely. Little... bursts of static, like a bad scroll signal during a call or a viewscreen that's tuned wrong.

You turn to look, but there's nothing to see but some middle-aged drunk woman stumbling along, groceries on an arm that's sort of bumping into her leg over and over from the weight and her slight limp. Whatever. All you care about at this point is whether or not dream-girl shows up again. Man, you hope she's real. _She's_ not boring, not even slightly.

Once you get the door open, you realize the static noise is gone. A quick look back confirms that the lady on the street's gone, too.

You're not sure exactly what it is about this that sends a little shiver through you, but once you're inside the apartment, you end up triple-checking every single lock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I won't ever get into details because economics is not my thing but assume 1 Lien to be worth loosely 50 US cents. 100 Lien would be something in the vague neighborhood of $40-60.


	16. The Incredible Mr. Gun (3)

_onward and forward to another day_

_engines of a forgotten time_

_electric streets and city lights_

_to the highways that will guide us home_

 

[vnv nation – teleconnect 1](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3YSARMqMzI)

 

* * *

 **R** WBY

NJKA

* * *

  **Late afternoon**

 

The inside of the store is _exactly_ how you remember it: on one side of the counter it's all neat and tidy and stuff, and the other side's littered with big piles of crazy (and not-so-crazy) guns that are _super_ not safe being stored like that. If you're being honest with yourself, you'd totally organize a gun store the same way, even just for the fun factor. What's the worst that could happen, anyway? They can't do anything more dangerous than just explode!

But more importantly, the walls are _covered_ in glass cases full of Reg's masterpieces. The way the dim light of the store shines on polished gunmetal, gleams off barrels and stocks and... oh you're drooling and you need to say hi to him because you're in his store, whoops. You wipe the corner of your mouth clean with your sleeve.

Meanwhile, Jade looks a little bit like she just stepped into the most beautiful place on Remnant. You can't blame her, 'cause she did! Reg is behind the counter polishing something – ohmygod you hope it's some really cool custom order, because even if you don't use them or even always _see_ them, you get excited thinking about all the weird guns he gets commissioned to make and somehow manages to make work by (as far as you can tell) just staring physics down and saying _'nope.'_

"Hiiii!", flinging yourself up to the counter. He knew you were there, you're sure (probably), but it's polite to say it! He's exactly how you remembered him from four days ago, which you assume is a good thing, because that's not very much time and if there was some big difference it'd probably be a bad one and oh right you were doing something. Reg looms over you the way he looms over everyone - by having the floor on his side of the counter deceptively higher than the rest of the room, he is _teensy,_ he is barely taller than _you_ are - and gives you a serious look and a little nod, then another little nod in Jade's direction.

When he sees _her_ , though, he freezes up, just for a second. Maybe he knows her from somewhere, or... nah, that wouldn't make any sense! She must just remind him of somebody. Happens all the time!

"That's my friend Jade! She's..." you look around and then whisper, _"a huge nerd."_

Reg nods again, appreciatively. He raises an eyebrow - well, he raises a brow, he doesn't have eyebrows, he just has skin and stuff as far as you know, unless... are invisible eyebrows a thing? _Someone out there_ _must_ _know_ _._ Anyway! Reg does the thing with his face.

"She needs a new gun because she lost her old rifle somehow and basically no wait actually _hey_ _Jade come over here!"_

"Huh? Oh, sure! Sorry." She smiles a little, fluffy pricked ears suddenly dropping nervously. Right, you forgot she's not very good with people. Well, neither are you, but with your powers combined, you might actually have enough social skills to equal one whole normal person! "Hi! My name is -" she blinks, gets a weird look on her face for a second, then shakes her head and goes on, "um, Jade! I'm Ruby's... friend? I think?"

Wait, she 'thinks?' That's. Weeeell, that stings a little bit, and you...

"I thought we already were friends," you say very quietly, which is completely an accident, you weren't _actually_ going to say it but then you did and oh man you're the worst? At all of this?

"We are? I mean... I didn't want to just assume..." Her ears don't _quite_ go all the way flat, but... ohhhhhh wow wait she _wants_ to be friends but she was afraid you didn't want to? Even after all the stuff that happened and that you and Yang did for her? Or maybe it's _because_ of all that stuff. Does she feel guilty about it? You'd probably feel guilty about it too if you were her even though she definitely shouldn't feel guilty about it.

"Of course we're friends! I wouldn't let somebody sleep over at my place if I wasn't their friend! Or family!"

"But you did that an hour after you met me."

"I HAVE A GOOD EYE FOR FRIENDS anyway Jade this is Reg, he does guns, Reg this is Jade, she loves guns! And science? And probably other stuff I mean I think most people have at least three interests or maybe even four -"

He gives you a _look._ It's a look Yang gives you sometimes and it means 'Ruby, you're rambling, get to the point,' but in a nice way. Reg doesn't say much. It seems like he only bothers when he needs to for his work and customers and stuff.

"So um, Jade needs a rifle! But she doesn't actually have any money or like, any... anything? And actually I was hoping I could ask for a super huge favor like really huge but Jade doesn't have a job or anything and she's kind of really screwed actually now that I think about and I know you don't even _have_ employees but could she maybe prove she knows what she's doing and get a part-time job doing something or maybe some other thing or..." You are rambling again. Like, a lot. "... yeah that pretty much covers it."

Jade looks up at him nervously while he looks down at... her ears, you think? Oh come on, you _know_ he's not all weird like that. Right? Like... the average person doesn't have anything against faunus! That's just... like... crazy! It's not like a _lot_ of people are...

... but how would _you_ know, though? You never really paid attention, did you? You guess... anybody could be a jerk, and you could go a really long time not even knowing it. You're human. Of course it's less obvious.

Wow you really feel weird about a lot of stuff all of a sudden.

"... make sure you stick to the rules," he rumbles - he has such a deep voice for such a little guy - "don't want to see you end up in the slammer. Be a real shame." Then he turns back to you. "Need to check on something." And he heads off just like that, through the door behind the counter.

... You really didn't expect this at all, and you feel like kind of a terrible friend.

"Um. I'm. If he got weird... because you're a faunus?" You sort of cringe without meaning to. "I didn't think he was, um, I... was that him being a jerk I really couldn't tell for sure but it seemed like he was so I'm really really sorry?" She doesn't... look upset, though? Her ears are back up, but in a sort of relaxed way, so you don't think she's just trying to act okay. It's weird, but her ears are _really_ expressive, like, there is no subtlety there, not even a little. That could actually maybe get her into trouble someday if she has to lie to somebody who's super familiar with dogs.

"Why would a faunus be prejudiced against another faunus?"

... Whah? Wait, since when...

"B... so has he been a faunus the whole time I've been coming here and I just... _didn't notice?"_

"He smells like a ferret, so, I guess so! I can't really _see_ any evidence, though, so if he never said anything, I don't think a human would have been able to tell."

"... yeah but still, this is my favorite gun store, I found this place _years_ ago."

She shrugs, and you feel like a bad person. Well... you guess there could've been worse outcomes than this just now!

Reg slips back in the rear door and looks Jade over again. It's a little creepy, but you know he doesn't mean it in a creepy way. He's always sort of looking people over, really!

"Shipment came in the other day. Got some guns to assemble. Got standards to meet. Built _right."_

"To make sure we can stop crimes?"

He nods gravely. Aww, Jade fits right in! You _knew_ they'd get along.

"More hands are good. Can't pay much, though. Could pay in guns."

Jade fidgets awkwardly, but she looks a lot more hopeful about whatever now, and that makes you pretty happy to see. You don't think she's actually used to being a nervous person! Or maybe just not used to being as nervous as she has been? She did live alone on an island, right? It must be weird to have so many people around all the time. Vale must seem _totally crazy_ to her! Well, you... sort of knew that already, but now it's sort of sinking in a little bit, and you're realizing that she's not really the same kind of bad-with-people that you are. She totally _is_ bad with people though! You are friends sharing a hardship! It's just a little bit of a different flavor of nervous.

"... if I work for you, can I use some of your tools to make a new gun? That's the thing I really need right now."

Reg nods again. He seems pleased by this! Good! Wait, but didn't she need somewhere to stay, and money and stuff so she can get one? Does she have a _secret plan?_ You hope she has a secret plan. Secret plans are the best, and super fun, and they always end happy for everyone!

... well maybe not always, but a girl can dream, okay?

 

* * *

  **Evening**

  
Reg ends up taking her back with him to the private section of his workshop to show her around or something, you weren't really listening, and you pass the time by re-reading the last six issues of Weapon Magazine.

You think that probably at least like, an hour or two goes by! This is totally fine but Jade apologizes for it when she comes back out, even though she looks really happy. But it's almost closing time, which is kind of early at The Incredible Mr. Gun, because Reg does lots of tinkering and doesn't like being bothered after 7 PM for some reason, so you head back out to the street, where evening is coming on and hardlight posts are spreading their glow a little bit early.

Bloop-buzz! Your scroll's going off, or to be specific, you got a Scrollian notification. You pull it out and... argh, of course it's Yang, who else would it be? And jeez, insulting much, of course you know Jade's last oh wow actually no you don't.

"Hey, um, Jade! Sorry this is a dumb question but what's your last name?"

"Oh, it's Harley," she says. "Jade Harley!"

"Thanks! Wait, how do you spell that? I'm replying to a message from Yang."

"H-a-r-l-e-y!"

 _"Perfect._ There we go - blahh, why is she always so rude on Scrollian, she disconnects _so fast."_

"What's that?"

"What's what? Scrollian? It's like a messaging thingy! For chatting with people. A lot of people use it."

Jade stops dead on the sidewalk, which you should have done while you were typing actually because wow that was not safe at all. She looks kind of like she got hit by lightning, but not exactly, because you got hit by lightning one time and you remember it hurting a lot. Dad was so mad, too. It's not _your_ fault Yang dared you to pretend to be a lightning rod. What were you supposed to do, say no? That's crazy.

"How much does a scroll cost, usually?" She says it kinda slow, and you can tell she's still thinking super hard.

"Let me think... a decent one is probably going to be five or six hundred Lien, but if you just need a pretty basic one, you could get something for one-fifty or two hundred?"

"He gave me a few hundred in advance."

Oh wow really, do they normally do that at jobs? You don't think they do that. Suddenly you're pretty curious about what actually happened in that back room!

"Actually he was really, _really_ nice. I'm kind of excited to work there for a while!" Aww, she sounds really happy! "So, would it be too late in the day for me to go try to buy a scroll?"

"Ummm..." you stop and try to really think about it. She's probably not a registered citizen, but she could still get a cheap one without really needing a credit check... "It's probably not too late! What's up?"

"I think I found a way to look for my friends," Jade says, and her voice just... almost breaks, and whoa, you think she's maybe going to cry but then no, she doesn't. Dang, that's heavy.

"... and my brother," she says more quietly, and wow that's even heavier! Well, it's worth a shot, right?

"That settles it then! Off to the scroll store!" Now that you have a mission you've got plenty more energy to work with, and if there's one single thing Ruby Rose is good at apart from killing Grimm, it's being fast. You don't know when the scroll store closes, but you can do it!

Wherever you need to be, you get there before it's too late, no matter what!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Expect a hell of a chapter in the next couple of days, and I hope that helps make up for the inconsistency of updates a bit. The thing's done and just needs editing, but uh. It's a bit of a brick by this fic's standards.


	17. Huntress x Huntress (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy saturday
> 
>  
> 
> **note: if reading about any kind of dysphoria is upsetting to you then approach this one with caution**

 

_white out, two lights shining on a dead end_

_drawn out like circles trailing off the pavement_

_stand out, don't stop marching 'til the hearts mend_

 

[the birthday massacre - weekend](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kS24cRe4dOs)

 

* * *

RWBY

NJ **K** A

* * *

**29 Days Prior to Beacon**

**Late Afternoon**

 

You had no choice but to flee the 'hospital;' that desire has not changed in the least. And yet, there is a nagging feeling that no, Kanaya, maybe you should have simply accepted it as it was, even temporarily. You doubt you would be concerned if the 'nagging feeling' was not _actually_ a persistent and serious pain in your shoulder. Pain is pain and you're no stranger to it – not much compares to having a hole blown through you by a fake wizard – but this still...

To put it as eloquently as possible, it still really, _really_ sucks.

Also, you probably should have taken your clothing with you. This is an excellent lesson on the value of keeping a warm head during stressful situations. Luckily, it was not an issue that was too difficult to overcome; your... your new... _your kind,_ Kanaya, get used to it, are at least friendlier to their own than the humans are. Now you find yourself outfitted in a cruder version of your standard attire, though you opted to replace black with a very dark green, mostly so that you stand out at least _slightly_ less against the snow. You're probably silly for bothering when the difference is so minimal, but it's begun to feel like every little bit counts.

You're learning more than you ever wanted to about _humans_ in Atlas every day, and this one is no exception. You're also learning what it must have felt like to be rust or bronze – _burgundy_ or bronze, you should correct yourself, there's no need for casteist terms to continue polluting your vocabulary, they should have stopped doing so long ago anyway - and it would appear that the experience is completely awful. Of course in a past life you experienced some casteism yourself; even Vriska was not above taking shots at the slight difference in the two of you when she was particularly angry. Granted, Vriska was... well...

She was not the troll you wanted her to be, and frankly, you're a bit upset that you still have conflicting feelings about the girl at all after so much time. Any flushed inclinations are long-dead, at least, burned away and replaced with something cleaner and less twisted, something that you cannot lose, that you _have_ to... no. Not now. Not yet, even after nearly a week. You cannot allow yourself to obsess over Rose. She is here, somewhere, in this world. You absolutely refuse to believe otherwise. Right now you have to do what you can to ensure your own survival, and you can't risk being consumed with worry. You won't be any good to her dead. For all you know, the dreambubbles are gone as well; your sleep has consisted of actual dreams, for better or worse.

Well, mostly for worse. Your jumbled thoughts are as much the product of nights spent staring at the ceiling as anything else.

At least you have plenty more jumbles to consider as you walk, biting back a pained grimace with every step. It has been a rather busy day; in addition to the aforementioned, you've finally found a place that will actually sell you a scroll. It's left you nearly destitute, since finding a place to pawn the spoils of your idiotic alleyway brawl has been difficult at best. You're also fairly sure you were overcharged, and it is far from ideal in quality compared to other wireless devices you saw on display, but something tells you it would be unwise to deprive yourself of any simple method of long-range communication.

For now you need to find a place to stay, the sooner the better. You've enough 'Lien' to make it through at least one more night, perhaps two, but remaining outdoors as night falls in Atlas is a deeply foolish idea. Not only is it dreadfully cold, but during the day most of the random disdain you experience is simply dirty or resentful looks and comments, but with darkness comes boldness and you are in no condition to fight at the moment.

Your... _aura,_ as it seems to be called, has at least somewhat eased your rightful feelings of inadequacy; you appear to have a sort of extremely rudimentary control over the stuff, and it's become clear that if nothing else its presence mildly dulls your pain and might, in fact, be slightly enhancing your physical capabilities. You really doubt that you would be walking at all without it, at least in this worthless body.

The streets of Atlas are shocking to navigate in a strange and primal way. There is an extraordinary contrast between the icy bite of the atmosphere and the pulsing heat of blood in every single body that passes you by. While it angers you to admit it, there's something beautiful in what you see, the world itself a peculiar work of art before your very _(_ _wrong_ _)_ eyes.

It is far less beautiful when older humans usher their charges away as you pass, when random strangers cross the street rather than allow themselves to come too near you, when your vastly enhanced hearing can pick up nearly every muttered slur against your person, whether direct or simply fragments of passing conversations.

Today seems particularly unfriendly, and you've caught an impressive number of displeasing sentences in your vicinity, at least several of which were definitely targeted at your specific person. Your tally for today is already at six noteworthy moments.

"Why do they even _let_ those animals run free?" A middle-aged man, unremarkable.

"Come along, sweetheart, over this way -" A human lusus and the smaller creature she safeguards.

"... should just put them all down once and for all." A young woman with a derisive sneer.

" - terrorists by _blood_ , if you ask me -" That same young woman's friend, or perhaps her matesprit.

"You argue now, but what are you gonna say if she ends up becoming the next Blue Fang?" Another man, caught in a dialogue that seems two against one. At least _someone_ half-heartedly cares.

"Waste of taxpayers' Lien to even bother with proper trials, I say we -" Another woman, somewhere.

"Hey, do you think if I threw this, I could hit it from across the street?" A child, smiling without a hint of malice. You walk a bit faster after that one. A single notable injury is quite enough for the moment.

It has been this way to varying degrees every day, though you've gathered that something happened to rile up the midbloods, many of whom are bizarrely supportive of _highbloods_ \- you'll never understand this society, you swear - and a grudge _they_ hold over the deaths of a number of their own. You spent a while fully piecing together the meaning of the words _'White Fang,'_ that it refers to a specific association of rebellious lowbloods who have turned violent. It's only natural; in any society, physiological and social castes fight among one another. To your mind, they seem reasonably justified in their actions, but the rest of this world disagrees, especially in light of this recent disaster.

There is only so much you know. Apparently an infamous culler for hire recently unleashed a rather impressive rampage in order to carry out a job, killing dozens to mask her identity and isolate her mark. You're not sure why such a basic profession is looked down upon, but it is, and viciously so.

Not only that, but the target was a rather important member of what you've come to understand is a complex business association based around the mining and distribution of energy propellant, and this piece of knowledge lead to a far more interesting discovery, one relating to a certain obnoxious girl who angrily struck to kill but lacked the resolve to follow through.

Weiss Schnee is, as it happens, what would appear to be the scion of the ancestral line of seadweller-equivalents at the top of the aforementioned business's internal hierarchy. You had the pleasure of witnessing her on many viewscreens as she gave a rather obviously forced and resentful speech in honor of the deceased.

This is not something you have any particular reason to care about apart from amusement at her suffering, but to your understanding the 'Schnee Dust Company,' or 'SDC' as many call it, is known for the exploitation of lowbloods – of _faunus -_ and it is increasingly clear to you why so many lowbloods on Alternia tended to stick together. It was worse back home, you're quite sure, but...

This is not a pleasant experience, and with the behavior of so many humans around you, you have perhaps begun to share in some of your newly-adopted species's resentment toward the company.

Honestly, you've begun to share in their resentment toward the planet's native humans in general.

You don't have the slightest clue who this 'Blue Fang' woman is, but you do know that she earned the derisive nickname from a tendency to accept most of her contracts directly from the White Fang themselves, and her status as a faunus is widely known due to an apparent tendency to leave behind a calling card of some sort. With that attitude it's surprising she hasn't been found and killed already, but in the end, all that speaks to is her rather impressive skill.

Whoever she is, you can't say you entirely disapprove of her life choices.

A snowsphere sails just by your head, accompanied by the giggles of children.

... You'd better accelerate your search to guarantee a place to stay before full dark. In an hour or two, snowspheres will be the least of your worries.

 

* * *

**Late evening**

 

There is one deeply uncomfortable brush with a small group of intoxicated humans, but you manage to escape without incident, and finally discover a run-down - what is the word again? 'hotel?' - with vacancies run by a faunus with tired eyes and small brown horns.

Now you have less Lien and plenty of time to spend in a block quite empty of anything but yourself and your disgusting mammalian body. You can just sit down on this alien sleeping platform, studiously not think about how similar they are to concupiscent platforms, and hate your life in relative comfort.

You'd love to dig the claws you don't have anymore into this cloth and just... start _shredding it all to bits_. Alone again, now, there's nothing to focus on but yourself. On joints that feel natural and unnatural at once, on muscles and bones that feel the same, on the lack of gray that should comprise your flesh, on your downgraded fangs, on the suddenly itching spots not terribly far from your extra ears, those spots where your ho – horns should be, scratching where you should be incredibly sensitive and feeling nothing of note, doing everything in your power to at least not think about your -

Breathe. Try to breathe. You can't _afford_ to feel this way. You can't. If you lose control _here_ , the consequences will be utterly dire. There is no one here to talk you down, not that there ever really was, even if your quadrant with Rose has always been tinted with a sliver of pale that you know is perverse but seemed unavoidable. No one else who actually cared about you ever... no.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, and no. This is precisely what you're trying to _avoid._ You _have_ to be okay. If you let yourself be anything less than functional and _okay with your situation..._ you won't be at your best. You will be even _weaker_ than what you've already been reduced to. You will be weak, and you will probably _di_ _e_ without ever seeing her again.

A distraction is what you need. Badly. And you have one right here, so just... shut your eyes and breathe, slow, careful. Crush it all down, calm yourself enough to focus on something in the first place.

You can do this. You have to do this.

You are Kanaya Maryam and you are okay and you are moving on with your life for what feels like the twelfth time today. A distraction, right. There's a simple one at hand: familiarizing yourself with your 'new' scroll. The range of functions available even on a cheap model is decent once you discover an 'application store' that, counterintuitively, contains a number of _free_ applications for data acquisition.

Well, perhaps you should say _'download,'_ as clumsy a descriptor it may be. Fitting in will never be _less_ important, unfortunately enough. It all seems reasonably useful; the availability of weather predictions is excellent and would never have existed on Alternia, and should you one day acquire a scroll with a better internal processing system, you could set the device to monitor the overall strength of your aura. The sheer utility of that 'app' is such that you consider it your current third priority. Second is, of course, a place to stay, and first... well.

Regardless of lacking any clear method to accomplish _that_ goal, managing to connect with even one person you know would certainly be a relief. You think it might be rather nice to see Karkat again, for example, though there is an uneasy feeling behind your bonecage when you try to remember what was happening before your abrupt dimensional transfer. There was... heat, anger, fear, and an all-encompassing light...

Your train of thought vanishes and your pusher nearly stops at the sight of the world _Trollian._

A moment later, with a rush of disappointment and a bit of self-flagellation over your stupidity, you realize the word is in fact _'Scrollian.'_

Another moment later and you realize that it probably doesn't matter, because this is clearly Remnant's equivalent, and if Rose... if your _friends_ are out there, they will surely realize the same thing. They will, won't they? They will. They _must._ They _have to._

Calming your breathing yet again, you watch as the acquisition tube slowly fills, and then as the integration gauge does the same.

What to do. What to do. You set your typing color quickly and are halfway through registering as grimAuxiliatrix before something odd bubbles up inside of you. Should you really retain... such a hopelessly dated identity? That handle was chosen sweeps ago by a girl who was a member of an entirely different species, and you're increasingly certain that you will be a part of this world for a long time, if not... _permanently._

Kanaya Maryam the troll is essentially dead, and while the future might change that fact, you would be a fool to behave otherwise at this stage. This begs the question, who are you _now?_ Who were you on the _meteor_ , truthfully? Are you in fact one who wishes so dearly to mediate that she put her very name into the concept? You... don't think that you are, not exactly. When have you benefited from attempting proper ashen courtship? Quite literally _never._

Someone like you should just watch from a distance, perhaps offer basic advice if a situation _really_ bothers you, but true entanglement will only end in disaster. You're well aware that your flushed quadrant is the only one you have any ability to sustain.

You register, then, under the handle of _gravenAdvisor._

This will not help you find your friends, but you can just run two accounts simultaneously. grimAuxiliatrix will remain in case it is searched out, and gravenAdvisor will serve as your primary handle in the future.

Even so, the truth of things eats at your entrails as it has for days, the truth that you _are_ probably alone here, that even if logic suggests _'if one of us is here, there ought to be more,'_ life is simply not so accommodating. It is with an oddly heavy bloodpusher that you press 'Confirm' and then 'Yes I Am Damn Well Sure I Meant To Press Confirm And Do Not Need Your Questioning It As Though I Were A Careless Wriggler.' Well, actually, the button says 'Yes,' but... a bit of embellishment never hurt anyone, did it?

Actually it did, rather often in fact, but you'll stand by the concept for now.

There is a sort of 'bloop' sound accompanied by the device's abrupt vibration. You _certainly_ do not drop it on the floor before looking around the room woolbeastishly as though you are being watched, and then allow an embarrassing gasp of pain to escape when you bend down to pick it back up. That is _not_ a thing that happens.

Oh.

you... have a message.

someone has just messaged you.

 

gardenGnostic (GG) has opened a relay with  grimAuxiliatrix (GA)

 

GG: oh my god

GG: its been forever but is that actually you?

GA: While It Has Been A Very Long Time Since Our Relatively Brief Friendship

GA: I Must Say That It Is Indeed Me

GA: I Must Also Ask

GA: Is That Actually You

GG: IT IS!! hiii! i just got this program and i didnt expect to

GG: well, i signed on for the very first time today and here you are already!

GG: i knew there had to be others out there somewhere but i just didnt think...

GA: You Felt That You Were Being Overly Optimistic

GG: yes exactly! paradox space is never nice like this, its always mean and unfair

GG: but i guess were not really in paradox space anymore are we

GA: It Would Appear That We Are Not

GA: Is Rose With You

GA: Im Sorry That Was Very Rude

GA: Not To Mention Foolish Seeing As You Are Clearly Alone

GG: awww not really! and yeah im alone over here : (

GG: well i made a friend and shes really nice! just not... one of us, i guess

GG: not somebody who can really understand the situation

GG: rose though? i know you two were friends, but im kinda surprised you started with a human!

GA: Rose And I Grew Very Close The Last Sweep and A Half

GA: To Be Entirely Clear She Is My Matesprit And Vice Versa

GG: :O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GG: OH WOW THATS REALLY CUTE

GG: i sort of wondered when rose was going to admit she wasnt straight <_<;

GA: Im Not Really Sure What That Means

GG: oh its not important that was a silly thing to bring up anyway

GG: my brain is going in a million directions at once, im just really... overwhelmed!!

GG: i feel weird that no one else is showing up as online and im not sure if that means they arent here or if theyre just asleep

GG: but im pretty happy to talk to you! and i did always wish we had gotten to be better friends

GG: you were actually kind of nice to me when the rest of you guys were still being jerks :P

GA: If I Recall The Two Of Us Primarily Discussed Frog Breeding Which Is Not Too Conducive To Nuanced Friendship

GA: But Yes You Are By All Accounts A Tolerable Creature

GG: i just. im like. how do i even say it?

GA: Youre Not Alone

GG: ... yeah. im not, am i? and neither are you!!

GG: have you found anyone else???

GA: Unfortunately Not Yet

GA: I Only Acquired This Device And Application Earlier Today

GG: @_@ whoa really? i got mine literally half an hour ago!!

GG: that is sort of incredible timing, especially since its only been one day

GA: Wait Youve Only Been Here One Night

GA: I Mean Day

GG: yeah, didnt you show up last night too?

GA: I Have Been Here For About A Week

GA: The Experience Was Unique To Say The Least

GG: oh. oh wow and you were alone for all that time? thats awful

GG: but that means that... the others might just not be here yet!! we just need to hang in there

GA: Or Perhaps They Have Arrived Far In The Past And Are Already Dead

GA: Maybe Something Else Equally Daymarish

GG: look i dont really want to think about that idea right now, lets not think about that ok?

GA: Lets Absolutely Not Think About That

GA: Oh Right Lest I Forget

GA: I Am Now Some Kind Of Human Slash Animal Hybrid

GA: So Thats A Thing

GG: youre a faunus now? o_o so am i though

GA: Wait Really

GA: I Think I Assumed You Would Remain Human

GG: yeah really!! and, i think its because i sort of fused with my dog a few years ago

GA: You Did What With Your Dog

GG: anyway the point is i was already part animal so it made sense

GG: maybe you are a faunus because youre a troll?

GA: That Was My Assumption

GA: I Think I Remember The Human Word For This Animal

GA: Unless Im Wrong Then Im Part Bat

GA: Maybe A Vampire Bat

GA: Human Rainbow Drinker Lore Always Seems To Involve Bats

GA: We Called Their Alternian Equivalent Aerial Goredrinkers

GG: well thats intense! animals from your planet all sound like video game monsters

GG: i have doggy ears like i used to, so... what about you?

GA: Well My Horns

GA: I Mean

GA: Well I Have A Bizarre Extra Set Of Bat Ears And I Have Not Entirely Lost My Fangs

GA: Its Rather Interesting To Suddenly And Inexplicably Just

GA: Be Capable Of Making Sense Of Four Sources Of Audio Input At Once

GA: But I Would Much Rather Go Back To Being

GA: You Know

GA: Me

GG: this must be even weirder for you, i hadnt thought about that.

GG: i mean to be honest i didnt change much other than losing my powers and access to my sylladex and stuff

GG: but you lost... um. sorry, i dont know whether you feel like talking about that right now

GA: Its Not Like I Have A Moirail Even If I Wanted To Further Explore The Subject

GA: So Its Pointless To Waste Time Idly Contemplating Misfortune

GG: okay now i feel kind of bad and worried though because that sounded very ominous!

GG: i never got to know you much but this must be so scary

GG: also it sounds kind of like you do want to talk about it but you dont want to admit it

GG: so, are you sure you dont want to talk about it?

GA: As I Said It Is Not An Option And Thus Discussion Of My Desires Would Be Pointless

GA: There Is A Point At Which This Sort Of Thing Becomes Indecent

GA: This Is Rather Explicitly A Friendship

GA: Those Are Typically Wildly Inappropriate Venues For Airing Stupid Personal Problems

GG: kanaya, um, im not sure how to say this... wait thats your name right?please tell me i didnt forget it somehow

GA: No You Remembered It Precisely Which Is Somewhat Of A Relief

GA: You Are Jade Of Course And I Kind Of Know A Lot About You Already

GA: At Least Secondhand

GA: Rose Spoke Of You Often And At Length

GA: So Did Strider Although Perhaps He Spoke Less Coherently

GA: But Lets Be Honest With Ourselves Thats Just How He Is

GA: Im Still Unsure Whether Or Not He Can Be Counted Among The Sane

GG: yeah davesprite sure never got any less crazy D:

GG: oh my god now i wanna know what they said about me though!! aaaahhhh

GG: no ok thats not the point never mind

GG: ugh now youve got me feeling awkward about this topic for no reason!

GG: what i meant to say was

GG: i know its probably really weird to think about but...

GG: basically this whole world has a human point of view on things, or at least something close to it

GG: its not really going to be considered romantic to care about someone and want to help them

GG: or to listen to their problems!

GA: You Are Correct It Is Incredibly Weird To Think About

GA: There Is Absolutely No Circumstance In My Life That Rivals How Weird This Mess Is

GA: Neither Socially Nor Biologically

GA: In Fact Its Highly Disconcerting And Unpleasant

GA: So I Intend To Continue Not Thinking About It Whenever Possible

GG: look what i mean is youre not going to be able to live like that, at least not completely

GG: sorry i know thats terrible to just say and it must suck and im being really blunt, i dont want to make you feel worse

GG: but i think youre going to have to adjust at least somewhat, and the sooner you can do that the better off youll be

GG: if you go around refusing to even talk to your friends about tough things you are going to have a bad time with people and in general

GG: you have to kind of blur the lines youre used to because otherwise youll be miserable!!

GA: I Dont really want To Blur Or Adjust Anything

GA: My Outlook On Life Is not Negotiable

GA: I Am Handling Things perfectly Fine My Own Way

GG: ... i dont even know you very well and i can still tell how not okay you are

GG: you arent even capitalizing things consistently! you missed four words just now

GG: isnt that stuff important to trolls?

GA: That Was A Scroll malfunction Its Nothing

GG: no it wasnt

GA: Yes It Was

GG: no!!!! it wasnt and you know it wasnt!!!!!!!

GA: It Absolutely Was And Im fine Enough To Get By

GG: CAN YOU JUST SHUT UP AND LISTEN ALREADY!!!!!

GA: I

GA: Excuse Me

GG: you heard me dumbass!! i dont like yelling but if i have to channel karkat then ill do it and ill keep doing it as often as i have to!!!

GG: im so sick of people pretending to be okay and then just totally shutting down!

GG: i am NOT going through that again, not even with somebody whos just a friend!!!

GG: so shut the hell up and stop being stupid!! youre the only person ive

GG: i mean i... i just

GA: You Just What

GG: i dont even know if anyone else is going to be here and id really like it if the one person i already know for a fact IS here would be able calm down for one freaking second!!!

GG: and im sorry for being selfish but i really cant deal with that one person i know doing the "ooh im all weird and closed off" thing!

GG: even a human can tell youre not okay! a human who was only your friend for a little while before now, and that was years ago! stop making me yell at you!

GG: just... tell me whats wrong, okay?

GA: God Damn It Why Are You Doing This I Dont Understand

GA: What Possible Non Romantic Motive Could Drive This Behavior

GG: i have had a very weird and kind of stressful if positive day and its making me mad that youre stuck having a crappy time so i want to help!!!!!!!!!!

GA: Oh My God Do You Have Any Idea How That Sounds

GA: Im Sort Of Wondering If You Actually Are Hitting On Me And Just Dont Realize You Mean It

GA: You Know What Fine Ill Play Along

GA: Things Cant Possibly Get Any More Frustrating Or Bizarre From Here

GG: GOOD!!!!!! now im asking ONE MORE TIME and youd better answer

GG: kanaya. what. is. wrong?

GA: What Do You Think Is Wrong

GA: How Could You Even Need To Ask That Question

GA: Obviously Pretty Much Everything Is Wrong

GA: Everyone Is Gone At Least For Now

GA: I Dont Even Know If Rose Is Here Or alive At All And I Miss her

GG: i miss her too. its okay to be lonely

GA: Everything About Me Is A Gross Confusing Disaster

GA: This Is Not My Skeleton Even If Its Similar

GA: This Is Not My Skin And These Are Certainly Not My Eyes

GA: Simply Allowing Myself To Contact My Own Flesh Feels Horribly Off

GA: How Can You Stand Having Such A Thin Epidermis

GA: And Beyond Even That

GA: My Horns Are Gone

GA: Jade My Horns Are Gone

GG: im so sorry D:

GG: i have no idea what that must feel like but it sounds awful

GA: I Dont Understand Anything About This World

GA: How Do I Learn When Almost Everyone Here Is Disgusted That Im Not Human

GA: Im Weak And Easy To Damage And Generally Unlike Myself

GA: A Maddeningly Attractive And Flirty Idiot Girl Stabbed Me And I Almost Died

GA: She Only Got My shoulder but I Still passed Out So Quickly

GA: Whereas I Hit Her In The Torso With A Chainsaw And She Didnt Even Bleed

GA: Then I Woke Up And I Was

GA: Ugh This Might Not Make Very Much Sense To An Ex Human

GA: I Guess The Idea Of A Hospital Is Somehow Reasonable To You

GA: And Rose Has Explained It To Me

GA: Doubtlessly With Some Amusing Falsehoods Sprinkled In

GA: But It Makes Me Feel Very Strange To Have Been There At All

GG: its going to be okay. youre not weak or anything kanaya!! it seems like youre pretty strong

GG: i mean you got through sburb or whatever it was called on your home planet

GG: and you survived your own home planet in general!

GG: i didnt hear all that much about it but it sounded like a really violent and scary place

GA: It Was Constantly Violent

GA: And I Suppose It Could Be Frightening At Times

GA: But Thats Just The Way Things Were

GG: thinking of something as normal doesnt always mean that it was actually okay

GA: I Accidentally Activated My Own Aura While Doing Something Stupid

GA: But I Cant Decide If Im Relieved To Be A Bit More Resilient Again

GA: Or If Im Completely Devastated By How Fundamentally My Very Soul Has Been Modified

GA: Im Trying To Stay Strong And I Dont Think Im Doing It Right

GA: Maybe I Was Never Actually Strong

GG: i really doubt thats true

GA: And Then We Have The Damned Hospital

GA: Helping People Who Were Meant To Die

GA: It Is Bothering Me A Great Deal That I Was In Such A Place

GA: Back Home It Would Have Been Almost Vulgar To Help A Stranger Survive

GA: Well At The Very Least It Would Be To Do So With No Ulterior Motive

GG: thats really sad... shouldnt people who get hurt be helped?

GG: i mean thats when people need kindness the most, probably.

GA: The Point Is That I Dont Understand It At All And I Should Hate The Idea Completely

GA: And I Thought I Did Hate It Even While I Was There

GA: I Should Have Died In That Place Not Been Rescued By Strangers

GA: My Choices Were Poorly Considered And I Should Have Paid For Them

GA: No Matter What You Say That Is Just How The World Is

GG: i really dont think it would be fair to die just for making a few mistakes

GG: you dont have to torture yourself like this!

GA: You Dont Seem To Realize How Humiliating It Is To Need To Be Rescued That Way

GA: My Whole Life Ive Bound My Own Wounds Like Any Troll Would

GA: So Upon Waking I Panicked And Escaped As Quickly As Possible

GA: Obviously I Prefer Living To Dying But

GA: Ugh I Dont Know How To Explain It Any More Clearly

GA: But Then When I Think About Rose Being Mortally Wounded

GA: Or Karkat Or Dave Or Terezi Or The Mayor

GG: when you think about them, then all of a sudden it feels different?

GA: Yeah I Guess So

GG: thats the whole point of a hospital!

GG: so people dont have to cry so much, because things can turn out to be okay

GG: because unfair things happen a lot and no one needs to be left to die!!

GA: That Concept Goes Against Every Single Thing My Species Stands For

GA: And Yet A Part Of Me Seems To Agree With You And That Terrifies Me

GA: Not Only That But I Was Also Recently Accosted By Some Humans And Defeated Them

GA: I Should Have Executed Them Immediately

GA: They Were Complete Strangers Who Attacked Me

GA: I Had Every Right To Take The Safest Option

GA: But I Just Left Them There Instead

GG: you too? the first thing that happened to me here was running into some people who tried to rob me or maybe do something worse

GG: i suddenly got rescued by a girl with a giant scythe though so it wasnt too bad

GA: I Told Myself Some Stupid Excuse To Feel Like It Was Reasonable

GA: So I Guess I Was Trying To Justify It By Placing Myself In A Position Of Superiority

GA: But The Truth Is That They Had No Way To Fight Back Anymore

GA: And I Simply Couldnt Make Myself Do It

GA: I Should Have Been Taking Advantage Of That Very Same Fact

GA: Do I Feel Like This Because I Have Lost My Identity

GA: Or Have I Always Been So Gutless And Broken Without Noticing

GA: Most Of My Life Was Spent In A Remote Location Plagued Only By Daywalkers

GA: So Then Were The Few Trolls I Did Have To Kill Sort Of Lucky Accidents In A Morbid Sense

GA: How Can I Even Tell Which Possibility Is Worse

GG: i dont think its just because your body changed, kanaya! you always seemed very nice

GG: i think you just dont want to have to watch people die because it hurts you to see it

GG: thats not a bad thing, its good to care about people! i dont want to disrespect your culture but some of it is pretty cruel and i dont think those parts need to be there

GG: you shouldnt be mad at yourself for avoiding murder

GG: this is all really scary and weird i know, but its not going to stay this bad forever

GA: Oh Sure Eventually Ill Just Blink And Not Care About My Mutilated Body Anymore I Guess

GA: Horrific Events Are By Far My Favorite Variety

GA: Repeating The Same Empty Sentiment Over And Over Definitely Helps Things

GA: And Is Not Remotely Condescending Or Pointless

GG: trying to be rude isnt going to help things either

GA: Im Sure Your Astonishing Naivete Is On Point And This Will All End In Smiles And Fist Bunps

GA: Whats That You Say

GA: An Offer To Lose Every Single Thing I Have Ever Had While Gaining Nothing In Return

GA: Sign Me The Hell Up

GG: i know youre only being sarcastic because of how much this all sucks

GG: youre not going to be able to make me think you are a jerk! youre really bad at that

GG: ive known someone who was a lot better at it and youre nothing like him

GG: like its so transparent and halfhearted that if it wasnt so sad it would probably be cute

GG: i think dave would call that tsundere? or maybe thats a different thing...

GG: well, the point is

GG: kanaya there is probably no way i can understand what youre going through

GG: but im not wrong! things really dont have to hurt so bad forever, and youre not alone at all okay?

GA: Of Course They Do And Of Course I Am I Might Be The Only Troll On This Entire Planet

GA: As Though It Were Not Already Enough That My Species Was Doomed To Begin With

GA: All I Can See Is Loss And More Loss

GA: my Horns Are Gone

GA: So Are Other Things

GG: wait, what other things could be... oh.

GG: ohhhhh. oh god, wow.

GG: im so sorry holy crap

GA: So Am I

GA: Constantly

GA: Im Constantly Fu

GA: Ugh I Hate This Continuums Rules So Much

GA: Im Constantly Freaking Sorry About That And About Everything Else I Can Think Of

GA: Meanwhile My Own Thoughts Continue To Betray Me

GA: Doesnt It Horrify You That There Are Words That Are Suddenly Off Limits

GA: The Way Your Pan Twists Around Them Even If You Try

GG: yeah the weird language stuff is really unsettling i kinda cant argue that point

GG: if karkats here he must being going totally nuts

GG: also i like that term, i was thinking 'reality' but 'continuum' sounds way smoother

GG: i wish i was there id like to hug you or something D:

GG: sorry im not sure im much good with words and the truth is im really scared and sad too

GG: but i want to be optimistic about this!!

GG: youre here and im here, why would there only be two of us?

GG: i refuse to believe anyone got stuck far enough in the past to be dead or anything!!!!!

GG: so im not giving up hope! i just found you so neither of us is alone anymore

GG: and i swear im not hitting on you right now but i do care about you even if i dont know you very well yet

GG: youre nice and you deserve for someone to care if youre in pain!!!

GA: Im Sorry This Is

GA: This Is Rather Intense And I

GA: I Dont Really

GA: How Can Your Species Say These Things And Not Mean Them Romantically

GA: Are You Listening To Yourself At All

GA: But

GA: Im Not Sure Im EVen Totally uncomfortable With It And That Doesnt Make Any Sense

GA: I really Dont Think Of Myself As The Promiscuous Type

GA: Am I A Terrible Person I Mean This Is Essentially A One Day Stand

GG: no, youre not terrible!

GG: and i guess our cultures are just really really different, but you still matter

GG: it matters to me that youre hurting

GG: and its okay to let me care even if im not dating you or whatever

GA: But I

GA: What Am I Supposed To Feel Right Now

GA: I Cant Even Be Of Use In Return

GA: God Am I Not Listening To Myself Either

GA: Youre Not Even Pale For Me So Why Do I Give A Damn

GA: Its

GA: None Of It Makes Sense

GG: nothing in life makes much sense kanaya!! ive finally figured that one out

GG: also youre already helping me just by openly existing on this planet, soooo <_<;

GA: Once Again Are You Entirely Sure Youre Not Making An Advance Here

GA: I Almost Feel Dizzy Reading This Stuff

GA: I Have Legitimately Never Heard Anything That Filthy Outside Of Pornography

GA: Which I Definitely Have Never Watched Even A Little Bit For The Record

GG: im sure you havent ; )

GA: Look Ill Try To At Least

GA: Think About What You Said

GA: I Owe You That Much And More

GG: thats a lot better than what ive gotten out of anybody else in life!

GG: ill take it :D

GG: okay um i know youre still busy feeling crappy and this is really a really sudden topic change but it might actually cheer you up

GG: so can i... ask you something a little dumb?

GA: Of Course

GG: its more like asking for a favor than asking a regular question

GG: its also more like a couple questions glued together

GA: Jade I Spilled A Whole Weeks Problems On You

GA: This Cant Be More Worthy Of Anxiety Than That

GA: Gnaw The Projectile And Ask Already

GG: where are you right now?

GA: Im In Atlas

GG: argh crap im in vale and i think thats pretty far

GG: ... alright, i want to spend more time considering this in case im being dumb, so i dont want to say anything final

GG: but i think ive already pretty much decided what i want to do with my life here

GA: With Your Life Here

GA: So You Have Given Up Hope Of Finding A Way Back

GG: no thats not true at all

GG: but i do have a bad feeling it wont be easy

GG: and a weird sense that i might have done some awful things and forgotten about them

GG: so if i cant think of some way to keep myself motivated ill go crazy!

GG: i can always just quit if i change my mind, plus i really need a less temporary place to stay

GA: You Still Havent Asked Me Anything

GA: Although Yes It Would Be Ideal To Have A Stable Base Of Operations

GG: i guess asking you to do this too is selfish and a little silly but at the same time theres no question that youre qualified

GG: and it would be really nice to have someone near me who knows who i really am

GG: the most important part of my idea though, i think

GG: is that i feel like if were going to understand what happened to us and why it happened at all then we are going to need to become powerful again

GG: and this is probably the best way to start doing that!

GA: I Have No Idea Where You Are Going With This

GA: Youre Starting To Make It Sound Ominous

GA: Since Im Pretty Sure Thats Not Your Intention Please Just Say It Already

GA: What Is This Laboriously And Anxiously Built Up Multiple Part Question Slash Decision

GG: well... first off............

GG: how much do you know about huntresses?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "span" is never going to look like a word to me again as long as i live  
> if i was a type-moon character my natural enemy would be listed as "ao3 formatting"


	18. Huntress x Huntress (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted this to be a longer chapter, but it just worked out this way. Now that V4 is over I can hopefully get more actual RWBY-related writing done, since I don't have to worry that I'll post something and have it brutally contradicted by canon two days later. Now things can get brutally contradicted by canon _next fall_ , which is a little better.
> 
> *Edit on 12/17/2017: added a fantastic piece of fanart of the end scene by pearlmythos.tumblr.com !!!! *

_i know that you're hiding, i know_

_there's a part of you that i just cannot reach_

_you don't have to let me in_

_just know that i'm still here_

 

florence + the machine - hiding

 

* * *

RWBY

 **N** JKA

* * *

 

**29 Days Prior to Beacon**

**Morning**

 

You are being as pawsitive as anymoby could _ever_ hope to be, but...

"I _reely_ hate this sector," you whine. Blake shoots you a dirty look that turns into a weirded out look, and you shrug. What are you supposed to do about that _now_ _?_ If it sucks, it sucks. Also, you think maybe aliens don't use the word 'sector' like that. At least not in _this_ city.

"No, really! It's gross and dirty and there are too many sounds and people and this crappy dust is terribubble and dirty and everything smells like pee. This is why people should just live in _cave_ _s_ like they're _sane_." The look you get says that you're definately not sane for living in a cave.

She gives you a lot of _looks_ , you're noticing, and it's... finally starting to get to you, honestly.

"It's not _our_ fault we can barely survive here, and if it bothers you so much –"

"Then I'll go live in a _cave,_ _"_ you say, and she snorts a little. Sea! She doesn't have to be a jerk aboat _everything._ Maybe putting up with her confusingness isn't _litter-ally_ impossible, just... very, very annoying? You hope?

"Nepeta... if you really want to try to get a scroll _today,_ we have to actually _do_ something."

Oh, _reely?_ You never would've guessed! What, does she think you're just cat-sitting here thinking about _nofin?_

"Well maybe it wouldn't be so hard if I could get a breath of clean air!"

She sighs and a little part of you wouldn't mind clawing her in the face. Not a _lot_ of clawing, just... you know. Enough to make her either stop being a jerk or pull herself together and _commit_ to it. Either way is better than _this._

"Think, think... there's _somefin_ I could do, I'm sure! It's _right_ on the clawtip of my tongue. Or, my pan, I guess? Whatever." Wandering the streets in the lowblood part of the city _has_ been helping you think. Maybe. It definitely doesn't mako it _harder_ to think so it can't hurt, right? Right!

Well, it looks like it can be _annoying_ _,_ though, for _some_ people. Blake keeps rubbing her temples, looking... well, annoyed! But you won't get caught in the undertow. You had an _exciting_ night, and now you know some things! Like how you're only _almost_ completely and meowserably alone. And Aradia's been here longer than you, so she even had some advice on dealing with humans! And faunus! Aliens in general.

And now you really, _finally_ understand the big pictshore on this planet. _Every inch of it_ is just _crawling_ with purrey. Yeah! Focus on _that_ for a second. You don't have to be impatient. You have _the best hunting grounds imaginable_ waiting for you.

"Just to be shore," you say real slow, for probably the third or fourth time, "they're _everywhere?_ And I could get _rewards_ for harpooning them all?" It will be _tidally_ obvious how disappointed you are if she was toying with you or you were just being dumb and over-excited; you're bassically vibrating. You did this the last few times you asked, too. How could you _not?_

Blake watches you reel carefullyfor a few seconds befur nodding in a kind of resigned way, like she's just waiting for you to be _too weird_ at her again. You swallow a little trickle of annoyance. Okay, it's more than a little, now. A lot more.

This is how it _always_ is. It was like this before, so of course it's like this on this planet. You clawlready _knew_ it would be. So this is... like just barely scraping yourself on a broken branch; it stings, yeah, but you won't be choking on it like a furball. It won't get in the way of the _hunt._

"They don't bleed right, and you can't paint things with them or even eat them... but... you can still hunt them. And it's even _better_ than that, in its own way!"

... You've caught some wind in your sails, and now there's no stopping you. She eyes you susfishiously, the only way she ever does.

"How is any of this a _good thing?"_

This would be a _great_ time to have stuff to scratch at. Scratch at because you are _very excited!_ Not at all beclaws she's so frustratingly cynical and might look _great_ without a face. You work through it by returning to stalking the concrete even faster. She has to put more effurt into following you, with the four inches you've got on her, but she's not a pupa. She can keep up.

If she even _wants_ to.

"These things have no place in the ecological tangle and they only seem to exist to be a threat to, whale, _you_ , so you can just cut loose when the urge to kill something is driving you nuts, and not even worry about _wasting_ any part of the animal!"

Blake sighs. She has a couple of sighs, you've charted; this is the one you get when you're _being practical_ but she still doesn't approve.

She leads you a little out of the way to the mouth of an empty alley. Probably being too _loud_ for her taste. That little imaginary scrape feels a little imaginarily deeper.

"Look, Nepeta, you're... you're not _wrong_ , but that's not the mindset a Huntress should have. This is about protecting the people –"

" _Not only that,"_ you say, loudly, "I didn't really have anything to do here but waste time befur, and now I know I can be an _official Huntress!_ It's what I would've done _anyway!"_

Plus Aradia wants to do it for her own weird reasons so that's even better, and you're even _luckier_ that the first frond you made here came to the city to do the _exact same thing!_ It all just suddenly... fell into place, like it was destiny or something. And Blake _is_ a nice gill! She's a kitty like you, which is furry cool even if she's kind of... bossy? Prickly? It's hard to find the right word.

She does make it hard to forget the _actshoal_ hard part of your life is still dealing with aliens. Sure, you understand some things, but how do you actually use that infurmation? How do you... learn make any purrogress without forgetting little parts of yourself along the way?

For example, there's this Blake girl! She's been so generous and nice to you that it's creepy, but then... aliens are just _like_ that sometimes? Apparently? And that's just, well, how do you _adapt_ to that? To being helped out by some stranger who doesn't even seem to _like_ you very much? Do you _want_ to adapt? Can you just get _used_ to that kind of thing catpunning and it only being... _friendly,_ or in her case maybe just being _polite?_ If you can't, there's going to be some catlateral damage, and if you do, then... what happens to Nepeta the troll? What happens to what's left of...

... no, you keep _doing_ this, and you are too _busy_ to be worrying.

"Anyway, pawbviously I'll go do that, but like I was spraying before, I still need a hus – a scroll as soon as I can get one.For reasons." You wait for her to tense up, and oh, there it is. That specific set to her pawsture that means she's bracing for your next _horrible revelation!_

... It's starting to hurt for real, now, that imaginary scrape that's becoming more of a cutsinking deeper intoyour chest. This is getting to be... a little bit _not good._

It doesn't hurt any less when she torpedoes your furst few ideas.

 

* * *

**Fifteen minutes later**

 

You're _trying_ to figure out how to get a scroll, and you're still trying _so_ hard to be pawsitive, you really _are,_ but your head won't cooperate at all and it's so _unfair_ and _frustrating to admit,_ but... you are just not doing such a great job of being fin anymore. Why not just admit it?

Like, you tried really hard, too! Tried and _tried!_ It took _nights_ of nonsense to wear you down, plus way worse things have happened to you before all of this, so how come you can't just _smile_ right now? You got beaten to death by a clown and didn't feel all _that_ bad about it later, so why is _this_ stuff like an anchor that never should've been dropped?

... Ocray, it's... because of _her,_ and you know that. You're not very good at lion to yourself, anymore. Not since Feferi, not after someone knew _everything_ , even stuff you didn't know aboat yourself, and was... okay with it, after eeling the _inside._ Not since you had access to all the memories of a gill who _wasn't_ treated as a joke by her fronds.

So you _know_ it's Blake that's sinking you. Why is it so bad? Beclaws she obviously _pities_ you and not even in the _right_ way! You totally make her uncatfurbell, it's easy to see, and it just... yeah, she's been helping you out, but it's starting to make you sort of quietly _depressed_ to be treated like this, to just get lead around and lectured like some _wriggler_.

This is all just... very _furmiliar._

"... Listen," she says, and you try not to bristle at the cod-escension in her tone, "Whatever you end up planning, if it's not crazy, I... could probably help?"

And that's just _it_. That's _it,_ you've been struggling to stay calm for _too_ long, and you _crack._ You tried! You seariously _tried,_ but of course it wasn't enough and here you are hissing at her anyway, not to mention trying to flare fins that aren't there, because even if the world stole your species, it couldn't steal your species's _temper_.

"... no."

She blinks as you come to a sudden stop in the windingwooden maze between hives, tenses up. Well _good!_ She should!

"What do you mean –"

"I mean quit it with the bad cattitude! Just _listen to me!_ If you _are_ my furriend then act like it a little!" Blake stares at you for a few long secods, opens her mouth, and you cut her off. How does _that_ feel? How's it eel to be the one getting talked over for once?

You can feel your weak dull claws digging into your palms. It's almost a good feeling.

"You keep being all _nice_ and _conchsiderate_ and _civilized,_ you're even _buying_ me things, and then two seconds later you look at me like I'm apawling to hear! I can _tail_ you're only doing it because you feel like you have to and honestly you are sending a _lot_ of mixed signals and it's just _stupid!"_

"I... That's not it, I, I just wanted to..." She looks sort of hurt, brittle as ice over water, and you _don't care._ "Why do you think it's _wrong_ to want to help someone who needs help?"

 _"Who knows?_ Not _you_ , since you never follow up on any of the questions that mean anything _._ No one asks me anyfin that matters! And why would they? They just see the _weird_ girl, someone who gives them an excuse to feel all _supurrior_. _"_

... This isn't aboat her anymore, is it? You guess it never entirely was, not reely.

Well, _fine._ If she's the one who finally gets to be your scratching post, then that's just _too bad._

Something gross and hot and tarry is making waves from a dark place in your bonecage, the place where that cut's gone deep enough to scrape on bone. You feel like crying, and maybe you _would_ cry if you weren't so _mad._ How long were you supposed to keep acting like things were wondfurful when nobody really gave a _damn_ about you in the first place?

"That's _not_ what I'm doing. I don't think you're _inferior_ to me, I... you just reminded me of... well –"

" _Oh!_ I reminded you of something! Well concatulations to me, I get to be a tool to make _you_ eel better about whatever stupid things _you_ did in your life."

"That's... insane. I swear that's not what I'm..." You just stare while she trails off, watch her eyes go a tuna bit wide, head slowly tilting down.

Yep. That's what you thought.

"Okay then. Look me right in the eyes and tell me that's not the reason."

She doesn't respond, just keeps shrinking into herself, and you almost feel gillty about it, but no, you know what? You don't _have_ to, and you _won't. Fefurry_ didn't get this kind of treatment and you don't plan on purrtending _you're_ willing to take it either! Maybe you needed that whole new frame of refurence to see how _mean_ your 'friends' always were, but you finally _got_ it and you finally _get it._

"Do it if you can! Come on! Do it _right now."_ Everything feels very _fast_ , blood pumping through your skull, stormy and righteous, dragging fuzzy memories together. "Or maybe we could _roleplay_ through it! That always worked when _I_ wanted to talk about somethin impurrtant but I knew no one would pay any attention."

"... Wait, _roleplay?_ What are you talking abou–"

"You could be like Terezi! She was _such_ a _great_ furriend, she'd roleplay fun stuff all the time and she was even _great_ at toying with the _dumb nutjob!_ Like I didn't _know_ it was mostly ironic." You take a step toward her and when she takes a step back you follow and put your paw down _hard._ "So what aboat you? I don't know who _you_ want me to be, Blake, but it's not – it's _not_ who I am!"

You wait, wide-eyed and clear and fur-ious, and you could choke on the black goo bubbling up in the back of your throat. Maybe you will. Maybe you don't _care._

Blake doesn't say word. She just keeps makoing herself smaller and smaller, edging toward a wall, and when you finally start to move, she flinches away.

... You think there's something familiar about that, too... and then you realize what it is. The way she's moving reminds you of Tavros, how he'd haul in his shoulders whenever Vwiskers was around, like she wouldn't notice him if he was just a tuna bit tinier, like he was one wrong noise away from being yelled at and pushed around.

Oh. So it's... like that.

Well, you know what? _That's not your purroblem._

"When – when I was younger, I knew..." she says, infur-iatingly slow and careful, back pressing up against some brickwork, "I... I just... I mean – in the forest, when we met, you _looked_ at me and I thought I was about to die. I really did. It felt like an instinct. Felt... well... _familiar._ "

You wonder what her ears are doing under that stupid bow. She smells like cat and dusty old books and a lot of fear.

"There's only one other person I know who can... _do_ that. Who can just look at you and... make everything shut down. And I want to think – I..."

It's hard to describe the sad little noise that slips out of her throat. It's sort of clawful to hear.

Her mouth moves but nothing comes out, and she gives up on trying eelily fast, slumping down the wall onto the concrete like a psionic got their paws on her mind and then didn't give it any orders.

... well. You're _not_ her moireel, not even some dumb alien version of it, so maybe you're wrong... but...

You know what that's _like,_ is all. When something is awful and you just... _can't_ talk about it. When that opcean just doesn't exist, no matter _what_ you do.

Whatefur, you're tired of standing around anyway. You can't kelp it if you're tired. And there's a purrfectly inviting wall to sit against. And okay. Maybe you feel just a _little_ krillty. But you're still _mad!_ It's not like this _changes_ anything, so you're still mad, and maybe that's why your dumb mouth starts saying even dumber stuff clawl on its own.

"I'm tired of being overlooked. Or being looked at like I'm barely even a purrson. Oh hey, there's Nepeta, the same old dumb catgirlwho's just too silly and weird to _matter!_ People called me furreds I don't even _know!_ All I knew was that they were supposed to make me feel _bad."_

You sigh andthwack your tail into the floor fromside to side, just to have some distraction. You _like_ having a tail that's not metal, it's one of the few mice things about all of this, but you do also sort of miss being able to smash rocks and wood with it.

"Have you ever known somemoby and, and they meant everything to you? _Reely_ meant everything, like you couldn't even imagine what it would be like if they were gone? And then suddenly they _are_ gone and nothing make sense, and time keeps pouring on for the rest of the world while you're taking a stupid catnap alone beclaws you don't know what to do with yourself, and..."

You never knew talking could feel so much like puking, but that's... sort of what you're doing now, isn't it? Puking up a little bit of that hateful black sludge inside, and like hacking up a hairball, you can't make it stop until it's good and ready to.

"And then the more you think about that one big fish, the more it's like... not like you don't care or _never_ cared _,_ but like moby they just... weren't really who you thought they were? Who you needed them to be?"

"... I... What do you want me to..."

She looks a little gutted, and part of you's glad. _Let_ someone else feel bad for a while. Maybe stealing the _ugly_ part of people's hearts is what you're really meant to do, dragging them out with your fangs and then shoving them into everyone else.

You hope not. You hope so. It feels like there's not enough of Nepeta Leijon left for it to mean anything anyway.

"... and that was the _one person_ you thought undertowstood you. Who'd bother taking care of you. Who paid any attention at all. The one thing that made it all worth it when you spent the rest of your time purrtending at least your _friends_ could maybe be happy with each other, since you never would be. Ever. Except for... him."

You're melting from the inside out in all the worst ways, you can _tail,_ and suddenly you wonder just _how long_ all of this was really there in you, canned down below everything else. It's weird to surprise yourself with something you already knew. Fefeta didn't want to think about moireels at all, but Nepeta... maybe Nepeta _does_.

"If half of who you are is reely just who your mo – your... your..." You have to do it. Even if it hurts, _especially_ if it hurts, because you _want_ to survive here whether it makes you a stray or not and you don't even _care_ about getting 'home' anymore beclaws there _is_ no 'home' and you don't want to be alone and you don't want to just _fail conchpletely_ at being a faunus the way you failed at being a troll. And what you want to say is hard to shove past your fangs, and what comes out isn't what you _wanted_ even if you do mean it. "Your _b-best friend –_ "

But it won't come out, not without you _forcing_ it, and so you blurt out the other thought prowling in the back of your pan instead. "... Whatever. Moby I should be _glad_ I'm lost in some weird place that doesn't make any sense, just so there's a chance I could get to finally _be someone_ here. I otter have _at least_ six lives left, maybe _seven."_

This all feels like a _dream_. Not like dreaming on Purrse or in the void or wherever Aradia is when she's doing her thing, like an actual _normal_ dream. The kind where the world's all tilted and seasick and you're not yourself, you're all mixed-up and wrong and doing things you'd never do for real – like right now with this horrible painful gross _gigantic pale come-on_ – cod, it almost qualifies as _asexual assault_ – but it's not even _weird_ to do this stuff anymore, not to anyone else! It's probubbly weird to be this _intense,_ but...

Fin! _Fin._ She can be nobody all that speshell to you and you can just be a replacement for whatever jerk she thinks she let down, and... and... and you launch right back into what you couldn't say befur, force out the last sea-ring blob of twistedness you can handle right now.

"If half of you is... if all that stuff is really just make-believe, if so much of your life is just what your b... _best friend_ wanted to see, then take him away and... who's the purrson left behind? Who _are_ you?"

Not that any of this will make sense to her. She doesn't have the conchtext, and even if she did it's not like it would matter. They're... they're all the same, aren't they? Everyone who isn't you. Or is it just that you're _different?_ That you're _not_ good enough, just like how your so-called 'fronds' always knew you weren't? Does it even matter when it's never going to change?

... There's a weird sound. It's a sound you recognize, because there was a time in your life when you made it a lot, more than you told anyone, even Equihiss. A weak muffled sniffling. You turn to look at Blake, and you completely expect to be wrong about the reason for that sound...

... but you're _not_ wrong.

You just thought that if anyone was going to start crying, it would've been _you._

And guess what? You're still Nepeta Leijon! You're a failure as a troll and you're a failure as pretty close to everything, but someone's... someone's both your friend _and_ crying and you're some kind of deviant and you always _knew_ you were one at least a little bit and hearing this stuff makes you want to... make it better, somehow, even when that's impossible, even if someone doesn't want it, even though a minute ago you wanted to claw off her face.

You're such a bottomfeeder for even _thinking_ about doing this. You're pawthetically bad at staying angry at _anyone._

So your tail... goes back to doing what it's meant to, and you look at her again, this girl who's crying while you sit here not even tidally sure why, who can't even stand up from how sad she is, who has that _look_ that you _know_ because you've seen it on yourself, the one that means even if she _wants_ to say it, she just _can't,_ your thoughts are caught up in these weird, meandering circles, and you...

... sigh and try to smile for a second – not a tenth the smile Feferi could make, that _Fefeta_ could – but the best you can do fur yourself _now._ You doubt she even sees it, all crumpled up with one arm curled around her legs and the other one forgotten off to the side, so you're sure she doesn't see you doing it to try to mako _yourself_ feel better, but you still turn away, awkward and flushing so hard your face burns, epinephrine still rustling under your skin.

When you carefully set your hand on top of hers, wondering what the shell you're _thinking,_ she twitches and hiccups, but she doesn't pull away.

You are literr-aly the worst, you don't even know why you _care,_ a minute ago you were practically _yelling_ at her and you're so screwed up for feeling just a tuna bit better all of a sudden, feeling less terrible _yourself_ because she feels terrible _too_ , you're screwed up in so many more ways than you ever totally reelalized you were and you're not going to make this, like, a _thing_...

But she doesn't pull away, and somehow that's the only part that matters.

**[amazing fanart courtesy of pearlmythos.tumblr.com !!!!](http://pearlmythos.tumblr.com/post/168617082275/lionheartedfic-luv-your-work) **


	19. Huntress x Huntress (3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short one to conclude Huntress x Huntress.

 

_you can't tell what the controls hide_

_from the door that locks from the outside_

_but you'll know why, one day when_

_when you cross the line into godsend_

 

[the new pornographers – the new face of zero and one](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iH7K4oglMSo)

 

* * *

RWB **Y**

NJKA

* * *

**29 Days Prior to Beacon**

**Late Night**

 

_You hate hospitals. Seriously, you_ really _hate hospitals. The nasty over-clean smell of everything, the feeling of dread and hopelessness that hangs all over sick and injured people, the way patients just stare at nothing or blankly watch TV like people with broken souls._

_And you're here exactly because of a_ literally _broken soul. You're the one who broke it, too, or at least you might as well have been the one. Like the details matter anymore when they're only 'pretty sure' your little sister, your_ everything _, is gonna wake up._

_'Pretty sure.' You are not cool with how much room that leaves for death._

_This is why you can't let yourself forget that you're pretty much the single parent in this household for one single freaking second: because as soon as you take your eyes off her, something like_ this _might happen. You thought it was bad enough almost getting both of you killed chasing your mom. At least you can blame your age for some of that. You don't have an excuse now, not when you're already_ fourteen.

_All you wanted was some time to yourself. That was all and this is what it gets you: a stupid sister who thinks trying to practice on live Grimm is a good idea lying in a hospital bed with aura exhaustion and guts that would've spilled out if they hadn't stitched her back together fast enough._

_At least Dad didn't make you go home or anything. Speaking of Dad... somebody's knocking, and he's still asleep in his chair. That's weird. Usually something like that would have him alert in an instant._

_... Wait. Were there always two doors in this room?_

The constant beeping noises stop. Ha. Funny. You've sat here for so long you got used to them and you're only noticing now that they're gone. Should you be panicking over that? You think you'd totally freak, but you don't. No, you... suddenly don't feel like anything here matters at all. The whole room's gone all weird and _fake,_ almost like it's a _dream_ or...

_Thunk. Thunk._

Oh holy hell it's happening again. This is two nights in a row, so you're either having some _really_ weird adventures with your subconscious lately or the girl from last night is completely legit. You hope she's legit, because you could really go for something to do that's both interesting and _not terrifying._ Something fun that _doesn't_ end in paranoia.

_Thunk. Thunk. Thunk._

Maybe she's a succubus? Like, if those are real, that would _definitely_ not be boring. But does she really have to show up _here?_ This is a dream, right? Can't you –

_Thunk thunk thunk thunk_

– _ugh_ okay that's driving you crazy you don't even care anymore. ~~Yang~~ Yank that door open. Who even cares about awkwardness, anyway.

Yeah that's... that's definitely her. She gives you a huge wave, as if you're not a foot away from her.

"Told you I'd be back! Mind if I step in?"

"Uh... go for it."

She sweeps right past you and instantly starts looking around the room. Okay, you've changed your mind, this isn't gonna work. You're not interested in hanging out with _anybody_ inside a freeze-frame of one of the worst memories of your entire life.

"This is a dream, right?"

She stares at you like you're an alien or something.

"Well, yeah! Or at least it _was_ a dream. I'm not actually sure what you'd call it now!"

"Then I should be able to change stuff around, right? Does this count as like, lucid dreaming?"

What's-her-name shrugs. You're gonna need to ask her name again, it was way too weird to remember for more than five minutes.

"Probably! I think you can make this pretty much any memory you've ever had."

"And how do I do that?"

She shrugs. Awesome. Thanks. Real big help there, dream ghost girl.

Okay, so you probably have to visualize stuff or do some meditation thing. That's how this crap works in anime, and honestly if you can't live your life by anime then why are you even alive? So... picture something. Focus on it. Do some kind of brain magic. There's uh, totally no hospital here! None at all. You think maybe you're in, like, the woods instead? If you're in the woods then there must be grass and trees and that specific smell to the acres around your house in the summer, bugs and birds clicking and chirping, a bright sun –

"Ooooh, not bad at all," creepy girl says with a really weird half-whistle.

Whoa. It seriously worked. You actually _are_ in the woods on a summer day. Okay, that's kind of awesome and you're totally going to abuse this if you get another chance to, the possibilities are _endless._ For now, though, you'll just go find a tree to lean against.

"Right, so what was your name again?"

She grins and it's just as toothy and off-putting as it was before. _Sweet._

"Aradia Megido! And you're... hmm. Whoops! Sorry, I've been visiting a _lot_ of dreams lately. I think your name starts with a Y?" A lot of dreams? What in the... well, she did say that was her Semblance, didn't she? She must hate being bored as much as you do. Or maybe she's a psychopath or a dream monster or not real at all. Those are still possibilities.

"It's Yang. Yang Xiao Long. The one and only."

Aradia nods happily and sits down on a nice, sturdy nothing. Alright, sure, go for it. Break every law of physics, why not?

... Huh. She has a thin sheath at her right hip and what looks like a magnum or a revolver holstered on her left. Those definitely weren't there before. Does that reflect some change in her actual life?

"Hey, you didn't have the weapons last time. What's that about?"

Her head dips while she inspects her own gear.

"Well, the gun is for medium ranged murders, and the other one is for close ranged murders!"

Um. That sure is a thing to say.

"Those _are_ for fighting Grimm, right?" There's ought to be an ellipsis here, followed by a more concerned _'right?',_ but you don't feel like actually letting those get past your teeth.

"Oh sure, mostly," she says, and, well. Yeah, alright, you'd be a serious hypocrite if you acted like there was something wrong with being prepared to beat the living crap out of other people. Or even... like there was something wrong with _intending_ to knock somebody's teeth out, either. You'll just play it safe and nod. Wait, that implies some things...

"So does that make you a Huntress?"

"Almost, but not yet!" She is now poking a tree, and you have no idea how to respond to that kind of behavior. "The fall semester at Beacon doesn't start for twenty nine days."

...

It takes a minute for _that one_ to sink in.

 

* * *

RWBY / NJKA

~{ **O** }~

* * *

**29 days prior to Fall semeste** r

 

For the second time in two nights, someone knocks on your office door in your dreams. You can't help but chuckle to yourself; you rather doubt that _another_ person with a vanishingly rare Semblance has chosen this moment to appear. Well, no point in delaying the enjoyable, now is there?

Ah, yes. There she is, cheerful as last time, waving her arm out in the darkness between dreams. There _is_ one marked difference, however: tonight she comes before you bearing arms.

"Hello~!"

You attempt to be at least mildly stern, but it's not easy to do so when you're facing a smile like that.

"I believe I implied that I would prefer our next meeting take place outside of my manifested consciousness."

She shrugs. There's something just slightly off about the way she does it, however; in fact, there's something off about most of her movements. Interesting.

"Yeah, I know! Sorry about that. It's just that I'm inside an aerial passenger transport vehicle right now, so there really aren't any official channels to go through!"

_Very_ interesting. You lean a bit on your cane and motion for her to continue; you will never allow another mind to enter this place, but speaking through the door is no particular issue.

"Right, so... three of my friends and I want to go to your school, but we're all crazy and don't legally exist! Is there some kind of test to take for that, or should we try somewhere else?"

It's perhaps unprofessional of you, but you find yourself chuckling once again. Her candid nature is fascinating, though you're not sure how to feel about her casting aspersions on the sanity of her own friends. She did include herself, however, and not in a disparaging manner, so you can only assume her outlook on such things is different than the average teenager's.

"Unfortunately, my academy does not accept further applicants within the month preceding its new year." Truly a shame, however; whether or not the four of them became their own team, that number is perfect for the environment...

Well, you've always been one to bend your own rules. Why stop now?

"However, considering that only two days have passed since that deadline, I could be convinced to allow for one last round of testing, provided you and your friends are able to arrive within the next day or so."

Her face rises, then falls.

"Well, I should be in Vale by tomorrow, and... well, two of us are there already, but one of my friends is sort of stuck in Atlas. I don't think she can make it here without another couple of weeks gathering currency to pay for transport!"

An even worse shame. Frankly, your initial impressions of this girl have left you with the gut feeling that she is more than capable of studying to become a Huntress, and it would not surprise you if her friends were equally prepared. As odd as her movements can be, she carries herself with an unmistakable fighter's calm, the stance of someone who is perfectly capable of changing gears from casual to battle-ready in less than a second, _without_ any greater associated paranoia.

... Hmm.

As much as he can frustrate you, James has _excellent_ testing standards for his own school, and there are few left in the world who are half as capable of assessing combatants. Perhaps you could call in a favor, from one friend to another... he won't be happy about it, but he certainly does owe you. You suppose this is your greatest flaw and your only strength: an overabundance of sympathy.

Glynda is going to be very, _very_ unhappy with you come morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time on Lionhearted: "Keep Moving Forward"!


	20. Keep Moving Forward (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here is the "k" trailer  
> coming up in an unrevealed order: the "j", "n", and "a" trailers

  _if you really want to seek the heart that guides you_

_take a chance with your life_

_and believe your calling tonight_

_this is the path to your future_

 

_[survive said the prophet - if you really want to](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JC7K19rWL-k) _

 

* * *

RWBY

NJ **K** A

* * *

  **27 Days Prior to Beacon**

**Evening**

 

You are seated at a rather large table in what may as well serve as a military compound, across from a highblood general who has very little reason to consider you anything but a nuisance, in your absolute best case scenario.

This is not the most terrified you've ever been, but it's the most terrified any single person in _this_ world has ever left you. There is a very limited knowledge base for you to draw on for etiquette in these situations where humans are concerned; were this an Alternian general you would shut up, listen, speak only when spoken to, and attempt to emotionally prepare for the very real possibility of instant death. Humans seem... _gentler_ , overall, but you suspect if there is any place exceptions might be found, it would have to be in their military.

... For god's sake, the man's name is even _eight letters long._ You are aware that your own cultural assumptions have no relevance to that, but your instincts are screaming the opposite. Your claws dig into your palms, mildly more useful now that you've carefully groomed them into sharp points.

Just as you're distracting yourself by wondering why he appears to be hiding his extensive cybernetics – obvious, when they're far colder than the rest of him –he finally speaks.

"I'm going to assume you understand how abnormal this is," he says. His voice is... _large_ , perhaps that's the best word, and like everything else about him, it registers in your mind mostly by translating to 'ADULT', which is then translated into extreme fear.

You simply nod. Best to keep things simple, show due respect while avoiding as many opportunities to screw up as possible. His demeanor seems unaffected; you'll consider that a success.

"In that case, since you've been... _vouched for,"_ one eye twitching ever so slightly, "I'd like to start by asking you a few questions."

Oh. Well, this sure is precisely what you had hoped to avoid.

"I'm told that you quote unquote _'don't legally exist.'_ Why?"

You do your best not to hesitate. The rhythm of conversation is vital to avoiding or inciting violence, and right now you're attempting to manage the former.

"Until very recently, I had never visited one of the four Kingdoms. I have so far been unable to safely incorporate myself into the legal system." _G_ _od,_ you hope that came out neutrally enough.

"You would have most likely been recorded in a census of various villages near the Kingdoms. Seeing as you weren't, I'd like to know where you _did_ grow up."

"Somewhere else," you say, and then go rigid with shock. How? How did that slip out? You couldn't even handle _two questions_ _!_ All you had to do was _think_ for a moment, and now you're probably... oh no oh no he's narrowing his eyes –

"Surviving family or relatives?"

... you do your best to breathe. This isn't over yet. You still have a chance.

"None."

He nods, seeming vaguely distracted for a second or two.

"Combat experience?"

"Extensive. I defended my hi – home for the majority of my life, and have dispatched a great number of monsters since."

"Can you be more specific about that number?"

"I didn't count, but I would estimate no less than two thousand and no more than four thousand."

"Weapon of choice?"

"Chainsaw."

... There is something to be said about the efficiency of military communications. The simplicity at work here might be most of why you've been able to stay composed, frankly.The sooner this is over, the sooner you'll know today is not the day you die.

Oh god, you really want this to be over. Please, _please_ let this be over soon.

"Alternate functions?"

"None so far. I do have ideas."

"Do you have experience or noteworthy skill at fighting humans and faunus?"

"Yes."

Suddenly he's leaning forward – into your space? no, not that close, not so close as to provoke a reflexive attack – and staring directly into your eyes. If not for your aura, your claws would be unintentionally spilling some of your own blood beneath the table.

"Have you ever _killed_ a human or faunus?"

... The answer is _technically_ no, but you're not stupid. That aside, considering that trolls appear to _be_ faunus in this world, you may as well have killed 'other faunus.' You have no idea what the correct answer to this question is, and if you try to think about it, you'll only hinder yourself.

He's military. He knows perfectly well that you've killed before; he's seen your eyes. The truth it is, then. You try to keep from shaking. You might even be succeeding.

"Yes."

 _Now_ he is about to encroach on your immediate territory, leaning closer yet, perhaps a foot and a half away. You _have_ to stay calm. You cannot run and you cannot lash out. Not under any circumstances.

"Why?"

"He murdered one of my friends, attacked and gravely wounded both myself and another friend, and intended to move on to the rest of us."

You had meant to keep all emotion out of your voice. You failed.

"What do you feel about that action? Do you believe it to have been absolutely necessary?"

"I feel nothing. I carried out my duty. I do believe that it was necessary."

"Why?"

"To prevent further deaths."

"What gives you the right to take another life?"

... This time you stop for a moment and think. Here is where aliens differ _wildly_ in their beliefs, and you would attempt to think of a calculated answer if you did not believe wholepusheredly that this man _will_ know if you lie to him. The truth once more, then.

"Everything and nothing."

One corner of his mouth tugs upward, then reasserts itself. His posture slowly relaxes as he returns to a more normal sitting position. In a vacuum, you think this would signify that the riskiest part of the conversation has ended, but a truly clever tr – _person_ might take such an action _specifically_ to create that impression.

"Spoken like a true soldier," he says, and before you can stop yourself, you've already replied.

"No. A soldier kills for a cause. I killed for other people."

Neither of you makes a sound for at least four or five seconds, during which you are utterly confident that your life is about to be snuffed out like an archaic wax illumination cylinder. Then he simply... moves on.

"Why do you want to become a Huntress?"

He says it as if it's as simple as any of his other questions, when in fact it is by far the most uncomfortable. Your reasons... Well, Jade was the first to suggest it, and you know _her_ reasons, but... why is it that you _agreed?_ Why _do_ you want to study the art of combat, aside from the obvious fact that _anyone_ should want to improve their ability to kill?

"To ensure that when I fight, I will have the skill to..."

The skill to what, Kanaya Maryam? To annihilate your foes? To 'protect the people'?

"... to save them _all,_ next time."

You don't entirely realize that you've looked down until you finish speaking. Something feels hot and prickly behind your eyes.

"And why is it," he says, "that you would rather study at Beacon Academy than here in Atlas?"

"Beacon is where my friends are," you reply, because it really is your only specific reason for caring at all about _where_ you train, and assume that he can extrapolate from there. If nothing else, he nods in general understanding.

"I have one last question, then."

You swallow. It hurts.

"The test you're about to take will involve combat against androids that are not _designed_ to kill, but injury or death are still possibilities. Do you accept that risk?"

"Of course."

He pushes his chair back with a screech that isn't _quite_ painful but is definitely unpleasant, and stands. You wonder whether or not that sound was even audible to human ears, and find that you have no clear answer.

"In that case, follow me."

 

* * *

 

You're standing, now, in a very large and irritatingly white room strewn with obstacles and odd bits of crudely simulated terrain. Many of them could be used as cover, though, or even platforms for high-speed urban navigational maneuvering...

The general is watching – _personally?_ you suppose he did _interview_ you personally, but still – from the other side of a glass window somewhere above where he can see the entire room at once. That alone makes your flesh crawl, even if you know that he ~~probably~~ has no intention of murdering you at this point. You wonder if this is supposed to be as intimidating as it is.

"Your objective is to survive," he says through a sound transferral and magnification system built into the walls, and yes, this is the kind of thing you expected. "Our androids are programmed to withdraw if your aura falls into the red, which is considered a failure. Double check your aura monitor, or don't, but I'd recommend you do it just in case."

"I don't particularly care," you say. "If training machines are enough to defeat me, then I am probably better off dying here and now than being a liability."

He nods.

"Fair enough. You'll begin in five seconds. Don't disappoint me."

You unlatch the chainsaw from your dress and trigger its blade to extend and linkteeth to whirl. The roar is... comforting. All of this is comforting in contrast to the daymere of that conversation. Fighting monsters or their equivalent is something you _know_ you can do.

Surviving is also something you can do. You've died at least once and yet here you are, still not dead for some reason. It's going to feel _great_ to finally let go and unleash a storm of rage and destruction. You've got a lot to be angry about these days.

Five seconds are now spent. Previously invisible doors across the room from you, fifty or sixty meters distant, and the machines begin to march.

You take your first moment to assess the enemy. There appear to be six targets for now, generally troll-shaped and painted a sleek day gray, four armed with short blades extending from the wrist, two with light automatic firearms. The basic machines should be simple, but with fire support... Well, you can see why there are objects nearby to use as cover.

The melee androids begin to close in with speed that's _surprising_ but not alarming, and the others open fire without hesitation.

This is the first moment, you think, that you truly and fully comprehend how much this world's technology differs from both its Alternian and... ~~Earthian~~ alien counterparts, because as you hurl yourself to the side and shield the bulk of your body behind a large cube of some sort, you attempt to predict the general directions the projectiles should travel, and discover that as you do so and the strange weight of the energy permeating you shifts with the intention, _you can see them mid-flight._

Judging by both audio and visual cues, they are entirely subsonic... you think that if you really tried, you could probably _block_ at least some of the hail of rounds bearing down on you _after_ they leave their respective barrels. Not the ~~real~~ _old_ you, but this you, the one with boosted senses and the surreal enhancements brought on by the presence of aura... _this_ you would not even find it terribly difficult.

Your targets are neither quiet nor subtle, and for the moment, you don't even need a specific strategy. One pair will either split around the cube or leap over it, followed by the others.

They choose to leap, and a swing and half-turn leaves the first two bisected, crashing to the ground in a shower of sparks. Your shoulder aches, sharp and annoyed. Loudly echoing clanks ears reveal that the others plan to circle around, so you vault over the cube and kick off its edge for momentum, rushing the two farthest from you. Their allies are left to chase after you. An exercise in futility.

Most of the shots miss on their own – you _are_ rather fast, if you do say so yourself – and the remainder you can and do deflect with the flat of your weapon. It doesn't even seem to be damaged, strengthened as it is by your aura. Amusing. You're struck for the billionth time by how parts of your recent life have simultaneously felt more real than reality and more like a video game than SGRUB.

Before they can properly react, you decapitate both machines with a single quick swipe each and turn to face the final two, letting one's blades chip and slide against linkteeth and delivering a circular hive kick to the other's middle. You only meant to knock it away, but the force actually shatters its torso, showering the floor behind it in chips of twisted metal.

Battle with a weapon like this is about _fluidity,_ crude as it may seem at first glance; a heavy weapon demands that every blow be _perfect,_ every motion draw from and enhance whatever motion is already in progress. In this case, since your leg is highly unexpectedly _still_ _in motion_ _,_ you let yourself complete a full spin and cleave the last android in twain as though it were made of flesh instead of hardened steel. Your shoulder throbs.

Suddenly you find yourself wanting to laugh. What on Alternia are you _doing?_ You're in an alien military compound, fighting combat androids as a test to enroll in an educational training facility focused on killing monsters. You are dimly aware of hatches opening in walls, more of those androids pouring out, but you're somewhat lost in thought. You'll have to let old fighting instincts handle the simpler work for you.

This is your life now, apparently; violent and absurd in a strangely kind world. _(_ _delegate mental processing roles,_ _identify priority targets,_ _draw your routes through the chaos_ _)_ Honestly, you don't care what you're doing with yourself as long as there's a chance it could help you find Rose, Karkat, Dave, Terezi, anyone. _(_ _y_ _ou_ _'ve_ _always been fast but now, now you can move with grace_ _so thorough that it's almost liberating_ _)_ If it happens to give you enough power to preserve the lives of _all_ the very few people who still matter to you, well, you can't complain about that, now can you? _(_ _losing yourself to_ _t_ _he rhythm of_ _your steps, slashes, the chainsaw's_ _devouring voice_ _carving through their ranks,_ _all of it_ _beautiful_ _)_

You refuse to suffer another Eridan or Gamzee. _(_ _make yourself_ _a savage dance_ _r,_ _trailing sparks and smoke and_ _severed limbs)_ Whoever is still alive at this point has earned it apart from the insufferable clown, but... why do you have the strange feeling that he's _not_ alive? _(_ _you can feel_ _something_ _worthwhile,_ _calming,_ _in the grinding impacts of victory_ _and destruction_ _)_ Did something happen to him during the bright haze that is your final memory from before your arrival in this place? _(_ _imagine_ _painting_ _the floor and walls with_ _strings of_ _sticky blood instead of_ _thin spatters of_ _black_ _hydraulic_ _fluid_ _)_ This is really not the time to worry about the past, though, is it? _(_ _g_ _unfire_ _finally_ _silen_ _t_ _,_ _alone in a sea of white_ _that seethes with a_ _n ongoing_ _crystal-_ _fueled_ _scream and the hiss of_ _ruined_ _electronics)_

While your enemies may lie in pieces around you, there is no chance that this test is over, and it can't _all_ be this easy.

A taller hatch glides open, silhouetting a much larger machine that is presumably intended to be an _actual challenge_ _._ Finally.

... And your mouth goes dry when that shape properly registers in your head. Your grip on your weapon goes shaky and uncertain. This pulls at _old_ memory, the kind that's far beyond logic, harder to parse than the idea of having to speak to a _highblood general_ , than the idea of being _allowed_ to do that. You've seen this shape countless thousands of times.

No troll could ever forget the sight of an Imperial drone.

It's different, right? Isn't it? It _must_ be. They don't _exist_ anymore, and certainly not... _here._

Yes, the colors, those are different. White and silver and blue. Atlas colors. It can't be a drone with those colors, even if it looks nearly identical. You're okay. It's okay. It's just _similar._ Different ports for weaponry, the smell of dust beneath the metal. This must be some horrifying coincidence, a quirk of fate.

After all, if it was a real drone you would already be dead.

One of its arms ends in a long thick blade that crackles with electricity, floods the room with the stench of trioxygen. The other reminds you of the massive scatter rifles you used to see mounted on battle suits or carried by equally massive highbloods in action films and Imperially-authorized subjugation footage. Slim micro-missile pods are clearly hidden beneath the barely-visible seams of hatches in the shoulders. There's probably more weaponry, hidden far more cleverly, though you hope not a twelfth as much as a real drone's.

You are quite sure the general was honest about his machines being designed to halt their attacks at critical aura levels, but that scatter rifle could still leave you a green smear on the floor with a single shot at close enough range, even if its ammunition is subsonic as well.

This two and a half meter engine of destruction, _this_ is the real reason you had to consent to accepting responsibility for any potentially fatal 'accidents.' Now it all falls into place.

And suddenly you have no more time to think, because propulsion mechanisms on its back have launched it right in your direction and it is, without question, faster than you in its ability to cover ground, if nothing else. God, you hope it's slower in battle.

The scatter rifle belches a spread of super-heated shrapnel – a _flak cannon,_ not a scatter rifle, worse than you'd assumed – you hurl yourself to the floor – a few glancing pieces slice and burn at your aura – and it takes the chance to bring its massive blade in an arc that may in fact cause you to entirely re-evaluate your perception of the word 'savage,' which now seems overused in the face of _this._

You can't dodge it, and that leaves only one option.

It takes every bit of strength you can muster to block, arms and knees shaking from the strain, the weapon's electrical charge wracking your aura and numbing your teeth, until a streak of blazing agony tears through your wounded shoulder and you can only slide the thing off at an angle, even though the sheer force of it sends you flying halfway across the room to land in a daze among scattered test obstacles and the rubble of artificial terrain. Move. Get up. _Move!_

You blink tears from your eyes in time to see the missile pods open wide, a standard six each. You're already up when they launch, and you're running for cover when you hear the sound of another volley. For a moment the sheer indignity of that is actually _distracting._

What absolutely ruthless engineers equipped this thing so that each pod fired _double?_ Small payload or not, how is there even space for that extra ammunition?

The first few missiles crash into cubes and low walls, nearly bowling you over, and then your world goes white as the rest begin to impact directly behind you, turning your sprint into senseless momentum and an enormous, painful impact. It appears you have been thrown across _other_ half of the room and into the wall.

Unfortunate.

You're on your knees again in seconds through what feels like sheer willpower – could you attribute even _that_ to aura? Which of your accomplishments truly _belong_ to you? – and the world is so loud it hurts, so quiet it aches.

An excellent example of how your 'enhanced' hearing is double-edged sword.

In a dulled universe ringing out like your senses are a bell struck by a fifty kilogram hammer, you make it to your feet in time to twist barely out of the path of that blade as the machine completes a massive charge, punching it deep into the wall as though it were a lance instead.

You would love to hear the general attempt to describe a way in which that attack could have been anything _but_ fatal.

The message is clear, however: these are the risks you're signing up for. Those too foolish to know what they are too weak to attempt are those who must die before they can become a risk to their own operations in the field. That realization puts a small smile on your face; it's comforting to know that this planet's military understands the way of the world, even if many of its residents do not.

Oh, right. You just nearly died. You may want to do something about that.

... Such as pouring every bit of strength you have left, pain be damned, into severing that blade arm before it can withdraw, focusing all your will on making that metal shred and snap, and just as the wall is losing its grip and your enemy pulls away, the machine limb comes free and slams into the floor. You can't hear the immense crash, but you can feel it all the way to the bone.

When you look back at the thing in triumph, your field of vision is consumed by the flak cannon's enormous barrel two feet in front of your face, angled downward in an awkward but successful attempt to track what must, to its targeting systems, be a rather small target.

You mouth an apology, or maybe just say it out loud; you can't tell the difference.

_I am so sorry, Rose. I tried. I really did._

...

The end never comes.

He's shut the machine down.

Your aura did not waver, but he's shut it down.

 

* * *

 

There's a kindness in the general's eyes that doesn't suit someone of his station, and he waits patiently along with you for your deafness to pass – only a handful of minutes. Without boosted recovery you suspect it would have taken hours. At some point a low-ranked soldier brings you a glass of water that almost helps ease the pounding ache in your head and all four ears.

Almost.

When you can finally hear well enough to converse again, dulled or not, he presses something on his scroll, a recording mechanism if your guess is worth anything, and levels his gaze.

"Congratulations," he says. "You've more than proven yourself."

... This you did not expect.

"I don't understand. I failed to defeat the enemy."

He raises an eyebrow. Human anatomy is so very odd. You're temped to reach up and feel at _yours_ if only because he's reminded you that they exist.

"You destroyed thirty android foot soldiers and held your own against an Atlesian Paragon-22. You've proven yourself more than worthy, and I believe that with enough effort, you have a bright future ahead of you as a Huntress."

Worthy to grasp at the very lowest echelons of power required for this career is what he really means, and now that you've had more time to think about it, it's incredible to think fighting _that thing_ was necessary to _qualify you for proper combat training._

You can't decide whether to laugh or cry.

"I failed to defeat the enemy," you repeat without really meaning to; you're putting yourself at risk, but after what you've just done it's hard to make yourself care. He rises, extends a hand. You force your exhausted body to stand along with him.Ah, yes, you'd almost forgotten this custom.

"I'm sure you have your reasons for ignoring it," he replies, "but you should have that wound treated properly. It's starting to bleed through your clothes." Ah. He's right; deep, alien red is stickying your general shoulder area, and brighter trails have begun to creep down your arm. You don't quite understand what point he's making, if any, but it's more important to complete the ritual and get out of this place before you commit some breach of conduct and find yourself up against a wall in front of an execution squad.

You don't know if there's anything to be said, so you raise your own arm and extend a fist.

General Ironwood blinks. For a few short and frightening moments, you think you've missed or misunderstood something. Then he shakes his head and taps his knuckles against yours.

"Most of the paperwork will be handled internally. You'll have more forms to fill when you arrive in Vale and dual citizenship can be frustrating to iron out, but by tonight the information you've already provided should be processed. It's a shame to lose a promising Huntress, but I understand your reasons. In any case, you'll always be welcome as a citizen of the Kingdom of Atlas."

It's your turn to blink, now, and to keep yourself from snorting out loud at the idea that legal citizenship could make _any_ faunus 'welcome' in Atlas, but you suppose the gesture is... nice, if still extremely misleading.

"It's been a pleasure, Ms. Maryam. Good luck."

"Thank you for your time, General," you say, and you don't start running until you're _sure_ he can't see you anymore.

 

* * *

RWBY / NJKA

+[ **J** ]+

* * *

 

You manage to keep a professional expression on your face until Ms. Maryam is gone. Then you stride angrily to the nearest elevator, enter the code for R&D, and prepare to deal with a certain self-proclaimed genius and his ego. If the man wasn't so damned _useful_ you'd have had him shot or dishonorably discharged years ago.

It's not far to his office. You don't bother to knock, and the fact that his door is unlocked saves you a bit of money that would've gone to repairing the damage if you'd needed to wrench it open and smash the lock in the process.

He twirls his chair around lazily and shoots you a lopsided grin. Of course he knew you were coming; even if he wasn't constantly monitoring a ridiculous number of cameras on this floor, his body would have picked up on the vibrations your movements send through the air, walls, and floor. Smug golden eyes peer at you from above those ridiculous holographic lenses he insists on wearing.

"To what do I owe the pleathure, General?"

You can't _stand_ people who refuse to be intimidated, and this is definitely one of those people.

"Cut the crap. I know you were watching. One of _your_ precious Paragons nearly killed a student during testing using techniques that _you_ should have disabled for that purpose."

He shrugs.

"Well, thorry for wanting data for _your_ machineth when _you_ keep cutting the budget and making uth put off half our tethting down here."

"You put a _student_ – no, someone who _wasn't even officially a student YET –_ up against that thing with _no restrictions on lethal tactics whatsoever_. She could have been _killed._ In fact, I _know_ you were watching, and you could have shut down that Paragon remotely _yourself_ , but you _didn't._  Instead, you dumped the responsibility on _me._ "

"Oh, thee wath fine," he says, rolling his eyes, and you grit your teeth hard enough to make it audible.

"She was, and I don't know why she agrees with your twisted interpretation of 'the strong live and the weak die' when it comes to these things, but that's the _only_ reason you aren't facing a court-martial right now."

"Ha. And you think _my_ philothophieth are arbitary."

You can _feel_ your eye twitch.

"Look, jutht give it up with the big thcary tholdier-man routine. You know you need me."

This is pointless. You have better things to do than argue with arrogant researchers who've never even had to discharge a weapon in the field. Why did you even bother?

You leave him behind and head for your own office; Oz needs to hear his little favor worked out. If you put it off you'll be risking Glynda turning some of her wrath on _you._ Maybe after that you'll take some time to run diagnostics on your own prosthetics and find something you can use to re-test your artificial arm's strength. _Extensively_.

 _'You know you need me.'_ That's what your resident prodigal programmer said, convinced the sheer quality of his work is enough to let him get away with this kind of insubordination.

The hell of it is, he's _right._


	21. Keep Moving Forward (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god only knows when the next chapter of this is gonna happen but hey progress is progress i suppose

_there's a path running under the city_

_where the stones and the hills divide_

_there's a path we can walk through the loss and the pity_

 

[the birthday massacre – leaving tonight](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A12fE6jGRQA)

 

* * *

 **R** WBY

NJKA

* * *

 

**27 Days Prior to Beacon**

**Afternoon**

 

"Wow," Jade says. "For some reason I never realized how _big_ schools are."

You try _really hard_ not to think that's funny, because that would be kind of mean considering she had never been in a normal _city_ until a few days ago, let alone _here._

She has a point, too! This is actually your very first time personally setting foot on campus, and it is _so, so cool._ The whole place is like... magical! The buildings are way bigger than you expected, too, and there are cool complicated archways over a lot of the sidewalks, little grassy courtyards and stuff that are all super well maintained, there are even a few ga... uh, crap, what's that word? Gazo? Gabezo? Whatever! Those little thingies. And towering over everything else is Beacon Tower, shining green at its very top, so high up that it's crazy.

"This is kinda bigger than _I_ expected," you say. "Plus it looks really homey! See, you can tell somebody had to fill in and paint over bullet holes in like every single wall and there are scorch marks in weird places and, and... and it's just _so cool!"_

"Do 'cool' and 'homey' mean the same thing to you?"

You stop for a second to think about that. Like, your actual house _is_ pretty cool and it's full of cool people, or two of them at least, plus _the best corgi in the entire world._ So...

"Yeah, I guess so! How come? Was your house not cool?"

"No, no! It was really nice," she says, and you're not sure if you should have asked that or not because she kinda looks sad and you hate that but also she seems happy to talk about it? People are so complicated. Maybe it all evens out to 'not a mistake,' which is pretty much the best you can hope for when it comes to people, anyway.

"What was it like?" You've been trying _super hard_ these past few days to like, _not_ interrogate her about her mysterious life, but it's _reaaaally_ tempting and it's not like there can be anything too weird to say when it's just her old house, right?

Jade pauses to look at her little sheet of hand-written directions. You're not actually sure why she wanted to do it that way but you couldn't bring yourself to stop her because her handwriting is _adorable_ oh my _god?_

"Well, it was really big! Bec and I had a ton of space, even if I don't count the rest of the island. Everything was a little bit fancy. My grandpa had it filled up with tons of hunting trophies and stuff... I had a big garden where I grew a lot of vegetables, even though all of my pumpkins kept disappearing somehow..." She furrows her brow and her ears twitch. "I _still_ don't actually know what was going on with that whole mess. It wasn't Bec either, he only ate irradiated meat."

"Wait, _irradiated_ –"

"Grandpa had a whole personal library, too! Although some of his books were, um." She clears her throat. "Maybe not the kind of thing little girls should have been finding. Not that that was _his_ fault! He couldn't exactly could tell me what not to read when he was stuck taxidermied by the fireplace, you know?"

 _"Wait,_ he was _wha –_ "

"Oh, hey! Are those students?"

You blink. That... you must have just heard her wrong or... well anyway! You turn to look where she's pointing. There are a couple of teenagers hanging out at a table under one of the gobozes. Huh... shouldn't it be, like, mostly empty right now?

"They have weapons – I mean I think that box thing must be a weapon, right – and the other guy has wrist blades, and they're not dressed like boring civilians, so... probably? Why are there still students here when last semester's been over so long that the new one's almost a month away? Shouldn't they have just gone home?"

Jade slows down while you pass by, watching. The girl is talking about something that you can't quite hear, and she doesn't _look_ at you but she has big bunny ears so you're pretty sure she knows you're here. It's weird, noticing things like that! Jade being around is making you notice all kinds of stuff. Speaking of, you look back to Jade and her expression is... complicated?

"... Maybe this _is_ home for them," she says, and what does _that_ mean? Yeah, it probably _feels_ kinda like home here, you bet you'll start feeling the same way eventually too, but – oh.

_Oh._

That's really sad. That sucks a _lot._ But it makes sense... a lot of Huntsmen and Huntresses are probably doing this because they've lost something. You can relate to _that,_ but it never really occurred to you that some people would be doing it because they lost _everything._

You feel kind of like a dumb jerk. _Jade_ doesn't even have a home anymore, so you really should have thought more about... well...

"That's really cool! I didn't expect them to do stuff like that."

Huh? She sounds _happy._ Sure it's _cool_ but there's nothing happy about people not having anywhere else left to live, is there? Or are you misunderstanding her somehow? _... Oh,_ wait, no, you get it! If Beacon lets homeless students stay here even when school is out then _she_ has a safe place to live after this, too. Okay, that's a lot less depressing! You'll just... focus on thinking about it that way. Maybe it _is_ pretty sad, but it's also kinda awesome that the school actually helps.

Well, you could both be totally wrong, but something about the way the gondola kids look so completely at peace here makes you doubt it.

The two of you kind of just walk for a few minutes, taking in the sights. There are a few more students scattered around and all of them just seem to be hanging out; like, nobody's in uniform or anything. So that's more evidence for the school housing thing! Maybe!

"Ooh, that sword obviously turns into something but I can't tell what? That looks like a _lot_ of moving parts so I bet it's awesome and – oh my gosh do you see _that?!_ That hammer! It's got a weird blade on it is that a glaive? Is that a hammer that's also a glaive because that is _so_ cool?"

"... Actually, now that you're already talking about weapons... I'm kind of nervous about mine?Right now this is still just a battle rifle. It's not even the one I'm forging back at Mr. Gun, and that one's still just going to be a gun that turns into a different gun. I don't have anything to do at close range except whack things with it like it's a weird club."

Hmm. _Hmmmm._ Only having mid range and long range options _does_ sound pretty dangerous.

"I guess you could stick something sharp on it for now? Like a bayonet, maybe! And then you can figure out more stuff later if you want, so it won't _just_ be a gun-gun?"

Her ears perk up.

"Yeah... a bayonet makes sense. I don't think that I'm ever going to be able to fight much up close, but that's better than nothing. Thank you!" Her smile is so bright and honest. It's a really nice change of pace, seeing her less depressed! You're not sure if she meant for anybody to _notice_ she'd stayed depressed but she isn't super good at faking things and even if she was... ears just don't lie.

"Oh no it's nothing! I'm just, you know, trying to help! And be helpful about stuff!" Augh, that was totally redundant and unnecessary! Why are _you_ suddenly feeling nervous? It's not any of the usual reasons, or at least you don't think it is...

Maybe you jinxed things thinking about feelings, because Jade's good mood starts fading as soon as you enter one of the main school buildings and that's kind of not great but now it's easier to blame your ownactual nervousness on the smaller amount of nervousness from _being inside of Beacon holy crap_ and not stop and spend any time at all thinking about any other possible reasons. _Perfect._

... This is really sucky, though. She doesn't seem to have much more to say and you can _see_ her ears slowly pulling farther back, practically a little more with every step. Well, her face also looks nervous, but sometimes faces are hard and you totally misunderstand them so it's kind of nice to have something else to interpret for once, even if you're not interpreting a happy thing. As much as she's mysterious, you kinda still have an easier time telling how Jade is _feeling_ than you do with pretty much anyone but Yang and Dad. You bet that if you were a Faunus, you'd be a dog, too! But what _kind_ of dog? Zwei already has dibs on being a corgi... Wait, what kind of dog is _Jade?_ Is that even a thing, or are Faunus just whatever?

The two of you go on winding through the halls. You're sort of just absorbing the atmosphere and she's starting to triple-check her directions over and over even when she obviously remembers them. Is she going to be alright?

"Um, hey, are you... feeling okay?"

She startles like she forgot you were there.

"Y-yeah! I'm fine, I'm just... a little bit stressed out, I guess."

... Okay, well, it makes _sense_ to be stressed right now but this is... really quickly getting to the point where 'stressed' doesn't cover it at all.

You're still trying to think of something useful to say or do when you come to a sudden stop outside the testy place, which is apparently also a sparring room. There are some benches in the halls outside most of the classrooms, so you guess you'll just wait for her there? It can't take _too_ long to test someone for this, can it?

"... they're not here yet," she mumbles, and oh jeez she looks even _worse_ now. Now that you think about it, that's _right,_ she was meeting friends here or something! She's been talking to them on her scroll _a lot_ which is a little weird but then again didn't she think they were dead or something? You think she thought they were dead or something. You know she _definitely_ hasn't seen any of them in a while. Maybe it's not actually _that_ weird after all.

It's not like you aren't paying attention! You swear you are!You just keep having trouble processing the fact that she had really good reason to be afraid that everyone she's ever known was dead. That kind of thing is, um... kind of a new concept to you! There has to be a thing to say that'll help out, right? You're her _friend,_ you _have_ to help.

"Don't worry, I'm sure they'll get here soon!"

... Is that really the best you have? What kind of friend are you? It's just, you're not used to being reassuring to anybody but Yang, who will never admit to anybody else on Remnant that you take care of her almost as much as she takes care of you. But that's the problem rightthere, isn't it?You're used to already having memorized the right way to respond to basically everything and you don't have a lifetime's worth of practice figuring out how to help _Jade._ Heck, you've only had a couple of _days._

She giggles in a stomach-sinkingly shaky way and it is _super_ definitely not real laughter. One of her arms is kind of wrapped around herself, hand squeezing her other arm, and she's digging her nails into her skin pretty hard. And now harder. And now _really_ hard.

You've seen _that_ behavior before. Well... not for years, and 'seen' is the wrong way to put it – although you guess technically you've seen it with your eyes even if that's not really the main sense that was involved – but that's not the point, the point is that if you put all the signs together they are screaming _'this girl is about to flip out'_ and there are like a _billion_ reasons you can't let that happen.

"I'm supposed to go in there in two minutes," she says, free hand fiddling with her scroll. "I just sort of hoped they'd b-be here already? So I didn't have to... s-so..."

Okay. _Okay._ You are bad at this but there's one thing that makes _everybody_ feel better probably maybe you hope, and there isn't actually time for anything else, so you make sure she's looking at you and won't be surprised, and then you give her a hug.

It's kind of weird to hug people who aren't in your family. Hugs are a really easy way to make bad things be at least a tiny bit less bad but you're not all that sure what's inappropriate for friends or what, and it's also just weird to be hugging a body that's not shaped like Yang or Dad or Uncle Qrow. Has anybody written a book about how to hug people right? Somebody should do that. You would buy it _instantly_.

She goes stiff for a second, but then she hugs you back and you can feel some of the tension bleed away. Good! You did the thing and it helped! Plus she smells like a gun store and that's kind of a nice bonus. Everybody wins!

... How long do you hug someone who's not family before it's weird? She's awfully clingy, though, so you guess it doesn't matter what's normal or not. It suddenly occurs to you that _she_ might not actually know what's normal either and that's pretty sad because normally normal people know what's normal so she's probably even less normal than you've been thinking and in your experience things are a lot easier for normal people, or at least normal people always _seem_ like things are easy for them? You kinda wouldn't know.

Eventually she lets go and you kinda give her some space. She takes a slow, deep breath, and yeah okay she does let it back out all shaky-weird, but it's still better than if you hadn't done _anything_. It _has to be_ better.

"Thank you," she says in a tiny little voice that you've heard her use before. You want to be happy about this! You didn't screw up! But... even after knowing Jade for just a few days, you can tell she's not actually a shy person at heart, not at all. People like her should be smiling all the time andit kind of hurts to know she _isn't._ You wonder if maybe she used to, before... _whatever_ it was that happened.

"Okay, well... wish me luck!"

"Good luck! You don't need it, though, you'll be fine!"

"Right," she says, and does the deep-breathey thing again. "Yeah. You're right. It'll be fine." Jade smiles at you, and that _would_ seem like a good sign except her ears are saying that happy is pretty much the _last_ thing she actually is.

Then she opens the door and steps through and she's gone.

You sit down on the nearest bench and try not to worry too much. You're not a worrier normally, at least not like Dad is, and really you'd say you hate worrying about _anything_ but there's not much to do about it, is there? It'll be okay, though. You weren't lying, it really will be! You've seen Jade at target practice now and she's _seriously_ good, like, if she had gone to combat school her GPA would be at _least_ a 3.5, so she's definitely for real going to be fine! Professor Ozpin seems really nice too so you don't think she'll have to feel nervous around _him._

"Excuse me! Hi! Hello!"

Whoa! Okay, you are suddenly not alone in here. Two girls in clothes that are sort of _'casual huntress'_ levels of cool are headed your way. It looks like they're both Faunus; the girl who was talking to you has big curly horns and the other one has a long swishy kitty tail. Maybe these are the friends Jade was talking about! ... Or maybe you're just racist. You hope you're not! You're pretty sure you're trying not to be but how would you actually know if you're screwing it up _ooh_ that's a _revolver_ the horned girl's got holstered there, isn't it? She also has what's maybe a thin sword in a sheath but honestly you're more interested in the gun. Unless they _combine._ That's _always_ awesome.

Her outfit makes her look like something you can only describe as a 'party archaeologist'in mostly black and bright friendly red, with a darker red gear symbol on her chest and at least one more belt than she actually needs, maybe even two. Her smile is super big and that would probably make you less nervousif it seemed like a good thing but you're kinda not sure if it _is_ a good thing? It's a little _too_ big and wide, like she could open it way too far and bite off somebody's hand.

The other girl is... sorta grumpy looking by comparison, but not _too_ much. She also looks a lot, well, _shabbier,_ you guess? You don't mean that in a bad way! She just doesn't have the same level of coordination going on. Her whole setup seems like kind of a rush job and you're pretty instantly sure that it's because she hasn't been able to afford anything better; she's obviously _trying_ to pull something together, plus you can see some kind of bracers under her beat up green jacket sleeves but the metal is obviously cheap and the rest of her deal is just really old looking jeans and a plain black t-shirt with a squiggly thing on the chest that must be her symbol.

Huh, both of them have their symbols in basically the same spot. Weird.

They're also both about five feet away from you now, because you spent too much time staring. Come on, Ruby! You know better than that! You've gotta stay in the moment and not get _too_ distracted or else people are going to think you're annoying. Well, you probably _are_ annoying, but they don't need to know that yet.

"Hi!", the girl in red says again. "We're looking for a friend of ours? Her name is Jade Harley and she has big white dog ears."

"Oh! Yeah, she just went in there to take her exam."

"I _said_ mew shouldn't have wasted so much time trying to find out if that buoy understood what 'mortaility' meant," cat-girl mutters. She said that weird, somehow, but it's hard to put your finger on exactly _what_ was weird about it. Both of them have accents that are completely foreign, too. You don't think you've ever heard _anyone_ who sounds very much like this, not even on TV.

"He'll be fine," the other girl says, rolling her eyes. "I'm not _that_ scary. You'd think he'd never even died before! Anyway, you must be Ruby, right? My name is Aradia! I like your aesthetic!"

"My what?" You're sure you should know what that word means, Yang's said it at least once or twice, but that's you for you.

"Your clothes!" She is _right_ up in your face oh jeez. You kind of flatten yourself against the back of the bench. Is this what it's like for other people to put up with _you?_

"Oh! Um, thank you! I like yours, too. Red is... it's _super great."_

Wow. _Wow._ You figure _someone_ in history must have been more awkward than you are, but you sure don't know who it was. Sometimes you think awkwardness should have been your Semblance instead of speed. Then again, you make things weird _super fast_ and that _does_ fit the theme.

"Also yes I'm Ruby and it's nice to meet you?"

... 'Cringeworthy' should be your middle name at this point. There goes your chance to make a decent first impression. Dang it. Aradia pulls back, which is kinda nice because she was about two inches away from poking you with her nose. Or, um. Biting off your face. She sounds nice, though! You think! But also there were _two_ girls here and you should probably not ignore the other one!

"What's, uh, what's your name?"

"This is Nepeta!", Aradia says before her friend can actually answer for herself. Nepeta – how do you pronounce that? the accent is really throwing you off – shoots her a sour look. Jade actually told you their names already, but you're kinda not good at remembering stuff. She told you a few things, actually! Mostly that her friends are 'crazy, but not in a bad way,' and to never touch either of them ever. That last one left you a little bit nervous.

You also asked if they were as weird as her and then felt like a huge butt for it, but she actually didn't seem to mind at all so maybe she's used to being weird and it doesn't bother her anymore and huh maybe she could teach you how to not feel dumb about being weird? Anyway, her answer was just a slightly intense expression and a firm _'yes._ _'_

"Nice to meet you," Nepeta says, still looking pretty annoyed, but she sounds like she means it anyway. She sits down cross-legged against the wall more or less across from you, which is weird since there's totally room on the bench.

Aradia actually _takes_ the space, maybe a little more space than you're happy about. She has a lot of energy which is _incredibly relatable_ but you still can't shake the feeling that she might be dangerous, which bugs you because what's that all about? That's so not like you.

It's just... that _grin._ It makes her look halfway normal and halfway like a horror movie bad guy? You have no idea what to think about that. Actually, maybe it reminds you a little too much of how Yang looks when she's doing something illegal.

"Oh yeah," she says, "has your sister decided if I'm real or not?"

 _That_ was weird timing.

... Wait, why does she know who your sister is?!

"I... huh? What does that mean? You know Yang?"

Aradia kicks her legs back and forth, scuffing her shoes on the floor. Out of the corner of your eye you can see she's turned her head all the way to stare at you, and you almost think she's grinning _even wider than she already was._

"Oh, kind of! I've just been haunting her in her sleep lately, and it's _really funny_ , so I was curious!"

... Okay. That's... that sure is a thing.

You _for sure_ don't regret meeting Jade and stuff, and you'll probaby get used to her instantly terrifying adorable friends eventually, or at least you _hope_ you will, but you still can't help but wonder just what the heck you've gotten yourself into.

"Is... is that your Semblance?" That's a _crazy weird_ Semblance if it is one, but you can't imagine any other reason for it if she's being serious. Maybe she's just playing a stupid trick on you and she knows about Yang from talking to Jade. Ugh! That would be exactly the kind of thing Yang would do _herself_. This is the weirdest twisty train of thought you've had in a while.

Aradia replies with a wink and a mysterious smile.

"It's tidally her Semblance," Nepeta says brightly.

"Aww, you ruined it," Aradia pouts. "I could have made it so much weirder!" Then she smiles again. "You took the bait, though. I almost thought you'd screw that up."

Nepeta groans and flops her head into her hands. You're suddenly feeling even less sure about what's going on here than you were before.

 _"Purrlease_ stop hitting on me right now? You're seariously stressing me out, and not in a good way."

Aradia shrugs and sighs, although she doesn't exactly sound like she feels bad about... whatever is happening? It's basically just getting weirder and yeah Jade said her friends were super weird but somehow you still weren't expecting _this?_ What even... you're not even good at _normal_ people stuff, how are you supposed to make sense of these two?

"Sorry," Aradia says, and she does actually sound a little sorry! "I'm just bored. Hey, cheer up! We get to do some _hunting!"_ Nepeta perks up instantly, not really like somebody just flipped a switch in her brain but also a little bit like that. Whoa, what if brains had actual switches for different feelings? Like if you were mad you could just turn that off and not mess things up, or if you were really, really, really, _really_ sad and nobody else understood at all you could just –

 _"Yes!"_ Whoa! Okay maybe the switch thing _was_ a good metaphor? "It's probubbly robots or something but _still!_ It's been furever since I got to just claw something to death, you know?"

Um. Okay. That's not concerning at all.

Aradia... actually seems put off too? For a second there you were expecting her to say something just as creepy or even creepier, but –

"Hey, I was thinking... what's up with the puns?"

Or maybe it was something completely silly that you had only halfway noticed and she doesn't mind the weird part at all. At least they've sorta forgotten you're here! This way you don't have to keep saying dumb things and embarrassing yourself over and over.

"I alwaves do puns," Nepeta says.

"Yeah, sure, but not like this! You've got one in almost every sentence lately, sometimes two! It's cute but it's also sorta weird for you, you know?"

"I _don't_ want to talk about this," Nepeta says, pun-free. "And de-fin-ately not here!" Okay, there was a pun for sure, you think! "I mean, I'm just... moby it's because I'm a little nervous. I catn't help it. It's not a big deal."

Even you can tell she said that _exactly_ the way somebody does when it's totally a big deal and they're trying to change the subject. That's so _weird,_ though. She just talks in puns _all the time_ , you guess? Yang is going to _love_ her. Wait, that's terrible, your whole life is _already_ full of bad puns and jokes and now your (only) friend's friend is _this girl?_ Why is your life like this? _What did you do to deserve this?_

"The important part is we get to destroy a lot of stuff," Aradia says. "Just think about that! And then we start learning how to be _even better_ at destroying things! And we'll probably find weird old ruins and mysterious caves full of monsters!"

"... Yeah," Nepeta says, looking a little happier again. You think. You wish you knew anything about cat tails, but you guess Jade is the only one you'll get to cheat with. Oh well! Maybe you'll do some research later, it might be useful! "Yeah! It'll be _fun._ I'm reely ready to take a break from the universe and just... get to hunt monsters and paint stuff and see new things and _be alive again_. _"_

... You really hope you get to find out what their deal is someday? It sounds pretty depressing so maybe you _don't_ actually want to know... no, you need to try to know more stuff when you get the chance to. It's hard to be a good friend when you barely know anything about a person and suddenly you know someone neat who _wants_ to be your friend and you are _not_ messing that up by slacking off instead of learning about _her_ friends, _no way._

As long as no one tries to drag you into their super weird conversation, you think you'll be –

"Anyway _you're_ new," Aradia says, leaning over way too close again, "so let's see if we can't _learn_ a thing or two!"

– you'll be just... fine. Welp. Now things are about to be _so much more awkward_.

"Jade said something about you having a _scythe?_ I am _very_ interested in _that."_

... Or maybe things are about to be _amazing._

You think the grin spreading on your face is probably almost as big as hers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stay tuned to find out how many different, escalatingly ridiculous and complicated ways i can make ruby misremember the word "gazebo"


	22. Keep Moving Forward (3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WELL, THIS FIC SURE DOES HAVE ITS FIRST PIECE OF OFFICIALLY-APPROVED ART. This is drawn by a real good friend of mine and if you are enjoying this fic even a little bit, _please, PLEASE_ go check out his stuff.**
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> You can consider this to be pretty much Faunus!Aradia's canon appearance.

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ART SPOTLIGHT

<https://personathief.deviantart.com/art/Aradia-The-Lionhearted-702621966>

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_look around and begin to realize_

_that you're no longer alone tonight_

_you're coming into your own tonight_

_one of the brave and the bold tonight_

 

[disturbed – the brave and the bold](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FP4OR8Ycipg)

 

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RWBY

N  **J** KA

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**27 Days Prior to Beacon**

**Afternoon**

 

You're sitting at a weirdly cozy table at monster hunter school, watching this sort of agelessly thirty to sixty year old man pour tea for the both of you. You came in here basically terrified, but it's hard to stay that way when somebody's being so welcoming and just generally _nice._ Why were you expecting someone harsh and scary? Maybe... maybe you should just try to let go of this suffocating anxiety that's been stuck to you for the last few days. It's probably not that easy – you can't just decide to stop feeling something like you're flipping a switch – but this isn't so bad, is it?

Since you came here you've been scared of _everything,_ and it's wearing you down pretty seriously, but do you actually need to be scared? Yeah, it's a massive shift in your environment and you barely know where anybody is, but most of the people here have been really nice to you. Okay, all the racists haven't been much fun, but you aren't actually scared of _them_ , they're just... unpleasant?

The point is that it's not like you to be this freaked out by almost anything, and you're wondering if you can fix that, somehow.

"Miss... Harley, was it?"

You almost jump in your seat. Talk about distracting yourself.

"Um, yeah. Jade Harley! But, you can just call me Jade?"

The headmaster guy smiles. It's an easy, honest kind of smile, exactly what you weren't expecting from someone who teaches kids how to fight living nightmares.

"Jade, then. I'm going to start off by asking a few questions – nothing too invasive, hopefully – and then we'll move on to testing your physical capabilities. There will be a degree of risk to your health involved in that process, so before we conduct this interview, I would like to confirm whether you consent to that risk."

You just nod. It's not like you expected getting tested for monster hunter school to be _saf_ _e,_ and anyway, if there's one thing you're _not_ worried about, it's being able to shoot a gun. Especially with how weirdly enhanced your senses and body seem to be after Ruby unlocked your soul or whatever with her creepy poetry. (You're still wondering what _that_ was about, but it's not a big concern.)

"Excellent." He carefully swirls the tea in his mug, takes a sip.

There really is something calming about him; it's not that he reminds you of Grandpa, exactly, but he does give off a familiar sense of... maybe the word you're looking for is _security?_ That's not completely right, but it's close. He feels like someone who believes he's completely in control of a situation and doesn't seem to have anything but good intentions, and that's something you're pretty sure you haven't seen in a long, _long_ time.

"I've heard from Miss Megido that you do not currently exist in any legal system. There is nothing _wrong_ with that, but it would be ideal to establish the reason why."

"Um," you mumble, "I grew up somewhere else?"

He nods, writes something on a little notepad on his desk.

"While it's far from unheard of to have been missed by census-takers, I would like to know whether this was intentional or accidental."

"I guess, neither? Sort of? I'm from kind of a long way away."

"Fair enough. I don't want to risk insensitivity with my next question, but do you have any surviving family? Close or distant."

You swallow a lump of worry. You think you do, and it's pretty upsetting that you only _think_ so.

"I have a brother," you mumble. "I'm not sure where he is, though. He's probably my age."

The headmaster nods again, although he does quirk an eyebrow at your phrasing. Dang it. That was a slip up, you have to think more carefully before you say things that wouldn't make sense to somebody else, especially here and now.

"Can you describe any prior combat experience? Not training, but actual danger?"

"Uh, well, I've fought some monsters? I'm not really sure how many. Not as many as my friends or my brother, but a few..."

"What is your preferred weapon?"

"Oh!" Yes. This you can be direct about. No need to worry about vagueness, or acceptable alternatives to the truth, or anything scary like that. "I use a custom-forged battle rifle – um, 5.56x4mm rounds, with single, 3-shot burst, and full-auto firing modes? It's not completely finished, but it should eventually be able to unfold another step and use an alternate barrel to function as an anti-materiel rifle – I'm working on my own dust mixtures to try to get kind of an armor-piercing/high explosive effect? I've been experimenting with 12.7x99mm cartridges, and I think –"

"That is more than enough information, Jade. Your enthusiasm _is_ appreciated, however."

"Right, right," you say, ears drooping a little. You're too used to talking to Ruby about this stuff.

"Do you have any experience with combat against other faunus or humans, and – forgive me for asking, but – have you ever taken the life of another person?"

His eyes don't go cold, or dark, and calling his gaze 'sharp' seems unfair, but there's definitely a focus to the whole thing that wasn't there before. You're not exactly surprised.

You really, really, really, _really_ don't want to answer this question.

"No, I don't. I – no. I don't have any... um..."

He waits for you to finish. You wish he would just cut you off or something, spare you having to think about this at all, but he doesn't.

"Y-yes, I have, um, killed another p-person."

Even if you weren't aiming the gun at him, even if it was probably more Jack's fault than yours, you are definitely still a murderer.

"By – by a-accident."

It takes everything you have to keep from breaking down. You still end up sniffling, swallowing back tears. This would be a terrible time to just start sobbing. Things ended up okay, sort of, because dream selves are _(were)_ real useful, but... you killed him, even if he got better.

Will this guy actually _believe_ it was an accident? If he does, will that matter? _Should_ that matter?

"Please, have some tea. Take as long as you'd like, and then we can move on."

... The sheer amount of sympathy in his voice almost destroys what little composure you have.

You take a sip of tea. It's hot, almost enough to hurt but not quite, not scalding. There's something weirdly comforting about that.

After a minute or so, you wipe your eyes and try to continue.

"What is your reason for wishing to become a Huntress?"

Oh jeez. That's... boy, that sure is simple and complicated at the same time, isn't it? How do you answer that? You can't give the _whole_ truth, but you can give _some_ of it, right?

"Well, it's... there are a few reasons, I guess. I do want to protect people, and all of that. I think it's a really noble job! But, I want to be kind of honest, so... Some of it is about power? Jeez, that sounds bad when I say it like that, it's just that I want... I want to be able to stop bad stuff when it happens. When somebody I care about is in danger, or just random people, I want to know I can _fix_ it, not just... stand there on the sidelines. I don't want to be cornered by, well, being _weak._ That, and... maybe if I do this, I'll end up traveling enough to find... um. To find some people, and to find some answers that I don't think I _can_ find without being a little bit powerful."

By the end, you've hung your head a little and you feel really, _really_ petty. This is like joining the police just because you want to get to carry a gun. Even if you mean well, is it really okay to sign up for this when you're just doing it to serve your own selfishness?

The headmaster just nods, though, makes a few more notes.

"Thank you for your honesty, Jade. I find it preferable to have complex desires you feel no need to hide, than to simply regurgitate the typical statement about wanting to give your life to the people. I dearly hope that you are prepared to do so regardless, but it would be rather cruel of me to begrudge a young woman her own aspirations."

... Where did this guy _come_ from? Is he actually real?

"My last question is a simple one: why choose Beacon Academy over another school?"

"Oh, well, pretty much because it's in Vale and I'm in Vale? No offense! It's not that your school doesn't seem, um, really nice! It does! It's like, this is where my friends are, and I don't know anything about the other schools anyway, so..."

He just smiles.

"No offense taken. Now, I have one final question, and then we can move on to testing your physical aptitude. Please do your best to answer as truthfully as you can, according to your own personal interpretation."

"... Okay?"

The headmaster steeples his fingers and leans forward, kind of like that one anime guy but less creepy.

_"Who are you?"_

You're...

... not sure how to answer that.

What does that _mean?_ Who are you? Your own interpretation? Does he _know_ something? Not that it would matter if he did, you guess, but... still. Your mind is racing, trying to come up with something on the spot – is there a wrong answer to this? He didn't say there was no wrong answer, but he didn't _actually_ say that, either.

You struggle to keep your ears from doing anything dumb and ruining your hopefully-sort-of-decent poker face. It's kinda hard and you don't think it's working. Maybe he doesn't know how dog body language works, but he gives off this eerie feeling that he knows _everything_ , somehow, so you wouldn't be surprised.

"I... I'm somebody... who used to be important. Now I'm sort of... nobody." You take a deep breath through your nose, and try to make yourself believe what you say next. "But soon, I'm going to be somebody again, and this time it'll be because I _earned_ it."

"... Interesting," he says, and he doesn't write anything down. Instead he sits up, slides his chair back, and stands again. Jeez, he's tall. Like, holy crap he's tall. You knew that already but _wow._ You know you're kind of small yourself, but you think most people are kind of small next to him.

"Well then, Jade," he says, "I'd like to see what you're capable of."

 

* * *

 

The headmaster leads you through a few hallways to a real big, mostly-empty room with some weird machines on the walls and ceiling. They look kind of like... projectors, maybe? It's hard to be sure. Technology here is super cool and you need to learn more about it because wow you have _no idea_ what half of the things you see are even for.

"We will be using this facility to simulate a few basic combat situations. Your only instructions are to take this scenario as seriously as possible, and to act carefully; your opponents may not be entirely real, but they are still quite capable of inflicting harm. I will, of course, deactivate the simulation if things get out of hand, but that is no guarantee of safety."

"Um, sure! That's fine. I wouldn't have come to monster hunter school if I wasn't ready to get hurt."

"Excellent," he smiles, and then he's gone, shutting the door behind him. You're not exactly sure what he meant by "not entirely real" or what you should be doing at this point. You guess you're waiting for something? It'd probably be smart to get your weapon ready, so you grab it and snap it free from the magnetic strips on your back _(so cool!)_ , pull the switch to start it unfolding from a smaller chunky metal thing into a proper battle rifle.

This weird ultra-light metal transforming weapon stuff seemed kind of impossible to you at first, but it turns out that there's actually an explanation that _sort of_ makes sense; there's a very specific, real expensive mixture of dust that can actually be forged _into_ one of a couple very specific and expensive types of metal that has a weird kind of minor spatial-compression effect. It's not the kind of thing that could take the place of a strife specibus but it helps a whole lot, and there are a couple ways to use the dust for other things too, which you've mostly done so your clips can hold way more ammo than they ought to.

You are ridiculously grateful to Reg for helping you out with all of this. You guess that's an advantage to already knowing people before you show up on another planet! Well, you only half-know him, but he's caught in this weird mental space where he's both scared and super respectful of you because of Bec, and apparently his solution is to try to be your friend. It's a solution you really like!

Suddenly, the room comes to life.

Those projector-looking things on the walls and ceiling start to slide along hidden rails _real_ quick, buzzing and clicking along into different configurations, stop all at once, and then...

Well, you were basically right about what they were, you just weren't expecting _hardlight_ projectors. This is maybe the coolest thing you've ever seen, ever? Holy crap. How _expensive_ is this room? How rich is this _school?_ You're starting to think you got crazy lucky even having the _chance_ to enroll here.

The hardlight takes shape as big blue-ish wolf monsters. Yeah, you recognize these from things Ruby's shown you. So these are Grimm. Wow, are the real ones this huge? They probably are. You do know these monsters can get crazy sometimes, but is this just... is this the _normal_ kind?

Jeez, no wonder it basically takes superheroes to deal with them.

There's kind of three loud beep from... well, _somewhere,_ like the start of a racing game.

BOOP.

BOOP.

_BEEEEP!_

And now the hardlight monsters are rushing you. There are four of them and they're pretty scary!

Unfortunately for them, you played SBURB.

You click your rifle into burst fire mode and just kinda... mow them down one by one before they can get to you! It's weird shooting sub-sonic ammo, especially when your brain seems to be interacting with your aura to... not exactly slow down your perception of time, it's hard to put it into words even for yourself, but _something_ like that?

Man, these things are kinda easier to take out than you expected, or maybe your gun is just better than you thought it was! The bullets knock big holes in their blue wireframe-y bodies and they crash to the ground and then fade out of existence with simulated howls.

There's no way that was the whole thing, so you keep the gun ready and stay on alert.

This time, the beeps come _before_ the projections start.

BOOP. BOOP. _BEEEEP!_

Oh okay wow, yeah, that's twelve of them scattered around you in a circle – you wouldn't even know about the ones behind you, except you can hear the projectors humming louder. You wonder how big the difference actually is; would you have noticed that without having four ears? Being you really makes life easier. Well, physically at least... socially, it's kind of the worst.

You shake your head a little. Stay on track, Jade! Stuff is happening!

The other thing that's different this time is that just as all the wolf monsters rush you again, hardlight obstacles show up, too. There are mostly tree stumps and a few broken, fallen trees; some of them are _real_ big, so you have to wonder if that's normal. Maybe forests in this world are just huge. They probably are, and that's kinda neat!

You unload a few bursts and clean out three of the wolves in front of you, then dash through the gap you've created, hopping over a log and turning to get the ones to the side, which are scrambling to face you again. Before they can reach you, though, their friends from the other side of the room vault over them, snarling and leaping your way pretty dang fast. You have enough time to blast the face off one of them, and then there are two about to pounce right on you.

Four down, eight to go, and the tiny bit of distance you got is already gone.

The best choice is hurling yourself sideways to get away from those huge claws. The floor is hard and cold and you bite your lip when you crash into it with your shoulder, but the aura factor dulls it enough for you to get off another two bursts while you slide across the floor. One of those catches a wolf right in the side and takes it down brutally, and the other misses with two bullets but puts the third one right through the target's skull.

Six down, and now you're on the floor while the other six get ready to rip you to shreds.

You switch over to full-auto and steal an idea from Ruby. It won't work exactly the same, but maybe it'll help; while you're trying to hop back up to your feet, you just cut loose and spray bullets down at an angle, using the recoil to help push your body. Between you being kinda tiny, the recoil from dust explosions being kinda huge, and your aura kinda doing the weird thing it does where it seems to respond to your thoughts and passively make whatever you're doing work better, it's enough to put yourself a few more feet away and get you standing again.

Several sets of claws rip chunks of concrete out of the floor right where you were a second ago. Whoo, boy, that's pretty scary! You wouldn't have died, you don't think, but if that had hit you it would've _really_ sucked, and if you _didn't_ have aura you would've been a freshly carved up piece of Harley steak.

Full-auto seems like it's still the right approach here. You smash the trigger again and don't let up, just kind of going spray-and-pray on the whole group, and by the time your clip runs out, that's four more dead. Are you like, _good_ at this? Sure you went into this assuming you could get by, but this is actually going _really well_ so far _._

You don't have time to reload before the last two get to you, so you eject the clip and smash your rifle right into one of their dumb awesome hologram snouts, and it actually _shatters and disappears._ You can tell these things are tough enough that they must be at least half or two thirds as durable as real flesh and bone, so wow, you can do _that?_ You're like... _way_ stronger than you thought you were.

It's starting to seem like aura is most of the reason humanity managed to survive this long. And faunus! Dang, you should really try to remember that you're, well... not human, basically. It's not gonna change any time soon, probably, and forgetting you're not human anymore will be even more awkward and depressing than accepting it.

The other wolf slashes the heck out of you while you're distracted thinking about your species problems, and _ow,_ your guts would be on the floor if you were still in your own continuum. Here, though, it just hurts pretty bad, knocks the wind out of you, and throws you back five or six feet.

You're not stunned so hard that you can't think, though. You grit your teeth, grab another clip, slot it right in, and shred the last wolf into sparkly blue pretend-glass just as it's lunging at you again.

Now you're breathing heavy, eyes wide, ears ringing a little from all the gunshots – ow, that's going to take some getting used to, isn't it – wondering if there's a third round.

There is.

_BOOP. BOOP. BEEEEP!_

There are only five this time, but one of them is _enormous._ It has to be at least ten feet tall when it rears up, and the invisible speakers howl so loud it stings a little. This one has a bunch more hardlight bone-armor plates on it, and it just kind of generally looks like... well... like a boss fight?

The fallen logs and stumps and stuff multiply, making the ground a lot more treacherous to navigate. You're going to have to be extra careful not to get all tripped up.

It's not hard to down two of the little ones – man, what a world, that you're calling six foot tall werewolves 'little ones' – in burst mode again, but then the others are almost on top of you and oh crap this could be bad, you get the feeling the big guy isn't going to crackle out of existence with just a couple of shots.

You try to step back and instantly bump into another of those stupid tree stumps like a doofus, so now you have two choices: try to go sideways, or do something stupid and awesome.

If Dave was here, what would _he_ do?

Well, you know the answer to _that._ Stupid and awesome it is!

Instead of jumping to the side or whatever, you brace yourself against the stump and then shove off to leap forward at an angle that's going to take you right into a small wolf, blasting it in mid-air and – can you actually do _this?_ Time to find out – kicking it down and trying to use it as a platform to jump farther forward, letting out a burst behind you at nothing in particular to get extra momentum.

... It _totally works._

Unfortunately it also totally tilts you over and you slam into one of the logs lower back first. It knocks the wind right out of you and leaves you all but seeing stars.

Damn it, _damn it_ , ow, that hurts a lot, you don't have time to think about how much that hurts, move, Jade, _move!_

One more burst turns the last of the little guys into sparkles, and you are super super glad you spent way too much of your life learning how to shoot guns really well.

The big one is still moving, though, and it's really big and really mad and honestly really scary. You somehow manage to get back on your feet again, blast it on full auto with at least twenty rounds before it gets to you, but half of them bounce off the plating and the other half definitely don't do enough damage to stop it.

You take a giant claw to the chest and stomach, an upward swipe that lifts you clear into the air and hurls you back at least fifteen feet to smash into the floor.

Oof.

You're suddenly kind of weirdly dizzy and sick and wow you are a mess of pain right now, your dress is actually torn up a little where your aura wasn't enough to completely ward off the damage and you're pretty sure this is going to bruise like crazy. You can also feel a weird, uncomfortable sparking under and over your skin, which you think is the thing sending little waves of nausea through you, and you're pretty sure that means the next hit you soak is going to take your aura out completely.

Come on, come on. You're too close to lose _here!_

It's just _real fast_ , is the thing; you're slower when it comes to basic ground speed and that's most of what you've got right now. So then... you have to change the situation.

If you can't go faster, you've gotta make your target go _slower._

Without bothering to try to stand all the way, you prop yourself up on your elbows and empty the clip aiming forward and low, swinging the barrel of your gun from left to right. The bullets saw both its legs clean off just under the knees and the big bad wolf comes smashing into the ground face-first, flopping over itself and coming to a stop right in front of you.

You switch back to burst, swap in a fresh clip while it's stunned, and get up yet again. It swipes at you in a drunken pretend rage but its swing isn't as fast as its travel speed, so you manage to hop up over those enormous claws.

When you land, you press the barrel of your gun directly against its skull and put three bullets through one side and out the other.

The wolf boss slowly dissolves into shiny death-confetti.

You're sweaty and beat up and you've used up a bunch of ammo and you don't think you can take almost anything more after this. Is there a round four? If there's a round four, then you've failed this thing. You can feel warm little trickles of blood running down your stomach, not a dangerous amount but enough to make it obvious you definitely can't just rely on your aura as if it's a perfect shield.

... But there's no fourth set of beeps. All the tree trunks and logs and stuff vanish. The projectors whirr their way back to their neutral positions and all click off in perfect sync.

You fall down on your butt and let out a big, relieved sigh. Twenty seconds or so later, the door opens again, and the headmaster makes his way across the damaged floor until he's standing over you. He's smiling with a twinkle in his eye. He looks proud, and that makes you feel weirdly like blushing, like doing well enough makes you worth just a little bit more than you were ten minutes ago. He sticks out his hand and helps you back up.

"So, um... was that... did I pass the thing?", you manage through your heavy breaths.

He keeps hold of your hand, shakes it like a non-verbal way of saying 'congratulations.'

"You most certainly did."


	23. Keep Moving Forward (4)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two things.  
> 1) After reading some scenes I've written way ahead of time for, like, volume 3+ content, I realized some of it read like a three-way crossover between RWBY, Homestuck, and like, _Saving Private Ryan_ , so I've pre-emptively just... upped the rating on here to M for gore. Yeah. Uh. Just... so y'all know what you're getting into.  
> 2) Made a tumblr for Lionhearted, since it maybe should hopefully actually finally freaking update more often, and the charge to the end of vol 0 is almost complete! Two more chapters, one of which is written, even. Anyway, check out lionheartedfic.tumblr.com , where there is currently nothing of value whatsoever. Ask questions if you have them, yell at me if you want to I guess, throw ship names at me. Maybe it won't get used for anything, or maybe it will. Let's find out.

_some things are not as they seem_

_holding on tight to yesterday's dream_

_some things are worth fighting for_

_all we need are hearts like yours_

 

[icon for hire – counting on hearts](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IAcTcHWi_k8)

 

* * *

RWBY

 **N** JKA

* * *

 

**27 Days Prior to Beacon**

**Afternoon**

 

You have never had a very important conchversation alone with an adult before, human or not, and it is kind of weird! Humans are less mean, you think, or at least their adults don't _eat_ trolls who are just off-planet, so probubbly you shouldn't furry too much?

He looks nice, anyway! You think? Aliens are weird. Maybe he _does_ want to eat you. Who knows?

... It shore would've been nice to not do this alone. You're a little too used to Blake being around and dealing with alien society. Which, you know, that's somefin you shouldn't want to _rely_ on. You _don't_ want to rely on it, in fact, and why would you? She's fussy and overbearing and so relatable that it hurts, and okay, you're grateful she's helped you out, but...

Ugh. You can't believe you're even a tuna bit pale for an alien. This is the worst. You're sure you'll get over it. It's just something that happens to lonely people. If you're shipwrecked in a weird place full of jerks and nothing makes sense, of course you'll want the first nice person you meet to try to take care of you. No reason to mako a big _thing_ out of it.

Anyway, you should stay focused. The school human just finished shuffling papers around, and now he's looking right at you, all business with shiny bright green adult eyes.

"Miss... hm. Leijon, is it? Forgive me if my pronunciation is off."

"Close enough!" He actually is pretty close! About as close as human vocal cords can get.

"Excellent. I'd like to start by asking a few questions – nothing too invasive, I hope – and then we'll move on to testing your physical capabilities. There is a degree of risk to your health involved in that process, so before we conduct this interview, I'd like to confirm whether or not you consent to that risk."

"Oh, that's fin. It'd be boring otherwise."

He smiles, although he looks a little put off? Or moby he doesn't. You're not pawsitive about alien faces, they're just _wrong_ somescow. The muscles are so _close_ to being normal, but close still doesn't mean you aren't reel unsettled all the time. It's all very uncanny mound-surrounded terrain depression.

"I've heard from Miss Megido that you do not currently exist in any legal system. There is nothing wrong with that, necessarily, but it would be ideal to establish the reason why."

Oh, that's complicated! Hmm. You know, maybe the truth works if you just claw off a detail or two. The less lion you do now, the less you have to remember to lie about later.

"That's probably because I grew up alone with a big cat in a cave!"

He blinks. Hmm. Was that the wrong answer after all? You're ready to bolt if this gets bad, but the atmosphere still isn't tense... You'd like to imagine there's no wrong answer, but the thing about life is that there's _alwaves_ a right answer, _espeshoally_ when you have no idea what it would be.

"But you must have been part of _some_ society to a degree. You seem to be a reasonably educated young woman."

"Aw, thanks! Yeah, I guess so. I had a hustktop, anyway." The adult fur-rows his brow... oh, he doesn't know what that means, does he? Whoops. You really need to stop littering your conversations with words no one here's ever heard. "Uh, I mean... swell, it's something like a scroll?"

"Hmm," he says, writing something down. "I suppose that will do for now."

 _That's_ not ideal. _'For now'_ is sorta worrying. That means somewhere down the line he'll be fishing for more, and you doubt you have any answers that he'd be seagullible enough to believe.

"I don't want to risk insensitivity with my next question, but do you have any surviving family? Close or distant, please."

"Um, I don't really know what a family _is?_ I know _animals_ have families, I'm not _dumb,_ I'm just not sure what that means when it's about people. So I guess I don't have one!"

"... I see. I apologize if I _have_ been insensitive."

"Oh, no, not at all."

He looks sad now? You don't understand humans even one bit. Kanaya _quadranted_ one, so she knows _some_ stuff, but you have soooo close to no frame of refurence. You don't like the thought of this guy pitying you, either, not one bit, even platonically. It's none of hiss business in the first place, school or no school.

... At least he's not confused about the actual words you're saying. Sometimes Blake gets all tangled up with your puns. You're trying to do them a little less meow that Aradia's called you out, but they kind of comes in waves. Schooner or later you're going to get some sentence stuck in your throat like a hairball and sound like an idiot.

"Can you describe any prior combat experience, training excluded?"

"Whale, I've hunted probably hundreds of animals for food, predators and prey, and killed a bunch of monsters in that red forest outside the city. Those are weird, though. No meat at all, not even blood, they're a terribubble catch. The only point to killing them is making them not exist."

"That will do, I think. Your mindset is... _unusual,_ but a background in hunting anything will be a great help to you here. What is your preferred weapon?"

"Claws. I have some bracers with claws right now. They're old and rusty, so that's not good, but it's better than nofin, right?"

"It certainly is." He sort of half-chuckles. "Do you have any experience fighting specifically against humans or other faunus, and, if you'll forgive my asking, have you ever taken the life of another person?"

"Not reely... I was way out in the forest, so I never had to krill anybody. Well, no, I tried to kill a nasty clownfish once beclaws he murdered my m – my best friend, and I think he was going to murder some other people too, but I just got mauled with a club and left for dead so I guess I'm bad at it."

"I'm... sorry for your loss. That must have been a difficult time."

You shrug. He's right, but it's still not his place to act like he cares. You know humans are just _like this_ sometimes, but it makes your fur stand on end.

"What is your reason for wishing to become a Huntress?"

"It's kind of simple, actshoally! I love to hunt, there's a lot of stuff to hunt, and this is the place to practice hunting. If I could make a job out of somefin I would've been doing anyway, isn't that basically perfect? And... well... I don't know. Maybe it's not so simple."

You don't really have the same motives as your fronds; you aren't looking for any lost people, and you're not trying to go 'home;' anywhere that would've been home is gone, and even if it wasn't, you don't think it would feel like home anymore. You're just here to try to be alive, and moby being alive is easier if you _do_ have a big goal like Jade and Kanaya and Aradia, since they're acting _steered_ toward something, so you've been thinking you should give yourself one.

Some unpleasant, flea-ting thoughts have been building in the back of your head as you've watched the world around you. Humans showboating strength they don't even believe in, Faunus failing to pretend at all, hollow catfights with each other and the universe that never do any good. All these predators who've convinced themselves they're prey.

It makes you sick to watch it. It's depressing, and worse, it's _embarrassing._

"Everybody acts like they're in... _cages._ And I know it's not _my_ problem. I catn't worry much aboat how strangers look at things if _I_ want to have my own opinions. But at the same time... agh. I don't know! This whole world is just _wrong._ No one fights for themselves. No one hunts for themselves. So there has to be _some_ big fish out there making ripples. Salmon _important_ who nobody can overlook, an example of how to live. They obviously aren't gonna bother growing up without one."

You take a deep breath.

"... I think maybe that example could be me."

It's an idea you've toyed with these last weeks, your own strange little hopes and dreams slowly taking shape. A lion stays in the shadows, but you're so, so tired of that. You want to live in the moonlight from now on.

The school human looks at you for a long time, right through your eyes, like he's poking down into the trenches of your soul, and you're almost trapped by it – this force you can't identify, not bloodlust but something similar, no cruelty, just... an overwhelming _something_ _,_ and suddenly you get it, you get why you should be a scaredy-cat about adults, human or otherwise.

There's already a _very_ big fish in this pond right now, and it's not you.

"I can't say that's a very common motive, at least the way you've expressed it, but I thank you for your openness. If you _are_ accepted, I think that your time at this school may help to reinforce some of those beliefs. This world certainly does need its examples, Miss Leijon – symbols to show what we can be if we apply ourselves, guardians not only of the individual, but of a better way of life."

A pause, while you wonder to yourself whether it's craysea to be intimidated by a tigershark you're weirdly sure is not going to eat you, now or maybe ever.

"Why study here? Why choose Beacon Academy over another school?"

"It's just... where I am. Also I like the red forest and all the rocky mountains... they sort of remoramind me of home."

"Quite reasonable. Then I shall end this interview with its most important query: Miss Leijon, _who are you?"_

The temperature in the room's gone cold as the deep sea. He _won't_ eat you. He really won't. You know that, somehow, even if it's hard to pinpoint why. Animals have ways of showing what they want, and humans are animals too. Simple stuff is simple to see.

But if he ever _was_ going to do it, it would be after you answer this question.

"I'm a Huntress," you say, because in the end that's the simple truth.

"... That you are," he says, writes down some final note, scoots out his chair, stands up. "Then show me how you hunt."

 

* * *

 

You stalk along after him while he navigates some hallways that eventually end in a big empty room with white floors and ceiling and some odd cattraptions above you and along the walls. It's hard for you to tell what they do; you're kinda used to machines being at least twenty five purrcent bio-engineered nerves and chitin.

"We will be using this facility to simulate a few basic combat situations. I suspect you don't require much in the way of instruction; your opponents may not be entirely real, but they are still capable of causing real harm. Hunt them like you would anything else. I will, of course, deactivate the simulation if things do get out of hand, but that is no guarantee of safety."

"Good! Well, could you reely even learn anything useful if it was?"

He smiles, a twinkle in his eye, and moby that's some of what seemed weird to you. You don't think any of his other expressions really made it to his eyes at all.

And then you're alone in the room, itching to kill something even if it _isn't_ real, whatefur that means. Some kind of drones, maybe? Not, like, _Imperial_ drones, since you'd just instantly be _dead,_ more like regular military ones?

A bunch of the machines light up and whirr and zip around with these eerie clicks and hums that almost remind you of language; the sounds that are missing when humans speak, not exactly words but undertones and inflections.

Ooh! Okay, the prey is all solid photon projections, that makes sense! That _would_ be cheaper than growing and augmenting actual drones. That'll be _so_ unsatisfying to fight, but you'll take what you can get right now.

It's four of the big canines from the forest, except sea-blue and shiny and they smell like ozone instead of ichor and fur. You hope there are going to be more of them than _that._ There must be.

A speaker somewhere starts beeping, counting down maybe? You are so ready.

BOOP.

BOOP.

_BEEEEP!_

The canines fake-growl all tinny and weird and bound across the room in your direction.

You grin and flick your wrists, letting the claws slide out from your sleeves with a satisfying scrape and click. Then you pounce.

The closest one takes a face full of cat and a chest full of cold metal, and you ride it halfway to the ground before it starts to dissolve and you leap off it, slicing the head off another one and kicking that into _another's_ head hard enough to snap its delicate simulated neck bones. The last one tries to pounce on _you_ , so you plunge both sets of claws into its middle and rip it in half.

Little blue sparkles dust the floor as they disintegrate, and then you're alone again.

BOOP.

BOOP.

_BEEEEP!_

You look around and behind you real quick, and ooh, there are _twelve_ little dogfish this time, all in a circle! That's sort of less boring. And some pretend logs and stumps and stuff, too. So this must get more complicated every time. You hope there's more than one kind of monster! If it's just more and more puppies, that'll be a real disappointment.

There's no point in letting them keep you surrounded, so you take the hunt to them, pushing ahead for the three or four right ahead of you, springing over a huge fallen tree and flipping in between a pair, slicing their throats out before tucking into a roll behind the falling corpses and their friends. Your roll put you almost up against another big tree, and that's a good launching point to kick another one to the floor, hook your claws in it and rip out its projection guts, slinging it up and over your head to smash it down onto another one, which seems to keel it instantly.

You're not doing too bad, so far! But you want to mix it up a litter. You twirl through the next one off to your right, rip and toss its arms behind you to take out or at least slow down one _behind_ , shoulder slam its body ahead to block an incoming swipe, duck and cut the legs off the attacker, shred its head into three parts when it flops to the floor. The one behind you's caught up; your limb toss broke one of its arms but it's not quite dead. A quick stab with each claw and you've fixed that.

That gives you good cover to rush forward again, slice one in half at the waist when it swings wide, and hurl yourself off at an angle to close with the last four.

It's getting hard to stay creative with such weak enemies, so you just claw those four to death one by one and yep, that's it for that spawn. You're not even out of breath yet.

BOOP.

BOOP.

_BEEEEP!_

Huh. Four more of these little canines and one taller lionfish. That one has big plates of bone armor all over it and way longer fangs and claws. Maybe that'll keep it alive for more than half a second! The stuff all over the floor changes up, too, and there's a lot more of it, which is interesting. Is that supposed to make things harder? It could for _some_ people... but you're not _some_ people.

The little ones run at you – the real ones are a _little_ less dumb, but not by much – and the big one moves in slower, which is interesting, since it should be faster. If it's smart it'll come fur you while you're busy with its friends, so you'd better keep an eye open.

You cut one up quick – one slice, two slices, and it's done, smack the body out of your way and cut another one's throat, use the body as leverage to hop your quay onto a third one's shoulders and tear out its spine (or at least, the light where a spine _would_ be), let the body flop over and flip across it to disembowel the last one, and that's when the big wolf leaps for you.

It comes smashing down, a massive paw ready to crush you or rip you apart. You don't feel like putting up with that so you slice through a tendon in its wrist-place with a quick upward motion and get some distance. Those plates look thick enough that your claws probably won't do anything. In that case...

While the boss is growling and shaking out its limp arm, you pry a big log up off the floor and hurl it right into its chest. It screams, crushes the log to bits, but you're already on top of it, jamming a set of claws right through each of its huge eye sockets.

It flops sadly to the floor, and vanishes into sparks.

A few seconds go by, and you think maybe you're... done? That was disappointing.

BOOP.

BOOP

_BEEEEP!_

... Or maybe not!

There's only one this time. It's a huuuuge bear, just _massive,_ covered in even thicker armor and all these big long spikes. Whole fake trees rise up from the ground, putting you in a shimmering blue ghost-forest that's a _lot_ more cluttered than the other terrain.

Okay, _this_ one. _This_ could be fun.

The bear roars so hard it strains the speakers, and charges. If this was real you think the ground would shake with every lumber. Is that... hmm. You're not sure that's a word, but you like it anyway.

You backflip out of the way of a giant swing, perch in the branches of a holographic tree and start looking for weak spots. The bone plates do a pretty good job blocking off the joints and the throat is so thick there's probably a lot of blubber protecting anything vital; a bigger weapon could do it, maybe, but not yours. The eyes might be good again... you won't get through that skull otherwise.

It lunges, snaps the whole tree in half. You pounce and cling to a plate on the back of its head, move to hook your claws into its soft bear jelly. It slams a paw in front of its face, armor deflecting you easily... then it topples itself over backward and crushes you under one of its shoulders.

The force is enormous, the simulation of thousands of pounds of monster pinning your stomach to the ground. If you didn't have aura, you'd be spewing guts out of your mouth with a freshly re-shattered spine. Instead it knocks all the wind out of you, leaves you half-numb and tingling, choking down a surge of puke and stomach acid. You stab into its shoulder over and over, tears in your eyes – annoying, involuntary, you can't afford the distraction, _damn –_ and it finally rolls off you, screeching, its right arm dangling loose.

Prying yourself up off the floor is not easy. You can taste copper, and it takes you a second to realize it's blood from where your fang dug into your lip; it's weird, your blood should be thicker and taste more bitter.

The giant monster roars again, and you're not sure which of you made more progress.

When it charges again it's slower, but you aren't going to get it the same way twice. Even if you did it'd just squish you again, and you don't know if you have enough in you to tank another hit like that. It's kind of hard to gauge how much aura you have left until it's almost too late.

You don't wait until the last second this time. There are more trees and you'd betta put those to use. A quick tern and hop puts you a few feet up the side of one, and from there you kick off and up another five feet to the branches of a different one, and then you're leaping from trunk to trunk while it smashes them all to bits. It chases you in a wide circle until you've destroyed at least half the forest.

There. That should be enough. Now it's extra angry, and the wrecked trees have the whole arena filled with ammunition.

You kick a few big chunks of wood into the air and whip them into its face. It'll just block those, obviously, but that's what you _need_ it to do. You keep moving forward, throwing more sharp broken branches and debris to keep it busy covering those shiny eyeballs, and when you're finally close enough you launch at it. Without its other arm to back it up, the functional one's as much of a weakness as it is a weapon. You dig your claws into _that_ arm just above the armor, twist until something pops loose, and then both those big paws are just hanging at its sides, worse than useless, and it has nothing left to defend itself.

The bear thrashes around, screaming. You pounce, cut open its neck, and when it swings its face down to keep you from cutting in deeper, you shove your arm up and into its mouth and punch your claws through into its brain.

It teeters for a moment before it falls like a broken mast, and the corpse dissolves slower than the others. _Now_ you're breathing hard, eyes wide, sizzling with epinephrine, waiting for the next wave.

The machines buzz and slipstream away, back to where they started.

... Aww.

A door buzzes open and the school human walks in.

"... That was _all?"_ , you whine.

He laughs, and this time you think his smile beaches his eyes.


	24. Keep Moving Forward (5)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Spooky Day, folks! It is 1 am here and I am about to drink a _lot_ of vodka.
> 
> Check out the blog at http://lionheartedfic.tumblr.com if you haven't yet! There is fanart already, somehow!

_see you in the room next door, your feet float above the floor_

_dress torn above your knees like you've worn it for centuries_

_dots and dashes on the wall, you tell me about the fall_

_of kingdoms and champions you've seen a thousand times before_

 

[silversun pickups – dots and dashes (enough already)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4NWkScIqEM)

 

* * *

RWBY

NJK **A**

* * *

**27 Days Prior to Beacon**

**Afternoon**

 

As a rule, humans are fun and interesting. _This_ human, though? Now _this_ human is _very_ interesting. Hardly anyone has the kind of control over their dreams as he was showing! He was actually completely lucid even before you got there, and it didn't seem like that was new to him.

Also, he was pretty nice about the whole 'coming to your school last-minute by contacting you in your sleep' thing, which raises a lot of questions that you'd _love_ answered. You're pretty sure he wouldn't have done it if you _didn't_ ask him in his dreams, and most people, aliens or not, seem like they'd have the opposite reaction.

Maybe he just wants information, but even if that's the case, the fact is that Ozpin did this for the same reason you do basically everything: _because it would be interesting._

If you can respect anything, it's the desire to avoid boredom.

Speaking of, he's finished gathering papers from around the room and is sitting down right in front of you. Wow, he is _super_ tall! Human adults usually don't seem to get as huge as some trolls would, and sure, he's not _ten_ feet tall or anything, but still. He's noticeably towering even when he's not standing. It's probably very intimidating.

"Good evening, Miss Megido. I'm glad you could make it. How was your flight?"

"Oh, it was fun! I spent most of my time mapping the endless void that connects all subconscious minds and trying to set up a system to loosely match the coordinates of dreamers there to physical locations on the planet itself."

"I must confess, I've rarely encountered a Semblance as unusual as yours. The utility is enormous."

"Yep! Makes it basically impossible to get bored, too."

"What is it like, may I ask? How does it feel to open your eyes to the back-door of every mind on the planet, with total freedom to move among them?"

"It's like being a goddess. Which I actually used to be, and it's a little unfortunate that I'm a mortal again now, but hey, you make the best of things, right? As long as I'm still alive, I'm happy."

He smiles. He has an interesting smile! It looks really practiced, but not dishonest, which is a weird little paradox that raises even more questions. You don't know what this guy's life was like, but you're guessing it was pretty wild.

"I'd like to start by asking a few questions – nothing too invasive – and then we'll move on to testing your physical capabilities. There is a degree of risk to your health involved in that process, so before we conduct this interview, I wish to confirm whether or not you consent to that risk."

"Yeah, no problem!"

"Wonderful. Now, you told me before that you do not currently exist in any legal system. There is nothing particularly wrong with that, but I would like to know why."

"I'm not really from around here! I used to exist in _one_ legal system, but there really wasn't any overlap with yours."

"In that case... what legal system _did_ you exist in?"

"Oh, a vast tyrannical empire in which I was the lowest possible social caste, where people were forced to reproduce in ways beneficial to the species or be casually executed, and violent oppression was specifically encouraged among children."

He stares for a long moment.

"It was annihilated," you shrug. "You wouldn't have heard of it."

"I would like to hear more about this later," he says, "as it is in fact _quite_ impossible, and yet I see no indication whatsoever that you're lying."

Wow, this guy is not a sucker at all, is he? Neat! This must be a really interesting school with somebody that complicated at the head. You're getting more excited by the second!

"Do you have any surviving family, whether close or distant?"

"I never had any in the first place! The idea doesn't really make sense to me. How do sentient creatures grow up in the same building without killing each other? _There's_ one of life's great mysteries, if you ask me."

"In my experience, family tends to breed more positive emotions than negative, though there are certainly some... unfortunate exceptions. I would offer my condolences, but you don't appear to require them."

"Nope! Thanks though!"

He takes some notes. The look on his face is tough to decode, but he seems very focused. He's holding up real well so far! Hardly rattled at all, just... _intrigued._ You think that if you weren't in the middle of an interview, he'd have a whole lot more questions for you, and the truth would get a lot more complicated to hide in itself.

"Can you describe any prior combat experience? Training excluded, please."

"Whoo, that's a tough one to summarize. I've been in hundreds of fights, probably, mostly with monsters, sometimes not. Sometimes with weapons, sometimes without them."

You shrug. You're not going to try to get into psionics, since your Semblance is something completely different. It's a shame you lost those, too, but adapting to fighting without them should be a lot of fun, and you losing one power just means you'll have the focus to get a lot better with the skills you have left.

If anything it's your time powers you miss, but you like existing, and it's a little bit sad to think of slaughtering hundreds more of yourself. You'd _do_ it, but you'd feel kinda guilty.

"What _is_ your preferred weapon?"

"I'm pretty versatile these days! Right now I have this neat sword whip and a revolver. The whip takes off heads _real_ smoothly! I'm not super familiar with guns, so that's taking a little effort, but it's been worth it so far."

"An interesting combination. I hate to ask, but... have you ever taken the life of another person?"

Oh boy, have you ever! You're not very good at being angry anymore, and you really don't have any grudges left over from the past, but beating Vriska into a whiny pulp is still a _great_ memory.

"Once, but she got better. She was a murderer, anyway, plus she killed me _first,_ so I'm not going to lose any sleep over it."

There's another long pause while he processes that sentence.

"I got better too."

He doesn't reply to that one directly, but he spends a while writing notes before he moves on.

"What is your reason for wishing to become a Huntress?"

"Hmm... A few reasons, I guess. It's a good job for someone who wants to travel a lot, and that's very important. I have a lot of research to do – picking apart ancient ruins, uncovering the secret history of the world, searching for any unexpected gateways to other universes – that kind of thing. This gives me a great framework to do all that, plus extra combat training for dealing with unfathomable monsters that inhabit those dark places, and I get paid. Win/win/win, you know?"

"Interesting. May I ask what your interest in these ancient mysteries is, besides valuing history for its own sake?"

"You know, I do want to find a way back to a certain place, but I don't have a ton of investment in that _myself._ It's just a bit of direction to doing the things I already _do_ love just for their own sakes. I guess if I had to say one other thing... well... there's a _person_ I'd like to see again. He might already be here somewhere, and he might not. If he is, then I'm sure I'll find him eventually, and if he's not, maybe I can get back to where he is."

You frown, just for a second, try not to scratch an itch at the base of one of your horns. (You're not too interested in manners, but you'd rather not be _lewd.)_

"If I never do see him again, that'll be sad, but that's just how life is sometimes... I'll keep on living, and I'll keep on learning, and I'll keep on having fun."

"I can't help but wonder what sort of life you've had to develop such a point of view. To be frank, your friends appear to have lived quite unusually as well."

"Pretty much anybody I know is going to be real unusual!"

"So it seems. What is your reason for choosing Beacon Academy over another school?"

"My friend has some contacts in Vale, so it seemed more convenient to come here than stay where I was! Also I _might_ have made a few enemies in Vacuo? Sometimes it's tough to tell who wants to kill you because they have a grudge and who just likes killing, y'know? Either way, I figured it'd be good to make a clean break."

"In that case, I shall end this interview with my last and most important question."

He leans in a little bit and stares deep into your eyes, or at least he tries to, and wow, adults really _are_ scary, probably! Suddenly just being here makes you realize how small you really are, like there's a sense of power and mystery and _scale_ to him that was only sort of there before, easier to miss.

You like that feeling a lot. Small things have _so much more fun_ dissecting big things than the other way around.

"Miss Megido... _who are you?"_

You give him your biggest, cheeriest smile.

"I'm an alien death goddess from another dimension!"

 

* * *

 

Ozpin leads you to a big open room with human machines poking out of the walls and ceiling. Human technology is _weird!_ None of it even leaks pus when it's busted, which is just creepy. Anyway, you're not completely sure what those are for, but you've got some ideas – transportalizers don't seem likely, you're not sure this planet has that kind of tech, but maybe projectors? If they're projectors they'd better at least be the solid photon type or else you'll be _super_ let down.

"We'll be using this facility to simulate a few basic combat situations. I doubt that you require much in the way of instruction, considering your apparent status as an incarnation of death, but it would do to keep in mind that they are capable of causing real harm. I will deactivate the simulation if things get out of hand, but that is no guarantee of safety."

"Cool! Let's do this."

He nods and heads back out through a door that all but disappears behind him. Neat.

You are just _itching_ for some action. You haven't fought anything in at least a week, and with nothing else interesting to do around here, you've build up some serious energy to vent.

The machines light up and zoom all over the place, clicking and making other odd noises. It makes you want to click back, but you don't even have secondary vocal chambers anymore, so _that's_ not happening. Oh, you were right! It _is_ solid photon projections. That'll do!

Looks like you're up against four beowolves, spun out of bright blue light. There had better be more than one round.

Speaking of rounds, a sound system somewhere you can't see starts making fun noises like it's counting down to the start of an annihilation chariot death race.

BOOP.

BOOP.

_BEEEEP!_

The Grimm just go ahead and rush you, which saves you a little trouble.

You give them a second, sensually remove your sword-whip from its sheath, and then _lunge_ , closing the remaining ten feet and perforating one with a few swift thrusts. A twist of the wrist loosens the blade inside its torso and a firm tug rips it free in a widening arc, lashing the eyes out of the second-nearest. _That_ one screeches, stumbles into its two living buddies; you snap the blade back into itself, quick-draw your revolver, and clean them out with three clean headshots.

What's left of the poor little pretend monsters flakes and scatters across the floor. You whistle a little tune to yourself (crisp, eerily lacking in resonance), pop open the pretty little piece of machinery and slip in three spare rounds from one of your belts.

BOOP.

BOOP.

_BEEEEP!_

The projectors beam out a bunch more beowolves, which is a little disappointing, but hey, maybe there's more variety soon? They also set up a bunch of broken-up tree pieces and stumps and stuff; the plot thickens! Well, your environment clutters, maybe. Still! Something's probably thickening somewhere. When isn't it?

Glancing around, you count eleven or twelve new friends, and they're already _very_ enthusiastic about saying hi. You decide to say hi first.

One, two, three shots, and that's three crumpled in around the chest and blasted into meaningless light. They're really nice simulations. You're already familiar with the way your bullets tend to cave in sternums, and this is _on point._ Four, five, six! That's a hello and goodbye to half your new buddies, but the other ones will just have to get by without any flashiness; you'd like to save some ammo, and they're leaping in for hugs anyway.

You unlock your sword and lay out a couple wide sweeps, ripping hundreds of blue splinters out of several fake wolves. God, you love crowd control. While those ones try to adapt to their new, extra-lacerated lives, two of them get within clawing distance. You pistol-whip one's skull right in and pull the actual whip back through the other one's neck, popping its head _right_ off. That never gets old!

Four friends to go, and they're on you now, flurries of sharp claws falling in. You duck under one, impale its whole head up through the chin, tug the blade back out and slice the knees out of another. When it falls you stomp its head into sapphire glitter, parry a set of incoming claws with the side of your revolver and pierce deep into its non-existent guts.

The last one _almost_ grazes you before you whack the most recent corpse sideways, bowling it over and leaving it half-pinned to the floor.

"Hello!", you say, wave with your gun, and drive your sword down through its heart and through the tile. "Goodbye!"

You have juuuust enough time to load another six bullets before the beeps come back, five regular and one... _special._

BOOP.

BOOP.

_BEEEEP!_

Hmm! The terrain changes up, adding a lot more obstacles and randomizing their positions, and five more Grimm spawn in: four more regular beowolves and one big alpha, all scarred armor and thick spines. That one ought to hold up for more than one or two hits.

You _might_ be able to pick off all four of the little ones before any of them get to you, but it'd be a waste to pour four shots into it and then just have to reload again right away when there's an alpha around, especially now; you're still getting used to loading this thing and it takes you a few solid seconds to get it from empty to full.

Good thing you trusted your gut for that last reload.

The alpha is pretty much dead center and only a couple feet behind the others, which is _perfect._ You've got an odd little mechanism built into your gun to cycle the cylinder without actually firing – making your own weapons is the _best_ – so you hit that thing a couple of times, take aim, and fire.

You've been experimenting with lots of really cool stuff lately, especially with mixing up different types of Dust; you can't afford _too_ much of that right now, even with the petty crime you _totally_ didn't get up to back in Vacuo, but you did prepare a handful of one reliable cocktail in time for this whole test thing.

Basically, it's a hollow-tipped projectile with a couple of features. When it hits, the front crumples inward and sets off an inner reservoir of explosive mix. _That_ ignites an outer layer of earth and fire dust, blowing out a wave of actual flames and generating a bunch of chunks of rock that immediately shatter into shrapnel, some of which is very solid and some of which ends up being nice and molten.

You've been calling these little beauties _volcano rounds,_ because it sounds awesome.

The recoil is huge, you would not be able to shoot _these_ heavy pupas off one-handed without either aura or psionics to keep things steady. It's _so_ worth it, though.

You nail the alpha right in the chest and while the impact doesn't kill it, just knocks it back a bit, the round detonates into a sweet fireball and a nova of super-heated stone splinters that totally shred all four of the regular beowolves, tiny spikes punching through their backs as they're burned into imitation ash.

Using these things always puts _such_ a big smile on your face.

The alpha isn't dead, but it's not looking great, either! You're not about to give it time to turn this around on you (not that it really could in any significant way, honestly), and you have five regular shots left. With all of the damage, you think maybe you can actually brute-force this, and you're curious to see if you're right so you just go right ahead and unload the rest of the cylinder into its chest plating.

The first two shots push it back even further, cracking away at the holographic bone. The third crushes its way through, the fourth sinks in deep, and the fifth finally blows a fist-sized hole all the way through its spine and out its back.

You blow a bit of smoke off of the barrel of your gun, because you can, and then you load up all three of your remaining volcano rounds along with three more standard bullets. If there's another round you'd like to be prepared for the escalation.

BOOP.

BOOP.

_BEEEEP!_

Ooooh, just one this time, but it is a _big_ sucker, wow, _alright_ then! You've never seen a real one of these, since they're not at all native to any of the other places you've been, but you've done your research and that is definitely an alpha ursa, which is really fun to say. Hopefully it's just as much fun to kill.

The armor on this thing is _crazy_ and it has spikes big enough that it could probably stack two corpses on its back and still be able to poke things. You're not going to be able to brute force your way through that exoskeleton.

To make things even more exciting, the terrain all randomizes again, but this time with whole actual solid photon _trees_. They are _extremely_ pretty, too, all overlapping transparent blue leaves and branches. You love this school already.

The ursa bellows so loud it actually shakes the trees. Dang, who _programmed_ all of this? Talk about quality work.

Oh, you should maybe pay more attention to the actual bear! It's bounding toward you, snapping logs and smashing stumps with every move. Okay, hmm. How are you going to go about this? Limiting its mobility would be a good start, if you can manage that...

Just before it bowls you over, you lash out at its face and throw yourself aside. Unfortunately it just smacks your whip away with a giant paw, skids across the floor, and lunges again. You'd rather not take that head-on, so you try to get some distance, wrapping the whip around a nearby tree trunk and leaping for it, tripping the mechanism to retract the blade again for extra momentum, detaching in time to flip around and get your gun ready.

The ursa crushes a couple of trees into sparkling debris, roars again, and starts up a third charge. Okay, time to change things up a little. You wait until it's closing in, a little uncomfortably close even, and fire a volcano round in between its front legs and under its belly. The blast doesn't seem to do much actual harm, but it _does_ lurch upward, throwing itself off course.

You take the opportunity to whip its face again, and it's too busy scrabbling at the floor to block. Oh, _nice!_ That's one eye totally gone. The big bear screams and rears up high; you wish its belly wasn't armored, because this would be the perfect chance to just put a volcano round into its center of mass and watch it rupture.

Instead you dash forward, retracting back into sword mode again, and jam the blade through a gap in the armor at the top of one meaty thigh. _That_ should slow it down!

... huh. Where'd the bear go and why is the world spinning?

Your head cracks against the floor and damn near chips a horn, ow, _ow,_ not fun, and then you thump into a tree, which finally stops your wild roll across the floor.

Uuuugh. You do not feel great right now! Just about everything hurts, especially your stomach and chest, and you seem to have lost your sword, which is very not good! The thing must have just swiped you across the front and sent you flying. That's what you get for not playing it safe, you guess. Hoo _boy._

By the time you're halfway to your feet, the ursa's halfway caught up to you. It would have gotten there already if not for the damage your stab did, so that wasn't a waste, at least! The big guy's moving with a nasty limp.

Okay, take stock. It's slowed, in simulated pain, and it's missing an eye. You're sort of dazed and your melee weapon is lying on the ground like fifteen feet away. Not ideal, but not a loss by any means!

You fire two bullets at its face; it shields itself with its paw again but ends up covering its good eye, giving you a precious second to get the heck out of the way and scramble for your sword.

Unfortunately, one second isn't enough, and the dang thing is on you again, slamming a paw down to crush you. You tuck into a roll and just barely make it away in time, shooting for its face again with your last regular bullet, then sprint the remaining distance, scooping up your missing weapon and pivoting on the spot to whip it as fast as you can.

This time, though, you have a different target in mind, locking the whip around that stupid paw that keeps getting in your way around the elbow and pulling it taut until the blades have sunk into its elbow joint.

You prop one leg against a stump for leverage, blast it in the shoulder with a volcano round, and let the force of the explosion rip half its arm clean off.

Then you swing the arm back around and smack it in the face.

 _"Bad_ ursa! See? Not any fun for you either, is it?"

While the thing is reeling, you let the arm fly off over your shoulder, breaking some tree branches if you're hearing right, step in closer, stab it through the other elbow joint to keep its head wide open, shove the barrel of your revolver under its chin, and liquefy its head.

The freshly decapitated bear flops sadly to the ground, and the projectors shut down, zipping off back to their starting positions. You raise your gun up high and cheer.

A few seconds go by before the door you came in through slides open again.

"Man, I _love_ today," you say. The headmaster laughs.

"Yes, I noticed."

 

* * *

RWBY / NJKA

~{ **O** }~

* * *

  **A few minutes later**

 

Once the girls have rendezvoused and gone off on their way, you take the long walk to your office, settle in at your desk, and prepare to go over your notes.

It has been a most interesting evening. All three of your new students proved quite capable; Miss Harley's performance was the weakest by far, but you can't expect a ranged specialist to perform at her best when fighting alone with an incomplete weapon. Miss Megido's versatility is frankly quite impressive for someone her age, even if her attitude is a bit... _troubling._ Miss Leijon made the largest impression on you, not so much for her noteworthy skills as for her outlook on life and her ambition. The world needs more people like her, and unless it chooses to crush her young, you think she will likely go far.

... However, your real concern is that all three of them seem to hail from somewhere that cannot logically exist anywhere in this world, and their vague descriptions of it – not to mention unusual personalities – remind you far too much of a few other people you have had the dubiously mixed fortune of meeting.

There is a thread that connects all of them: students with impossible histories, underworld figures operating outside the bounds of the rational world, vigilantes with connections to tight-lipped friends of friends, mysterious employees of a trusted colleague. Someday you _will_ follow this thread to its source. You _will_ uncover the truth, however deeply buried it may be, no matter what dark future it may portend.

If you don't, you suspect there will be no future at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have this feeling some of y'all are gonna be angry at me next chapter... On the bright side, it is the epilogue to volume 0! It's been a lot longer getting here than I wanted, but still, here we are.
> 
> Speaking of next chapter, it's actually already finished (I think?) so I'm just gonna do a bit of editing and possibly minor expansion and it should be postable in a day or three.


	25. Toxicity Of Our City

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out the blog at http://lionheartedfic.tumblr.com if you haven't yet!
> 
> (i want to die after all this formatting, someone please execute me)

_taking back wasted time that we have spent_

_walking round wastin', tracing back the steps_

_oh i can taste it, the secrets i have kept_

_walking round wasted and i'll take what i can get_

 

[ _porter robinson_ _–_ _polygon dust_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1ZhnSNN8UI)

 

* * *

  **13 Days Prior To Beacon**

 

turntechGodhead (TT) opened relay with  gardenGnostic (GG)

 

TG: good goddamn am i seein things or is that jade harley all late to the game

GG: omg, DAVE????

GG: i thought i'd have to

GG: i was scared i'd never see you again

GG: i had this horrible feeling i'd be searching for years

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

TG: but look im just glad i found you so dont feel bad about it alright

TG: it is what it is

TG: haha wow i just

TG: aint quite sure what to make of this

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

GG: dave?? are you there? It says there's a connection problem or something

TG: great well that figures

TG: yeah receptions not so good out here

TG: look jade i cant talk long right now

TG: not with a crap relay and not with these handles

GG: wait, what does that mean?

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

TG: and that would be bad

TG: worse than bad

TG: i cant lose you not after all of this time

GG: dave i'm not getting all of this!! where are you?

TG: oh middle of nowhere basically

TG: not really important just some village got macked on by monsters

TG: you know how it is

TG: like i said though i guarantee "somebody" knows youre here already

TG: "somebody" seems to know damn near everything these days

GG: okay um i'm trying to follow this i'm just very excited and also kind of freaking out!

GG: are you trying to say we're being... watched?

TG: of course were being watched

TG: so im gonna say whats got to be said and then come find you

TG: where are you

GG: um, didn't you just say... all of that stuff?

TG: yeah but fact of the matter is she knows where you are by now

TG: its too late now that you logged in with this handle so who cares

GG: too late for what?! dave please just talk to me

TG: where are you

GG: agh!! i'm in vale, i'm staying with a friend

GG: i'm trying to, um, become a huntress? but maybe i shouldn't, now? i'm confused

GG: you sort of came out of nowhere!

TG: oh for real youre really on it huh

TG: absolutely do that you gotta get tough as hell as fast as you can

TG: jade i hate to be the bearer of crap news but uh

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

TG: wait who is this friend i need to know if youre safe

TG: is it a troll or somebody from this planet

GG: a girl i met the night i came here, which was only a couple of weeks ago. ruby. she's a sweetheart.

TG: hold up ruby what gimme a last name

GG: ruby rose, why?

TG: wow

TG: sometimes you get to thinkin maybe destiny aint real

TG: and then its on you like flashbacks to the ho chi minh trail

TG: all seein some poor fools scroll go off during dinner and flipping over the table for a barricade

TG: a steak splats on the floor

TG: pink like sarges brains when the snipers came

GG: dave oh my god, the important stuff gets cut off but all of this makes it through?

TG: yo so anyway rubys good people alright

TG: that theres a whole family you can trust so stick with them if you can

TG: you gotta get a new handle, spread it around to any friends you can find

TG: if you know anybody whos already done it then use them to spread the news try to keep it on the down low

TG: just a couple more things before i go

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

TG: and i really really hate bearing even more bad news here but johns kinda

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

GG: what? you found john?! what happened to him?

TG: but hey at least hes not dead gotta look on the bright side

TG: found rose too a long while back and thats even more complicated

\- failed to receive message from TG due to connection error!

TG: wanna believe i can trust her but i dont know who to trust anymore

GG: how could you not trust rose? i don't understand

GG: dave you're scaring me!!

TG: im myself and i think john is too and i hope rose still is but some of us are different

TG: the ones that woman found and the ones who got found by the ones she found

GG: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

GG: every time you try to explain something it all glitches out again! it's the worst

TG: i gotta go this things about to disconnect plus the batterys near dead

GG: dave, hold on!

GG: ... i love you.

TG: wait like a friend or

GG: yes like a friend you dork!

TG: oh thank god then i love you too i guess

TG: dont get killed

TG: tell ruby uncle dave said hi

GG: tell her WHAT????

 

turntechGodhead (TT) closed relay with gardenGnostic (GG)

 

* * *

**8 Days Prior To Beacon**

 

\- ͟t̵wil͏itT̨hȩoris̴t͠ ͘(TT̡)͘ o̕pen͏ed re͠l͡a͟y͠ ̷wi̸th  gravenAdvisor (GA)

 

Ṭ̷̖̜̻̗T͎̱̠:͖̖̞̥̩̜̘ ̳͇̩H͇̳͈̺͉̞͢e͎̹͎͖͠l͚ḻ̠o͏͕̗̰̣,̻͕̝̱͚ ̧̻̙̭Ka̷̞̠̖̱̣͓͇ṇ̢̖͔̜̩a̠̬̯͘y̘͔̝a.̹

GA: Rose

GA: Is That You

TT̛:̸ Of ̧co҉u͝r͟s͢e̴. I̛t'̡s͜ ̨b͏een ̸a wh͞i͘le.̢ I d͜o hǫpe̢ ̡yo͟u'̷r͠e we҉ll̶.͏

GA: I Am So Glad Youre Alive

GA: You Really Are Rose Right

GA: Im Sorry I Shouldnt Ask Its Just That Your Handle Is Different

T̛T:̵ ̸So͟ i҉s̛ yǫu̴rş.

GA: Fair Enough

GA: Wait How Did You Know This Handle

GA: I Would Have Thought Youd Message The Old One

T̡T: ͏Well͏,̢ ͡I'͏ve͜ t͜ak͡en p͜r͟ec͏a͘utio͘n͞s ҉to͠ ̴a͢void̵ ̧an̸y surv͜eill͠an̶ce,̨ b͟u͠t ̡one ̛ca̡n͏ n̷ęv͜er͝ be̛ ̴too͟ car͠efu͏l ͢i̧n̶ thi̴s̢ ͏da͞y͏ an͟d̷ a͠ge.

ŢT̨: ̶H̡o͏pef͏u̵ll͜y̕ yo͞u̵ ha҉ve ͟no̴ idea̧ ͏w͠hat̷ ͡I'm ͜tal͟ki͢n͞g abo̸ut͠.

GA: I Really Dont

GA: Rose Do You Have Any Idea What Is Going On

GA: Why Were Stuck Here

T̵T̢: Ḩmm҉. I͜'d like ̛t͞o ̸th̡i͏n̛k̕ I͞ ̧h͠av̴e͠ ̷som̶e ̛i͝d̛ea w͡h̨at's ̕goin͟g o͏n͜, b̢u͡t̸ I o҉nly h̢ave th͝eor҉i̵es͝ ͢ąb͝o͠u̕t ̷wh͘y̛ ̶w͡e'͘re he͡re̡.  


TT̶: I ha̢ve̕ ͘a ̴l҉ot of t͠h҉e͞orie͢s͝ l͏ate͟ly, ͜a̸nd̕ ver͞y ̨fȩw ̨c̢o͢nc҉r̷e͟t͡e͢ a̷nsw͟e̶rs͏,͞ e҉x̸c̶ept ̸th͢o̷se̶ to qu̧es̶tion͡s̴ ̕I̵'d͠ rat͞h͟e̕r not̷ have f͘o̸und ̛an҉swęr̨s͡ ̛to ͞a̶t ̸a̸ll.̧

GA: I See

T҉T: I ̡k̷neẃ ͜y͏oų wo͜uld͢ ҉b̢e͝ h̛erè,̡ ̨an͜d ̴I ͡apo͏l͡og͟i̧z͡e̕ ͡d̴eepl͏y ̵fo̴r҉ ͘t͏ak̴i͢ņg ̵s̴o͏ l̵ong̛ ͢t͡o̶ ̸co͝nt̛a̷ct you͝.͏ ̴It͜'̕s ̵bee̷n͢ c͝h͡a͞l̶len͘g̕inģ to ̕fi͟n͝d ̡a̡ ͞s̨a͘f̛e enoug҉h ̨m̴o̡m̶e͠n͜t͏ ͠to ͘t̵a̵k̶e ̴the r̸i͏s̛k̨. ̕

TT: ͞How ͘do ͜I put ͠th͏is͝...

T͢T: I͘t̕'s̸ poss͞i͜ble ̡I̡'vȩ m͘a͜d͢e s͏o҉m͟e ve̕r͢y ̡p̨o̡o͝r ͏l̢i̵f̵e c҉hoic̵e͢s.̶

GA: That Does Sound Like Classic Rose To Me

GA: How Did You Know I Would Be Here

GA: Do You Mean That Literally Or Is This More Of A Never Losing Faith Kind Of Thing

TT:̷ ̵O͠h̢, ͘I҉ ̛mean ͟it͡ v̧e͢ry̨ lįter̛al̕l̢y. ̴I h̢a̴ve ͞fr͜ien͏ds ̵in̛ ̨th̶e ̴h̡i̴g̵hest ̸o̡f p̸laces,̸ and҉ c̨o͞nt͡įn̴genc̡ies in place t̸o ͞n͟ot̶if͘y ̸me of ̡a ͠g̕r͘e͡at̴ de͡al̛ ͘o̴f th̸in͡g͡s̵.

TT̡: K͢an̶ayą... ̢I.̵.͢. ̕

TT̸: G̶od̵.͢ The͜re̷'͢s ͝so͜ m̧ųc̛h t͡ǫ ͜s̡ay̧, an̸d̶ I͡ jus̷t͏ ̛d̛on̸'t͟ hav̸e͞ ͟t̶he̷ ͠lux̴u͝r̨y o͝f͝ taki͠ng͏ m͞y ti̸me.̧

TT̵:̶ ̨I̛ k̡now̨ t̶his̨ is̢ ҉all ver̴y n̨e͢w͏ t͘o ͝you͘, b̸u̶t̴.͢..̧ ̶it's n͞ot̷ n͘e͜w to ͟me.

GA: Please Tell Me You Dont Mean Youve Been Here For Years Or Something Equally Awful

TT̨: ...̧ ̶ab̢out ̶th̨at.

GA: Oh God

TT: I͏t̷.̨..͘ c̨o̷u͘ļd͝ be w͏o̵rs̶ę.̛ ̕D̡on't͝ d͜are͠ p̧i̵ctu͠re ̨m̶e̶ ͡as̡ ̕so͞m҉e̸ wi̛ther̷e͞d̡ c͏rone̛.

͟TT: ͜I̵'l̶l ̷b͝e ͢t̡wȩn̨t͞y͞ ͠one thi̸s co̡min͟g w͏i͜n̴t̶e͡r.̛

GA: Oh

TT̢: Y̢es.̕ I͘t̢'͠s..̛. w̴el̛l.

҉T̕T̸: Let͏ me ̶be̶ ͞fr̷a͏nk͘.̡ ͞T̕hi͜ngs a͞r̸e̶ v̷ery̴ bad o̷n҉ tḩis ̶plan͟et, a͟ņd t̨he͞y͡'͏r͏ę ͢ab̢ơut to get ̸q̢ui͠t͠e a b̷it wo͢r̕se.̶ The t͡h̕ing̵s I̢ ̡a͏m̷ doing͢ ͠are̵ ͘įn ͜s͢e͡rv̕ice͝ of mi͝ti̡g҉ating̕ th͢a͞t dam͞a̕g͡e, ͘b͟ut ͠w͘hat̡ ̧I͘'ve ̧dǫne̸ to̧ ̧give ͡my̢se͏lf ͠s̷u͞c̴h̴ i̧n҉f͟luen̡c͞e i͞s..̛.͠

̵TT:̡ ̕M҉ayb͘e I̢ c̨oul̵d ͟have ͏done͠ s͡om̛e͡t̴h̛in̴g ̴b͜e҉tter̢.̕ ̡Been̷ ͡s̛o͠m̧ęone̷ bette̶r͞.͞

TT̷: But̢ ͟I d̡idn'͟t, ҉and ̶I͜'̵m̨ ̵not̷.̨

GA: Rose I Hardly Know What To Say

T͘T:͠ ͠I s̵til̴l ̛lov̷e͢ y͡o͡u, if ͟y͘o̢u̴'re͜ ̕w̷on͘deri͝ng҉, bu̸t̨ I̵ d͞on͝'t͟ ̢k̶n̴o̕w ͡t̵h͜a͜t ̧the ̢pers̴o̢n ͞I̷ a̕m ͟is c͞apab͘le̢ o̶f the͟ ̵s͠a̴m̴e҉ s͝o҉r̸t o҉f̨ l̨o͞v̡ȩ I u͠s̕ed ͘t͠o͟ ̛be.͟ I͘'͜v҉e̛ ̧s̶p̵en͟t͢ ͜s͞o͡, ͝so͘ ̴m̶an̴y ̶things.

T͝T: A̡s̕ a̢go͘niz͘ing as i͡t̛ ̢i̵s ̕to fin̢al͡ly have tǫ s̴a̸y ̡t̛h͘is...̢

T̶T̵:̷ ̵Pl͜e̢as͝e̸ ͡don͠'t͜ ͡w̸ai̕t̸ ̕f̴or̢ me͢,̶ Ka̶na̧ya.̧

T̨T: Try̴ to love some̸o͘ne̕ ̴w͡ho ̕des̛e͝rve̢s ̷y̸ou͟.

GA: I

GA: Please Dont Say That

GA: You Cant Mean That

GA: Are You Breaking up With Me

T͡T: ͜Th͠a͏t'҉s ̢ju̡st t͟he҉ ͢t̕hin҉g҉.̵.. ̧t͢here'͏s n͡o̢t͘ḩing ͞l͞e͜fţ ̢to ̷b͠r͘e̕ak.̕

T͜T҉:̧ Hm.̶

T̕T:̡ ̷I ̷h̵a̷dn'̨t͜ ̧re̡a̧liz͜e͞d͢ ̡I̸ ͏was sti̢ll a̕b͠le ̨t̵o̷ ̧c̸ry.̷ How͞ u̢n̶fort̵unate.

GA: Rose What Have You Done

TT͜:̴ ̷S̸o͢me̶one ̴will be̴ alo̴n̷g ͝t҉o̧ ch͜eck ̸on ̧me̷ ͠so̢on̴;͘ ͡I͜'ve̡ ̛su҉spe̷n̸ded͝ m͠y͟s͏e͜lf ͞from our n̷etw͡o͘rk̴,͘ ̕an̛d̨ that's ͠go̸in̡g͝ t̨o ͞l͟ea̛ve a͞ f̷e͟w peo͘p҉le̕ ͏con͢cerņęd͟, ͡g̷iv͟e͏n͟ ̧t̵h̢e͘ n͠atu͏re͜ of ҉m̴y abi҉lit̷i̢es̴.̛

T̴T: W͠h̶ate͠ve͞r I ҉do̡, ͝I̕ ҉musn̷'t le̵t ͏h҉ȩr ̶b͜e̛gi͢n̨ to ̶sus̡pect̢ me.͘ ͞I ̨c͏a̸nnot ͘af҉fo͏rd͠ t͝o ḑie̕ yet.

GA: Rose

GA: Dont Go

GA: Dont Leave Me Like This

TT: P̷l̷e͠as͏e ͏take ca͝re of̶ y̛o̧urse͜lf͝.̷ Pleas͏e s͝tay ̶a͝l͡i͞vę. ͜P̨lęa͝şe ̧don̛'̸t ͠t͢orture͜ yo̵ur̸self͢ ͏o͜n ͟m̛y̨ ͜a̶cc̛ơu̷nt.͜

̸TT: A̴nd͢ ̨wḩate͞v͠e͏r you ͢do͘..͢. ̵ḑo̕n't g͟o j͏o͏inin͡g ̷an̴y̵ ͠empir̵es̢.

GA: Please Dont Just Disappear

GA: I Love You Rose

GA: So Much

TT:͞ ͟I̕ k͠n͟o̷w̕.̶

-̡ ҉tw̕ili͠tT͞h͠e̵oris̡t ͟(TT̡)͘ cl͏ose͝d͢ ŗela͝y ͜with  gravenAdvisor (GA)

 

* * *

**5 Days Prior To Beacon**

 

affableAnnihilation (AA) opened relay with gorgeousInferno (GI)

  
GI: no

AA: oh come on i havent even said anything yet

GI: right but youre about to ask me to like, rob a bank or something

GI: tell me im wrong and ill tell you youre a liar

AA: thats silly if we tried to rob a bank wed get caught

AA: i was just wondering if you were free tonight

AA: see i was going to hang out with nepeta today to talk about murder

GI: yeah that sounds like you

AA: but she canceled on me to go work on her weapons

AA: so i thought maybe id go try to make some money

GI: i literally just said i wont help you rob a bank

AA: i said it wasnt that

AA: so theres this weird pattern im noticing

AA: if i hang out in more affluent human residential sectors everybody looks at me like im a criminal right

GI: to be fair you are actually specifically a criminal

GI: not that im judging you for that

AA: but if im in less affluent human residential sectors then im the one whos a target

AA: also hey im not a criminal for life its more like a hobby

AA: somebody from the midnight crew tried to recruit me and i stole his wallet

AA: so im totally on the up and up

GI: where are you going with this because i was just about to leave home and i cant type and ride a motorcycle at the same time

AA: okay okay the point is i got an idea from all of that

AA: i hide my weapons better

AA: wander around at night a lot

AA: and when some human inevitably tries to mug me i rob them instead

AA: its genius

GI: okay yeah thats kinda brilliant

GI: why are you telling me about it though, other than the usual bragging

AA: because if you wanted to back me up id be fine splitting the profits 70/30 :D

GI: dude im about to start going to, like, hero school

GI: this is not a good time to be breaking the law

AA: but is it breaking the law if they started it and you terrify them into silence

AA: or is it actually vigilante heroism in disguise

GI: dammit why do you have to make so much sense

GI: alright maybe but im busy tonight, when did you want to get together?

AA: aww i mean it doesnt have to be right away i have bullets to experiment with i suppose

AA: where are you going by the way

GI: hmm do you want the honest answer or a fake answer

AA: which one is more interesting

GI: promise you wont be pissed at me first

AA: why are you of all people worried about that

GI: because unlike you i dont love dying and being dead and youre a walking nightmare

AA: yeah thats true :D

AA: its pretty hard to make me mad and i promise i wont be

GI: i was going to hit up a couple information brokers to try to figure out where the hell you and your friends actually came from

GI: none of your explanations make sense and im really bored

AA: ooooh neat

AA: tell me if you find anything out id love to know

AA: but consider this option instead of chasing answers you wont find any time soon

AA: give me a ride to a terrible part of the city and spend a night on the town with your cool mystery friend trying to get ambushed by criminals for fun and profit

GI: thats a hard offer to turn down...

GI: if i get us in some place with my fake id and amazing chest will you pay for drinks?

AA: deal

GI: alright, im gonna take a shower then

GI: see you in an hour and a half

AA: yayyyy

AA: dont worry about it i need a while to wash some blood out of my hair before i go out anyway

GI: whose blood is it

AA: i have no idea

GI: sweet

AA: i know right

AA: drive safe :D

GI: never

 

gorgeousInferno (GI) closed relay with  affableAnnihilation (AA)

 

* * *

  **4 Days Prior To Beacon**

 

aggregateCarnivore (AC) opened relay with strayShinobi (SS)

 

AC: :33 > *pounces out from the shadows and gr33ts the stray cat enthuseastically!*

SS: hello, nepeta. i haven't heard from you in a few days. how are you doing? is your friend still helping you stay somewhere nice?

AC: :33 > i didnt mean to act distant or anyfin!

AC: :33 > aradias helping out she has a suspfishous amount of lien lately

AC: :33 > ive b33n a little busy trying to upgrade my claws but bassically im feline pretty good

AC: :33 > how aboat you?

SS: i've been fine. just trying to pass the time before the semester starts.

SS: mostly i'm doing volunteer work at the shelter.

SS: you'd think a city like vale would be half as progressive as it claims to be, but it's just more of the same neglect and mistreatment i've seen everywhere else.

AC: :33 > yeah i k33p noticing how tench the atmosphere is even in my friends neighpurrhood

AC: :33 > the hotel staff are ocray but i get hissed at in the str33t a lot

AC: :33 > everymoby is furry nervous about the white fang i guess!

SS: yeah. you'd think they would spend more time worrying about career criminals, but somehow it's the activists who get all the bad press.

SS: i don't condone most of what the fang has been doing around here, but no one can rationally deny that the midnight crew has been causing a lot more chaos.

AC: :33 > i heard 33:

AC: :33 > but only about half of them are faunus so appierantly theyre not a conchcern

AC: :33 > ugh i can s33 why youre so bristly about this stuff

AC: :33 > i want to scratch soooo many people up but im k33ping minnows as clean as i can

SS: i'm glad. sometimes it's not half as easy as it should be.

AC: :33 > hey blake

AC: :33 > if a furriend is r33ly upset and depressed but they dont want anyone to get involved

AC: :33 > whats the right thing to do?

AC: :33 > im trying not to care but its impawsible when i can tail shes practically alwaves aboat to cry

AC: :33 > its so awkward

SS: your friend whose girlfriend broke up with her?

AC: :33 > yeah 33:

SS: that's a hard situation to be in. i'm not sure, really. there's a thin line between involving yourself because it's your responsibility as a friend and crossing actual boundaries.

SS: she sounds even more prickly than you are about her emotions. no offense.

AC: :33 > none taken

AC: :33 > honestly she seariously n33ds to get cuttled

AC: :33 > but i dont know by who

SS: that's a weird way to put it, but yeah. that would probably help.

AC: :33 > umm, so

SS: yes?

AC: :33 > i manta say this a while ago but i kept pawting it off

SS: oh, god. should i be nervous right now?

AC: :33 > no no its nofin bad!

AC: :33 > i sort of just wanted to thank you

SS: ... thank me for what?

AC: :33 > whale a bunch of things really!

AC: :33 > i mean you helped me find a place to stay and get weapons and i catnt do that stuff myself

AC: :33 > at least not until i have the oar-perch-tuna-ty to get used to this city

SS: i think that's the worst thing you've said in a week.

AC: :33 > and i guess i screeched at you once or twice but youre very kind

AC: :33 > i barged into your life out of nowhere just floundering around like an idiot and you still bailed me out

AC: :33 > you even helped unlock my aura

SS: it wasn't anything special. you were in trouble and it just... seemed like the obvious thing to do.

SS: look, maybe from your perspective it seems selfless, but you've helped me too, without even noticing.

SS: i was... very lonely when i first came here. i wasn't sure if or when i was going to be able to befriend anyone, or even have anyone to talk to.

SS: so... i know we don't see eye to eye on everything, but you're still a good person, and i'm glad i met you.

AC: :33 > me too

AC: :33 > oh hey one of my fronds wants to come over to talk about murder

SS: that sure is a sentence.

AC: :33 > gotta go!

AC: :33 > good luck at the shellter :33

SS: thanks. take care of yourself.

AC: :33 > *the mighty huntress tries not to blush as she gives the black cat a big fuzzy hug befur scuttling back into the shadows!*

aggregateCarnivore closed relay with  strayShinobi!

 

* * *

  **Several Hours Prior To Beacon**

 

smoothCriminal (SC) connected to hub

__ (__) connected to hub

mercilessMessiah (MM) connected to hub

  


SC: Right on time, huh? Couldn't have given us just a couple of minutes of peace before all the bad-boy posturing?

__: (ง ˙o˙)ว

MM: Typical behavior. I show the magnanimity to lower myself to aid in your fight, and am I shown the slightest respect in turn? Even once? No.

MM: Not that I expect any different from your kind.

__: ¯\\_( ◉ ‿ ◉ )_/¯

MM: Incredible.

SC: You know, if you could keep the melodramatics on the down-low, I might just bother listening to what you have to say for once.

MM: We've been ordered to work with... one of the most effective and infuriating agents fighting for my cause. Though, to my shame as a fellow revolutionary, this particular girl prefers to be paid in more than simply righteousness.

__: （；¬＿¬)

SC: Tell me you're not talking about who I think you are, because you're crazy if you think I'm ever working with her again. I couldn't decide if surviving that job was actually worth having to listen to her for five minutes. Am I really going to have to break out the steel wool for my brain here?

MM: Do not remind me that there's even one opinion the two of us share.

__: （＞д＜）

MM: The three of us, then, fine.

MM: Yes. It's her. She was apparently hired on a more permanent basis just over a month ago, and no one found the time to let me know.

__: (◞‸◟；)

SC: Couldn't have put it better myself.

SC: You do realize she's probably just going to skewer me after what I said last time I met her,don't you? Survival is kind of my only reason for being part of this whole operation.

MM: And should you refuse, you'll be assassinated, or if you're unlucky you'll be dragged before Fall herself and burned alive in person.

SC: Wonderful.

__: ( #`⌂´)/┌┛

SC: I appreciate the sentiment, dear, but that shouldn't be necessary.

SC: ... I hope.

MM: For now, the objective is to endure a conversation with her while keeping your sanity.

SC: You're implying that's even possible.

MM: Do not antagonize me, human.

SC: Hey, you're the one who makes it easy.

 

aphelionsGambit (AG) connected to hub

 

AG: I've got one thing to say: seriously, Taurus? You, that chainsaw guy, AND 8oth of these nerds still can't hack it in Vale? Maaaaaaaan, sounds like you've got it rough down there. Luckily for you, your 8oss can actually make this worth my time.

MM: Are you incapable of being civil for a single, solitary message?

AG: Damn str8 I am. I'm not kidding, though, what's your damage? Things in Atlas are going smooth as silk for me, and somehow all four of you put together aren't enough to handle one kingdom?

AG: Don't get me wrong, you guys are pretty much gar8age, 8utI still don't 8uy it. Some8ody's 8een slacking off.

__:６( -_-)ｏ ○(-_- )ｏ

AG: 8ring it. I'll fight you IRL anytime. It might not even 8e 8oring.

SC: Ladies, please. If you could keep the flirting for later?

AG: What?! Who's flirting? I'm not flirting. Who'd flirt with that freak? O8viously not me. I've got 8etter things to do.

MM: ... Dear god. You actually were, weren't you?And with a human, too. Appalling.

AG: No I W8SN'T!!!!!!!! This jackass is j8st 8eing a jackass.

SC: See, you're not wrong about him in general, but now that you've said all of that I'm actually thinking he's right. This is hilarious.

__: /(;-_-)

AG: You are REALLY dedic8ed to that quirk, aren't you?

__: (و ˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و

SC: I'm just going to state, for the record, that if you so much as TOUCH her...

AG: Ooooooooh, the diamond has an opinion. What is it, tough guy? What happens if I so much as touch her?

__: （ノT＿T)ノ ＾┻━┻

SC: ... She's right, why is this even part of the conversation? What wrong did I do in a previous life to deserve this? I'll be the first to admit I'm not exactly a saint, but still.

AG: I think may8e you need to 8utt the hell out of this, rail or not.

MM: Do not force me to take a human's side in this, Serket.

SC: Are her nonsense words some kind of faunus thing I don't know about, or...

MM: NO.

AG: Keep talking like I'm not here and I won't even w8 until this jo8's done to kill you.

__: (ง ͠ ᵒ̌ Дᵒ̌)¤(---------

AG: >::::)

MM: Stop antagonizing the sociopath.

SC: Is anyone here *not* a sociopath? You're really asking for a lot from a lot of people, if you think about it from that angle.

AG: Okay, I'm 8ored. Like, really. Yaaaaaaaawn. Only one interesting thing even happened up here, so I'd 8etter not regret flying across continents for this crap. The assassin8ion wasn't even a challenge! I got more fight out of this other dude I didn't even recognize.

AG:Not sure what his deal was, honestly. He just kinda... showed up? Had a sword that reminds me of Taurus's, even had a weird mask. His was 8etter designed than this nerd's, though.

AG: The cops got there 8efore I could take him out, so I had to 8ail on him, 8ut damn, he really knew his stuff.

AG: I actually thought he was a couple different people, 8ut I'm pretty sure he just had a really 8izarre Sem8lance? Unless every8ody these days hangs out with a 8unch of clones who vanish into thin air when you sta8 them.

MM: Is she ever able to communicate without attempting to write a novel in the process?

SC: Not as far as I know. Hey, Blue, you did tell the boss about that, right? Because that's too weird to be a coincidence.

AG: Sh8t up, GOD!!!!!!!! Nah, kept it to myself. I didn't think it was worth the effort.

MM: Was it worth the effort to remember anything else about this man?

AG: Meh. He had a sword, pro8a8ly even a face. Lien a dozen, you know what I mean. Wore a lot of 8lue? Don't know, don't care. It honestly wasn't even worth recording.

MM:You can record almost anything at almost any time without anyone else noticing, and you mean to tell me you chose not to record THIS?

__: ლ(>_<ლ)

AG: 8ite me. I don't exactly have infin8 storage space anyway, idiot. What's more important, some guy we'll defin8ly never see again, or...

AG: Well, let's just say I found something waaaaaaaay more interesting than Random Sword Guy #8.

SC: I'd forgotten you could do that, and I sort of wish nobody reminded me.

AG: Anyway, I got my 8usiness taken care of and you gar8age people need a surrogate freaking lusus to get anything done, so I'm headed south.

AG: Miss 8ig Ego 8n't exactly happy, you know! 8etter shape up or she'll 8e sending me after YOU next.

SC: On that subject, I had sort of assumed the first thing you did here would be threatening to murder me, and I don't mean to tempt fate, but...

AG: W8, why?

SC: Because you held a sword to my throat after I criticized your business practices? And then specifically said "If I ever see you again, I'll kill you"?

AG: 8uddy, I 8arely even remem8er your name. Don't flatter yourself.

MM: Is there a single actual reason for us to continue speaking with you? We were already entirely aware that you're... joining us in Vale, and I assume you are already aware of these unexpected spikes in organized crime outside of our jurisdiction, so what actually was your purpose?

AG: Siiiiiiiigh. Just kill all the fun, why don't you. All I really had to say was this:

AG: GET YOUR FREAKING WORK IN ORDER SO I DON'T HAVE TO DO IT FOR YOU!!!!!!!!

AG: So, seeya soon, losers!

AG: ... and Neo. :::;)

 

aphelionsGambit (AG) disconnected from hub

 

SC: Have I ever mentioned that I hate my life?

MM: Have I ever mentioned that I hate my life?

SC: Jinx, you owe me a Cloak.

MM: The day I buy you a soda is the day I fall on my own sword.

 

mercilessMessiah (MM) disconnected from hub

 

SC: This is going to end badly for literally everyone, isn't it?

__: o(╥﹏╥)

SC: God help us all.

 

* * *

 

*** VOLUME 0 – end ***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been an incredible journey getting here to the end of volume 0, so ?I just gotta say, thank you so much to everyone reading this, whether you're new or a long-time follower.
> 
> See y'all in the next chapter, which will be taking place the very first day at the damn school, _finally._


	26. Unfamiliar Faces (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Check out the blog at http://lionheartedfic.tumblr.com if you haven't yet!)
> 
> Sorry for the delay, y'all. My bed was annihilated and my partner and I were sleeping on the floor for five days, and then some family drama managed to catch up to me from halfway across the damn country, but now I have a proper respite rectangle and some re-thickened skin so I should be back on track!
> 
> Anyway, here we go! The first non-prologue chapter. Only took me 75,000 words! Haha... ha... oh god what am I doing with my life

**\- volume 1. identity -**

"If you want to be a new man you have to stay in new places, and do new things, with people who never knew you before. If you go back to the same old ways, what can you be but the same old person?"

 _\- Joe Abercrom_ _b_ _ie,_ 'The Last Argument Of Kings'

* * *

R **W** BY

NJKA

* * *

  **Spring Semester, Day 1**

 

Disembarking at Beacon's helipad feels a bit like stepping into an entirely different universe.

The air has a strange quality to it, a heaviness that you suppose is humidity, and the temperature is shocking, at least in comparison to Atlas this time of year; naturally you knew there would be no _snow,_ but it's just... more like _Summer_ than Spring, in your opinion. Even the sunlight here feels different, _richer_ somehow, natural colors almost eerily vivid.

You knew that setting foot in another Kingdom for the first time would be strange, but you never quite realized just _how_ strange.

Butlers are already unloading your belongings, which seem slightly excessive now that you're looking at them on carts, and it occurs to you that once they've gone, it will be a very long time until you see another person in Father's employ. You should be happy, and maybe you are, but... even so, there's a lump in your throat you'd rather not acknowledge, a tension in your chest alongside that strange lightness that's followed you ever since you first boarded.

You've... actually made it. This is the day you've waited for, fought so long and so hard for, endured so _much_ for. A world without the duty to speak at company funerals, without harsh voices and absent-hearted mothers, without serving as someone else's pet songbird, without long nights alone with your own reflection. A world unfrozen.

There are so many other new students milling about, and not one of them would look at home anywhere near Atlas Academy. Not one of them gives you a second glance as you walk by. You may still be Weiss Schnee, and you _will_ demand the respect your name entails, but at the same time you're only one more face in a crowd.

Is this how it feels to be free?

It's a long walk across campus, taking in the sights, and you're not expecting to see a maddeningly familiar face pop out at you, but lo and behold, here she is anyway. _Really,_ universe? Was this _really necessary?_

At least you're not in a public restroom. Small mercies, you suppose.

She looks... different. For one thing, her clothes are _much_ more expensive, a slitted jade skirt just past her knees, elegant and annoyingly practical shoes to match, sleek and sleeveless black top with a squiggly green pattern sewn into the center of her torso, spaghetti straps clinging to finely muscled shoulders - and that's... ah. Yes.

You tear your eyes from the rather ugly scar on her left shoulder that she has apparently done nothing to hide, alight on a delicate silvery spiral-pendant, green-painted nails that almost look sharpned to claw-like points, her elegant but slightly bulky purse (odd little clasps at the bottom of the straps - is that her _weapon?)_

As usual, her presence seems to dim the world around her; there is nothing but your frustration and annoyance to focus on when she's in your line of sight. _Ugh._

She sees you, suddenly, takes a large breath and sighs. It's all but audible despite a distance of at least fifteen feet.

"I never thought I'd see a classless wretch at such a fine institution," you say, after closing the gap. Your stomach is oddly hot, presumably already building anger at whatever stupid and aggressive thing she'll have to say.

"You've stolen my line," she says, raising a thin eyebrow. One of those offensive bat ears twitches slightly.

Something feels _off._ You'd... thought she would _continue_ somehow. How exactly are you meant to respond to a statement that ends so abruptly?

"Have you perhaps gotten lost on the way to whatever cave you intended to roost in?"

"I think it's you who's been lost. Someone ought to let Jacques Schnee know he's misplaced one of his belongings."

... The world goes strangely red.

Why was it that you let this animal live, again?

You open your mouth, prepared to issue a more _serious_ challenge, hand flashing to your waist, and she - sighs again, shrugs.

"Just take your attitude elsewhere," Maryam says, oddly toothless, turns, and walks away. You're left standing here, infuriated, astonished, and baffled.

That's it, you realize; what was most different about her. Not her clothes or how much skin she was showing. It was her bearing. She didn't look ready to fight. No, she just looked _tired._ She hit you with perhaps her most brutal line yet, and there was hardly any passion behind it.

You're not sure what _you_ feel, apart from aimless and impotent anger. That was almost... _disappointing._ Now who are you permitted to tear to shreds? You can't very well _chase after her_ to continue trading barbs. You're not even sure why you _want_ to.

"Your Dust and toiletries, Miss Schnee?"

_"Aah!"_

Oh. It's just... a servant. Yes. Of course. You clear your throat, flushed with embarrassment, and yank away your bags.

What a _lovely_ start to the afternoon.

 

* * *

 

You don't make it _five minutes_ before the next... _incident._ You're hauling your luggage along - _why_ did you decide you'd carry your Dust yourself, again? You know perfectly well the odds of some abrupt terrorist action are minimal - and then a fresh, new idiot slams directly into you, knocking your bags to the ground.

For just a moment, your heart all but stops. You're almost surprised that nothing explodes, starting an elemental chain reaction that kills you instantly.

_"What are you doing?!"_

"Uh, sorry," she mumbles. A little girl in red; appropriate, since she's clearly a walking hazard. First the Faunus, now this. You've barely arrived here and you're already stressed enough that you feel right at home.

"Sorry? Do you have _any idea_ how much damage you could have caused?"

"Uhhh..." she says, the very picture of eloquence, picking up one of your bags. You snatch it out of her hands.

"Give me _that,"_ you snap. Gods forbid she touches the thing any longer and detonates the plaza after all. When you unlatch the thing to look inside, you're almost relieved that nothing's cracked. You don't really have the energy for _relief,_ however. "This is Dust. Mined and purified from the _Schnee Quarry._ _"_

It's not some cheap trash mined by incompetents or cut with other minerals; this is as pure as energy can get in solid form and twice as likely to be set off as a result. Of course, she just goes on mumbling.

"What are you, _brain dead?!_ _Dust!_ Fire, water, lightning, _energy_ _?"_ Three ways to die right there, and that's not even all of what you were carrying. Charred until your bones go black, crushed by rapidly expanding liquid like it was concrete, shocked into cardiac arrhythmia. "Are you listening to me? Is _any_ of this sinking in? _What do you have to say for yourself?!"_

You can't help but shake your fist in her baffled face. Clearly no one's bothered to _educate_ this cretin on the dangers of handling volatile materials, and if _you_ don't do it she'll just end up killing the _next_ person stupid enough to be in her vicinity.

Then she sneezes and the cloud of Dust particles you hadn't realized you were spreading into the air explode in your faces. Flames singe your sleeves, static sizzles against your aura.

If you hadn't set the rest of the bag on the floor, you _would_ be dead right now.

"... _Unbelievable._ This is _exactly_ the kind of thing I was talking about!"

"I'm really, _really sorry -"_

No. That's more than enough of this. You are well past the point of rationality. _Everyone_ is crossing you today, and _someone_ has to pay for it.

You raise your arm, ready to backhand this fool across her pathetic, sniveling face, take a moment to appreciate how _satisfying_ this is going to feel, and... and there is a series of small metallic clicks from behind you as something cold, hard, and uncomfortably barrel-like presses against your back.

... Your arm slowly comes down and the weapon moves away. The girl in red is staring in an obscene mixture of awe and horror. You turn to see another girl holding some sort of heavy rifle, no longer pointed at your actual human body. Large white ears are high in the air, her eyes are strangely focused and empty at the same time, a weird grin on her face showing teeth. All you can think of is the guard dogs back at the estate, ready to tear someone's throat out for threatening their territory.

"You maybe don't want to hit my friends! I kind of have a problem with that," she says cheerfully. She _should_ be putting her weapon away and apologizing in the hopes that you won't call the police, but she is definitely doing neither of those things. Your hand drifts slowly toward your blade.

"... Are you _kidding_ me? Your _friend_ could have gotten me killed!"

"My friend didn't know your bags were full of Dust, because she isn't psychic."

"None of this would have been a _problem_ if she didn't ram into me like a _wild animal!"_

The girl with the gun raises an eyebrow, and it occurs to you that you might have chosen your words a bit hastily. There's a moment of silence. The wind picks up, fluttering her narrow black dress and the long hood draped behind. It's almost theatrical; not quite a Vacuan stand-off but not all that far from it, either.

But the moment is broken by yet another person getting involved. Ugh, another one who has a fetish for _black,_ too. What is wrong with people's fashion sense these days? At least this one isn't another _Faunus;_ there's a moment when you think she is, before you realize she's just wearing a bow. Maybe someone will finally be on _your_ side.

"Let's all calm down, okay? Nobody wants a fight." You're about to open your mouth to argue, but she cuts you off. "I think we're all a little stressed. It's the first day of school, everyone's in a hurry."

Something about her expression is stressing you out further, actually. Ah, that's it! She's recognized you, that's all. _Finally_ someone who'll know to be respectful.

"I don't think the heiress to the Schnee Dust Company wants a black mark on her record on the first day of school. That could reflect pretty badly on the family."

_... Or maybe not._

You want to pick a fight so, _so_ very badly, but the maddening thing is that she's absolutely right. This would be a magnificently stupid way to provoke Father into pulling you back to hell, and even if that might happen someday, you won't let it happen _instantly._

"I'm really sorry," the first girl mumbles again, as if you care. "I wasn't trying to hurt anyone or cause any trouble."

"Then perhaps you should learn to _watch where you're going_ ," you say, and excuse yourself before anyone decides to draw on you again.

Once you've gotten out of sight, you find a bench and sit to try to collect yourself. Your hands are shaking, and you can't get them to stop.

Is this your life now? Harried, assaulted, and threatened at every step? You're all but expecting a stray aircraft to crash on your head at this point. _Two_ Faunus determined to prove the savagery of their species, _one_ destructive half-wit, and one smugly manipulative interloper just to top it all off.

... Maybe you should have stayed home. Maybe this _was_ a bad idea. You have no idea how to navigate a world full of _organisms_ like this. How pathetic, that you couldn't even make it into the building without multiple encounters that nearly came to blows. Do you really have what it takes to keep your own life in line without someone else shepherding every move you make? Why did you think everything would work out fine if you could just escape?

This might be a warmer Kingdom, but nothing has really changed, not when it comes to the basic facts of life. If you want to survive, you have to stay cold. No bursts of anger, no foolish imaginings that things will just get easier, no quarter given to obstacles in your path. Those are the only rules you can live by.

You won't forget them again.

 

* * *

RW **B** Y

NJKA

* * *

 

"... What were you thinking, pulling a _gun_ on another student? Especially _her,_ of all people!"

The girl in black and green stares at you for a couple of seconds as if she has no idea what you're talking about, blinks, and suddenly looks... not exactly horrified, but definitely upset, collapsing her rifle immediately.

"I - I wasn't thinking," she says. "She was going to hit her, and I just saw red, I guess. I don't really feel... _bad_ about it, but... God, that was stupid, wasn't it?"

The 'her' in question turns from staring out into the crowd and back to her extremely protective friend. Or, hmm. Is it _just_ a 'friend' thing? Red's cheeks are a little bit pink and she's looking at Green like she's some kind of hero. You probably wouldn't have thought about other possibilities, except with the recent break-up in Nepeta's tiny social circle you're sort of... remembering that kind of thing actually happens.

It's weird how far you pushed that idea out of your mind, and you don't really want to dwell on the reason why.

"It was a little bit stupid," you say. It was actually incredibly stupid, but rubbing that in seems pointlessly mean. She obviously _does_ know what she did wrong. Most of what pushed it into _incredibly stupid_ territory had to do with the target. "You do know who that was, right?"

"Um, well, you said she's the heiress to the Schnee Dust Company, so now I know that much! Should I have?"

"I didn't know she was famous, either," Red says.

Huh. There aren't too many Faunus who don't know way too much about the SDC, but after meeting Nepeta you've learned a lot about just how surprising people can be.

"Well, I'm glad I could help." ... This is awkward. You've only made one friend in recent memory, you still have no idea how to talk to anyone outside of high-stakes situations. You're about to turn away to leave, but... you end up hesitating, just a little bit.

It's not _safe_ to try to make friends, meet people. Wanting to in the first place is so unlike you. (Is it, though, or is it just habit?) It would be great to not only know one Faunus at the school, but _two_ , and you could probably trust her to keep your own species a secret. You _shouldn't_ try to trust anyone like that, but...

"I'm Jade," she says, smiling kind of painfully earnestly, "Jade Harley!"

"My name's Ruby Rose!"

... You guess that's your mind made up for you, then.

"Blake Belladonna," you say, and there's a weird thrill of fear at that, trying to make new connections, but it's kind of nice, too. "It's nice to meet you, Ruby, Jade. I think we'd better get going, though, or we'll be late to orientation."

"Oh no! We have to find Yang! Catch up with you later!"

Ruby vanishes into a swirl of rose petals, which is... new. Some people have the strangest Semblances... wait, did she say... you think you _know_ that name.

"Wait! Do you mean Yang Xiao Long? Er, sorry, that's... not very likely."

Jade's eyebrows shoot up.

"Yeah, that's her sister. Why, do you know her?"

You're not sure how to explain that your friend has a friend who's friends with her sister, and that everyone in that chain of people is weird and ostentatious enough that you know them by name after just a couple of weeks, without having _met_ two of them, or at least you don't know how to explain it quickly.

"I don't know her, exactly? It's complicated. Small world, I suppose."

Jade shrugs and smiles again.

"I feel that way all the time."

 

* * *

 

It's so strange arriving at the school auditorium with someone to actually _meet._ Maybe it was unrealistic of you to think that you'd never have friends again after leaving the White Fang, but even so, it's how you felt. The world was always hostile, but somehow it became so much more so after Adam became a rising star and you became his shadow. Even after you split from your family, it wasn't always so _dark._ Not even Ilia had that effect on you. She had hope once, too.

You saw a planet that was broken and twisted, but it was a planet full of _people_ ; minds that could be swayed, cultures that could adapt. Adam... disagreed, and it took you way too long to notice that, and even longer to notice you were starting to agree too. You were just so _tired_ after years of barely seeing the impact of your actions.

Now the only impact is that you don't see anything _but_ what needs to be changed. You see a world where you _need_ to be a shadow or else you'll be crushed, where everyone is a liar until proven otherwise.

You _were_ naive when you were young. That's true, no matter what. But maybe you wish you could have stayed naive if the alternative was becoming so cynical.

"... aaaake!"

Your head snaps up from the floor, and through a crowd that might as well just be the silhouettes of uncomitted crimes, there's a friendly face, waving her arm hard enough that you're surprised her bracers don't engage.

She looks a little better than she used to: better fed, definitely. Maybe not so much better clothed - wearing less _ratty_ clothes, but her outfit isn't much more sophisticated. Then again, maybe that's just how she likes it. Not every Huntress has to be striving to look like the embodiment of individuality, _all the time._ Her attitude shouldn't be that weird.

Mostly she's spent her time and money on new bracers. You're not tidally - _totally_ sure what's special about these apart from the quality of the metal, but she's been implying there's some kind of interesting feature she wants to keep a surprise.

"Get ofur here! The school humans are aboat to start talking."

... You've gotten used to a few things about Nepeta Leijon, but her uncomfortable way of talking about other people, especially humans, always throws you for a loop.

"Where are your friends? I thought you were meeting them here."

She rolls her eyes.

"Aradia's off causing troububble somewhere, like usual. I'll catch up to them later."

The room goes quiet in response to the screech of a microphone being adjusted (you try not to wince), and you turn your head away from Nepeta and her flicking tail to the podium, where the headmaster's fiddling with the equipment. He looks out across the room, looking almost unexpectedly serious.

"I'll... keep this brief," he says, and you remember the surprising warmth from him when you first met him. It's hard not to think of it, when you're hearing its complete absence. "You have traveled here today in search of knowledge, to hone your craft and acquire new skills, and when you have finished you plan to dedicate your life to the protection of the people. But I look amongst you, and all I see is _wasted energy,_ in need of purpose, direction."

Okay, that's a really uncomfortable sentiment. He's... probably right, though, and maybe that's why it feels this way. All _you_ are is wasted energy, at least, and while you wouldn't use such harsh language about Nepeta, she's probably the same thing. Neither of you really know what to do with yourselves. You're here because you can't think of anything better.

"You assume knowledge will free you of this, but your time at this school will prove that knowledge can only carry you so far." Yeah, there are probably some people in this crowd who'll need to hear that. You, though? you know it all too well.

"It is up to you to take the first step."

And then he just... leaves. That might have been the least motivating speech someone could possibly give to a bunch of teenagers without being cruel. This guy obviously had hidden depths, who doesn't, but still. You make a mental note to watch yourself around him even more than you already would have.

Professor Goodwitch, who you remember seeing in hologram form on the flight here, steps up in his place.

"You will gather in the ballroom tonight; tomorrow, your initiation begins. _Be ready._ You are dismissed."

You wonder how many takes she had to record to fake that gentle, motherly tone you had kind of expected her to hold on to. Wow.

And then she's gone, too, and the room descends into whispers.

"Whale, that was interesting! He didn't even execute anybody for being late. This school is purrty gentle, isn't it?"

"Riiiight," you manage. She is not being at all sarcastic, is she?

Well, this is it. It's a little bit of a relief, now that you're processing it, to see that Beacon Academy isn't still trying to hide its sharper edges. You're okay with an institution being reasonably strict. If they'd been saccharine much longer, _that_ probably would have been a much worse sign.

Whatever happens, however unlike your expectations this could be, it's better than going back. Anything is better than going back. Dying would be better, because at least you'd get to die as the person you really are, whoever that is.

You don't intend to run from anything anymore. The only direction you'll let yourself move is forward.


	27. Unfamiliar Faces (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com !!

_here's to all the words we'll never speak_

_here's to all the pretty girls you're gonna meet_

_here's to the little lies i tell in my sleep_

_here's to the secrets that you're gonna keep_

 

[rilo kiley - draggin' around](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrf1r3ARIJg)

 

* * *

RW **B** Y

NJKA

* * *

  **1st Night, Spring Semester**

 

  
The last rays of afternoon sun are vanishing, and students everywhere are filling up the ballroom floor with their luggage and their bodies. You feel so strange to be a part of the crowd like this; to have a solid reason to be lumped in with a group of both humans and Faunus (mostly humans, but still). Whatever else you are, you're a student now, and that puts you on... well, probably not _even_ footing, but a lot closer to it than ever before.

It's a little bit scary, but there's also an old comfort to this ritual. Everyone is clustered so close together, busy and excited, without any walls to divide them. It's a thoroughly communal space, and it sort of reminds you of home, in that there are a lot of people living in one big group, all of them sharing something.

You could have been so alone here, part of the crowd but still singled out, except... you don't actually have to be. It's a big change from the way you're used to living, that's for sure.

"Are you sure you want to keep those bracers on while you sleep? That can't be comfortable, can it?"

Nepeta shakes her head, flicks her tail. You wonder if she actually wants her strange forest animal paranoia to be validated, just for the chance to fight someone, and that's not a good feeling, but at the same time, there's purity to it. She isn't spiteful, isn't a sadist; she just... loves to fight. You don't really understand that, but you can imagine it as a personality trait that doesn't make someone terrible.

"Everybody's crammed in here like sardines. I'm quaying ready beclaws I swear there's gonna be at least one murder befur morning."

You smile, which is such an odd reaction, or it would be if you didn't know her as well as you think you do. Her assumptions about people are so grim, but they lack even a hint of judgment. She just... thinks she's living in the jungle, you guess.

It's so weird not to be afraid of the person sitting next to, especially when that person is important to you.

"I think it'll be okay. Are you sure you want our sleeping bags in the same place? I know it usually makes you uncomfortable to be that close to anybody."

"Oh! No, it's fin! Reely, I'm purrfectly fine, don't furry about it!"

Is she blushing?

"Okay. I'll trust you on that. If you change your mind, I won't be upset, okay?"

Alright, now she's _definitely_ blushing. It's strangely adorable how flustered she gets when somebody bothers caring about her, even if that's heartbreaking to think about on a deeper level. You still don't understand the culture she apparently comes from, but it seems terribly lonely, and it's hard to believe her when she says it wasn't a damaging way to live.

"Ocray... um. Are you..." she fidgets with her sleeves, "Um, are you going to be alright around all these humans? It's purrty crowded."

"Yeah. I'll be okay. Thank you for asking, though."

"Shore," she mumbles, at a volume that you're pretty sure wouldn't be audible to a human. "Any time."

It's nice, seeing her actually able to accept kindness once in a while, even if she finds it incredibly awkward. Well, you're the only person she'll tolerate it from in more than miniscule doses, but still. You had been afraid that getting her to loosen up wasn't possible _at all_ just a couple of weeks ago. Any progress is good, right?

"Bluhh, they're all so _loud._ Humans mako soooo much noise."

"Nothing to be done about it," you say. It's probably worse for you than her; Nepeta's senses are a lot better than a human's, but still a lot weaker than yours are, especially her hearing. Hmm, actually, your bow muffles things a little bit, so maybe you're about even right now.

Mostly, all you can think is that this is so _peaceful._ Yes, it's noisy and the bustle makes you nervous, but you're not alone. You're with someone you trust, who can hold her own in a fight. Someone who doesn't want to _own_ you.

God, you hope your life doesn't stop feeling like this.

"Hell- _lo_ ~!" There's a girl you don't recognize walking over, with the two from earlier in tow... Ruby and Jade, you think? "I think you three might know each other?"

"Four, actually!", Jade says. "How are you guys doing? I haven't seen you in a while, Nepeta!" She looks both anxious and happy at the same time, and doesn't seem to know exactly where to look. Not used to groups, you suppose. You should be more surprised that those two know each other, but... someone who draws their rifle on a stranger in a school courtyard _does_ fit right in.

"I'm purrty good," Nepeta says.

"Fine, thank you. It's a nice night. Are you doing okay? You sort of detonated a cloud of dust and then nearly got slapped."

"Oh my god, you really exploded," the blonde says. "Yo, did Jade seriously pull a gun on that girl?" You nod and she claps her on the back, beaming. _"Nice._ Didn't think you had it in you."

"... Me either," Jade says quietly.

"Anyway, I'm Yang. Yang Xiao Long. You've met my sister, I guess, plus this nerd here, our friend from a confusing and incredibly unlikely distant land." Oh, so this is her. She looks... almost nothing like you'd expected. Pajamas and long hair don't really go along well with your mental image of some kind of danger-loving biker queen.

"Blake Belladonna."

"Nepeta Leijon! Hey, where's A-ray-dia?"

"Oh, she went off to go explore the school grounds in the dark. She's hoping she can find some ghosts to chat up, you know how she is. I was gonna go with her but... I wanted to check on some things." She shoots a quick glance in Jade's direction. What's the story there? There's some complicated thing going on between these people, but you can't make out the shape of it, yet.

"Um, do you mind if we hang out for a while?" Ruby looks even more nervous than Jade does; you'd hardly noticed her, in fact. "I'm okay, by the way! Since you asked!"

You look to Nepeta; you're willing to give it a try, but you don't want her feeling too hemmed in. That seems like a recipe for sudden violence. It's up to her, though; you're not going to assume you know better if she disagrees.

She actually does nod after all, and suddenly you're one of five people in a loose ring, feeling something warm and sweet, something you had basically forgotten about entirely. Your best friend, for her part, looks happier than you've ever seen her.

Obviously she feels the same way.

"I almost hate to ask, but I can't help but be curious after hearing so many strange things about her, but... what does Aradia - am I saying that right? - actually _do?_ "

Yang looks away, conspicuously, scratching the back of her neck. Jade rolls her eyes, turns to you. Her ears tilt just barely back.

"I _think_ you're saying it right. Well, she doesn't have whatever job she must have had in Vacuo, so um... lately she's baiting random people into trying to rob her on the street and then taking their money, because I guess that's just how she does things! She mostly goes after people who um, well. Have a problem with Faunus, I guess." Jade shrugs.

You're not sure how to feel about Aradia, but at least she's keeping things on a personal level? Anything's better than how you used to live.

"I... really shouldn't condone that, but it _is_ clever. She doesn't... hurt anyone, does she?"

"Um. Not _seriously?_ " She fidgets with the hem of her dress. You try not to sigh.

"Is everyone from your homeland this violent?"

"Oh, um! Actually, I'm from a _different_ place you've never heard of. Nepeta, Aradia, and Kanaya are all from the same... well..." She trails off.

"Yeah, Jade's bassically from another planet."

You frown.

"That's kind of rude, isn't it?"

"Not reely! As fur as I'm conchcerned, it's the truth."

"Honestly, she's not wrong," Jade says.

Where _are_ these people all coming from? Maybe someday you'll get a straight answer.

"So then what's your story, Blake? You seem like the quiet type. Work at a book store of something?" Yang cracks her back, fluffs out her hair. That enormous mane has to be a nightmare to take care of, but it's starting to make more sense for her personality the longer you look at her.

"Not... really. I have enough lien from my, er, last job, so I've mostly been volunteering at a shelter for homeless Faunus downtown. Things aren't amazing there, but I do what I can. It's not much, but... any contribution is better than nothing, isn't it?"

Ruby and Jade are both staring at you, wide-eyed.

"Oh my gosh you are like some kind of saint?" You're not sure how this is impressive enough to be worthy of _that_. Ruby seems to be very... excitable, but good-natured. It's cute; you can see why Jade obviously likes her so much.

"Yeah, I'd be too nervous to work with strangers like that, honestly," Jade says. "I wonder if I would have ended up there eventually if I hadn't met Ruby."

"Oh? What happened there?"

"We've just been letting her crash at our place," Yang says, as if that's nothing. "It's not like extra food cost us much, and she somehow got a job freakin' instantly anyway."

You feel... weird about that. It should be great, and you _shouldn't_ feel weird about it, but you can't help but wonder if they just saw her as some kind of charity case, even if there's a more natural attachment now.

That's not a very kind assumption, though. They seem nice enough. And if _Nepeta_ doesn't think it's too weird, then it must not be anything patronizing. Right?

"Besides, people are so rude all the time?" Ruby leans in, guilt in her bright silver eyes. "I barely even noticed before Jade moved in but oh my god we can be really awful can't we? Humans, I mean. She keeps getting mistaken for being a gang member pretty much just because, well. You know. It would be even worse if she didn't have somewhere safe to stay."

"I probably wear too much black," Jade says, ears flopped back even farther. "I'm not sure if people thinking I'm in the Crew is better or worse than assuming I'm a terrorist, though."

 _"Bluhhhh,"_ Nepeta bluhs. "This whale city thinks it's prey being threatened by somefin that barely exists. As if the humans actshoally _are_ outnumbered, even though there are like, five of them for efurry one of us. Like, shore, I guess there has been a lot of gang stuff, but it's not even logical to just purrtend it's all just _saaaavage scary Faunus_ being clawful when half the Midnight Crew are humans. Unbereefable."

"Dude," Yang says. "Okay. I feel you. But I gotta ask a really important question."

Nepeta nods, a bit apprehensive.

"Am I crazy or are you like, constantly talking in _puns?"_

"Oh! Yeah, bassically efurry day."

"Is she serious? Is that actual?"

"Yes," you say grimly. "Yes, it is."

"Oh, we are gonna get along _swimmingly."_

Ruby groans. You don't, but you die a little inside, all the same. There are _two of them_ now. You're stuck with _two of them._ Even if it ends up just being for one night, will you _survive?_

 

* * *

 

The conversation goes on, around and around, almost dizzying, and time flies by. You're actually having a good time, and if you weren't so happy about it you'd be scared there's another shoe waiting to drop.

Okay, you _are_ scared of that, but... Everyone here seems so nice. Ruby and Yang haven't said one gross thing as far as you can tell, and there are two other Faunus here, which is always a comfort. When you spend so much time on edge and surrounded by people who'll hate you for your species more often than not, you learn to value any security you can find.

So far you're still not letting your own status slip, and Jade hasn't said anything to give you away. She can definitely smell that you're not human, but Nepeta took a moment to whisper in her ear about it and she just nodded, didn't even make a big deal out of it.

You're going to have to thank them both for that later, when you can do it without bringing any attention to the reason why.

Is it stupid of you to care so much? The sisters really do appear to be safe, so... maybe you'll actually tell _them,_ someday, if you end up real friends and you can work up the nerve. As for the rest of the student body, though, you're just not willing to tempt fate. Trying to pass is tiring and nerve-wracking, but right now it's better than just becoming another animal.

... Ilia would be ashamed of you, wouldn't she?

Suddenly you feel a bit sick.

Then Yang makes a truly disastrous pun about salmon farming. Nepeta all but chokes laughing. Meanwhile Ruby and Jade are lost in their own little firearms enthusiast world. It's precious, and how are you supposed to feel down with that going on just a few feet away?

Please, God or Gods, if you're out there... let this last. Let your life be something that gives you the chance to forget the places you've been and the things you've done. Just this once, let you stay _happy._

"... hey, _there_ she is. _Kanaya!_ Over here!"

Your head snaps up. Jade is waving to someone through the crowd. For a few seconds you think she's misidentified someone or maybe just getting ignored, and then an incredibly elegant girl with bat ears makes her way over to your group.

"I see you've made some new friends?" The new arrival smiles, but she doesn't actually seem happy. You know that look: someone who's trying to put on a good face when she's actually feeling beaten into the dirt. It's uncomfortably familiar.

This is the one who was just dumped, unless you're remembering her ambiguously foreign name wrong. Nepeta's brought it up several times; as far as you know, she's been a mess ever since. You can't really blame her, especially when it was a pretty long term relationship.

"Yeah, totally! Do you want to hang out with is?"

"I..." Kanaya hesitates, a tiny fang digging into her lip. "Is there... room?"

"We can make room for one more pretty lady," Yang says, winks.

"Tidally!" Nepeta is already shuffling over to save a few more inches. Shuffling toward _you_ , actually. Her shoulder is almost brushing up against yours at this point, but yeah, if everyone squeezes you should still be able to expand the circle. There are a lot of people around, but your own friend-cluster has a little bit of a buffer around it. You don't want to say it's because three of you are Faunus, but... yeah.

"Well, I suppose I could spare some time before I sleep," Kanaya says. She scratches awkwardly at a large, fresh-looking scar on her shoulder, the only thing about her that wouldn't belong at a dinner party for the extremely affluent. "I need to tidy up a bit first, so I'm heading to the ablution block, but I'll be back in a few minutes?"

"Yeah!" Four people say in unison. You nod.

She smiles at all of you again, but it's weak, forced, and once she's left, it's clear that you aren't the only person who noticed.

"I feel really bad for her," Jade says quietly. "I've tried to talk to her about it, but I can't really get through anymore. Maybe she's mad at me."

 _"_ _What?!_ Why would she be mad at you?" Ruby looks devastated by the idea that anyone could be mad at Jade, which lines up pretty well with her behavior toward her so far.

"Some stuff happened, a while back - before the thing with Rose. And I got sort of... pushy, I guess. I was frustrated that she wouldn't open up even though she kept dropping hints about being upset, and I kind of forced her to talk about some stuff, so... I don't know. She didn't say anything about being angry, and I think I probably did the right thing in the moment, but I'm worried that she's not going to trust me anymore."

She looks really downcast, and then lets out a loud startled squeak, because Ruby's lunged over to hug her.

"She's probably not mad! And even if she is I'm sure she'll forgive you! Don't beat yourself up over it. You wanted to help, right? Isn't that what friends do?"

"... Yeah," Jade says. "Maybe you're right."

You guess that everyone has their problems.

It's tough trying to help a person who isn't interested in your assistance; you'd know that better than anyone. Nepeta's been poking at you for weeks and she hasn't gotten very far. There's a lot you just don't want to talk about, now and possibly ever.

You doubt Kanaya's girlfriend was anything like your own ex, but there's nothing like losing the deepest trust in her life to make an introvert lock herself away in her own mind and throw away the key.

The sad truth is, doors like that don't _want_ to be opened again.

 

* * *

R **W** BY

NJKA

* * *

 

The night is rapidly deepening, and every single person in this ballroom but you is convinced they're at some sort of impromptu sleepover. Bags and pillows are scattered like trash, no rhyme or reason to any of it; a hundred voices echo, overlapping and chattering about anything and everything.

It's irritating, distracting, pointless. Clusters of nervous teens have formed from loners and future outcasts who are evidently too frightened of independence to spend a single night without making nuisances of themselves, and pre-formed groups of friends huddle together, bellowing nonsense and empty boasts and inside jokes.

What an absolute mess.

You've taken what luggage of yours is relevant and staked out a spot along one wall, marking its borders with your bags; no one can reasonably intrude on your space without being entirely aware that they are indeed _intruders._ Any minute now you're sure some fool will blunder by to knock over your belongings, or some two-faced boy will strike up an inane conversation with dreams of one day getting under your skirt, or someone will want to lay the groundwork for stupid social politics by attempting to pack-bond with the richer girl. When they do, you'll be sure to have some harsh words prepared.

Hopefully you'll be assigned a dormitory soon. You don't think you'll be able to stand another night of this madness. Is this what the first night at any Academy is like? Atlas _must_ be more orderly than this, not that you actually regret steering clear of your sister's old proving grounds. Haven seems the sort of place to cultivate at least a shred of dignity. Shade... hmm. Well, alright, whatever happens at Shade is probably much worse.

Since earlier this afternoon you've been half-expecting to run into your chainsaw-wielding shadow or some other person eager to draw their weapon on another actual person, but it hasn't happened yet. Small mercies, you suppose.

... Though, at least that might make things a bit less _boring._

You should've brought books, probably; you could be refreshing yourself on late-course material in any number of subjects to keep sharp for your upcoming classes. That would pass the time quite a bit more efficiently than just sitting here observing all of the reasons why you should be glad you've never bothered trying to 'make friends' with the rabble.

Ugh. The noise is so _constant._ When will these idiot children finally calm down and let you get some peace and quiet? You could be half-asleep already if you not for this _commotion,_ and the volume is laced too thickly with random spikes to let it properly fade into white noise. It feels as though you're just barely out of reach of fifty other worlds, never quite able to grasp any one of them long enough to make sense of it. Not that you _want_ to.

Maybe you should go... brush your teeth again, or something, or maybe just double-check that nothing untoward's happening to your face in the mirror. Anything to give you a reason to be somewhere that isn't here, even if only for five precious minutes.

Traversing the madness, you're continually surprised that no one accosts you in any fashion. Are you just becoming paranoid lately? This does make more sense; it _shouldn't_ be typical for you to be drowning in unfortunate acquaintances and random sycophants.

... Good. That's good. Isn't it?

The restroom is oddly quiet, mostly due to the fact that there are actually several of them for each gender (and one or two unisex instances, though you're not entirely sure what the point of those even is). Does the school _want_ its students committing lewd acts whenever this place is actually used to throw a party? It's baffling.

Around a marble wall, though, there _is_ sound: a voice. Just _one_ voice, strangely. You don't mean to be voyeuristic, but you'd rather not walk in on a psychopath, so you take a moment to, er, _survey_ the area ahead. With your ears.

"... am I doing the right thing?"

You freeze, or at least freeze _more_. This is absolutely and positively a real curse and you don't know what dark forces you agitated to bring it upon yourself. Nothing logical can explain why this girl is _always using the restroom at the same time as you._ Destiny simply wants you to suffer.

She sounds _off_ , though. There's a moment when you don't quite get it, before she begins to sniffle and your stomach twists. Ah. Your adversary is sequestered away in a school restroom, crying like a child. It's absolutely pathetic in a new and vastly more upsetting way than her usual undignified flailing. The only word you can think of to describe this is _ugly_. This is not something you wanted to hear. You should go.

"When will I have stared at my reflection long enough to stop seeing someone else?"

You feel as though you've been struck with something, but it's difficult to know _what._

...

That noise is all around you again, very suddenly: chaos, shuffling, unruly voices. Wait, what... where... oh. You're... back at your sleeping bag.

You aren't sure how that happened. The walk you must have taken is utterly absent from memory; it's as though one moment you were standing just inside the restroom and the next you were here, although _here_ is a very relative term that means something like 'a space _partially_ but not _entirely_ outside of the known universe.'

After staring off into the middle distance and studying the moonlight's bright lines cut across the floor for a minute or two, you shake your head and curl up on top of your sleeping bag, leaning hard into your pillow. You think that maybe you're trembling, just a little bit.

... It's chilly tonight, isn't it?

You hadn't really noticed that before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man this chapter is busy


	28. Unfamiliar Faces (3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com !!!!)
> 
> Kind of a breather chapter here.

_measure me in metered lines, in one decisive stare_

_the time it takes to get from here to there_

_my ribs that show through t-shirts and these shoes i got for free_

_i'm unconsoled, i'm lonely, i am so much better than i used to be_

 

[ _the weakerthans - aside_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zqngbGz_nrE)

 

* * *

 JN **P** R

* * *

**1st Night, Spring Semester**

 

_"Uh, hi! I hope I'm not bothering you, but um, could I get your autograph?"_

_"Holy crap, is that Pyrrha Nikos? Like, THE Pyrrha Nikos?"_

_"I loved you in last year's Mistral Regional_ _s_ _! That last match_ _?_ _I mean, just, wow!"_

_"_ _Hey_ _,_ _isn't_ _she_ _the girl from all_ _those_ _cereal boxes_ _and stuff_ _?"_

_"Oh my God, am I seeing things or is Pyrrha freakin' Nikos going to_ _OUR SCHOOL_ _?"_

 

Well, you knew things could get a _little_ awkward here. You really shouldn't feel so surprised. Hmm, maybe that's the wrong word... you aren't so much surprised as you are disappointed. So much time spent convincing yourself that it wouldn't be too bad, so much energy spent tryring to believe Mother's reassurances; after all, every other person _there_ would be a warrior in training, you couldn't possibly stand out _too_ much.

At this point in your life, you really ought to stop underestimating your own reputation. If you can't escape the crowds even by seeking education in another Kingdom, then perhaps you should just... quit trying. It isn't _so_ bad, really, and very few of them mean any harm by it.

You do really, really need some fresh air, though, and no one said you _couldn't_ roam the grounds a bit after hours.

Beacon's campus is gorgeous and expansive, Vale's night air crisp and sweet. The moon is showing its unbroken face, lending an ethereal glow to foreign architecture and well-manicured grass, to marble walls and smooth stone paths. This would be a truly lovely sight even without the bustle and claustrophobia of the ballroom for contrast.

It's a bit strange to take in this place's atmosphere when you consider it in full context: that this is not an experience in tourism like your other visits to foreign lands have been. You're not here for a tournament or a promotion. This is your first night proper in what is, very suddenly, your new home.

You're used to there being at least _one_ person nearby who sees you as mostly human and not some kind of living icon. Even if Mother could be a little bit... _enthusiastic_ about your career, she never treated you as something outside the normal flow of the world. You won't have that luxury very often, anymore, so for now you'd better just... appreciate these moments of physical solitude.

It's just as you're thinking this that you round the corner of an unidentifiable school building and see a boy in... is that a breastplate over a hoodie and _jeans?_ Despite his _interesting_ fashion sense he's rather handsome in an oddly young and boyish way. He looks very confused and maybe even frightened, although you can't imagine anything legitimately scary around. When he sees you he immediately perks up. Your heart sinks, just a tiny bit.

"Oh man, am I ever glad to see _you._ You're... wait a second."

He eyes you suspiciously and you try not to sigh.

"You're _alive,_ right? Not like, some kind of weird ghost about to eat my soul or anything?"

... That's definitely not what you were expecting, and after you've taken a second to process the question, you shift gears from trying not to sigh to trying not to laugh.

"I'm very much alive," you say. "What... makes you think I wouldn't be?"

"Whoo," he says, letting out a breath that's half-held. "Great! Uh, well, it sounds kinda stupid now that I think about it, but I ran into another girl who... said she was dead?"

You raise a brow. He seems to be having trouble looking you in the eye.

"I know, I know, it's just, she was _really_ weird and intense, and I thought she was joking but she gave me this _smile_ and like, do people _have_ that many teeth? I don't think mouths are supposed to _work_ like that. And then she said she'd _see me in my dreams_ _to prove it_ and just wandered off, and the longer I stood out here alone thinking about it the weirder it got, and - uh, sorry, I'm rambling, aren't I?"

"Maybe a little bit." You're biting the inside of your lip trying to keep your cool, but it must be obvious that your smile is somewhat at his expense. "In any case, you're definitely safe _now_. What's -" ... you hesitate; do you actually want to bother asking? Is there a point? He's so disoriented by his alleged ghost encounter that he hasn't realized he's talking to a celebrity, but that'll change, so do you really even care?

... Ah well. Maybe you'll try, just this once.

"What's your name?"

"Oh! I'm Jaune. Jaune Arc. What's yours?"

He... is he serious? He _must_ know you. You're essentially Remnant's biggest rising star for young fighters, and you haven't met a single aspiring warrior of any kind who doesn't pay enough attention to their craft to recognize you. It's gotten to the point where it feels almost like a curse, like some depressing and inescapable fate.

"... Pyrrha Nikos," you say, trying to sound at least slightly cheerful. "It's nice to meet you, Jaune."

"You too! Um, you came from the ballroom, right? Do you know how to _get back there?_ I'm kinda _lost_ out here and there might be ghosts and I've gotta find my luggage and I'm rambling again, sorry about that, just kind of nervous, you know?"

... It's _possible_ he could have been living under a large rock? His earnest, embarrassed smile doesn't betray any kind of deception. If anything it's the opposite, innocent and kind of adorable. He carries himself like someone much smaller than he actually is, like a large dog with an anxiety disorder.

"Yes, I was just heading back, actually," you lie. "Would you... like to come along?"

Jaune lights up, shame instantly forgotten, and while you don't really want to admit it to yourself, so do you.

Maybe the ballroom doesn't have to feel so lonely after all.

 

* * *

NJK **A**

* * *

 

As soon as you fall asleep and pop up in the void, you start moving. You've got _two_ dreams you want to visit tonight, and one of them might be off in the middle of nowhere; you haven't visited her in weeks, not since that awkward but _very_ intriguing first time, but now that you've convinced a brand new person that you're a frightening spirit it's jogged your memory.

The first one is closer - should be _super_ close - and probably quicker, so you'll just get that out of the way.

Hmm, let's see, let's see... there are a lot of bubbles you recognize, not counting people you know from your continuum: one made of golden fire, one woven from dead tree branches dripping bright red human blood from their leaves, one that's just a solid black dome - that'd be your friends's new buddies, although you already know the first one _very_ well - but a bunch of other interesting ones, too. A bubble of water reflecting strange white-petaled flowers, a roiling thunderstorm, a cage with bars of bronze and gold, a wall of broken shields spilling out yellow light, a fortress door made from jagged ice spikes.

If you peek through a couple of these, you can probably see the dreamer inside. Hmm! You don't recognize the girl inside the cage; pretty, though. Maybe the shields? A-ha! Yessss! There you go. That's your poor, unsuspecting victim.

"Knock knock," you say, knocking. It takes him a minute to shake off whatever dream he was having, and then the largest shield, which also has a knob on it, slowly opens.

"... H-hello? _Oh my god."_

You give him your biggest grin, lean in as close as you can get without thumping your pan-case on the threshold.

"You didn't believe me, did you? Come on, be honest."

He looks about ready to wet his human pants. It's totally possible you're reshaping his entire view of the universe.

"I, I mean, I guess not?"

"That's a shame! I guess I'll just have to haunt you, huh?"

Stepping back, he raises his hands in front of his face, wiggling them around.

"N-no, hey, come on! Please don't haunt me, I've got enough problems!"

_"Hmm..._ nope! Too late for that. I'll be nice, though... as long as you remember one thing."

He nods, shaking slightly. This is just too much fun.

"When you run into me again, don't forget that _no one but you can see or hear me._ Bye!"

You skip off to your next destination while you still have time. Some of these bubbles take forever to walk to, and you only sort of remember what hers looked like. You think she was off... _this_ way, if you've started in Vale and not Vacuo.

The void is a neat place. It isn't quite like the Furthest Ring. It's actually easier to navigate! But the biggest difference is that the only people here are _living_ ones. You have no idea what ultimately happens to souls in this continuum, but you know one thing for sure: the dead do not dream.

Hmm... jeez, you hope she's still anywhere near where she was. And that she is asleep! It's very possible you're wasting your time. You doubt it, though. For whatever reason, your gut is pretty sure you're on the right track.

An hour passes, then two. There sure are a lot of sleepy people...

_There!_ A bubble of charred wood, studded by huge green jewels with strange, shifting images moving across their surfaces: screaming faces, burning buildings, slaughtered children, that kind of thing. Wow, her dreams are just as cute as you remember! That's great.

You yawn, crack your back (in all the wrong places, human spines are bizarre), and get to knockin'.

 

* * *

-( **E** )-

* * *

 

 

_"A-are you... sure we have to_ kill _them?"_

_Cinder turns to level a disappointed, mild glare in your direction. She doesn't have to actually say it this time; that you're still immature and need to learn how to prioritize, that you have to stop having sympathy for both obstacles and pawns. Your shoulders slump and she returns to her work, clearly seeing that you understand_ _and regret your mistake_ _._

_She slides open a vial of red dust, which immediately begins to glow. You force yourself not to close your eyes. When the screams start, you remind yourself: they don't matter. It's all for the greater good, in the end._

_You'd do anything for Cinder, and as far as you're concerned, whatever she wants_ is _the greater good, anyway._

_Thunk. Thunk._

_... Wait, what is..._

_Thunk. Thunk._ Thunk.

 

Oh. Oh god. It's a dream. This is just a memory, isn't it, and... wait. You remember that door from a way creepier dream, weeks and weeks ago.

Holy Gods, it's happening _again._

You guess you might as well open it. Why not? Why not let the terrifying dream monster in? It's better than just sitting here in a frozen memory of some children you let burn to death. Worth it or not, that's just not something you like dwelling on.

"Hello again, friend! Is it alright if I come in and visit for a bit?"

"... Sure. Go ahead. You can't possibly make tonight any more disturbing than it already was."

She grins, and oh, _oh_ that is _way_ too many teeth.

"I'm gonna take that as a challenge. Ooh, who's _that?_ I like the dress, very classy."

"Nobody. Just - just stand over here, okay? Do me the courtesy of _not_ sticking your nose in my personal life."

"Okay, okay. No need to get all defensive. So, be honest with me: did you actually think I was coming back?"

"I don't know. I was _hoping_ you wouldn't," you lie. "Be honest with _me:_ are you seriously some kind of spirit or ghost or... whatever?"

"Hmm... well, let's see... I'm not human and I'm not really a Faunus, so... I guess that's up to you to decide!"

_That's_ not scary at all. Great. Just... great. You want to think, _okay, no, there's no way, she's screwing with me,_ but you know a little too much about the world to actually be sure _anything_ isn't real at this point. Cinder told you once that you would question everything you knew, and she could not have been more right.

Sometimes you miss the early days, when you had been taken in but hadn't actually learned what it was she was trying to do. You think maybe you felt something almost like hope for a while, just for that little slice of time.

"Anyway, I've _gotta_ ask, Emerald - it's Emerald, right? - what's your story? What're you doing with your life?"

Where does she get off coming in here like this and asking you to spill your secrets when she won't even give you a straight answer about whether she's _real?_

"It's none of your damn business what I'm doing with my life. What are you doing with _yours,_ other than haunting innocent people's dreams?"

"Oh, I don't think you're _innocent,_ _"_ she says with a big smile, totally ignoring your question. "Innocent people's dream bubbles don't look like yours from the outside. They're always boring things like trees, or castles, or shiny colors. Your mind was interesting even before I snuck inside it."

"You... could see my mind from the outside? What even is... _outside?"_ All you remember is a tiny glimpse of a black void, but surely there's more than that.

She takes a step forward and leans in real close. You try not to give any ground.

"Oh, not much. Darkness that goes on forever and ever, in every direction, like a night sky with no moon, and the minds of allll the sleeping people in the world instead of stars. It's really neat!"

"Neat is not the world I'd use to describe that."

Aradia... you hate this, you hate that you remember her name... Aradia shrugs as if to say, 'well, to each their own.' She flutters those huge rust-red wings idly, like a huge insect.

"You're pretty when you're scared," she says. You blink and then feel your cheeks flush with a weird mix of embarrassment and indignation.

"Screw you. Are you just ticking off boxes on a big list of different ways to make me uncomfortable or what?"

"Yep!"

She beams and you're left momentarily speechless. By what a jerk she is, not by her smile.

Obviously.

"I can't believe I let you in here. There's no level of boredom that's worth this."

"Aww, come on," she pouts, "don't throw me out _again._ I came all the way over here just to see you, and I only spooked one other person on the way."

"... I didn't say _that."_ You grit your teeth and turn your back to her, which is maybe a good way to be murdered in your dreams, but is definitely a good way to hide your expression from someone. "Why spend a long time traveling through infinite eldritch darkness just to bother _me,_ specifically?"

"Because you're interesting! I wanna know why there are screaming faces and dead pupas all over the outside of your soul."

"Wh- _what?_ Wait, pupas?" Did you hear all of that right? What the hell is she talking about, screaming faces? Ugh, you _just_ turned your back to her dramatically, but you turn back around to glare at her anyway.

"Y'know, pupas? Children? Juveniles? I forget tiny humans don't hatch out of eggs sometimes, sorry."

"Did _you_ hatch out of a freaking egg? No, just - don't... don't even answer. I can already tell by looking at your stupid face." She's winking, is the main way you can tell. It makes you want to sock her in the eye. The big, red-pupiled eye.

Where does she get off having almost the same eyes as you?

"So, kill anyone interesting lately?"

"What?"

"Have you killed anyone interesting lately! I haven't, which is very sad, but maybe I'll get to soon. Here's hoping at least, am I right?"

"... Well... actually, yes. This lizard Faunus who, well, hmm. Let's just say he was a certain kind of traitor and I don't take kindly to that." Actually, _Cinder_ doesn't, but is there really a difference there? "Anyway, the guy's _tail_ popped off when he was running away. It was hilarious. Like _that_ was gonna save him."

"Ooh, that's _neat._ Do you think it would've grown back if he got away?"

"Maybe. He was a coward, that can't have been the first time he had to run for his life."

You should definitely not be having this conversation, at all, but how often do you get to brag about this stuff to people who aren't stupid _Mercury?_ It would be kind of pathetic to come running to Cinder with every cool murder story, and you actually have a lot of those.

"So you... _like_ murder, then?" This might be a question you have never asked anyone before.

"I guess. I'm not thirsty for killing all the time or something, but it's like, if you're going to make a person die then at least _one_ of you should try to enjoy it. That only seems respectful, don't you think?"

"I can honestly say I have never had that thought even once in my whole life." She actually has a point, though... "That  _is_ a good way to look at it."

"Mm-hmm! The thing about me is that I'm really smart and I have a lot of great ideas."

You have to bite your lip to keep from smiling a little. Crap. Dammit. You didn't want to enjoy talking to a horrifying probably-demon that has just been confirmed to murder people.

"Wait a second. If you killed me in this dream... would I die _in real life?"_

"I wonder~?", she says, winking again.

"You are the worst."

"Yeah, I hear that a lot, mostly from people who like me."

"What's _that_ \- uuuugh." She giggles and you roll your eyes. You can't believe she keeps getting you.

"Listen... I might wake up any second for all I know, so..."

"Yes?" With her eyebrows raised like this, she looks almost innocent, like a baby animal, but not in a racist way. Probably.

"So maybe you should, you know. Come by and visit again. Soon."

Crap. Augh. That last word was not supposed to get said out loud.

_"Absolutely,"_ she says, and all you can think is that you're going to get rescued from _more_ nightmares, have them squelched and frozen and replaced with... well... with _her._

This time, when you feel the urge to smile, you let yourself.


	29. Heaven and Earth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Reminder that there's a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com , with fanart!!!!)  
> Sorry about the delay on this one, folks. Lots of stuff happened. Should be back on track now!
> 
> Somebody did an amazing fanart of a ship and I'll be linking to that post here, because everybody needs to see it. She also made music playlists for a few characters, and like, honestly, they're scarily on point. Are you reading my mind or smth?  
> https://pkmn-lillie.tumblr.com/post/167881574940/fixed-thank-goodness-lionheartedfic  
> https://pkmn-lillie.tumblr.com/post/168121064650/character-playlists

_put your new weight in gold and see what it's worth_

_all of the things that go to make heaven and earth are here_

_all of the things that go to make heaven and this_

_success was survival, and kid, it still is_

 

[ _the new pornographers - all of the things that go to make heaven and earth_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzlHDhdJA0A)

 

* * *

RWB **Y**

* * *

  **2nd Morning, Spring Semester**

 

You wake up before pretty much anybody else, which is so not like you. Maybe you're just excited, although you'd think Rubes would be the one who was the most pumped for this. She's flopped halfway out of her sleeping bag, snoring like a little kid, and - ooooh - her head is resting just barely against Jade's arm, oh _snap._ Excellent.

... Okay, fine, you know from experience that she's just an asleep dork who's incapable of staying in one spot and magnetized to warm things, but come on, you can dream. You've got the right to ship your little sister with weird foreign homeless girls if you want to.

Jade, for her part, is snuggled up pretty tight in her own sleeping bag except for her head (ears twitching in her sleep) and the one arm, like the fluff and fabric is keeping her insulated from the rest of the universe. Is that a weird or mean thing to think, that she's like, disconnecting herself from life on purpose? Like yeah okay, you're all weird and poetic because you're still groggy, but you've been living with this girl for _weeks,_ and for all that she's fascinated by leaning even the tiniest weird things she's not used to, she seems determined to be more of a tourist than anything else. It's as if, despite the fact that she kinda just enrolled at _Beacon freakin' Academy_ _,_ she's expecting to just take off any day now and vanish back into her weird impossible homeland.

Ugh. The only theories about where all these people are coming from that make any sense at all are the stupid ones, and you've gone through them all, like: maybe they're time travelers, maybe they're aliens. The obvious answer is that they're _liars,_ but... your gut's never stopped telling you that they're _not_ liars, or at least they're only lying by omission.

God, whatever. You should just be glad Ruby's making friends, which you definitely _are._ She's been... really depressingly alone for most of her life, even if she acts like she doesn't mind. Maybe she really _doesn't,_ but you've always kind of figured she _has_ to be okay with it. When you can't change something no matter what you do, then all that's left is to force yourself not to care anymore.

You'd know.

... Honestly you're kind of happy _you're_ making friends. It seems so pathetic to think it, but spending most of your time taking care of Ruby and absolutely refusing to be anything but yourself kinda left _your_ life weird and empty.

You're startled out of being a downer by Jade yawning. See, that's more like it; she's always the one to wake up first back home. She shuffles around a bit, turns her head, sees Ruby like way up in her personal space, blinks, kind of flicks her eyes around nervously, then slowly and carefully moves away.

Man. You gotta chill on reading into everything all the time. Real life isn't a comic book. People can exist in the same physical space without wanting to get their smooch on. Maybe you're just projecting because you wish _you_ had a crush on somebody, and if someone else close to you does then you can live vicariously through them.

One by one, people nearby are starting to shake off sleep and make various groaning noises. Better get moving; 'initiation' is happening pretty early, whatever that means. You hope it's something exciting and/or violent.

... God, Aradia must be starting to rub off on you.

 

* * *

 **J** NPR

* * *

 

Oh jeez. You're somewhere you totally don't belong, surrounded by really competent people, preparing for some kind of scary-sounding 'initiation' thing, you can't find your locker, _and_ you're afraid of being ambushed by ghosts at any second. This is the worst day ever.

See, over in that corner there's a girl with a _grenade launcher_ hanging out with what looks like an actual ninja, and over there's a kid with a giant _scythe_ _._ Who even does that? Who has a giant scythe, who makes that life choice? Somebody who isn't useless, that's who; you're sure _she_ has the education to be here _and_ probably passed some crazy test.

So sure, you somehow made an actual friend, that's great and all, but now you can't _find_ her, and you're _still_ not sure where your locker is, and you're kind of thinking in circles, trying not to just go hide in a dark corner and hyperventilate. Six-three-six, that's what the paper says. Easy, right? Except you have this terrible gut feeling that it's gotta be wrong, and even if you didn't have that all the lockers are organized weird. If there's some system to it then _you_ sure can't figure it out.

Maybe you should just... ask someone for help? But everybody is so _scary_. Okay, no, you know what? You can do this. Just pick a random person, any person, walk up and ask 'hey, do you know where locker 636 maybe is?' or something like that. You've got this.

There! The closest person is this tall Faunus girl in black and green who's way too classy for you to even look at without being embarrassed, but you have to just do it or else you'll get cold feet again and pass out from stress, and then you'll be doomed, so...

"There you are," she says to somebody else just when you're about to open your mouth. "I hadn't seen you last night and thought that perhaps you simply vanished into the night."

"Nope!", the last voice on Remnant you ever want to hear says. "Just doing some haunting."

It's her. It's the _ghost._ She's standing _right there_ _,_ how could you not _notice?!_

... Wait. But this other girl... talked to her. She said nobody but you would see her or hear her, so you figured this was just how you finally discovered your sixth sense or something. Then how... oh god. Now that you're looking closer at the bat girl, you can see she has _fangs_ even though she also has _ears_ , and don't Faunus only have like, one animal trait? You're almost sure you remember hearing that in school once, probably.

Spooky, wears all black, has fangs, can talk to the dead... you can only think of one logical explanation for this.

 _There's a_ _real, actual_ _vampire going to Beacon Academy._

You have to get out of here before one of them sees you, so you turn as quick as you can and try to run for the opposite side of the locker rooms, and -

_"Oof!"_

\- run right into something that stops you like a brick wall.

"I'm sorry! Are you alright, Jaune?"

"O-oh, hey, Pyrrha." She's got her hand outstretched, palm open against your breastplate. Holy _crap_ she's strong. Is everybody else at this school as cool and tough as she apparently is? You're _so_ outclassed. "Yeah I'm - well, it's just - look over there, do you see that girl?! Tell me you see her."

"... Which one? I see _some_ girls."

"That one! With the horns and the -"

... oh my god. They're nowhere in sight. Do they know you saw them? Are they coming to drain your blood while you sleep and leave you a withered corpse, or turn _you_ into a dark creature of the night, or possess your body and make you do terrible things, or... oh, man. There's no point even thinking about it. If ghosts and vampires want to destroy you, it's not like anything you could do would stop them.

"... N-never mind. Uh. It's nothing."

"Are you sure? You're looking rather pale." Oh no, she has a really concerned expression on her face, it reminds you of one of your sisters. You didn't mean to make anyone _worry_ about you. Sometimes it feels like that's _all_ you do; make people worry about you, get in their way, turn everything dumb and awkward.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about me. How, uh, how are you doing?"

"I'm doing well. I must admit, coming here has been a bit overwhelming, but... well. I suppose dreams are always that way."

"... Yeah. Pretty much."

You feel a little bit better, knowing even somebody as cool and together as her gets stressed about this stuff sometimes. It's sort of a relief. And hey, as long as there aren't any ghosts around anymore...

"You wouldn't happen to have any idea where locker 636 is, would you?"

"I'm afraid not," she says, and then smiles, like she doesn't even think you're an idiot. "Can I help you look anyway?"

 _"_ _Can you ever_ _._ _"_

 

* * *

N **J** KA

* * *

  **30 minutes later**

 

You don't _regret_ signing up for this, not really. It's intense and a little scary, but you think you can handle yourself, you've been through lots of crazy stuff, Dave thought it was a good idea, and it's not like you're alone here; you feel in your bones that you can count on Ruby, and the others are all nice people too.

So no, you _definitely_ don't regret it, but now that you're standing here all lined up at the edge of a huge cliff overlooking a huge forest that's probably full of monsters with no idea what anyone is supposed to be _doing_ here, you come pretty close.

... It's just frustrating to have to be worried about _falling._ You ought to be able to fly _and_ teleport! Height should mean absolutely nothing to you of all people. It's jarring and depressing and it makes you feel naked and small.

Headmaster Ozpin and the stern woman with the riding crop - Goodwitch, maybe? - are watching all of you students with interest and vague contempt respectively as the last few stragglers take their places on their assigned suspicious metal squares. You were hoping all the teachers here would be as nice as Ozpin, but you guess that was wishful thinking. Maybe she's not as mean as she looks? She's holding a scroll in one hand and toying idly with the crop with her other and you have the weirdest feeling that Rose would like this woman a lot.

The headmaster clears his throat. You guess everybody must be here, then.

"For years you have trained to become warriors," he says, and oh boy, _you_ sure haven't, "and today your abilities will be evaluated in the Emerald Forest."

Goodwitch eyes the nervous (and in a few cases, not-so-nervous) kids like you're fresh meat.

"Now, I'm sure many of you have heard rumors about the assignment of 'teams.' Well, allow us to put an end to your confusion. Each of you _will_ be given teammates. _Today."_

Ruby lets out an anxious little whine off to your side. You ignore the urge to say something reassuring; you don't want to get in trouble _instantly._ Also, honestly, you feel pretty much the same. You hope they assign you someone you actually know; one person in particular, and _anyone_ nice would be good, but... if you're stuck on some sort of long-term _team,_ it would be so great for them to at least be people you don't have to hide very much from.

The person you're really hoping for doesn't fit that condition, but she'd be worth the trouble.

"These teammates will be with you for the rest of your time here at Beacon, so it is in your best interest to be paired with someone with whom you can work well," Ozpin says, picking up for Goodwitch for some reason. "That being said, the first person you make eye contact with after landing will be your partner for the next four years."

 _"Whaat?!"_ , Ruby whimpers. A few other students are muttering similar things; a girl somewhere tells someone else _'see, I told you!'_

You can't even bring yourself to show your own massive spike in worry. This is a terrible system! Why is it like this? Is this some weird thing where the teachers are going to be manipulating the outcome, or just a dumb tradition they haven't bothered changing? Is the headmaster secretly a Time player who already knows what's best?

"After you've been partnered up, make your way to the northern end of the forest. You will meet opposition along your path; do not hesitate to destroy everything in your path, or you _will_ die."

 _"_ _Yes_ _!"_ _,_ Aradia, Nepeta, and Yang all say at the same exact moment. A boy you don't know lets out some kind of weird stress-laugh while the girl who was talking to her friend giggles in excitement. Oh boy. You bet _she'd_ get along great with everybody.

"You will be monitored and graded through the duration of your initiation, but our instructors will not intervene. You will find an abandoned temple at the end of the path, containing several relics. Each pair must choose one and return to the top of the cliff. We will regard that item, as well as your standing, and grade you appropriately. Are there any questions?"

"Yeah, um, sir?" The guy who was stress-laughing raises his hand.

"Good!", Ozpin says. "Now take your positions."

Well, _that's_ mean. You guess everyone has a little bit of a mean streak, but it still makes you kind of sad to see it. While you're thinking that, a bunch of people settle into various ready-stances; you don't actually think you have one of those unless you're about to shoot something, which kind of amps up your nerves another notch.

"Uh, _sir?"_ , that kid says again. "I've got, um, a question."

There's a loud _sproing!!_ and one of the metal platforms _shoots_ upward and hurls someone high into the air like a catapult. You stare at the white streak of her body across the sky - is that the girl who was going to hit Ruby? - for a second or two before you really process what just happened.

They are _shooting you off the cliff_ and into the forest, with no warning at all.

"So, this _landing_ thing, uh, what - what do you mean by that? You're, like, dropping us off or something?" Oh jeez. He didn't see her get launched _at all,_ did he?

"No. You will be falling." A few more students blur off into the sky; the headmaster and Goodwitch both just stand and watch. Ozpin seems mildly amused and Goodwitch looks like she's hiding a sadistic smile, which seems to fit with your impression of her so far.

"Oh, I see, so... like, did you hand out _parachutes_ for us?"

"No." Ozpin almost sounds ike he's trying not to laugh. "You will be using your own landing strategy."

There are less and less students down the line, now, as the spring-loaded platforms go off one by one. Nepeta and Aradia are among them, grinning like crazy. You're glad _somebody_ is having fun; you're feeling a lot like this other boy. This sucks! This is terrifying! You can't _believe_ you lost your powers _a month before getting shot off a cliff!_

Okay, you'll just have to, um. Grab a tree on the way down? No, no, you're not quick enough for that. Maybe you can just shoot a lot of bullets and slow yourself? Aagh, you'll _have_ to, but that's not going to be enough for this amount of momentum, not even close.

There goes Yang, stealing part of Dave's personal style and then blasting off like a rocket. You turn desperately to Ruby to ask her for advice, but she doesn't even notice; she looks totally focused and prepared. Are you and that other kid the only ones who didn't plan for something like this?

"Hey, Ruby? Do --" ... oh. She's suddenly gone, just a smear of rose red arcing across the forest. You're... oh crap oh god you're next, you have to figure something out, you have to -

Your footing goes out from under you with a lurch that feels like your insides are being squished down practically into your legs, and your breath is ripped away into a huge blast of cold morning air while you tumble, not even able to scream, clouds and trees trading places above and below you over and over and over and over.

Some kind of survival instinct kicks in and you somehow wrestle yourself out of your spin, dizzily facing the forest and the horizon, and oh god you are maybe going to actually die? You've barely started learning to use your aura, even though you've started out with a weirdly intense natural talent for it, and you don't think you can take a lot of punishment before it drops. Is this enough force to wipe it out and splat you like a bug?

The trees are getting closer and closer, you have to slow down somehow, any way you can, crap crap _crap crap!_ You don't trust yourself to control the recoil on your anti-materiel rifle mode, it might just hurl you into an even worse spin all over again, so you just... whip out your freshly-named Continuum, click into burst-fire mode, and start blasting.

It helps, a little bit.

But it doesn't help _enough._

The treeline is closer and closer, and suddenly your clip's run dry - god, it's so easy to lose track when you're panicked and shooting wildly - and there's one big, huge tree right in your path, bristling with huge branches ready to turn you into what'll look like food for a giant shrike, and you can't shoot yourself away to the side, can't slow down, and is this... is this _it?_

This is such an amazingly stupid way to go out that you can only halfway believe it's possible. If only you could do something, swoop around like the god tier you were or just blink out and place yourself somewhere more convenient.

... You close your eyes. If nothing else, you'd rather not see it coming.

There's a weird and sudden lurch, the inside of your body bouncing around like a can of shaken-up soda, and the wind is gone, you're not moving, or at least you can't _feel_ yourself moving. Did... did you die?

Wouldn't you have felt it, if you died like this?

Something's cool and tickling against your skin, and the sweet smells and sounds of the forest are all around you. You're scared to open your eyes. What if you do and it turns out you have a big tree branch stuck through your body with your guts dangling everywhere, and you're just somehow in shock so bad you don't feel it? Is that possible?

You make yourself do it anyway, sloooowly forcing your eyelids open, trying to brace yourself mentally, and...

... and you're lying perfectly safe and unharmed on the forest floor, nestled in short grass. That big tree is _behind_ you, as if you're on the other side of it, impossibly. No, you must just be turned around, that doesn't make any sense.

None of this makes sense.

You can still feel Continuum's cold, comforting weight in your arms; you didn't even drop it when you hit the ground, if you hit anything at all.

It's actually not even hard to sit up, so you think you really _are_ totally unharmed. Did someone _save_ you? If so, who did it, how did they do it, and where are they? You 're pretty sure you're alone here.

The sun warms your skin in patches where it's pouring like liquid through the leaves overheard, and the morning air feels even more crisp and beautiful after a near-death experience. Bugs and birds chitter and chirp all over the place. Tiny rustles in the brush off dozens of feet in random directions mark the likely positions of small animals.

You hardly know how to process the sudden change, and as the adrenaline fizzes away in your veins, you start to laugh. What else is there to do? You're alive and you don't even know why. It's okay. You're _okay._

Alright, then. You should... start moving, you guess! It's hard to get your mind in the game, but you _do_ still have an initiation thing to take care of; a partner to meet, monsters to probably fight, and a relic to snag. You can just barely hear what must be other students in the distance; there's the occasional gunshot, too, and those are crystal clear.

You load a fresh clip into Continuum, shake your head in another vague attempt to clear it out, and get to walking. Your best bet is to find a partner as fast as possible; two people will be a lot safer than one, and maybe someone else will have some idea how the heck to find a temple in the middle of all of these trees.

There are so many sounds you could chase, so many scents.

One of them is strongest, though, and it's familiar, but it's not what you'd... well, there's no point lying to yourself. You'd been hoping you'd be partnered with Ruby if there was a team system here. It's dumb, but somehow you just feel... _safer_ when she's around, like it's easier to breathe.

Plus, you'll be really, _really_ upset if something bad happens to her. You know she can take care of herself! She can probably do it better than you can. But even still... you'd rather be there to help put some bullets in any monster that thinks she looks tasty!

Maybe she doesn't feel like you owe her anything, but the thing you haven't had the guts to explain is that you _want_ to owe her something.

So, yeah, the smell here isn't the one you wanted. It's not gunsmoke and roses. But it's not like pairing up with someone different means you'll be taken away from Ruby, it just probably means you won't be in the same dorm room or whatever. That shouldn't be a big deal.

And at least the scent of sea salt and cat fur means you can stick with someone you won't have to lie to every day.

You push through bushes and grass, flick away weird bugs, struggle to resist the mighty urge to chase down a squirrel or two, and keep your gun ready. You know you could get jumped at any second, and you're not actually sure what Grimm _smell_ like, or how loud they are.

Shoving aside one last cluster of shrubs, you finally see your new partner, who you guess you're consenting to hang out with for possibly a bunch of years!

"Hi!", you say, smile and wave when she turns to face you.

"I _thought_ I heard salmon over there," Nepeta says, meeting your eyes and locking your weird school destiny in place for good. "Guess that's it, then! Um, you kind of weren't the pacific purrson I was _looking_ for, but I'm glad it's you and not some weird human!"

"You... sort of weren't mine, either, and also hey, I _used_ to be human! But... yeah. I guess that makes us partners, then."

"I guess it does!"

You stare at each other awkwardly for a few seconds. Nepeta scratches the back of her neck; you fidget with your gun. This is... kind of surreal! It doesn't _feel_ like you just gambled on a really big life choice, but when does it ever?

All you can do now is hope it was the right one.


	30. Bloody Evolution (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com ! Check it out for fanart, updates on writing progress, and possibly more.

_but there is comfort in a world_

_where darkness is the only thing we see_

_and cold is all we have to breathe_

_where affectations keep us company_

 

_[alkaline trio - settle for satin](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_2NDvPqPO0) _

 

* * *

 NJ **K** A

* * *

 

You aren't quite sure _what_ made you think that jamming your chainsaw into a tree would be a good way to break your fall, but a few hundred flying wood chips later, here you are on the ground mostly unscathed and entirely surprised that it worked.

After you've spent a moment brushing leaves and splinters out of your hair, you take a look around. The forest is... interesting, to say the least. Atlas was dim, all whites, grays, and cold blues, and while the city of Vale is rather different, outside of its parks it's mostly concrete and neon. By contrast the Emerald Forest very much lives up to its name. There is also an astonishing amount of _life_ here; insects, avians, small mammals, endless points of heat and light flickering through the leaves and grass, an almost overwhelming variety of sounds from every direction at once.

You're fairly sure you couldn't have made sense of this much input when you were yourself; the ability to hyper-efficiently process audio must be one of the many uncomfortably useful changes to your neurological structure that you've undergone while only half-noticing.

There's little time to admire the alien scenery, unfortunately. You need to go off and find _someone_ to partner up with, as unappealing as the idea is, though you have no idea who you would even _want_ for the position. Ugh, you don't think you'll be able to stand it if it's some alien, though if that _is_ how all of this plays out, you'll just have to adapt. You'll have less to worry about if it's one of your own, but there are still potential problems.

Nepeta is kind and certainly skilled enough, but she has a specific type of boundless enthusiasm that can be frustrating at times, and if you have to spend any more time watching her moon over her pale crush you won't be able to keep yourself from serious and decidedly un-romantic resentment.

Aradia is maddening in her own way, but quite a bit more independent, and her sociopathic cheerfulness grates less than Nepeta's earnest and often delusionally hopeful equivalent. However, Aradia is essentially a living manifestation of _chaos,_ and you suspect that anyone stuck overlong in her vicinity will end up arrested even in a best-case scenario.

Jade... could be acceptable, in that she is at least a comparatively calm person, and the type to usually actively avoid trouble rather than draw it to her magnetically. But... you don't think you can bring yourself to trust her, even though you wish you could. If she tries to butt into your emotional baggage again, you're _not_ going to handle it well.

... Odd, that you just categorized Jade as 'one of your own.' She ought to be as alien as anyone else on this awful rock, but despite her perversion and difficulty understanding how you think, you feel a vague sense of kinship. Perhaps it's because she's nearly as much of an outsider to human culture as you are, even if her value system mostly lines up with it.

On top of that, you're technically the same species, now, and that does seem to count for something. This is not a welcoming world for Faunus, though Vale is _slightly_ better than that frozen hellhole up north, and anyone who's on your side of things is easier to stomach.

It wasn't until you came here that you really, truly began to understand what it must have meant to be a lowblood back home. You're surprised some of your friends were even willing to _know_ you given that you were right in the middle of the spectrum; back then you didn't think anything of it, but incendiary anger at your oppressors comes _very_ quickly when you're all the way at the bottom of the heap, instead of having half the world beneath you.

You're pulled from your ruminations on the unfairness of life and society by loud thumping and shuffling in the distance. Something large, scaring away other wildlife and snapping branches underfoot, making a beeline for your position. Your first Grimm encounter, perhaps?

Well, then. Good. It's about time you worked out a bit of _frustration._

A rather immense bear bristling with spines and armor plates crashes through the shrubbery, skidding to a halt to rear up on its hind legs, shaking the trees with its furious voice. You engage your chainsaw in response, settle back into a ready stance, and the moment it makes a move, lunge forward and sever its arm.

You expect to be splattered with its blood, despite knowing intellectually that these creatures don't actually _have_ any; instead, black smoke wisps from the edges of its wounds, the air filled with a powerful stink like fur and old meat and burning viscoelastic polymer. The Grimm screams again, stumbles forward in a blind rage, and suddenly you feel almost _offended._

"I _thought,"_ you grit out, sending its other arm flying up into a tree with an upward swing, "you were _going,"_ cut through its kneecap and let it flop uselessly to the ground, "to be _worth killing!"_

You plunge the chainsaw into its back, severing its spine, drive it so deep it almost passes clear through and bites into the dirt, let it shred this stupid thing's insides. The bear thrashes and chokes, wails in agony, and this is just _pathetic!_ This is not _enough_ to distract you from _anything!_ You rip out your weapon and slam it down again and again, growling low in your throat. It's not moving anymore. Various ground-up bits disintegrate in the grass, and other bits of bloodless gore sizzle against your skin. The beast doesn't even do you the kindness of staining your clothes to mark the achievement.

Suddenly your most recent slash meets hardly any resistance at all; what's left of it has begun to decompose more rapidly, and in a couple of seconds there's more smoke than there is corpse. It's _still_ not enough. Shouldn't there have been _more_ of these stupid things? This is all the challenge you were worth to the universe?

What _are_ you even worth to the universe? Absolutely _nothing!_ Maybe you brought it on yourself when you _failed_ to win the game, when you _failed_ to _save your species,_ when you couldn't find a way to handle Rose's soporific abuse problems, when you _failed_ to protect Karkat from a clown you should have killed _ages_ earlier, when you burned to ash because you couldn't even dodge _one psionic blast._

So yes, you _did_ sort of earn your misery, but in this moment you hardly care. It's _stupid._ It's stupid and it's cruel and you didn't _ask_ for this, you didn't ask to be chosen by fate or any other arbitrary cosmic artifice, you didn't ask to lose your friends one by one to escalatingly idiotic tragedies, you didn't ask to be ripped from your own _multiverse_ and given this body that is _not yours_ and then _abandoned_ by the _one person_ who ever bothered to love you.

All you ever really wanted was to sew dresses and spend time with the people you cared about. Just a normal life, and nothing more.

 _"Damn it!"_ , you scream, swing the chainsaw as hard as you can into the trunk of a tree and put all of your weight behind it, feeling it grind its way through. _"DAMN IT!"_ When it exits the other side you nearly fall over, stumble like Rose on your first date while the tree falls with a deafening rumble and countless cracks and snaps.

 _"Why am I even HERE?!"_ It's not enough, it's _still_ not enough! You'll cut down this whole _forest_ if that's what it takes to feel an ounce of satisfaction, you don't care, you _don't care,_ anything to feel like there's even one aspect of your worthless, continued existence that you can actually change with your own will.

The next tree falls even faster, a thinner trunk assailed with greater fury, and you're breathing hard despite the blaze in your chest that feels as though it's about to burst free and turn all the world to ashes.

"Hello! Having fun?"

You whip around, shocked, ready to slaughter whatever or whoever you see, and before you know it you've met Aradia's wide, laughing eyes.

"I heard mass destruction and I thought, 'ooh, _something_ cool's going on over there, better check it out,' and here you are! Now it's me and you against the world, huh?"

"... What?"

Dazed, you slowly lower your weapon, click it off and let its buzz fade away. You're sweating, shaking, hopped up on a wild rush of epinephrine, and you have no idea what on the hiveworld she's talking about.

"You know, the thing for school. We saw each other, so now we're partners for four human years or something. Unless you saw someone else first?"

"... No, I... didn't."

She giggles and strides happily across the half-wrecked clearing you've created.

"Alright! Elevated quintet, _partner!"_

Without really thinking about it, you raise your hand and let her slap it way too hard.

... Well then. Four human years paired up with the physical embodiment of anarchy it is. You could certainly do worse. Maybe you do deserve to suffer for your many failings, but this, at least, does not qualify as punishment.

What _were_ all of those failings, though? You lost the game, you couldn't fulfill your destiny, you were a terrible matesprit, and... why does it seem as if you were angry at yourself for something more _recent_ _,_ as well?

... Ugh. It's too much effort to try to remember. Anyway.

"We're finding some sort of ruin, I believe?" You're still out of it enough that you'd like to confirm what the hell you're actually doing with someone who didn't just go on a rage-fueled logging spree.

"You bet we are! This is my kind of challenge. I wonder if I can steal anything extra while we're there?" She looks so happy that you're somewhat jealous, but you crack a small smile anyway.

At least someone here is having a good time. You may as well be thankful for that.

**[perfect fanart by pkmn-lille!!!!](https://pkmn-lillie.tumblr.com/post/168678514885/angry-chainsaw-lesbian-goes-logging-holds-no) **

 

* * *

 **R** WBY

* * *

 

Now that you're down here, the forest feels way bigger than it did before? Even when you were zooming over it like a human VTOL, you didn't have a good sense of the _scale_ of this place, it feels like just the Emerald Forest alone must be half as big as all of Patch, and okay yeah that's _probably_ not even a little bit true, but it's still super super huge!

You're sorta okay at getting around in the woods, there's a whole lot of that back home, but the problem isn't really about finding the temple; that's just up north somewhere and you've got a compass on your scroll, so it's only a matter of wandering around long enough. The problem is, well...

How do you find somebody to partner up with, and who's it going to be? _That's_ super scary! What if you get stuck with some jerk who hates you, and then you have to spent the rest of your teenage life getting yelled at or made fun of or constantly ditched for being boring and weird while they go have fun with actual normal people and have an actual normal life? Aaaagh! That would be the _worst thing!_

What you have to do, obviously, is somehow track down either Jade or Yang. You're already used to being around your sister all the time and she isn't usually very mean to you even if she _does_ think you're weird, and Jade is... well, basically she's just as weird as you are! Plus really nice and adorable and she likes a lot of the same stuff, and also she held someone at gunpoint because they were going to slap you, which absolutely nobody but Yang had ever done before. You just... you feel like whatever happens, she's going to have your back.

You're used to being left behind, but you get the sad feeling that Jade is too, in her own way. She wouldn't do the same thing to you.

... Speaking of that, she's been acting weird whenever her other friends come up - not the ones you've been meeting but the ones who are apparently still scattered around the world for no reason. She said she found someone super important, but she seemed _freaked out_ by it as much as she was happy, which is really concerning, and then she just kinda clammed up and refused to talk about it anymore? One of these days you're going to gather up your courage and just beg her to explain because it's making you really really nervous and you want Jade to keep on being the person you don't have to be nervous around ever.

Anyway, other than the two perfect choices, who else is there?

There's Jade's Faunus friends, like Ne... _Ne_ -pe... Ne _-pe..._ oh boy, how do you even stress those syllables? Nepeta, whatever! She's cute and kind of cool but also she's even worse about puns than Yang is and she's _super_ jumpy, she even _sleeps_ wearing her weapons. You get the feeling that if you sneaked up on her by accident she might stab you and that would not be great for team dynamics.

Aradia is pretty much just Yang all over again but with even worse ideas and even less impulse control. You're not sure if you're more worried that she's going to be in jail within a month, or worried that she might have _already_ been in jail at some point and broken out in an epic heist scene like something out of a movie or cartoon and she's just on the run from the law and nobody's caught up to her yet.

You didn't really get a chance to talk to the last one, the bat girl who Jade thinks is mad at her even though obviously she's not because how could anyone ever be mad at Jade about anything, that's dumb? She looks so... _classy,_ though. Jade was also dressed weirdly fancy when you met her, but mostly her outfits are the _cute_ type; this girl looks like she's constantly invited to parties but never goes to them because she's too busy crying. Is that mean? You don't mean it in a rude way, she just seems really sad.

Who else is there... Blake, the one who turned out to be Nepeta's friend! She's actually from a culture that makes sense, and she's quiet and seems nice, but those two seem like they're glued to each other, they're totally going to end up partners for sure, actually. Dang.

That's everyone, right?

Now you're just aimlessly walking around the woods, kind of heading in the direction of random noises in case there are people there, wishing you could smell things like Jade does because then you could probably find her and you wouldn't have to be all anxious and stuff.

You know, the more you think about it the more it feels like you're totally doomed if you _don't_ find either Jade or Yang so maybe you should move a little faster! Now you're kind of jogging, dodging roots and weaving in between trees, trying not to panic and break into a full run. If you do screw up, who else is there that you know? You feel like you're forgetting someone, somehow. Jade, Yang, Nepeta, Aradia, bat girl, Blake, and...

"No. _No,_ you cannot be serious," a familiar voice says as you slam on the running-brakes and skid to a stop in a small clearing.

... That's who. _Her._ The rich girl with the luggage and the yelling, who already hates you. This is a bad dream, right? It's gotta be a bad dream.

"Have you, um, I mean, am I... I'm not the first person you've seen, am I?" Please let her say you're not, _please_ let her say she's already found some other jerk who suits her better -

"Seeing as the gods apparently _hate_ me... _yes._ "

"... Oh no."

"Oh no is _right!"_ , she snaps. "I had planned on _surviving_ my first day at this Academy, but I suspect you'll find a way to blow us both to the moon within five minutes. If I just _neutralized_ you and dragged you off into the bushes, I wonder if they'd let me have a _real_ Huntress to work with?"

"Y-you're joking, right? You wouldn't actually do that!"

" _Of course not!_ Ugh! How stupid can you be?!"

Your instinct is to make yourself real small, or start apologizing, or cry, or run away or something; you don't do well with people yelling at you, especially _strangers_ , and she's sort of right, you did do something embarrassing and stupid yesterday, but...

... No, you know what? This is dumb. If you deserved to be treated like this then your best friend wouldn't have _pulled a gun on her_ to protect you! Jade thinks you're worth it, and her opinion is worth a billion of _this_ girl's.

"Not as stupid as someone who yells at people and threatens them over _honest mistakes_ _."_ You're almost surprised at how your voice barely shakes. She gapes at you like it never occurred to her someone like you might actually talk back. "And even if I am stupid, at least I'm not a _jerk!_ I'd rather be an idiot than be _you."_

You almost wanted to make this work, but no, why should you? Why should you just treat yourself like you're not worth anything to make things easier on someone who never tried to be reasonable in the first place?

"How _dare_ you say something like that to me? You do _remember_ who I am, don't you?"

"Yeah, some rich girl, so what? Being rich doesn't mean you get to be _rude."_

She looks about ready to start yelling and breaking things, or to shoot steam out of her ears like a cartoon character, and suddenly you remember she was kind of going to _hit you_ yesterday, so... what if she does it _now?_ What if she snaps and actually attacks you? She looks totally crazy, literally _shaking_ with anger, and her intense ice-blue eyes are bugging and... - oh.

Her eyes aren't just wide, they're starting to fill up with tears.

You... didn't expect _that._ Now _you_ feel like the bad guy. She isn't actually crying, at least, but still. What if she _does_ cry? You don't want to be the person who makes somebody cry! That's exactly what you want to never be!

"I... deserve... better," she says, slowly, obviously trying to keep herself from losing control. "I've studied, I've trained, I've spent my _entire life_ working to be the _best_ and I deserve better than being chained to someone like _you._ "

"You don't even know me," you say quietly. It's kind of hard to stay mad, somehow. All of a sudden she doesn't seem scary at all, just... kinda _broken._

"And you don't know _me!_ Where do you get off treating someone like me as though I'm just some kind of _villain?_ You don't _get_ to look at me like that, like I'm _bullying_ you, you just, you don't get to _do_ that."

"But you kind of were bullying me? I mean... what else do you call it when you're yelling at people and trying to scare them and make them feel bad?"

"I am not a bully, I'm _not."_

She takes a step back, like she's afraid of _you_ now, even though all you're doing is talking and you're not even being very loud. That's... weird. Why does she suddenly look vulnerable?

Do you really have to fight like this? People aren't perfect. You know that. Yang has a really bad temper, you get flustered too easily and say insensitive stuff sometimes, and Dad is, you know, _Dad._ If you're only seeing someone at their worst, are you actually seeing them at all? Maybe she's just having a rough time. That doesn't mean she _isn't_ kind of a jerk, but... what if you could actually be friends? Wouldn't that be cool?

You're not good at having friends, but you know you _can_ do it, even if it's hard, so shouldn't you at least try?

"I think maybe we just... didn't meet each other very well? I'm Ruby. Ruby Rose. Who are you?" ... oh god that was the most awkward phrasing, whyyyy? Why are you like this?

She turns away before wiping her eyes, as if you can't tell that's what she's doing, sniffles.

"Weiss Schnee. Heiress to the Schnee Dust Company. And don't think you can just butter me up by trying to be the bigger woman."

"I'm not! What does that even mean? I'm trying to be _nice!"_

"Who said I needed your kindness? Why should I care in the first place?"

"Oh my _god_ _,_  why do you have to make this _so hard?_ What is your problem?"

"You! You are my _problem,_ you and your little pet _Faunus,_ not to mention - ah?!"

Without really even thinking about it, you've grabbed her by the shoulder and yanked her until she's looking you right in the eye. The world feels strangely tilted, and you can't remember why you were starting to care about her puffy eyelids or the faint glisten of snot in one of her nostrils.

"What. Did. You. Call. My. _Best. Friend?"_

The whole forest seems dead silent, as if you chased off all the birds and bugs and stuff with your argument, and now all that's left is you and the meanest most unforgivable person who ever existed in the universe.

... And then a low growl breaks the silence, followed by another, and another, and more.

You let her go and she shoves you away, hard. Oh jeez, you really should have known better than to have a big yelling match in the middle of Grimm-infested woods. You probably look _super_ tasty to every monster on the planet.

"We may, er, have bigger problems to worry about," she mutters, and you do _not_ agree with that statement, but she does kind of have a point.

"I hope you're as good at hurting monsters as you are at hurting people," you reply.

" _Hmph._ And I hope the school didn't make a _mistake_ letting a _child_ like you enroll. You'd better be worth it."

... As weird as it is, this kinda reminds you of back when you and Yang were a lot younger, and you'd get in dumb arguments about stuff that was way less serious than this, sure, but more importantly, you had one way of solving them that is super relevant right now.

"Bet I can kill more than you can."

She snorts and tosses her hair, because she apparently belongs in one of Yang's anime.

"I doubt you've been taught to count high enough to keep up with me."

You unfold Crescent Rose as Beowolves creep through the brush from all sides, just a few at first, but they're multiplying a little too fast for comfort. Weiss does something complicated to her silvery rapier, clicks through a couple revolving chambers of Dust. The two of you lock eyes for a moment.

"We'll see about that," you say, and charge.


	31. Bloody Evolution (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com , with fanart, info on updates, and other stuff!  
> also, some REALLY GREAT new fanart as of yesterday, including an illustration of a moment from chapter 18 that has been added into the chapter itself (with purrmission).

_it's like we both have just arrived here_

_like we've just stepped off a plane in a new town_

_and the sun was out_

 

[ _alkaline trio_ _-_ _burned is the house_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lnv2LbaiKM)

 

* * *

 **J** NPR

* * *

 

Being pinned to a tree 15 feet off the ground and just kind of dangling there like a bird feeder for Grimm is _really_ not any fun at all, but it's definitely better than splattering all over the forest floor just because no one told you the semester would start with getting turned into human catapult ammo.

It's been a couple of minutes since Pyrrha's spear shot out of nowhere and saved you from instant death and you were really hoping someone would've found you and rescued you by now or something, but nope, that has not happened. You've just been reflecting on all of the poor life choices that brought you to this point, wondering what kind of monster is going to be the first to get here and eat you first. There are at least a couple different possibilities.

... Wait, is that... a voice? You strain your ears to try to catch it better - hrrrrgh, how does that work, how _do_ you strain ears anyway - no, that's stupid, why don't you just make noise or something so they know you exist?

 _"Heeeey!",_ you call out into the trees. _"Is somebody out there? Could use a little help_ _here_ _!"_

A few seconds pass in silence while you think about the odds that some Grimm heard you instead of any actual real person, and just when you're about to panic, somebody steps out of the brush and into view.

"And what, precisely, ought to motivate me to give it?"

Oh. Oh god, no. It's - it's _the vampire,_ glaring up at you like you're something gross stuck to her shoe.

Your new partner at this school is a vampire. She's going to suck out _all_ your blood, and kill you, and turn you into a new vampire that's her slave, probably, and then you'll have to spend all of eternity bringing her innocent people to drain, and also you'll have to do that for yourself, and this is it? This is what you get for trying to become a hero? Transformation into a lifeless, deathless servant of darkness?

"... pleasedon'tdrinkmybloodandmakemeyourslave?"

"I... excuse me?"

"Aw, don't worry, buddy. She usually only feeds on pretty girls."

 _Why?_ _Why is the ghost here too?_ _!_ What's going on? Are you actually already dead and this is hell? Maybe you never even made it to Beacon. Maybe all of this is a _dream_ you're having while dead. Wait, do dead people dream?

 _"Ohmygodpleasedon'thauntme_ \- hey, hold on. A-are you two, uh... _Partners?"_ Oh god you're an idiot. Why would a _ghost_ be going to school normally? Unless... there's some kind of _program?_ Is the headmaster recruiting supernatural creatures and trying to turn them to work for good instead of evil? That actually makes a lot of sense.

"As a matter of fact, we are. No need to fret over the awful possibility of being stuck with a Faunus." She looks _really_ annoyed, and now you're even more confused.

"Wait, why - no, I don't - I didn't want to be stuck with the _undead,_ I don't care if you're a bat or whatever, that's dumb."

"What in the world makes you think I'm a vampire?" She's staring at you, all but dripping with irritable confusion.

"Aw, come on, you totally are one, though," the ghost says, and maybe-vampire-girl turns on her heel to glare daggers at her.

"I _used_ to be, yes, and now I'm not, _obviously._ Just because I drink a little bit of blood once in a while doesn't make me a _real vampire_ _._ I'm a vampire _bat,_ which is a _normal thing_ that _alive_ people can be." That's... a relief? It still doesn't make any sense, though.

"But... if you're not a vampire, then how can you talk to ghosts?"

"How can I - _what?_ Are you on illegally-procured soporifics? Do you have a head injury?"

 _"She's a ghost,"_ you say, gesturing desperately at the ghost, who looks like she's having the time of her un-life.

"She is not a _ghost!_ What is going on here?"

"Aw, come on, Kanaya, I _used_ to be a ghost! Cut me some slack."

You are so far beyond confused that you can't even try anymore. This is impossible to figure out and you'll get a headache trying. You're just going to wait and hope someone explains what on Remnant is _happening_.

"Are you haunting this poor idiot, Aradia?"

"Only a _little_ bit," the ghost - Aradia, you guess - says, sheepishly. Uh, maybe not _sheepishly,_ that's not great phrasing. You're not racist, you swear! ... Wait, you're thinking thoughts in your brain, not talking with your mouth. Nobody can hear you. It's fine to be accidentally a little bit racist in your own head as long as you feel bad about it, right?

"My friend here is not a ghost. Her Semblance lets her invade other people's dreams, and clearly she has been using it for dubious purposes."

"I was just having some fun! Nobody even got hurt."

"Aradia, I could not care less what you do in people's dreams, I would just to resolve this absolutely pointless clusterpail so we can move on, find the temple, and get this whole ordeal over with."

"Fine, fine," Aradia says, throwing up her hands. "Miss Culljoy."

 _"_ _What_ was that you just called me, _Miss Sociopath?"_

"Er... am I... intruding on something?"

The two of them whip around, Aradia reaching for the sword at her hip and Kanaya for her purse for some reason. Your one and only non-terrifying acquaintance at this school is standing by a large bush, staring awkwardly at both of them.

"Pyrrha!" Her head snaps up toward you and her eyes go wide.

"Oh, Jaune! There you are! Wait, have you..." She turns back to the apparently not undead girls. "Were the two of you already partnered, or...?"

"Yep!" Aradia says happily. "We just now found this guy... _hanging around."_

"I can't believe I'm stuck with this for four years," Kanaya says, rubbing her temples.

"Then, am I... the first free person you've seen, Jaune?"

Wait, _she's free?_ Holy crap, did you actually somehow get partnered with the only nice person who seems to exist in this entire place? You take back all the times in your life you've complained about having terrible luck. Obviously you were just saving it up so you could spend it on this moment.

"Y-yeah, super free. Then, um, if we're partners now, could you... get me down from here?"

"Oh! Of course, I'm sorry!" Pyrrha rushes over to your tree, shows off what has to be at least a _ten foot vertical leap,_ catches the nearest branch under you, pulls herself up effortlessly, and then yanks her spear out of your hoodie, catching you by the arm before you can fall. You hang there for a second, completely in awe of how crazy strong this girl is, and then the branch snaps and dumps you both on the ground. Ow. That armor makes her heavier than she looks. At least you don't think you broke anything.

"So _you_ two seem like fun," Aradia says. "Wanna hang out with us and go defile an ancient ruin together?"

Both you and Pyrrha stop trying to disentangle your limbs from each other to stare. Kanaya sighs, sounding as tired as you've ever heard anyone in your life, and presses her face into her hands.

"Why are you like this," she says, voice muffled.

"I think the real question is why _nobody else_ is like this."

... You've been launched off a cliff into a forest full off Grimm, school rules have just locked you in a multi-year partnership with someone who's skilled and cool _and_ nice, the vampire and ghost aren't a vampire _or_ a ghost but they're both claiming they _used to be,_ and now it's looking like the un-undead girls might end up being your _friends,_ somehow.

Today is at least the second weirdest day of your life.

["Why are you like this?" (fanart by emilyka-artisticweirdo.tumblr.com!)](https://emilyka-artisticweirdo.tumblr.com/post/168696462971/why-are-you-like-this-i-think-the-real)

 

* * *

RW **B** Y

* * *

 

Being out here in the forest alone is a strange feeling. You're used to solitude, and even more used to seeing it as a relief; away from humans, away from prying eyes, away from everything. If you're alone no one expects anything of you. If you're alone no one can criticize you. If you're alone no one can pry your thoughts out of you to make sure they're the right ones.

... But you're away from that place, now, and you've slowly come to feel surprisingly comfortable around at least one person. It _is_ nice to have a moment to yourself after last night and this morning, which were honestly wonderful but very... _crowded,_ but even so you sort of miss being able to look to your side and see a real friend.

God, it's just been _so long_ since you missed someone who was gone instead of missing someone when they were around.

Speaking of her, you should probably try to _find_ Nepeta. It's not that you don't think you could _handle_ a different partner, though it is a bit nerve-wracking to think of being paired with a human you don't know; it's an unfriendly thought, but you can't help it.

Any one of the people you've met recently might be okay, barring _the heiress to the Schnee Dust Company_ of all things. What are the odds someone like her would be here at all? Shouldn't she be in Atlas? And you've already picked a fight with her, even if you did it in a relatively passive way... Ending up with _her_ is definitely your worst-case scenario.

You can hear the faint sounds of people in the woods in pretty much every direction, but none of them stand out as anyone in particular and you can't smell Nepeta, either; she's very _distinct,_ so she must not be nearby. Not many people permanently smell just a little bit like the ocean, especially when they've been nowhere near it in who knows how long. It's hard to miss once you've picked up on it in the first place.

Well, you suppose you'll just choose an audio source and follow it, then. If you hear or smell Nepeta on the way, that's perfect, and if you don't then that's just how it has to be.

There's a lot of shouting coming from the west; sounds like two _really_ angry girls, and you don't want to be a part of that, you're so tired of people with hair-trigger tempers. Someone was apparently doing some _logging_ earlier, and you can't imagine who or why, but you really don't want to think about chainsaws right now. The man you're reminded of wasn't nearly the worst person you crossed paths with due to Adam's connections - that crown goes to the spider girl who even _he_ thought was too bloodthirsty, which is honestly an incredible achievement - but you'd still rather not think about the White Fang right now. Or ever.

Hmm. The only other vaguely nearby commotion is what might be shotgun blasts. Maybe you can sneak up on whoever that is without actually making eye contact, see if they're dubious at all, and then decide whether to go for it? That's the best plan you can think of.

After a minute or so darting through the trees, the sounds of violence escalating, you find your target. It's Nepeta's friend's sister from last night; Yang, if you're remembering right. You've had to put enough effort into memorizing all the weirder names that you barely had room for normal ones. She's breathing hard, smoke rising from bright golden gauntlets on both arms, surrounded by three dead Ursai and at least one crushed tree. You're pretty sure her hair is actually glowing a little bit, which raises some interesting questions.

You wonder what Nepeta would do in a situation like this. Her response to almost anything is to just go for it and see what happens, and while you don't know that she's exactly the ideal role model, maybe you could do with emulating some of her confidence.

... What's that noise? It's high-pitched and a little bit faint, definitely not coming from anywhere close, like a weird warbling bell tolling from somewhere deep in the woods. It's also really, really unpleasant. Whatever it is, you're glad it's not any louder.

Half-masked by the weird bell, you only just barely hear something shooting through the air at what must be half the speed of a bullet. It's not a bullet, though; it's _much_ larger, and also headed more or less your way. You catch sight of it for a split second, a flash of black in between trees, and realize in an odd, dilated instant that it's on a collision course with Yang, who definitely does not see it coming.

Before you've even really made a conscious decision, you've hurled Gambol Shroud on its ribbon to intercept. The projectile smacks into the blade and _splatters,_ dark droplets scattering everywhere; the bulk of it is blocked and the rest splashes into the grass and onto a nearby tree, sizzling and smoking. It smells awful, like hot road tar and burning vomit.

"Uh. Whoa. Was that gonna _hit_ me?"

Oh no. She's turned your way, following the ribbon, and - yep, those are bright red eyes instantly locking onto yours. Damn it. So much for thinking this through. Well, it's not like you would have wanted to just let her get hit by a glob of whatever _that_ was. It can't be helped.

"Yeah, probably. Don't let your guard down. I have no idea where that came from."

Both of you scan the forest in the distance; you pull back Gambol Shroud and prepare for a fight.

... Nothing happens. That weird sound is gone and there's no sign of any other sudden ranged attacks; other than the typical forest noises and the faint presence of students in various places, the only thing you can hear is that tar-like substance burning itself out. It's actually eaten a few inches deep into the tree it hit and the grass is charred and dead wherever it touched.

"That's... weird. Was that a Grimm?"

"Probably. I can't imagine any student having a reason to attack you, or a weapon that does anything like that." You can't think of any Grimm that do anything like it, either, but you're not really an expert on what kinds you should expect in this region.

Yang shrugs.

"Well, thanks for the help, anyway. You're... Blake, right?"

"Blake Belladonna, yes."

"Yang Xiao Long, at your service again." She winks. Wait, weren't her eyes red a few seconds ago? Now they're more like lilac. Come to think of it, you would have remembered them being such a striking, intense color from last night if it had been there. Strange.

"I suppose that makes us partners." God, you hope you aren't going to regret this later. You'll just have to try to trust that life won't turn on you again this quickly.

"Oh yeah! Cool. Nice... sickle-thing, I guess? Is that what it was?"

"A kusarigama. Also a cleaver, katana, and a pistol, technically."

"Dude, that's a lot of modes for one weapon."

You shrug.

"I like to have options."

"Yeah, no kidding. So, now that that's taken care of, let's get this show on the road and find us a relic!" Before you can reply, she's already walking. She... really doesn't waste time, does she? Okay. You can respect that. It seems as though you get along surprisingly well with impulsive people, to go by recent experience.

You're still a bit nervous, but there's not much to do about that. Nepeta's probably already found someone decent on her own, anyway, knowing how quickly she moves.

It's just a shame it wasn't you.

 

* * *

 **N** JKA

* * *

 

"Did you hear that?" Jade's suddenly stopped walking; her ears are pricked and tilted to the side. You paws and try to listen, but there's nothing out of the ordinary.

"Nope! I think your herring is betta than mine, though."

"Yeah, maybe..."

"Why, what was it?"

"I have no idea! Something weird. Kind of like a dog whistle, but not exactly, and I _think_ it was in human hearing range, so..." She shrugs.

"Probably nofin important." That _is_ weird, though! You don't know what the heck would be clawsing a sound like that in the middle of a mostly-normal furrest. There are a lot of people around, though, so it was probubbly just someone with a really odd weapon.

More importantly, this is a _huge_ forest and you are super not lost but you shore wouldn't mind a map right about now. Your scrolls say you're headed north, but that's reely all the direction you've got, which is naut very much at all! All you can do is keep going and hope you trip over the nearest ancient temple.

It's sort of uncomfurtable letting Jade watch your back when you're not even _close_ fronds, but there's no reason for her to turn on you, plus between her ears and her gun, she's de-fin-ately got you covered. She'd hear any monsters long before they could appier, and her rifle can hit from a nautical mile away compared to your claws, which are strictly melee even with the speshell new mode adding a bit of extra range.

"Whale, this is boring. I was imagining a lot more hunting and less floundering around!"

"I'm just glad I'm alive after being _shot off a cliff._ How did you land, anyway?"

"Caught a really springy branch on the quay down! Did you have a rough time with it? You look fin to me."

"That's hard to answer. I thought I was going to die, honestly; I wasted a bunch of ammo trying to slow down but it still wasn't enough. Then, right as I was about to hit a tree, I was just... suddenly fine? I don't really understand it. I don't _think_ I magically regained the ability to teleport, it didn't feel anything like that."

"Hmm... would if eel the same, though? If you _did_ tele-port, that would be your Semblance thingy, right? That might be totally diffurent."

"Yeah, maybe... I _hope_ it is. i miss flying and teleporting, but I think if I could have one back, it would be that. It just felt like such a natural and obvious part of me, you know?"

"Not really, but it makes sense! I didn't have any superpowers to lose, but a bunch of stuff got shed and thrown overboard when I got this body."

"Oh, right... um, sorry if that was awkward. I didn't mean to remind you."

"It's not the end of the whirled. Kanaya's the one throwing a hiss-y fit about it. I don't _like_ it, but I'm not letting it sa-boat-age my chances of being happy."

"... I don't think she's really _letting_ it make her feel bad. She doesn't seem like she can help it. It's kind of rude to act like you're better than her for something she can't control."

You slow down and glare at her over your shoalder. Who does she think she is, criti-capsizing you like that?

"Hey, her fishues aren't my purroblem. You're the one sniffing around when she doesn't even _want_ you to, so don't pretend you have the moray-l high ground."

"That's - ugh. Fine. Whatever. I guess you're not _completely_ wrong - _wait, stop!"_

Her tone is sharp enough that you listen without questioning it. This terns out to be a good idea, because half a second later, a grenade hisses through the air in front of you and blows up a nearby bush.

 _"Hey! Be careful with those!"_ Jade's ears are pinned down against her scull. She does _not_ look happy.

"Whoops, sorry!" Some gill, yelling back to her. There are a couple more explosions in the distance. Some big animal screeches in pain. Ten or fifteen seconds go by, and finally a buoy in green and a gill in pink show up. You can't see any visible weapon on him; she's hauling around a grenade launcher.

"She got a little carried away," the boy says quietly. The girl giggles, puts away the launcher, and scratches her head.

"Yeah, that was my bad. There was an Ursa and I got a little too excited, I guess! First kill of the day, you know?"

"We've still got zero krills. I thought this forest was supposed to be full of prey, but no, I'm just bored."

"Aww, that's no fun," she says. "You could come with us! More people means more feelings, more feelings means more monsters!"

"Or, more reasonably, more people means less chance of anyone being hurt," the buoy says. She sticks out her tongue. You look over to Jade, who shrugs; you guess she's letting you captain this one.

"... Yeah, shore, why not?"

"Woo-hoo! Murder, here we come!" The girl in pink pumps her fisht in the air. Her frond and Jade sigh at exactly the same time. They're both the lame conchflict avoiding type, you guess. You like the way grenade gill thinks.

"I'm Jade. Jade Harley," your lame partner says.

"Nepeta Leijon!"

"My name is Lie Ren."

"And Iiii'm the one and only Nora Valkyrie!"

"So, do you two have any idea where this temple is supposed to be?" Jade looks hopeful for a second, befur Nora shakes her head.

"I'll take another look around," Ren says, and disappears up into a tree with a few quick hops. Jade stares after him as if it's somefin impressive. You're starting to realize she is not even a tuna bit athletic.

"He's basically a ninja," Nora stage-whispers. A few seconds later he drops back down, landing in a crouch that's not _impurressive,_ exactly, but still reely good form.

"There's a stone structure the the northwest. That's probably it."

 _"Fiiiinally,"_ Nora says. "Do you think there are any monsters _there?"_

"Cod, I hope so," you grumble.

You didn't plan on makoing some kind of _group;_ you like to hunt alone, it's weird enough having to grubsit Jade through all of this. But at least they're useful, and one of them likes to have fun, which is dolphinately encouraging. Too bad your partner isn't moray like her.

"... Did anyone else hear that?" Ren has a weird look on his weird human face.

"No," you and Nora answer.

"Yeah," Jade says. "I think so. I heard it earlier, too. What is it?"

"I have no idea."

"Hmm... well, I guess if it's something bad, we'll find out one way or another. By the way, you have _really_ good hearing for a human."

Ren shrugs.

"Ocray, enough chasing our tails. I want to either find something to hunt or get the dumb relic and go home already."

You check your scroll real quick to make shore you actually know where northwest is, and just start walking. They're all slow, so they can just follow you, and you don't like terning your back on strangers, but even if Jade is kind of boring, she isn't going to let anybody pounce on you while you're not looking.

This day had betta get more interesting soon. Hopefully you'll finally run into Blake sometime schoon; it's embarrassing, but you kinda hiss her already, and if anything bad happens to her when you're not looking you'll never furgive yourself. You just hope she at least managed to fish up a decent partner.

A small part of you kind of hopes she didn't, though, beclaws there's a chance they could be betta than you are, and then you'd have to kill them.

... You're just kitten, of course.

Probubbly.


	32. Sound and Furry (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com , where really awesome fanart continues to pile up and you can get surprisingly frequent and weirdly-styled updates on my progress with each chapter!
> 
> This one got long. Hope y'all are ready for a brick of an update.
> 
> *edit: blake did not have much to do this chapter, to the degree of being a little bit of a screw-up, but i wanted this thing posted. she's one of the main characters in this thing, so don't worry, she's got pleeeenty to do in the next few chapters, and also forever.

_are you ready for the rest of your life?_

_see the fear bleeding right through their eyes_

_feel the energy build in your soul, 'cause it's time_

 

[ _disturbed_ _-_ _immortalized_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Auuqlcom6tM)

 

* * *

 RWB **Y**

* * *

 

So, this initiation thing is off to an interesting start. You're not sure if you were hoping for any specific partner; Aradia would've been cool, but a lot of people you've met recently seem solid. Blake came across as pretty much a nice person, a little quiet for your tastes, but hey, maybe you'll drag her out of her shell. She obviously knows how to handle herself in a fight _and_ she saved your butt once before you even noticed she was there, which, y'know, seems like a pretty good omen. You can work with this.

Mostly you hope Ruby lucked out and found Jade. She's going to be totally broken-hearted otherwise. Well, last night's crew didn't have any jerks in it as far as you could tell, so as long she landed one of them she's gonna be fine. It's not like she'll end up glued to that scumbag Jade had to threaten, and she's really the only bad egg you've heard of.

"So hey, I never got the chance to ask the other night, but outta curiosity, how'd you end up meeting..." You gesture vaguely at nothing. "This whole chain of crazy people, basically?"

"That's a complicated question," Blake says, somehow following you through the underbrush without crunching any leaves. Finesse types; who knows how they do it? "You already know I'm Nepeta's friend, and she's _Jade's_ friend, and Jade is your friend. So... which part are you curious about?"

"I mean, all of it, sort of, I'm bored out of my mind now that I ran out of Ursai to punch. I guess I'm most curious how you reeled in the catfish."

You're expecting her to groan or something, which is pretty much the ideal response to terrible puns, but she actually just takes it in stride. She must really be around that girl a _lot_ if it barely phases her anymore.

"She was out in the woods, beaten and bloody, ripping apart a whole pack of Beowolves without a proper weapon. She had somehow gotten the claws off of one and just... _used those._ I can only assume she kept ripping fresh ones off her kills as they disintegrated."

"Holy what the crap," you say, because yeah, holy what the crap. "How does somebody even _do_ that? What was she doing out there in the first place?"

Blake sighs; you look back over her shoulder and there's a weird kind of not-quite-sadness there, mixed in with a hint of frustration. Hmm.

"They do it by being Nepeta Leijon, I guess, and I have no idea where she came from. We've been friends for weeks and she still won't explain herself."

"Well _that's_ familiar," you say, shoving a branch out of your face. "Jade just showed up in the middle of the city one night like she'd sprouted out of the freakin' ground, and none of her explanations for it actually make sense. Like, she's... I don't know. She's been good to Ruby, I like her, but she's hiding something. Same with Aradia and her depressed friend."

"Yeah," she says quietly. "Something very strange is going on and I don't know how to feel about it. Nepeta..." Blake hesitates. "She clearly had no aura when I found her, so I stepped in to help. The thing is, I found out afterward that hers was _dormant_ _,_ not depleted. She'd caused that whole scene without having unlocked it in the first place. I had to do it _for_ her."

You actually stop for a second after that, because dude, _what?_ The similarities are getting even creepier, and all these weird people are seeming more and more dangerous by the second. Even Jade isn't really exempt from that. She seems harmless enough, but you just don't get to her level of skill with guns without training your aura to help slow your perception of time. Like, that's Combat 101 stuff, everybody knows that.

"Well _that's_ sorta terrifying, if still pretty damn cool. Also, you unlocked it _yourself,_ huh? That's a little intimate. Any more to that story?" You can't help but wink and wait for a response. She doesn't disappoint, blushing almost instantly, although not as much as you wanted her to.

"She's a _friend._ It was a little weird, but she needed help. Don't make it something it's not."

"Sorry, sorry. Didn't mean to be rude." You actually are a tiny bit sorry. It _was_ funny, but she sounds legit uncomfortable, and that's less funny. "Hey, Blake?"

"Yes?" She's started walking again, but you'll be damned if you're gonna walk somewhere and not be in front, so you pick up the pace as much as you can without jogging and looking really petty.

"Look, we just met and all, but we're partners for like a billion years, so... I mean, assuming you don't end up _hating my guts_ or whatever..."

"Can you get to the point?" Her tone's kind of sharp. Jeez, you really gotta watch your words around this girl, huh? And you are _really_ not good at that, either. Ho boy, you're gonna be in for a wild ride.

"I'm just saying, I've let it go for now because I kinda had to, but I'm _going_ to find out the truth about all these cool women who keep wandering in from nowhere. I owe it to my sister to keep her safe and also it's just kind of driving me nuts. So I guess I'm asking if you want to know, too, and if you do, are you gonna be willing to _help_ somewhere down the line?"

"That's... quite something to ask someone you met less than twenty four hours ago, Yang." Now she's less sharp and more wary. You _know_ you're coming off weird but this is important, you need to get this crap established right out of the gate so you know where you stand.

"Yeah, I get it, and I'm sorry about that, but it sounds like you're all tied up in this thing too, and if it _does_ turn out to be a _thing_ I wanna know I'm not the only one who'll be ready when it finally blows up."

She's quiet for like ten whole frustrating seconds after that. Then she sighs again. You're getting tired of looking over your shoulder to see her face, maybe you should just give in and walk next to her. Ugh. You always feel antsy when you're not leading the charge.

"A while ago, I... I guess you could say I was feeling paranoid. I pushed Nepeta a little further than I should have, trying to get her to give me some tiny hint about her mysterious backstory. And I got this strange impression from her, as if she would have been angry or hurt if anyone else asked her, but she was going to give me a free pass. Do you know what she said to me?"

"Not unless you come out and tell me, dude." Man, that kind of phrasing always grates a little. Like, obviously you don't _know,_ so why even say it that way? There's gotta be a less obnoxious way to get the same dramatic effect.

"... She said it wasn't as important as I thought it was, but she didn't want to explain because I'd think she was crazy, and then I wouldn't want to be her friend anymore. I'd never seen her actually look _afraid_ before, and I felt awful about it, so I decided to just let it go."

God, this just gets weirder and weirder, doesn't it?

"What are you getting at?"

"That I agree with you, to an extent, and it scares me not to know what's happening, but... I want to try to respect it. I don't know about you, but I have my own share of things I'd rather not talk about. If they're all keeping secrets... well, they probably have a good reason to, and I don't want to assume it's something nefarious. Not yet."

... Now you're the one sighing, because she's making you sound all inconsiderate for acting cautious about your sister's best friend and maybe-crush being a creepy mystery girl. She does have a point, but... Y'know what, fine, whatever, she can win the debate for now. Quibbling over this crap is wearing you out anyway. Maybe bringing it up was a mistake.

"Alright, that's fair. It's not like I _want_ to be suspicious. My perfect outcome is that whatever's going on here ends up so weirdly normal it's embarrassing, you know?"

"Yeah," she says, _real_ quiet, and just then you shoulder past a low-hanging bough on some weird tree and into a wide clearing with a big, totally blatant ruined temple smack in the middle of it. Nice! Totally perfect timing. Nature's handed you a smooth change of subject.

"You think that's the place?"

She comes to a stop next to you, makes sure you see her rolling her eyes. You guess that's her answer. The ruin here is actually kind of big, it's just real spread out; this is totally the main part, though. It's got these real obvious pedestals arranged in a ring, and each of them's holding up...

"Chess... pieces?" She's leaning in toward one of them, looking like she's nervous about touching it - as if there's going to be a booby trapped piece of school property on day one, sheesh. Then again, you got shot out of _catapults_ thirty minutes ago _,_ so maybe all bets are off. "Well, let's pick one and head back to the cliff."

You could sit around here and like, analyze them to figure out whether there's some extra special type that's worth more mystery points or whatever, but nah, you're not about that life. Instead you snatch the closest one and wave it her way.

"How about a cute little pony?"

Blake rolls her eyes again, a little bit more fondly this time.

"Sure." She leans forward to get a closer look but you're already shoving it in your pocket. This morning's gone on long enough, you made everything awkward, and you really just wanna be done with this.

"So are we, like, the first ones here? That can't be right, can it?"

"I don't think so," Blake says, looking at the mostly-unbroken circle of chess stuff. "This place isn't exactly difficult to find."

Then her head snaps up and off toward the trees, suddenly. You follow suit, but it's just some regular forest over there. Did she hear something you didn't?

A few seconds go by. You're about to ask her what her deal is when two people suddenly emerge from the tree line, both of them looking _real_ disheveled and grumpy.

... Oh no, you can't be serious. Man, _what?_ Did you jinx this or something? That is your little sister, scythe propped over her shoulder, with an uncommon glare plastered on her face, leading a pale girl in a fancy ice blue skirt who looks even _more_ pissed off, and most importantly fits the description of the jerk who was going to _slap_ the aforementioned little sis.

You guess you might as well try to play nice for at least half a second, so you swallow your shock and give Ruby the cheeriest wave you can manage. She finally looks up, and when she catches sight of you, she almost looks happy.

She was so _excited_ to come to school here; so are you, obviously, but god, you thought she was actually starting to be happy, and now _this_ happens.

... Yeah, you're probably gonna have some words for Rich Girl before the day's done.

In _private._

 

* * *

**N** JKA

* * *

 

 _"Why?_ Why did you do this?!" Jade skids to a stop, aims her rifle and fires a few bursts up through the leaves befur breaking into a run again. It steams to you like she's making an awfully big deal out of somefin small.

"Aw, come on! This is _way_ less boring than just walking around with nothing to do, right?" Nora, on the other frond, has great ideas and you support them completely, unlike both of your boring teammates. She stumbles over a broken branch or somefin and Ren grabs her arm, yanking her to the side; a rain of giant avian plumage decorates the dirt in her old pawsition a split secod later. You notice she doesn't even flitch when he touches her. Those two creek of morayllegiance.

(Neuterally you remember humans don't have that, but come on; scow are you supposed to bereef there isn't at least something _similar?)_

"Yeah, reely! Do you just _hate fun,_ Jade?" You would ferry much prefer having something to hunt, even if technically it's hunting _you_ right now. She's such a scaredy-cat. Dog? Scaredy-dog just doesn't sound right...

"As long as we can use the trees for cover, we'll be fine," Ren says, breathing hard. He has no stamina at all, does he? Reedy people nefur do. Aren't humans supposed to be perchsistance hunters just like trolls? He's doing a terrible job of being his own species.

"How are we supposed to fight this stupid thing if we can't see it half the time? My rifle has a mode that could probably take it out or at least clip its wings, but I can't get line of sight for long enough and I can't afford to waste the ammo." Jade has a speshell weapon mode, huh? That's betta than you thought the situation was, at least. Just having a regular old rifle with burst fire didn't make a lick of sense. You guess she's not _totally_ useless.

"Oh my cod, clam down, it's just a bird! We find the edge of the furrest, bait it back and forth, somebody covers Jade while she aims her cannon or whatever, and it'll be fin-ished." You're all supposed to be hunters, and somehow you're the only one who's any good at planing these things? They are _retched_ at this, no wonder their society acts like prey. How shelltered can they _be?_

"I found some open space!" Nora is somehow yelling from way ahead; at least she's _fast_ even if she's kinda dumb. You've been way slowed down beclaws you had to tackle Jade out of the way _twice_ already and it's _so_ awkward but if she dies you're pretty sure you're sunk at this school, so whatefur. Hopefully somebody schoolfeeds her a thing or two schooner than later; you don't want to be the one who has to do it, because partner or not, her self-impurrovement is not your problem.

God, she's going to be an irrigating person to work with. Why couldn't you have just serendipitously sniffed out Blake? You bet _she_ wouldn't put you through this carp.

Okay, _there,_ that's the end of the trees, and yep, there's plenty of mostly clear grassland... ooh, and that's gotta be the shipwrecked temple you're looking for, since it's kind of a bunch of temple-shaped stone ruins. If it's not, then it is a very clever deception.

Much much more impurrtantly, there's a small grouper of people in the middle, and one of them is a certain cute kitty with a bow.

 _"Hi guys!"_ Jade calls out, catching up at last. _"We brought a giant killer bird!"_

Whale, at least she has the sense to conchmunicate basic information.

"Dude, _nice!"_ Oh, there's Jade's friend's sideways ancestor giving a big thumbs-up, the one with the long yellow mane. She seems pretty happy to be less bored! That is at least 3-to-2 in favor of avoiding boredom. Wait... _she's_ the one who hooked _your_ pale-crush, isn't she? Ruby and whoever that other gill is look too hissed off at each other to naut be stuck together, so she must be.

... You will do your best to be polite for Blake's sake, but she'd betta not drag her down. As long as she's not angling for anything and she doesn't hurt her somehow, you are willing to put up with her existence.

"Oh my god, that thing is enormous," Blake says, staring up at the big black shadow in the sky, which is current-ly circling back around over the tree.

"Lovely, it's _you_ again," the girl in white grumbles, glaring at Jade. She made an enemy _already?_ You're not sure if that's a good sign or a bad sign, but it means she must have picked at least one thing not to be a pushover aboat. "Keep that gun of yours pointed at the _Grimm_ this time, please."

"If you behave yourself," Jade says, glaring back at least as intensely. Yeah, somefin _definitely_ happened there. Too bad there isn't time to get the whale story.

"It's coming this way!" Wow, that Ruby girl is _super squeaky_ _._ Since last night you'd already furgotten that she sounds like someone synthesized a voice out of audio samples from an elastic polymer mallard. "Who all has ranged weapons? The faster we shoot it, the better!" Huh. She didn't seem like the type to take the helm. Maybe you misjudged her; sometimes the little guppies are a lot tougher than they look.

(Karkitty was a purrfect example of that; nobody would've thought _he_ was your session's leader, and yet there he was screeching orders all over the place, and everymoby _listened_ to him, too.)

Everyone scatters as the bird rushes through the clearing like a flying whale, its wingbeats sending waves through the grass. This is a tuna bit annoying, just beclaws you aren't much use against something that swims so high up.

"Nora, grab one of the relics!" Hmm. That Ren buoy is boring, but he does have a good head on his shoalders. Grenade launchers _are_ more of a medium range thing. You guess you'll take a page from his log, since you can't reach the prey anywaves.

"Jade, go set up your gun or whatefur," you yell over the roaring wind left in the bird's wake, and run off toward the temple. If you don't seaze the cargo now, it's all going to get wrecked and then you'll never find it, and that would not be great for your purrformance in this initiation thing.

It looks like the treasures are little chesshire pieces, which is weird and nostalgic. You haven't seen any of those in sweeps, not since Sgrub. They're all perched on little stone pedestals, which is kind of simple enough to be insulting; between this and the combat test, you're guessing most human challenges are so easy wrigglers could do them.

Nora makes a weird excited human cooing noise and takes one. To be fair, it wouldn't be weird if there were any _clicks_ in it; other than the fact that it's coming from a single vocal chamber, it's kind of troll-ish, like a lot of other alien voice stuff.

Hmm... water _you_ going to pick, though? Other people have gotten their paws on maybe half of them, but there are a lot left over.

Oh! There's a black knight. Purrfect. That feels like the obvious right choice. Maybe it's just because it remoraminds you of Equihiss, but that's as good a reason as any when you have no quay of knowing what the school wants from you.

Jeez, that's a _lot_ of gunfire. You shouldn't be surprised, there _are_ like six people all spraying different weapons at once, but still. This has got to be the noisiest a sleepy forest temple could pawsibly get.

 _"_ _Every_ _one_ _look out! Deathstalker incoming!"_

A tall human girl in red and brown armor bursts out of the woods with Kanaya, Aradia, and some screaming buoy you don't know all right on her tail, and aboat two seconds later fifteen feet of overgrown scorpion follows, smashing its way through a couple of trees, which crash to the ground as loud as waves in a tsunami, sending hundreds of tinier birds chittering into the air.

... You were _furry_ wrong about how loud this forest could get.

 

* * *

R **W** BY

* * *

 

Five minutes ago, you thought having a black-hearted idiot girl chained to you for your foreseeable future would be the _most_ stressful moment of the day. Now you are stuck with the same awful organism in a ruin filled with _eleven other people_ running around like chickens with their heads cut off, yelling constantly and firing extremely loud weapons at _two_ enormous and enraged Grimm _all at once_ _,_ and you think that perhaps you should have remembered that no matter how terrible things are, they will always find a way to get worse.

You almost hope the Grimm will pick one or two of them off just to quiet things down a bit.

... Better yet, you hope one will pick off the utterly insolent dog who just told you to _behave,_ as if she thinks she's the _parent_ of a _disobedient chil_ _d_ at best and a pet owner prepared to swat an animal with a newspaper if it barks too loudly at worst. You aren't even sure which simile makes you angrier.

"Weiss! You can keep making ice, right? Go try to slow that Deathstalker down or something!" Your... ugh, _partner,_ seems to think you take orders from her all of a sudden. No. That is _not_ acceptable conduct.

"Don't tell me what to do! There is no way you're more qualified than I am when it comes to making decisions in the field." You survey the chaos yourself. Currently the Deathstalker, which is significantly larger than it has any right to be, is scuttling about and doing its best to spear some useless-looking boy in - is that a _breastplate_ and _jeans?_ What in the _world?_ \- as he runs in circles; it's taking grenade fire from a girl in pink and more conventional bullets from not one but _two_ others with ranged weapons who ought to be helping _you,_ while a shabby-looking cat Faunus slashes its legs with what appear to be bracer-mounted claws. The traitorous firearm wielders appear to be yet another Faunus, this one dressed frankly indescribably and carrying a pair of ridiculous curled horns above her manic grin, and... wait.

Is that _Pyrrha Nikos?_

Are you losing your mind, or is a worldwide celebrity no more than sixty feet away, _wasting her rifle ammunition on a massive scorpion_ when she should be helping you all with the _colossal Nevermore_ that both _requires_ range and accuracy to target _and_ is lacking in thick bulletproof armor?

Meanwhile, some painfully unremarkable boy with a pair of machine pistols has managed to harness his intellect enough to actually use them on something they'll _affect._ Why he's able to make this decision while one of the world's most talented arena fighters failed to do so is completely beyond you, but you suppose it's better than nothing.

At this point you think you ought to make the official decision to embrace superstition, because you can't imagine life making sense again unless you can find someone to _cleanse_ _you of curses_. Nothing less could be responsible for this kind of madness.

"Hey, I'm serious! Your little spinny frost things aren't exactly _hitting_ this Nevermore, anyway." Ruby. Again. That is _it,_ you have officially taken _enough_ lip from this child.

"I _said_ not to _tell me what to do!_ I think they can handle themselves, and I'm going act as I see fit, not according to the whims of a _moron!"_ With that, you're about to go back to attempting to freeze the stupid bird's wings and bring it down, seeing as Ruby's _dog_ is taking her sweet time aiming the ungodly long contraption her rifle has just transformed into, but said dog decides to offer her own undesired input.

"What did I just say? Are you really going to insult the best friend of the girl who's holding an _anti_ _materiel rifle_ right in front of her? I am not a violent person, but you've really managed to test me for somebody I've only talked to twice!" She takes her eyes off the weapon she's loading a truly enormous projectile into to glower at you.

 _"Not a violent person?_ You held me at _gunpoint_ _!"_ Not a violent person your _ass._ She's like a junkyard hound off its _leash_.

"You were going to _hit_ her for basically no reason!" And now she's completely forgotten the Grimm, because clearly shouting at you is _much_ more important. You fire off another wave of ice blasts in the Nevermore's general direction, but it's wheeling away again and you miss by an embarrassing margin.

 _"How is that an excuse?!"_ Honestly, you don't see it! You may have gotten _slightly_ too worked up, but there is a distinct difference between slapping someone and pushing the barrel of a loaded firearm up against a human body.

"How is it _not_ an excuse?! What do you _expect_ someone to do when you threaten one of the only important things they _have?!_ _"_

 _"_ _GUYS!_ Can you _chill out for one second_ and deal with the _enormous freaking bird?!"_ It's the blonde, whose eyes you did not notice were burning red; she mostly looks furious at _you,_ but even if she's stupidly taking the wrong side, you'll grant that her priorities are in a better place than yours at the moment. You shouldn't have let dog-girl's immaturity drag your attention away from the fight.

Dog-girl looks as if she's biting her lip to keep from continuing; you huff and look back to the sky. The sounds of violence behind you haven't gotten any closer, so you assume you can continue to ignore the Deathstalker. The Nevermore is flying directly toward your group, though it's still at quite a distance; no point in wasting any dust on it quite yet.

"Come on... a little closer... a little closer..." The dog is muttering to herself, finally preparing to take her shot. She'd better make it count; nothing anyone has hit this stupid thing with has done more than ruffle its feathers, and while you have very little faith in her usefulness, she _does_ have by far the largest gun. Frankly, its bulk takes it a bit beyond 'anti materiel rifle' and into territory that's trickier to define. "And... _now!"_

The rifle, currently braced on her shoulder with not so much as a bipod, _erupts._ That's the best word you can think of for the phenomenon. The sound is nearly painful, closer to a _rocket launcher_ in its intensity, and indeed you see her thrown wincing to the ground, aura rippling green where the stock slammed into her body, all half-obscured by a frankly surprisingly wide cloud of dust smoke. Its projectile, whatever it actually is, tears a fierce streak of orange and emerald across the sky; you admit to some curiosity as to precisely what on Remnant she's concocted here.

Unfortunately, the Nevermore displays an unnerving amount of intelligence, cutting itself off in mid flight with what must be an incredibly powerful beat of its wings, and the streak misses by what can't be more than a couple of feet, if that.

Then it beats its wings again, more slowly, holding its position. It takes you a moment to realize what that movement telegraphs, and just as you do, you hear a small gasp from both Ruby and the black-haired girl you'd almost forgotten about, who have clearly both made the same connection.

 _"_ _Get aw -_ ..." The black-haired girl's words vanish in the roar and shriek of gargantuan feathers shearing the atmosphere, and as you reflexively twist your aura inside yourself, the world slows to a crawl, dozens of black missiles not-quite-freezing in their paths.

If you don't move in this brief moment of altered perception, you will be battered by god only knows how many razor-tipped feathers, your aura likely overwhelmed in an instant as you're impaled and crushed into the ground; a Nevermore of this size could easily down an _airship._ Naturally, you're fast enough to manage, so there shouldn't be any concern - _oh._

Very abruptly, you realize that the Faunus is still knocked on her rear, and she is in no position whatsoever to save herself. The instant you make your escape, she will be skewered.

... Another place consumes you, another time, Myrtenaster's polished edge grating against bone, crimson drops splashing on ceramic tiles, the sick sucking sound as it comes loose, so much blood pooling at her feet and this isn't it, this isn't what you wanted, this is _not_ what you wanted, _this is NOT WHAT YOU WANTED!_

You twirl your weapon in your hands, fall to one knee as you punch it deep into the dirt, pull the trigger, and pour your soul into the dust ejected along its blade.

The world goes blue, and you are once again consumed, this time by the furious sound of spear-like shafts of bone slamming into a wall of ice that is shaking, cracking, reinforcing itself, cracking again, spiderwebs of white spreading wider across its surface and deeper into its bulk, and you're not sure whether your perception of time is still somewhat stretched or the beast has far more ammunition than you expected.

Just as your shield is about to shatter, the rapid pounding comes to a halt, and you allow yourself to breathe again.

"Are you alright?!" You don't really even think before you speak; it just happens in tandem with yanking your sword free of the ground and whirling to look at the Faunus girl, who, as it turns out, is indeed unharmed, staring up at you with wide eyes, her white ears pressed flat against her head. "You could have _died,_ you idiot, why didn't you _move?"_

"I... um..." She appears to be at a loss for words, and as waves of adrenalin roll through your body, you find yourself in the same position. "Are you... crying?"

Shocked, you brush your fingers across your cheek to find that it is indeed streaked with tears. You don't know what's wrong with you, why you risked _your_ life for someone like her, why you cared, why you _still_ care. It's baffling, it's upsetting, it makes you want to slap in her stupid face for forcing you to feel something this _incorrect._

 _"Jade_ _y_ _ou'realive_ _ohmygod_ _!"_

Ruby tackles her friend to the ground in a flurry of inexplicable rose petals, hugging her tightly enough to elicit a quiet _'hgrk,'_ and then looks up at you, all relief and astonishment. She opens her mouth, then closes it again.

... So the girl's name is Jade.

You rather wish you hadn't found that out. It's extraneous. Intrusive. Distracting. Frustrating. Upsetting. You greatly preferred it when she was still 'dog girl.'

Jade, wriggling out of Ruby's arms oddly slowly, faces you. Her eyes lack the sense of savagery you have come to associate with them; what remains is far beyond your comprehension, something much too complex to pick apart.

Wordless, she retrieves her weapon, triggers a collapse back into its original form as a rather bulky battle rifle, rises to her feet, still a bit shaky. You wonder if you yourself are standing firm or not; the world seems slightly tilted, _off_ by one or two degrees.

How do you proceed? There's a battle still raging behind you, a terrifying bird-thing still haunting the skies, and your brain seems halfway inaccessible. You need to make a decision, move forward, but...

"Ruby," you say, toneless and calm, "What do we do next?"

"... We don't need to fight these things, they're super big and super murdery and our mission is to _get_ the things, not _kill_ the things. I'm gonna get our relic. Weiss, stay here and watch the Nevermore in case we need another shield. Jade, um, keep distracting it and pleasepleasepleaseplease don't die?"

"I won't die," Jade says. "I'll... I'll be more careful." She looks both guilty and shell-shocked, ears still low on her head, which presumably signifies an emotion. Dogs must be using those for _something_ if they're always twitching around, right?

"You'd better be," you mutter, and wipe the last of the tears from your traitorous face.

 

* * *

 NJK **A**

* * *

 

Wow, giant scorpions _do not screw around!_ This is so cool. You _knew_ you'd find something exciting in that cave as soon as you saw the little drawings by the entrance, and your obvious wisdom sure paid off. If you hadn't done that you could have all killed the huge bird by now, and wouldn't _that_ have been a letdown!

Honestly, you're not sure how you'll kill this thing. You haven't burned any volcano rounds yet - hehe, _burned_ \- so that's clearly an option, but even those probably won't crack _this_ kind of armor, at least not without wasting them all. If you were going to use them you'd need to find the perfect spot to hit, and that big old stinger is making the job preeeetty tricky.

This Jaune kid is a ton of fun though, and he makes _great_ monster bait; you've gotten in so many shots and lashes that would've been impossible if he wasn't running around pathetically and keeping most of its attention. You're not sure why it's obsessing over him; maybe it's because he's so upset? These creatures are supposed to be attracted to negative emotion, and he is _terrified_ _beyond description_ as far as you can tell.

Unfortunately you think he's maybe going to get slaughtered as soon as he tires out, and that's going to be _very_ soon, especially since he only just now got his aura unlocked by the famous girl, which was _extremely_ weird and exhibitionistic, it was just great. You'd never seen that done before; apparently all your friends had to get various saucy personalities to help them out, but you basically just showed up already amazing.

So yeah, this is for sure going to end in him dead, and that means you won't be able to mess with him anymore, which would be a big loss! You're about to try to do something about it, but what's-her-name - Pyrrha, you think? You wonder if it's spelled that way; your bizarre instinctive knowledge of human language implies that it probably would be, and that means it works as an Alternian name, which is kind of neat. Anyway, Pyrrha beats you to it.

"Jaune, I'm going to attract its attention, and when I do, I want you to escape as safely as you can and then retrieve a relic for us." Pretty sound logic! You're not sure how she'll get that silly thing off him, but she seems _very_ good at doing things so she's probably got a decent plan. "I'm sorry to ask, but could someone accompany him? I'm concerned about that Nevermore changing targets."

Oh, you can totally do that. That means you'll get to be the one who loots your duo's relic, and you absolutely _live_ for looting old things from interesting places, even if this one is sort of artificial.

"I'll go! Just give the word." She seems surprised to hear you volunteer, then gives you a small but very earnest smile. Aww, that's kind of cute.

The scorpion follows Jaune through the grass in a wide arc. Kanaya has backed off, since the last time she struck at it she almost got stung, and Nepeta's regrouping after hacking a bit more flesh from some of its leg joints. When it's finally mostly facing all of you again, Pyrrha makes her move.

 _"Duck,"_ she commands, and when he does she hurls her spear with a small explosion that indicates it was, like everything else, probably also a gun. It's an excellent throw and it spikes right into one of the Grimm's really neat shiny red eyes; the creature hisses loudly enough that you almost expect it to vent scalding vaporized water. Just as you're thinking that was very cool but also very dumb on account of her using up her entire weapon, she rushes forward to grab it, and you'd aaaalmost swear you see it pull _itself_ out of the scorpion and fly back into her hand. _Hmm._

"Go, go!" Pyrrha blocks one of its claws with her shield, rides the force of the blow to help her hop out of the way of its descending stinger. She really earned her fame, didn't she? Jaune follows her direction and sprints toward the center of the ruin; you run along after him.

Off in the distance the big bird is shooting a fascinating number of feathers as if they were something much more normal, like a cholerbear's uvula spines, but they're blocked by a big wall of ice that blasts up out of the ground. Huh, who did _that?_ That's also real cool. Boy, this is just a _super fun planet,_ isn't it? You keep wondering if it'll ever get boring, but at this rate that honestly seems impossible.

When you make it to the main ruin, you find a big ring of pedestals, most of them just kind of sitting there all forlorn and plundered, a few still playing host to some neat little knick-knacks. You also find Jade's friend Ruby, who you haven't seen since that day you got tested! She is still very small and adorable and scythe-bearing, which is good to see.

"Hello! How's it going?" You give her a big wave. She startles, then waves back, her scythe bobbing around. Still a big fan of that aesthetic!

"Pretty awful! We're taking the relics and getting out of here because this is like really not good and it'd be really nice if nobody became super dead right in front of my eyes at all!"

"Aww, you sure? I wanted to have a good fight for once. That's fair, though, it's a little early to let any fun people get splattered and there's probably going to be at least one casualty if this crazy scene doesn't change somehow." You wouldn't actually mind _too_ much if someone got killed, as long as they had fun doing it, but you're not really lying, either. There's so much potential for alien shenanigans with these people!

"I for one would like to not die today," Jaune gasps out, trying to catch his breath and not really pulling it off. That's also fair!

Okay, relic time. What's left here? Oh, chess pieces, neat, it's been a while since you saw any of those. There's a black subjugglator, a white rook, a white knight, a black knight... Well, you're not a big fan of clowns at this point in your life, you like dark things, and there's a weird awkward little soft spot for musclebeasts left over from a long time ago, so you guess you'll grab the black knight. Meanwhile, Jaune swipes the white rook and Ruby confiscates the white knight.

"Okay," Ruby says, "Great! I think when we get back to our groups we should try to split up into two different big people clusters and go off sideways. That gives us pretty okay chances maybe hopefully! With six of us for each of them I think we can definitely get away and maybe even kill them if there's no other choice."

She's right, although you honestly think six people is a little _too_ good. Ruby's really underestimating how good people are at making monsters die, _especially_ you and your friends. That's okay, though. She couldn't have known.

... Huh. What's that noise?

"Do you hear that?" There's no way they don't, it's pretty noticeable even though you have close-to-human senses, but you never know when you might develop sudden-onset tinnitus in this line of work. Jaune slows his loud air noises down a little to listen; Ruby winces just a little bit.

"What _is_ that," she says, and then shoves Jaune to the ground as a big black blob whizzes by. You are pretty sure that would have smacked him right in the face.

Off in the distance you can see something moving - no, a couple of somethings, black and very fast, weaving through the trees. They are definitely in the same direction as that noise, which is still getting louder - oh, nope, huh, it stopped. Weird.

And then the globs start to fly. Wow those are fast, that is a lot! Big nasty slimy-looking hunks of who-knows-what are launching out of the woods in pretty significant numbers; Jaune manages to block one or two with his shield, hunkered low to the ground, and Ruby and you dodge without too much issue. The residue clings to Jaune's shield, sizzling and spreading a fascinatingly hideous stink.

"What the heck are - _look out!"_ Ruby starts to speak, and then her eyes go wide; she's looking at you, so you take the cue and drop to the ground.

This turns out to have been a really smart idea, because something big, dark, and almost musclebeast-like _blasts_ through the space you just cleared out, then slides to a very unnaturally smooth stop ten or fifteen feet away, circling around to face you again.

Ooh... it's an odd thing that's kind of like a color-inverted cervidae lusus, but not exactly? Four-legged and hoofed, with a very long and slender neck, eyes glittering like red jewels behind elegant armor plates, razor-sharp looking antlers that split into a tangle of spikes. It was trying to impale you on those, you think.

What's most interesting, though, is that those hooves are _completely silent_ , and actually you're not even sure it's leaving prints in the grass. That's definitely impossible, and also _very_ cool.

It opens its strange deer-like mouth and pukes up a huge blob of sizzling grossness like a squishy cannonball, which is also very cool, and _also-_ also looks extremely deadly. You roll to the side and let it burn through the grass instead of your soft alien flesh.

"What _is_ that thing?", Jaune says, in more or less the same confused voice he uses for everything. Then a very different voice pops up behind you.

"I'll tail you what that is," Nepeta says, the toothy grin on her face completely audible even though you aren't looking. "It's _purrey."_

 _"Yessss,"_ you reply, and give a thumbs-up to the area in general. The Grimm huffs silently, shakes its head with a slight annoying ringing sound, and then breaks into an eerie silent gallop, disappearing back into the trees a good fifty feet away in roughly a single second.

"A-ray-dia, I'm going to go sniff out Kanaya! It would be super useful if you could net Jade for me. She's not allowed to flounder any longer! She is my partner and it will be impawsible to work with her if we don't get some practfish." Hmm! It's extremely not her place to tell you to do anything, but she's very precious when she's all focused like this, so you'll go along with her for now.

"Okay, but you owe me!"

"Shore, waterever! We are going to gut those little deer-fishies, because today is dumb and they look _furry_ weird and fun. Everymoby else can... I don't reely care what they do, actshoally! Whoefur wants to have a good time can come along."

"I think I am going to go back and find my partner? There's a big scary bird and also that is where Jade is and I want to make sure she's still breathing and not a corpse!" Ruby turns to leave, then stops and gives you both a long, interesting look. "If she goes with you... keep her safe, okay?"

Nepeta rolls her eyes, and you finally accept that lying around in the grass, while comfortable, is not conducive to retrieving anyone for your hunting adventure.

"I won't let my partner get eaten, duh. Don't mako this weird."

Ruby nods and then disappears into a streak of rose petals, which is absolutely not something you expected a human body to do. You wonder if she realizes you have to kind of just follow her, since you're both going to the same place? She's awfully worried about Jade. You'd better keep an eye on those two, you have a feeling they might get _real_ cute someday.

"Uh... what about me?" Jaune is standing up now, staring at the trees where the blobs were coming from. He looks pretty lost, although so far that does seem to be his default status.

"Go find your partner, silly!"

His partner, interestingly enough, seems to have moved waaaay across the ruins to start shooting at the bird, which does make sense; she's one of the people who's most equipped to hit it, after all. Kanaya is still busy failing to chainsaw the scorpion, which she's also lead over toward the bird, maybe on purpose and maybe by accident; she keeps trading places with Yang, who looks convinced that punching it in the anywhere enough times will eventually do something different for some reason.

Wow. This is some serious chaos! You are _in your element._

Nepeta bounds off after Ruby, still in Jade's general direction. You guess you'd better catch up already! Hopefully everyone can agree on how to divvy up the boss fights. You are _so_ ready for a good boss fight right about now.

Ohh yes, this is going to be _fun._


	33. Sound and Furry (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder that the fic has a blog at lionhearted.tumblr.com ! Check it out for fanart, updates on chapters-in-progress, and more recently the first few posts in the World of Lionhearted series, where I go into detail on some worldbuilding stuff. So far there are two posts about how aura functions in this fic, and they're both actually pretty important information from a mechanical and character standpoint, so I'd highly recommend checking them out!

_oh, in the calm before the storm_

_another legend will be born_

_another battle will be won_

_we will rise_

 

[disturbed - immortalized](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Auuqlcom6tM)

 

* * *

 ... ?? JN **P** R ?? ...

* * *

 

Well, today has become rather intense, hasn't it? You've managed to partner with exactly who you wanted, which is _wonderful,_ but you've also discovered that he is... hmm... well, as combat partners go, he may be a bit of a _project._ Meanwhile, you've met a lot of other... er... _interesting_ people, and become stranded in a large field with two utterly massive Grimm. Perhaps _more;_ you've caught glimpses of odd things out there in the trees.

At least the Nevermore mostly attacks in strafing runs, with rather long breaks in between. It gives you just enough time to think and regroup.

Off to the side, the girl in all red - the _smaller_ one, not Aradia - appears in a whirlwind of what seem to be rose petals, scanning her surroundings in a slight panic until she catches sight of the white-earned Faunus with the battle rifle and the pale girl with the rapier. Her partner and a friend, perhaps?

"Weiss! Nepeta wants to split off from the group because she likes hunting deer or something, so we have to figure out what we're doing!" The white-haired girl, Weiss you suppose - a fitting name - turns to glare at her, though you suppose she's been glaring every time you saw her, so maybe that's just how she is.

"Who?! Oh never mind. You seem to have taken charge, _Ruby,_ so what do you suggest?" She all but spits her partner's (?) name; that seems like more of a challenge than a genuine request. You feel a bit sorry for Ruby, if that's the case.

"I - oh hi!" Ruby startles and then waves to Aradia, who's arrived very suddenly. "What's up?"

"Where's Jade - oh, hey there!" So the white-eared Faunus is Jade, then. This is a lot of names to track all at once. In any case, she appears to have bolted for Ruby the instant she saw her, and as a result is now much closer to everyone else. "Nepeta asked me to find you! She wants you to come over and help us hunt these super neat cervidae Grimm that keep spitting stuff at us. Apparently you need 'practfish' working together?" She winks along with the inexplicable pun.

 _"Ugh,"_ Jade says. Her ears tilt noticeably forward. "What is her issue with me today? Fine, I'll go help. Just - well..." She turns to Ruby, her expression softening. "Be careful, okay, Ruby? If you get killed I'll be so mad at you!"

"I will not get killed! I'm actually really good at not dying, mostly, even getting my guts almost ripped out didn't kill me so y'know -" Jade's ears fall all the way against her head and her eyes widen - "Uh, forget I said that! Just go before the Nevermore comes back!"

"Okay," Jade breathes. "Okay. I - yeah. Good luck." Then she's running off across the field again, back toward whoever her partner actually is. It's becoming increasingly impossible to figure out just who's tied to who in this situation.

"Great!" Aradia says; you have no idea why she's so cheerful right now, but it's probably for the best that _someone_ is managing not to panic. "I'm gonna go grab my friends! You have fun, pupas!" She winks again and then she's off toward the Deathstalker before you have time to wonder what in the world she's talking about. That creature is extremely resilient, isn't it? The blonde and black-haired girls are still pounding on it with various weapons, along with the chainsaw girl, and they've hardly slowed it down.

"Pyrrha!" A much more familiar and _much_ more winded voice. Jaune, sweat streaming down his face, stumbles to a stop at your side, almost doubling over in an attempt to get enough air. He... really has to work on his stamina. "Hey, uh, everything keeps getting even crazier, and I think people are trying to form up into different groups?"

Right now you're all just randomly trading places, really, though you suppose everyone has their own objectives in doing so. The Nevermore is in the process of being distracted by grenades and small-arms fire from the girl in pink and the boy in green, and they could really use some help.

"What do we do?", Jaune asks, and you feel as though you've received an electric shock.

It's up to you to make the call, isn't it? Ruby and Weiss both appear torn on how to proceed, but there is _no time_ for all of you to hesitate. It won't be long before something goes wrong, before someone dies. This chaos isn't resolving itself until a final decision is made. You can't wait for everyone else to decide their own courses of action without your input any longer.

There's no one bigger and stronger to save you from your hesitance this time around.

 

* * *

**A memory of four years ago, in a village somewhere on Anima...**

 

 _You still remember it like it was yesterday. Most likely you always will; if you think about it, it would only make sense to so clearly preserve the day you stopped being a girl who wanted to become a Huntress because it was the next step in a fighter's journey, and became a girl who truly_ wanted _to dedicate her life to the people._

_It was supposed to be just one stop on a tour promoting... something. How odd that you've forgotten the precise reason you were there in the first place? You've been the face of so many products that most of them have blended together now._

_Whatever the reason, what matters is that n_ _o one expected the Grimm that day_ _._ _It's easy to forget that_ _even a large_ _and well-defended_ _town can come under sudden attack_ _. That was the first time you saw them with your own eyes, in person: like shadows given form, a mindless rage against all humans, all Faunus, made fully manifest._

 _You were terrified... but you_ had _to fight. Being a fighter was all you had, all you ever expected to have. It was not even something you thought of as a responsibility; it was simply what you_ _were good for._

 _Where things differed from your expectations, however, was when several other children attempted to take up arms from the fallen and accompany you into the fray. They must have been fans of yours; civilians with no idea of the training necessary to do real battle, let alone what was necessary for_ children _to be capable of it._

 _You knew you should have tried to stop them... but you were afraid_ _to take charge. Afraid to tell them what you knew was the best option: to run, to let you handle this._ _For the first time in your life, you could feel the spectre of death looming, you were filled with the terrible understanding that your story might just..._ end. _And so_ _... you hesitated until it was too late to_ _stop them_ _, until the weight of their enthusiasm was too much to resist._ _You let them come, all because you were selfish_ _,_ _b_ _ecause you_ _didn't want to have to make the decision to go it alone._

_The Grimm felt less like monsters and more a force of nature, numbering in the hundreds, a pitch black tide of destruction, and as soon as you began to engage them, as your fear and that of the other children began to attract more than merely a few stragglers, you realized the true depth of your mistake, your failure._

_Even if you managed to survive this... you would be the only one._

_"What do we do?!" One of the kids, clearly about to cry. You froze up. You couldn't help it. They somehow thought_ you _would know what to do, and you should have, shouldn't you? So you froze, and when the_ _beowolves came, you weren't fast enough._

 _But that was when your luck - no, your_ destiny _\- turned to guide you down a wiser path. That was_ _when, against all odds, a savior came for you. It was your first time meeting a_ true _Huntsman. Not an amateur, not a student, not merely someone with the title who you might have observed at higher levels of competition._ _... but a hero._

 _His red cape billowed in the howling wind_ _. He moved like nothing you had ever seen, seeming to move yards with every step, his broken sword_ _blurring in and out of sight with every swing._ _The Grimm that had been mere feet away were less than mincemeat, and then, i_ _n the face of that river of death_ _,_ _he made himself_ _into_ _a dam_ _._

 _"Y'all keep the hell back," he said, and how silly that you were started to hear someone swear. "This ain't some Chuck E. Cheese arcade game. We're in_ _it deep now_ _,_ _Charlie's comin' through the trees and the_ _re ain't_ _a Huey in sight_ _._ _"_

 _You didn't understand what he was saying. To be honest, you still don't. But his stream of nonsense felt so authoritative that it took hold anyway_ _, and t_ _he rest of the children ran back for shelter. Perhaps you should have run, too, but..._

 _After seeing him fight, all you could think was_ 'I want to be like him.' _All you could think was that you didn't want to be one of the children. You wanted to act like the warrior you were supposed to become._

 _"_ _Let me fight with you!" you shouted_ _, in that brief lull between the waves of death. "I'm... I'm not a child!_ _This is my_ destiny!" _What a stupid thing to say; of course you were. His expression, or rather his utter lack of one, made it clear that he knew that far better than you did. But he must have seen something in your eyes, or your stance, or_ _somehow believed your absurd assertion_ _, because after a brief stare, he simply nodded and turned back to the battle._

 _The two of you_ _likely_ _only fought for a few minutes, but it felt like hours, like the Grimm would never stop coming. You knew the world was filled with them_ _,_ _that they outnumbered humanity to a ridiculous degree_ _,_ _a_ _nd yet until that day, that moment, you hadn't_ felt _the insignificance of your species_ _in the face of that ceaseless army of darkness._

 _... But it_ wasn't _ceaseless, and though you were tired, battered, aching,_ _ashamed of your lack of tenacity by comparison to his unwavering resolve, the battle did finally come to an end, and though the streets were ruined and empty, though there was no one to cheer for you, you had_ won _._

 _Your agent found you not long after_ _, and the Huntsman was gone_ _the moment you took your eyes off him,_ _as though he had never been there at all. You assumed, somehow, that you would never see him again; that he'd just vanished into the evening like a ghost._

 _Later that night_ _, at the town's largest inn, he_ _found you_ _warm_ _ing yourself by the fire_ _, and he told you what your mistake had been._

 _It wasn't that you had gone to fight, even if you_ were _a child. It was that you had let others follow you into danger when you knew they weren't prepared_ _... and that_ you _weren't prepared, either_ _. That_ _if you really believed it was your destiny to be a fighter, you had to be ready to sacrifice yourself in the place of people who couldn't protect themselves._ _You_ _had to be someone who wouldn't hesitate to make the right choice_ _._

 _He didn't blame you_ _,_ _d_ _idn't think you were stupid. If it had been any other way, you might not have listened. But he treated you like an_ equal _in need of guidance, not a child to be corrected_ _; he knew that being thirteen years old didn't mean you couldn't fight,_ _and that was what made all the difference._

 _That man, more than anyone or anything else, taught you what it really means to be a hero: it means to lead when no one else will, to understand that there is no glory in being what you are, only the duty to offer yourself up for the sake of those you were meant to defend._ _To never_ _freeze up_ _when lives_ _are_ _on the line._

 _The Huntsman told you not to_ want _this. That you still had the chance to turn back and live a normal life. But you couldn't, wouldn't; this was all you had, all you would ever have, and besides, how could you possibly discard a dream when it was so newly born?_

 _A dream is a powerful thing_ _;_ _every bit as_ _powerful_ _as_ _destiny. And from that moment on,_ _you had one. You would not_ _follow the only path you understood simply because you had nothing else_ _, simply because it was destiny_ _._ _You would_ _also_ _follow it because you had a_ dream.

 _That_ _dream was to be a Huntress. To protect the weak, to lead the lost_ _and frightened_ _._

_To be a hero like him._

 

* * *

**Back in the present**

 

"If we're forming groups then we should be clear about it," you say. "Wandering all over the field is getting us nowhere. Those four are clearly going to stick together, so the rest of us should split up evenly and pull our respective targets apart. Having all of us in one place is advantageous in a few ways, but we can't risk both of those Grimm focusing on the same targets, and that's sure to happen eventually."

"... Yeah," he says. "That - that makes sense. So who's fighting what?"

That's a good question. As far as you can tell, no matter how you split your group up, there are options for balance; the blonde and the pink-haired girl are clearly heavy hitters, you and Ruby can fight at both long and short range, the black-haired girl and the boy in green both appear to be actual ninjas, Weiss is clearly a dust specialist and would do well anywhere, Jaune is... hmm. Jaune...

... Well, he's not vulnerable enough to entirely counterbalance the benefit that you - likely the most skilled person present - bring to whatever group you're in.

The group that would have the widest skill-set would probably be the blonde, the black-haired girl, Ruby, and Weiss. You feel relatively confident that you can make up for any weaknesses in your own.

"Ruby," you say. She startles and looks your way; you point to the blonde and the black-haired girl. "Do you think you can work well with those two?"

"That's my sister and a friend, so yeah, for sure!" Oh, that's extremely lucky. That only reinforces your decision. "Come on, Weiss! Let's go kill a big bug!"

"Arachnids are not _bugs,"_ her partner mutters, and then they're off to solidify their group.

"You two! I'm sorry, I haven't caught your names?" You have to wave a bit to get their attention, but the girl in pink and boy in green fire a few more shots into the air and respond.

"Nora Valkyrie!" The girl gives some kind of salute for reasons you don't entirely comprehend. Well, she's not lacking in enthusiasm, and that can only be a good thing.

"Lie Ren," the boy says, much more quietly. They do seem to be partners, and assuming they are, they're probably excellent foils for one another, given that everything you've seen of him has been calm and controlled.

"Everyone else has split off into groups, so the Nevermore is now our responsibility. What are your weapons and abilities? I mean, I've seen them," you say, suddenly embarrassed now that all eyes are on you, "but it would be nice to have more details."

"This is Magnhild! She's a grenade launcher _and_ a giant hammer. If I can hit that bird even once, I'm sure I can break _something_ important. Ren, tell her your deal!" You were certainly right to see her as the heavy-hitter, then; hopefully she isn't exaggerating. Ren nods, so you suspect he has reason to take her seriously.

"My pistols are simple, but effective. They don't transform, but I am able to deal sufficient damage with their blades as they are. I can also throw them in an arc and catch them again fairly reliably." Hmm... He'd probably be very useful for precision damage. If you can create an opportunity, he could deal much more damage throwing those blades than you would with rifle ammunition.

"Do you think you could throw far enough to damage one of its eyes?" You don't think you'll be landing any significant blows without disabling it in some way first.

"Uh guys, it's on its way back!" Jaune is obviously trying not to panic. It's hard to blame him, considering the scale of your opponent, but losing control of himself will only get him killed more quickly.

"Only if I could get closer first," Ren says. That's less than ideal, but... there are ways to close that gap.

In the meantime, though...

"We scatter on three. If you can shoot it, do, but focus on evasion. One... Two... _Three!"_

The Nevermore descends in an enraged black blur, tearing massive ruts in the earth as you all attempt to clear out of its path. If you could take advantage of that height decrease it would be perfect, but at the speed it moves, you don't think that's feasible, and each time it's dove this way it pulls back up as soon as it realizes it's missed.

Its thick coat of feathers seem to just shrug off Ren's machine pistols, and Nora's grenades aren't landing solidly enough to do any real damage even though she's clearly leading her shots with a degree of skill. You already know your rifle won't fare any better.

The upside to the situation is that the terrain is stable; you're fairly sure that all of you can continue dodging most of its attacks. Given that it's going to be harder to kill it than to endure it, running seems like a strong option... but if you try to escape, you'll almost certainly be shredded by feathers from behind or lifted into the air and devoured. The trees aren't sufficient cover from its sight and those feathers will cut through solid wood as easily as they nearly anything else.

If you can't do worthwhile damage from far away _or_ deliver any stronger blows when its altitude is low, wouldn't your best option be finding a way to _increase_ your own? There are ways that could be managed. In fact... If you could hit it with a precise attack somehow, stun it, and then...

You have an idea. A crazy, stupid, all-or-nothing idea, but it's more than you had before, and somehow you think that craziness and heroism might go hand in hand anyway. If they'll trust you and they have the skills they ought to, this will work.

"Okay!", you call out. "I have a plan."

 

* * *

**One bad idea later**

 

They each react differently, once they've heard what you have in mind. Nora seems to love it, particularly with the role you've given her. Ren just sighs and nods; there's a long-suffering cast to his features that makes you think he's used to doing extremely stupid things. Jaune, on the other hand...

"There's gotta be more I can do... right?"

He sounds so _hopeful._ You hate it, but the reality is that he's just not very valuable as a combatant, not yet at least. All you can do for now is try to drive home that his role _does_ matter, even if it's not the most glamorous or vital.

Actually... maybe there _is_ one more thing. You don't care for it, but if he's determined to be as much a part of this as possible, then...

You tell him. He goes pale; you think he might be tired of being bait.

He agrees to do it anyway.

 

* * *

 

The next time the Nevermore comes around, you're ready, or at least as ready as you can be. Jaune, for what it's worth, takes to his unfortunate first task with a kind of frantic, terrified enthusiasm, breaking away from the rest of you to run through the grass, yelling and banging his sword against his shield. You're not actually sure if it's the noise he's making or the _fear_ he must be radiating that attracts your target, but either way, it works; the enormous bird focuses its attention entirely on him.

"Hee hee, this is fun! Usually _I'm_ the one giving piggy-back rides!" Nora, from behind you, sounding like she couldn't be happier. At least she has a good attitude about all of this. You can hear Ren breathing hard under the strain of keeping upright while she clings to him.

"Alright," you say. "On three again." Putting Miló away, you take hold of Akoúo̱ with both hands, brace your shoulders as best you can, adjust your stance. The Nevermore will be on Jaune in seconds.

"One... two... _three!"_

This is going to take every bit of focus you can manage, and as you hear Ren's running footsteps and then the pained grunt when he leaps into the air, you pour your consciousness inward, dim your perceptions until all that exists in your mind's eye is your arms and the cool metal of the shield they support.

You envision tension and kinetic energy building inside and around Akoúo̱, feel your aura turning black and humming with power...

Then Ren lands on top of your shield with the heavy _thump_ of both his weight and his partner's. You _shove_ upward as hard as you can, release all of that dammed-up intent skyward, and launch them both as high as possible.

The Nevermore doesn't even notice, focused as it is on either shredding or devouring your partner - you're not sure which yet, and it's not sure either, apparently. The Huntsman-and-Huntress stack ascends majestically enough that it's difficult to track their precise height, but it must be at least forty or fifty feet. You hope it's enough.

Near the apex of the jump, Ren hurls one of his pistols, sending it whirring through the air toward the side of the Nevermore's head; still not looking, it's caught completely off guard when the little blade buries itself in its eye. It lets loose a horrifying, tree-shaking scream, floundering in midair for a few precious seconds while Nora, at the very apex of Ren's upward motion, uses him like a platform to make an impressively massive leap of her own, forward and up in a masterful arc toward the enraged bird.

Ren is sent hurtling toward the ground, where you rush to intercept him and mitigate the damage from his fall. Nora streaks across the morning sky, triggers some mechanism inside her hammer; it vents the pink flame and smoke of one of her strange grenades and sends her into a violent spin on a collision course with the Nevermore.

The bird sees her coming and manages to cover its head with its wing, but her astounding impact is still more than enough. You almost wince as its wing cracks, the horrible sound of splintering bone echoing across the field, and it tumbles end over end toward the ground.

You catch Ren without too much trouble, and honestly his landing seems to hurt him more than you even though you absorb most of the force. There's no time to worry, so you set him down and chase after the falling bird. Nora claimed she would be 'just fine on her own,' and if her partner is willing to trust her on that, then so are you.

The ground actually trembles when the Nevermore hits in a massive plume of dust, dirt, and torn-up grass. It thrashes from side to side, sending out waves of wind and grit, but the next assault comes from its front, the one side it can't particularly defend.

Jaune drives his sword into its remaining eye with both hands, and the Grimm screams again, even louder now that it's so close, slams its head into the grass hard enough to send him rolling and clanking at least twenty feet away... but there's not much else it can do, now. Its only option is to squirm and await execution.

(Somewhere behind you, Nora smacks into the earth with nothing more than a loud _'oof_ _._ _'_ What is that girl _made_ of?)

You take Miló back into your hands, step as close as you can without endangering yourself too severely, wait for the right moment, and then slit the Nevermore's throat, jamming the blade at least twelve inches into its thick flesh. The momentum of its own flailing does most of the work for you.

The rest of your ad-hoc hunting party slowly forms up behind you. Someone is clapping excitedly, probably Nora; Jaune and Ren stop just within your field of vision, waiting for the beast to finish its death throes so they can retrieve their weapons.

"... That was a lot easier than I expected," you say.

"Yeah, because we're _awesome!_ _"_ Nora is definitely endearing in her enthusiasm. You can't help but smile. She might even be right, considering everyone somehow played their parts more or less perfectly, even Jaune, who incidentally is staring at you, out of breath and vaguely awe-struck for some reason.

You took control of the situation, you used the resources at your disposal as well as you could, and most importantly, no one was hurt. It feels as though this was some kind of test, not so much by the school, which of course it technically was, but maybe by the world or the universe, and... you think you might have passed.

It's silly, but you can't help but think of the Huntsman from all those years ago. If he saw you now, would he be proud, you wonder? You hope so.

If nothing else, you think that just this once, it might be okay for you to be proud of _yourself._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #today in 'people who've already been changed by their exposure to Homestucks'  
> (dave strider making inexplicable references to the vietnam war will always be my favorite thing)


	34. Sound and Furry (3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com with fanart, updates on writing progress, and extra setting info!
> 
> Don't thank me for this chapter. Thank Diet Coke and the beautiful bounty of caffeine hidden within it.

_this is game time, an insane time, let the madness fly_

_show them strength that just can't be denied_

_find the power to devour, let the beast inside now be woken_

 

[disturbed - immortalized](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Auuqlcom6tM)

 

* * *

NJK **A**

* * *

 

This cervidae-ish Grimm is _really_ fast! Tracking it through the woods is actually pretty tricky, and it probably would've lost you by now if the rest of your team couldn't smell it, since it makes almost no noise at all. Even Jade and Kanaya can't hear it, apparently.

What's interesting, though, is that it's _running._ As far as you know, Grimm are supposed to be pretty focused on killing humans and Faunus, to the point of stupidity with a lot of types, but this thing is leading you all on a merry little chase. You guess some of them might have more of a sense of self-preservation! Who knew?

"This way!" Jade, off somewhere to your left. Dang, when you lost track of it last you would've sworn it was to the right. Is it really _that_ fast? Her rifle barks - hehe - a few times, but you doubt she actually hit anything with it, not with so much cover everywhere.

"Over here," Kanaya calls out, off to the right. Okay, no, that's dumb, it _can't_ be that fast. Which means... uh oh. That's not great. If no one else has figured it out, you'd better warn them sooner than later.

"I think there's more than one of them!"

Just as you say that, you hear something behind you, the rustle of a single leaf, and you instinctively veer to the side just as one of the things glides past you, missing by so little that it almost grazes your arm. You fire off a couple of bullets, but neither of them actually lands on the Grimm, which silently skids to a halt and then dashes off into the trees again.

You've kind of lost sight of your friends, but you can hear Kanaya cursing and the sound of sizzling black stuff splattering onto the terrain. They seem to be alternating their attacks to keep you off-balance. Smart little critters, aren't they?

"Keep swimming! Stick together and find some open waters!"

Okay, you assume that means you're looking for another clearing now. Following the Grimm into the woods seemed like fun but was, in retrospect, definitely not a good idea. Even Nepeta is having trouble and she should be at her best in this environment.

You keep weaving through the trees, trying not to completely lose anyone by following various shouts and weapon noises, ducking black spitballs whenever they come your way and keeping a close watch on every direction at once to avoid ambushes. Well, you can't really do that last thing perfectly, but you can sure try!

"I've found a clearing!" Kanaya, who is coming through a little garbled since her chainsaw is so dang loud. You change course and try to rendezvous wherever she is. It's farther than you expected! Her voice must really carry when she wants it to.

There is indeed a clearing, although it's not nearly as big as the one by the ruins, probably no more than seventy feet in any direction. A stream runs through it, almost perfectly centered, and that could turn out to be a problem for you _or_ the Grimm depending on who gets herded in what direction. This could get interesting.

Once everyone's kind of grouped up, there isn't much to do but let the monsters come to you! Everyone sort of naturally spreads out, keeping watch in different directions; it's nice that no one had to _tell_ anybody to do something that basic. You're working with some acceptable murderers for sure!

"Ocray," Nepeta says, "These things are furry quick, so anyfin anybody can do to slow them down would be purrfect. Moby the water could get in their way... Oh! Aradia, you have those exploding bullets, right?"

"Yep! They're called _volcano rounds,_ though. You have to say it right, it's cooler that way."

"Shore, whatefur, exploding bullets. If you blew up the sea floor in front of one, maybe you could capsize it and someone else could go in for the krill." Hmm! She's pretty good at thinking on her feet. It does make sense, though; hunting things is pretty much the single thing she was always best at apart from shipping her friends.

"Can do." You need to reload soon anyway, so you slip two volcano rounds in with the other bullets. No reason to only prepare one, these Grimm are fast enough that you still might mess up your first shot.

All of a sudden, you're all being bombarded by spit from three different directions, which at least helps answer the question of how many there could be. It's kind of an intense crossfire, sidestepping one glob only to almost walk into the path of another one; Jade is struggling with it, you're doing okay, Kanaya keeps knocking them away with her chainsaw - _cheater_ \- and Nepeta's having such an easy time that it's almost annoying to watch.

Finally the spit concentrates from two directions, which you figure probably means... _yep!_ There comes one barreling into the open to try to run down Kanaya. You think you can make the shot and there's no time to second-guess anything, so you plant a juicy explosion in between her and the Grimm.

It rears up, hissing weirdly quietly as chunks of half-molten rock spray up into its face, and Kanaya wastes no time lunging forward with that crazy rainbow-drinker-like speed she can still pull off somehow, sawing through its front legs with her chainsaw and then savagely chopping its head right off with a second strike.

"Nice! That was super efficient!" You'd give her a thumbs-up, too, if both your hands weren't full of death implements. This is going really well so far. Nobody's even gotten hurt yet; in fact, you bet you can all get through this unscathed. There probably aren't even any deadly surprises in wait for you.

... You hope that was enough to jinx you properly. It'd be a shame if this actually ended up being easy!

 

* * *

NJ **K** A

* * *

 

Well, as frustrating as it is having no way of confronting these creatures at range, your newly-assigned partner is proving herself to be useful. It isn't as though you were ever under any delusion that Aradia Megido of all people would be an unskilled fighter, but it _was_ difficult to imagine how on Alternia you'd be able to work well with her.

You should say 'on Remnant,' you suppose. The thought sours your briefly improved mood. At least your kill was relatively satisfying. You'll just have to take what you can get, emotionally. As usual.

"Um, guys? That one looks like a problem." Harley sounds genuinely concerned, which doesn't count for _too_ much considering her comparatively low exposure to horrifying monsters in her life, but it does warrant a look.

Three of the creatures have deigned to wander into the clearing, positioning themselves oddly brazenly across the way from your little band of idiots. One of those three is easily twice the size of the others; not counting its veritable forest of strange horns, it must be at least ten feet tall. It's considerably more armored, as seems typical of the older 'leader'-type Grimm that seem to plague every species, but there's no other obvious difference, at least not from your initial visual assessment.

Just as you're thinking that, it stretches its body out uncomfortably far, raises its head even higher; make that more like twelve feet tall, now. Then, as the other two simply watch you, not even spitting, as Jade and Aradia are training their firearms on your targets, the large cervidae begins to shake its head.

At first it's just _strange._ Then it speeds up, faster and faster, jerking and twitching wildly enough to blur before your eyes, and its horns tremble and vibrate from the force of it, the bizarre motions.

This is where that ugly sound was coming from: its _horns_ , ringing at some impossible frequency. The sound is piercing, grotesque, and getting louder at a rapid pace. You would very much like for it to stop, and are about to charge the damned thing to _make_ it stop, but you find that you just... can't. Your legs aren't working the way they should, your knees are shaking and going weak, and even though you're staring straight ahead you feel as though the world is spinning around you.

It hurts your ears, all four of them in fact, though the bat ones are affected infinitely worse, and you're startled to feel grass under your shins; you are apparently no longer standing. You drop your chainsaw to try to cover the stupid fuzzy things and barely hear your weapon thump to the ground, buzzing impotently. That sound is so _large,_ so all-encompassing, it's hard to even think about anything else but the ringing, like a thousand bells struck over and over and over and over inside your head, infinite daymarish echoes.

You drop to all fours, letting go of your ears. It hardly affects your perception of the ringing, and your hands come away sticky with bright red alien blood. None of your senses seem to be operating correctly anymore and it _hurts,_ all the world is pain resonating down from your ravaged auricular sponges.

The disorientation is so intense now that you feel like you're twirling around in a husktop station chair as fast as you possibly can, except that it's so much _faster_ than that could ever be and there's nothing you can do to slow it down. Your digestive tract is churning with the imaginary motion; you somehow manage to tilt your head just enough to see Jade curled into a ball, bleeding from her dogs ears as well, before you vomit up last night's scant dinner and quite a bit of your own digestive fluids. It stinks, burns, tastes hideous, but even so it pales in comparison to the incredible torture of that goddamned _sound._

Somewhere deep inside yourself, a ragged wisp of alarm suggests that the smaller Grimm are surely planning to use this opportunity to attack, but it's hard to translate that concept into any sort of action. This... is not good.

This is not good _at all._

* * *

N **J** KA

* * *

 

Oh god, it _hurts!_ Everything hurts, at first it was just your dog ears and then it was your regular ears and now it's hard to even tell what's actually hurting and what isn't because it's so intense that there's no room to feel anything else. Even so, it looks like Kanaya got the worst of it; her hearing is probably the best out of anybody's and even curled up on the ground like you are you can see her bleeding and puking.

You are so mad at Nepeta for dragging you into this stupid hunt. Why couldn't you just have taken your dumb relics and gone back to the school? Why was _this_ necessary?! Okay, you should probably be prioritizing something other than pain and resentment toward your jerk friend, but that would require your brain to be at all operable and it seems like that's just not in the cards.

Ugh! If you get killed by some creepy deer with horror-movie time lapse photography heads, you are _never forgiving Nepeta Leijon,_ even if she finds you in some weird alternate-universe afterlife and begs for it.

Something snags your dress up by the shoulder, digs into skin and muscle, and honestly it's hard enough to decode what you're feeling that you can't tell if it's stabbing you or just poking really hard. You barely feel yourself move, caught up in all the dizziness, but your view of the world swivels as you flop over and something big and black zooms overhead.

Then you go crashing down into the grass, and the shock is enough that you can kind of halfway think again, just for a second, just enough to see Aradia rolling off in another direction, tearing up the grass with the force of it. _That_ can't be good.

You're not completely sure, but you think she might have just yanked you away from a charging monster and gotten trampled for it. She struggles to her feet, which is kind of impressive before you remember that her hearing isn't all that much better than a human's; obviously the noise is hurting her too, but it's not as bad as it is for you bonus-ear types. Her sword whip is stuck in the ground at a sharp angle, but she's held on to the revolver.

She aims it, trying to keep it steady with both hands, and there's a bright and completely inaudible flash accompanied by a streak of red-brown light like a tracer. One of her special exploding bullets, you guess. When it comes to special ammo, you _know_ you've got her beat, but you have to admit hers is a lot easier to use.

The ringing doesn't _disappear_ exactly, but something about it changes, the potency drops away, and you manage to wrangle your brain into something close enough to working order to watch the giant deer stumble around with shards of white-orange heated rock sticking out of its armor plates. That's weird... it's not shaking its head, but the ringing is still partially there. How does that... oh. Oh, that _sucks._

You're pretty sure that the real sound is actually gone now, but your ears are so messed up that your brain thinks you can still hear it. Wow, this had better be temporary. You can feel blood matting your hair and dripping down the sides of your head; it's gross and basically just super concerning. What if you're deaf forever now, just like that? That would kind of suck!

Aradia seems to still be shooting at things, although with normal bullets; you grab Continuum with shaking hands and force yourself upright even though your legs are still all screwy. Kanaya isn't doing great but she's stopped puking and that's a step up, you guess? Nepeta is... _ooh,_ that's _cool._

She said she'd given her claws a new feature, but you didn't expect _this;_ no wonder she spent so much of her time and money working on them. They've actually detached from the main bands of the bracers, clicked together, straightened and spaced themselves out a bit, telescoped out a long central shaft. Now she's carrying a thin double-ended trident.

Okay, you're still mad at her, but you have to give her credit: she _is_ imaginative. You didn't know she could fight with something like that! It must be left-over knowledge from her time as a sprite. She doesn't actually talk about that much, you get the feeling it makes her sad, but you do know she was fused with the fish girl for a while and that's why her stupid puns are as much about the ocean as they are about cats.

She jogs over to you while Aradia covers her, weaving past one of the deer when it tries to charge her, and you only realize she's trying to _talk_ to you when she puts a hand on your shoulder and shakes you to get your attention. You glare at her and point to your ears; does she seriously think you can hear her when your hearing organs are _bleeding everywhere?_

Nepeta pokes the barrel of your gun with one finger and uses the hand holding her double-trident to pantomime extending it into its secondary mode, or at least you _think_ that's what she means. If she means something else, you sure don't know what the heck it could be. She points at the gun, then at the stream in the middle of the clearing; when you look at her in confusion she rolls her eyes and does it again, flicking her tail impatiently.

The other deer are still attacking Aradia and Kanaya; poor Kanaya is up again and trying to fight, but neither of them can land a hit, and it doesn't seem like Aradia can find the time to reload with all the spit and high-speed ramming attacks. Nepeta draws yet another line from your gun to the stream, throws her hands out in the vague universal gesture for 'boom.'

 _Ohh._ That's... actually pretty smart. You nod quickly, wincing at the pain that shoots through your skull, and you hope she's ready to cover you while you set things up.

You love this gun, you really do, but maybe after this is over you should tinker with it some more and try to figure out a way to morph and load it faster, because wow, this has turned out to be _incredibly_ impractical!

 

* * *

NJ **K** A

* * *

 

How you've managed to stand at all, you can hardly say, but here you are drunkenly chasing after the most infuriating Grimm in any universe, waving your silent chainsaw around like a jackass. It's better than continuing to vomit, you suppose.

Nepeta seems to have deserted her fellow ex-trolls to play charades with the ex-human, so it's up to you and Aradia to keep these damned things at bay, which is proving to be a task that's more than a little bit beyond you in your impaired state. Every few seconds the beasts rotate their roles between harrying you with their spit and attempting to impale you, only made worse by your discovery that they can walk on water like it was solid earth, and while the leader hasn't had the chance to stop and recreate the worst sound that has ever existed, it _is_ quite a bit bigger and faster than the others, which is not helping matters at all.

Jade seems to be transforming her weapon for some reason; Nepeta's done it to hers, but that at least makes _sense,_ seeing as it gives her a bit of badly-needed reach. What Jade is going to accomplish with that incredibly slow secondary mode, you can't imagine; if she was failing to land hits on the cervidae with an _agile_ firearm, there's no way she'll manage this.

The giant Grimm sets its sights on you again, and you're only barely able to twist out of its way, slicing at its flank as it passes. Just a graze. Damn. You're starting to run out of breath, but more importantly, after that audio assault you suspect you're running low on _aura,_ and if you wear yourself out completely in either regard, you're a dead woman.

Honestly, though... would that be so bad? Some dark part of you is asking the unsettling question: would you really even _care_ if you died? You think you'd prefer not to, but at this point, what's keeping you animate apart from spite? Rose has abandoned you, there's no sign whatsoever of Karkat, Strider is on the other side of the planet. Even in your own world you had very little to live for, considering your grand destiny of reviving your dead species was quite thoroughly obliterated by a hormonal fish boy's temper tantrum.

If the worst that can happen to you is death and the best that can happen is _nothing,_ there's not much to fear no matter what happens.

Sidestepping another charge by one of the little cervidae, you're just beginning to feel the full drag of this emotional desiccation when you're interrupted by a bright, searing pain blooming across your chest. You've finally miscalculated, and a glob of burning black goo has caught you dead in your center of mass.

Something slams into your back, knocking the wind out of you, and it takes you a moment of gasping for air and scraping at the hot sludge to realize it's the _ground;_ the projectile swept you off your feet and now you're prone all over again.

If anything, you feel... not exactly frightened, but _frustrated._ You feel _helpless._

You can't handle this, can you? You're going to be hit again, or stabbed again, and you probably won't even get to _die_ _,_ you'll just wake up somewhere unfamiliar, utterly humiliated, _cared for by strangers,_ reduced from a person who's retained some vague scrap of pride to a grotesquely useless and spiritually neutered _organism._ Just a lump of flesh that can't even _bandage_ herself. _That's_ all you're good for now, isn't it? Being an object of pity in the worst way, without a hint of romance, the absolute definition of _pathetic._

It has become significantly harder to breathe, and you don't think the phenomenon has anything to do with injury.

... No. No, no, _no,_ you will _not_ let that happen, you _cannot_ let that happen! You'll do anything to avoid it, you'll kill first, you'll die first, it doesn't matter, you'll do _anything but that._

You swallow the urge to throw up all over again and shove yourself upright, squeezing the handles of your chainsaw tightly enough that you'd be bruising your fragile human skin if not for this damned aura, and you're going to find a way out of this situation even if it ultimately means hurling yourself thorax-first onto those horns.

Trying to locate your 'friends' again, you finally get a clean view of the area just as Jade fires her enormous gun into the water for some reason. The enormous recoil knocks her over again and the clearing is bathed in bright green light for a split second before a huge wave of heat and force blasts out from the point of impact, followed quickly by an enormous gust of evaporated water that settles over the area like hot mist.

You can barely see, but neither can anything else, and you suspect that's the point.

Luckily _'barely'_ is still _something,_ because while the steam does obscure your view, you can still pick out the glowing heat-signatures of the Grimm stomping about in confusion. For a brief moment you wonder how in the world you're managing this, whether it's really just _heat_ that your vision is so sensitive to, but there is no other sensible explanation. You guess your weird alien anatomy is just that good.

The nearest cervidae doesn't see you coming at all, which makes it all the sweeter when you bite your chainsaw into its back from above, bearing down with one long beautiful sweep, relishing the feeling of flesh and bone giving way beneath your weapon's grinding teeth. Its front half and rear half separate cleanly, flopping forward and backward respectively.

God, there's nothing quite like bisecting something you despise to make you feel better about yourself when you're depressed.

Murder is an anodyne against existential despair in _any_ universe.

 

* * *

 **N** JKA

* * *

 

This whole orcadeal has you _furry_ tired and annoyed, and you are moray than ready for it to be over. That teribubble noise left you with a splitting haddock, but your dumb partner finally figured out what you wanted her to do and for once she actshoally _did it,_ and now that the area's become an ocean of blinding white steam, you can reel-y on a different sense to get the upper claw.

You can't _sea_ the Grimm, but you can smell the gross stinky tar. You yawl back your arm , try to pull together a solid mental pictshore of where their necks should be, and hurl your 2x3dent at one of the retched things.

There's a sharked gurgle and then a boatiful splattery thump. _Nice._ You sprint after your fresh kill and yank your weapon back out of its purrforated throat.

Even if half your fronds have their herring shot, you've got waves to pet by. Kanaya must have killed another one, if the chainsaw oaring and then the loud victory screech meant anything. So that just leaves the whale.

You're still hissed off about the big stupid tuna-ing fork on its head and you are _not_ letting it do that again. Its nasty head is all too easy to sniff out, but you remember there being a lot of hull plating in random spots, so you don't want to throw the 2x3dent again and have it bounce off; you collapse the mast and hook the claw blades back on your wrist bracers, track it through the dissipating mist, and when you can finally see it again, you don't waste any time.

One big pounce has you clinging to its underside like a barnacle. You jam your claws under one plate, pry it off, and then sink the blades in as deep as you can, over over while it hisses and thrashes around, chunks of black stuff coming loose every time you reel back out of its belly, splattering on the grass.

It falls, but it's still kicking, so you stomp on its throat and rip another plate off of _there_ , pier-ce right through with both sets of claws, and rip its head clean off, impaling it and raising it up to the sky with a primeel roar of satisfaction. _This_ is what you get for trying to make _Nepeta Leijon_ into prey! This is what happens when a sad little shark forgets it's the hunted and tries to be the hunter!

When the steam is finally gone and evermoby can see that you've won, Jade pumps her fisht in the air, Aradia breams and yells _'Whoo! Alternians represent!'_ , and Kanaya just sighs and flops on her butt.

If the school's not seine you in a pawsitive light after _this_ , you'll eat your tail.


	35. Centralization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com with fanart, info on chapter progress, and somewhat important setting information! Check it out!
> 
> The title of the chapter refers to "centralization" as chess terminology. Introducing the unnamed-in-this-chapter, mostly-OC Professor Peach, who Rooster Teeth forgot to make exist. More on her later, or maybe on the blog.

_just for a second, look into my eyes_

_as you stand and look across the great divide_

_as you let go of tears for what you leave behind_

_while looking back again to say farewell for one last time_

 

[vnv nation - the great divide](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZiKdpT2Ha0)

 

* * *

 N **J** KA

* * *

 

Getting back to the school sure is a time! It's already afternoon when you finally get there, exhausted, beat-up, the blood in your hair all dried and crusty. You can feel your aura doing... _something_ to your ears, it itches a little in a way that keeps threatening to drive you nuts and you're pretty sure things that are healing usually itch? Maybe you're crazy, but you'd swear the more you think about your ears, the more your aura responds to work on them. Is that how it's supposed to be? You _really_ hope they teach you more about this stuff while you're here.

Unfortunately, you still can't actually hear anything apart from these tiny rasping noises every so often. At least it's progress, probably! And it's a little bit mean, but you feel kinda better about this knowing Kanaya's stuck dealing with it too. It would suck even worse to be the only person excluded! As it is, you keep exchanging annoyed, semi-commiserating glances with her when your partners talk and neither of you can hear a word of it.

A professor you're not familiar with meets you at the school's entrance, a kind of enthusiastically motherly woman with big round eyes and cute little deer horns that make you a little uncomfortable for a second, considering the whole Grimm experience you just had. You think she might be the school's nurse, actually, or maybe she doubles as school nurse, since she tries to lead you and Kanaya off to clean up your wounds. Unfortunately the operative word there is _'tries,'_ because the second Kanaya realizes what's happening she freaks out and runs off to who knows where. Aradia follows after her, so you guess it doesn't have to be your problem.

The nurse's office (?) is nice, and you have to admit that there's something comforting about being here with another Faunus. You've just... had a lot of unpleasant experiences with humans lately, is all.

It's weird how naturally you've started to think things like 'another Faunus,' instead of just 'a Faunus.' You're a little sad about it, to be honest; it doesn't seem like something you should have a lot of reason to care about since you were already part dog, but adjusting to actually considering yourself to be _another species_ is just...

Well, you're not sure _what_ it is. Sad, yeah, but also awkward and creepy and somehow _lonely_ _,_ especially because it's... a lot easier than you thought it would be. You wish you hadn't screwed things up so badly with Kanaya, because she is having the same problem times a billion and minus the easiness and you'd really, really like to try to help somehow.

The professor sits you down on kind of a bed-like thing, then takes out her scroll. For a few seconds you have no idea what she's doing with it, before she holds it out for you to see:

[i need to clean up the blood and examine the injury. is that ok?]

You smile nervously and nod; she smiles back, very warm and honest, and goes off to gather some doctor-y stuff from drawers and counters. God, realistically you're going to be fine, you're sure you'll be fine, but there's still a nagging fear that some stupid monsters in the woods destroyed your hearing permanently on your first day at hero school. That would not be an awesome start to the whole Huntress experience.

The door opens again, and Ruby steps through. You can't help but perk up instantly. She looks super worried, which isn't ideal, but mostly you're just glad to see a genuinely friendly face and happy that she came to check on you. Your ears sting when they twitch in her direction; you try not to wince, but you can't help it.

She says something. It would really be cool if you could read lips, but you can't, so you just shake your head a little and point to your ears. Then she blurs into petals and smacks right into your middle, hugging you hard enough to squish out some of your air. You didn't realize how badly you needed a hug until it was happening, and all of a sudden your eyes are a little hot and just a tiny bit moist.

... Also, _god_ she smells good. It's tough to say exactly when it was during your time living with her and her sister that Ruby's scent kind of became synonymous with 'home,' but it sure did happen. It is really lucky that you're a dog, because otherwise that would be totally weird, and you definitely don't mean it in a weird way, like, at all! _Not_ _even a little bit._

The professor-nurse comes back and shoos her away, but she lets her stay in the room, which is extremely nice and kinda helps you feel better about this whole thing. Then she dabs all around your ears with swabs of whatever, wet and cold and tickly and stinging. It's hard not to reflexively jerk away, and you still can't exactly 'hear' things in the traditional sense but you _can_ hear the scraping inside just enough for it to make you feel a little sick.

After a little more of that she seems to have gotten the blood out of the way, and she shows you her scroll again:

[going to disinfect and take a better look inside. this will hurt.]

... Well, you appreciate her honesty.

It does hurt, plus it's really uncomfortable! Having your ears touched isn't weird or anything, but getting something stuck inside them definitely is. The holes in your skull are super big and it's creepy to be reminded about it, you always feel like you could accidentally stick your finger right into your brain.

You wince, chew on your lip, and ow, _ow,_ whatever she's scrubbing in there with sizzles and sends sharp needles of pain through your skin, and it keeps on stinging for a while even after she's done. She shines a little light in and you try to sit still while you anxiously wait for bad news. It's almost hard to look at her scroll when she types her next message, but you make yourself do it:

[there shouldn't be any permanent damage. make sure to keep your aura focused on healing and try not to touch. for the next few days, before you go to sleep and as soon as you get up in the morning, clean them out gently with warm water and then apply the salve i'm prescribing. no washing your hair, and absolutely no hair spray or soap!]

 _Whew_ _www,_ okay, alright. Okay. You let out an embarrassingly big held breath. The professor says something to Ruby and she does something similar; she must have told her more or less what she just told you. God, that was scary! It isn't like you wouldn't eventually get used to being deaf, probably, but it still would've sucked!

... Hold on. Something weird just occurred to you. You don't want to talk while deaf and like, yell by accident or something, so you try to signal the professor to look your way and then type a message on your scroll:

[what about my regular ears?]

The expression on her face, kind of half-confused and half-pitying, catches you off guard until you realize you said 'regular ears' instead of something else that _wouldn't_ have been messed up. Dang it, you probably just came off as super self-hating or something. It's not like that, obviously, you've just had an unusual experience with your personal species history, but you can't exactly _explain_ that to her. She types up another message, and this one is unexpected:

[were you raised by humans?]

You're not sure how to respond to that, because no, you technically weren't, but you might as well have been considering you are definitely culturally human in your own unique way.

[it's a little complicated, but kinda?]

She can just... fill in the blanks with whatever she wants. This is getting really embarrassing, god, why are you so dumb? Also... why is she typing so much? It's kind of nerve-wracking, since you can't really imagine what she could have to say that would take more than a sentence or two.

Then she shows you, and the message kind of blows your mind.

[for faunus with ears as their trait, the human ears are vestigial. they don't actually work at all. this happens sometimes, where faunus who were raised by humans convince themselves that those ears are actually doing something. it's uncommon, but not unheard of.]

That - wait - no, that's not - _what?_ Is... is she serious? That can't be right, can it? You _know_ your ears work, they worked _before_ you came here! Before... wait... if they worked your whole life, even as a dog girl, but you really were sort of physically _rebuilt_ by this continuum, then... have you seriously just been imagining it this whole month? Your dog ears _are_ sensitive enough that touching the human ones would still technically be audible... Now you can't stop poking at the human ones, kind of accidentally; it's hard not to, even though you're obviously still deaf right now no matter what the deal is.

You must look pretty stupid, but it's hard to care when you are officially low-key freaked out. This... does kind of track with your time in the woods, though. Why would something that only disoriented Nepeta and Aradia outright deafen you in _all_ of your ears, if the human ones were similar to theirs, which you think are even a little bit enhanced?

... Jeez, it feels like your life is a lie. Alright that's a silly exaggeration, but still, a tiny part of your universe just got turned upside down! Of all the things to discover today, something like this would not ever have crossed your mind.

The professor is looking at you sympathetically; her eyes and weird sad smile are definitely non-verbally saying _'oh, honey'_ in that weird cloying way that people do on TV.

[oh.]

That's... really all you can think to say. Ruby looks confused and worried so you'd better tell her you're fine or... something. Whatever, you can sort this ear mind-screw out later and maybe explain it to her then? God, how do you even bring something like that up, though? Your head's still spinning as you type and hold your scroll out to her:

[i'm okay, i promise! i'll explain later but it's nothing bad.]

The professor hands you a piece of paper that you assume is the prescription or whatever; you really want to not be here anymore, so you take it quickly, kind of dazedly wave and wander out the door. As soon as it closes behind you, Ruby gives you another big, tight hug.

It's weirdly hard to let go.

 

* * *

~{ **O** }~

* * *

 

There is at best half an hour remaining before the team assignment ceremony begins, and you are enmeshed in one of the greatest struggles you face in this age, trying _very_ hard to keep your thoughts properly organized. Typically you excel at such matters, but this particular annual conundrum is at its most trying.

You sit at your desk, staring at the holographic console built into its systems, and you draw on every bit of willpower and creativity you possess as you attempt to christen not one, but _two_ teams whose members seem to have been named by fate specifically to drive you to into the waiting arms of madness.

Every year without exception you regret having instated the original policies for Huntsman team names, and every year you feel as though you're forced to bend your own rules yet further. In this case you're beginning to think it's time to accept imperfection and utilize some letters to represent sounds that are at best vaguely similar; if you lower yourself to that, you can at least use names that, when written in full, are not apocalyptically embarrassing.

"Professor Ozpin, it's nearly time for the ceremony," Glynda says from over your shoulder; her patience runs thin today, and you cannot bring yourself to blame her.

"Glynda, both of these teams contain the letter J and neither is in possession of a single member whose first name starts with a vowel." You like to think of yourself as a _mature_ aggregate consciousness, but your voice carries a distinctly petulant undertone nonetheless.

"Professor," she says, tapping her weapon against her palm ominously.

"Tell me James and Qrow won't mock me for relying on two students' last names during this process. It _is_ technically allowed." At this point you've lowered your face into your hands, slightly muffling your voice. "Lie to me, Glynda. Let me pretend."

"I'm not fond of telling lies, Professor." You can't really fault her obvious amusement ; if you were in her position, you'd be holding back a smirk at yourself, too. Not that _she's_ holding back. You're quite sure that if you glance back at her, her features will be adorned with an expression entirely befitting a woman who carries a riding crop on school grounds.

"I should have known better than to turn to _you_ for mercy," you mumble, closing a few search engine tabs and an online dictionary before returning to the half-filled forms for two particularly vexing sets of young warriors.

"You really should have." Glynda makes her exit; off to attend to various behind-the-curtain preparations, no doubt. You'll have to be content with the fact that, as hard as things may be, at least there are no students whose names start with 'X' this year.

You suppress the urge to shudder. Some scars never fade away.

 

* * *

 **P**???

* * *

 

Is it silly to feel guilt for something that you couldn't have anticipated or prevented _and_ turned out more or less all right? It probably is, but right now, sitting backstage with various other students waiting for your turn in the team assignment ceremony, you can't help but see Kanaya and the dog girl from this morning sitting in awkward deafened silence without wondering if you _could_ have prevented this. Perhaps you should have tried to keep everyone together rather than letting several people run off into the woods after unknown enemies.

Kanaya in particular looks utterly miserable; the other victim has a friend fussing over her, but _she_ certainly doesn't. Even her partner is mostly leaving her alone, which actually makes you a little bit angry. Isn't it her responsibility to at least _pretend_ to care?

"Pyrrha? Are you okay?"

Oh. For a few seconds you had entirely forgotten Jaune was here.

"Yes, of course. It's just..." It's just that it seems unfair that you have someone worrying over you when you weren't so much as scratched, but no one is at all concerned with a badly-injured student who could actually do with some sympathy. You're not sure how to say that out loud without it seeming unappreciative, so you gesture helplessly in her direction instead.

"... Yeah. I noticed that too. I, uh, might have been staring at her because I thought she was a vampire this morning, but now I just feel bad, y'know?" He fidgets with his sheathed sword; for a moment you're afraid he'll accidentally cause it to spring open. Again. Jaune has an... _unconventional_ way of interacting with the world, but you've been glad to see he's a kind-hearted person overall.

"Perhaps I... hmm. Wait here for a moment, I'll be right back." While you don't plan to abandon him for long, this is really bothering you and if you don't at least try to involve yourself you're going to feel guilty all night.

You make your way across the room, still bustling with anxious fighters, and only realize once you reach her that you haven't actually thought of how you'll _communicate._ Perhaps you could type something on your scroll? That seems inelegant, but it would work... Yes, you'll just have to try it. She's staring at you while you deliberate, and there's an imperious quality to her gaze that makes you anxious.

[Are you okay?]

Her expression is unreadable for a few long seconds. Then she takes out her own scroll and writes her response:

[Thats None Of Your Business]

... oh. Well, that's... unexpectedly hurtful, but it's her prerogative. Maybe you've managed to mess this up and be rude after all. While you're attempting to recover from being thrown off-balance so, she glares and prepares another message.

[Leave Me Alone]

It's difficult to articulate why, but between the redness in her narrowed eyes and the way her hand shakes very slightly holding her scroll, you find yourself only wanting to help her _more_. Even so, if she wishes to be left alone, you won't force yourself on her.

[I'm sorry.]

You can feel her resentful stare burning at your heels the whole walk back.

"What did she say?" Either Jaune is more perceptive than you thought or you've done a terrible job hiding your dejection.

"She... asked me to leave her alone." You really hope he doesn't press _you_ on this; you're already embarrassed enough.

"Oh. I guess -" Whatever he was about to say is cut off by the abrupt appearance of Professor... Goodwitch, you think? The intimidating woman with the riding crop. She looks no less severe now than she did earlier.

"Pyrrha Nikos and Jaune Arc, you're wanted on stage." The professor doesn't even wait for a reply before moving on to whoever else she's looking for. You exchange nervous glances with Jaune, do your best to put on your show face, and walk together beyond the curtain.

On this side of the stage you can see the audience, which seems to be made up primarily of older students. You hate being watched by a crowd; the main reason you can tolerate it during tournaments is that you can shut them out by focusing everything on the fight. It's the ceremonies at the end that make you most uncomfortable, and this is very much the same.

You're mildly surprised to see both Nora Valkyrie and Lie Ren follow you to line up in front of the Headmaster. Well, as far as teammates go, you think you'll get along just fine with the two of them; you know for a certainty that you can work well together in the field, and they seemed nice enough. You're not sure whether this group was put together due to your coalescence during initiation or if it's a coincidence brought on by something more arbitrary. Logically it would be the former, but considering how your partners were assigned, it's probably the latter.

Headmaster Ozpin speaks into a rather loud microphone, addressing both your group and the crowd at the same time.

"Pyrrha Nikos. Jaune Arc. Lie Ren. Nora Valkyrie." You try not to wince at hearing your name broadcast so widely, which is a bit silly considering everyone likely knows you by sight anyway. "The four of you retrieved the white rook pieces." The confusing and arbitrary method after all, then. You're really not surprised. "From this day forward, you will work together as Team PRNA, led by... Pyrrha Nikos!"

Hmm. He seems to have used both Jaune and Ren's last names, although you're a little confused about _which_ of Ren's names is first and which is last. Ozpin pronounces the name as 'Prana.' You're not sure what color your team name is meant to represent. All of them, maybe? That could make sense. You are a rather thematically dissonent bunch.

... As for your leadership, you had been secretly hoping it wouldn't be this way, but it doesn't come as any sort of surprise. You're unsure of whether the assignment has more to do with your performance in the forest or your fame, but it doesn't really matter. The decision has been made.

The audience's roaring applause is probably well intentioned, but it still makes you feel ill.

 

* * *

 **N** JKA

* * *

 

You are offic-eel-y bored. Floating around rearplatform for almost an hour feels like a purrsonal attack by the school after you already had to krill half the aftermidnight - _afternoon -_ waiting for your partner to get her ears molested. Now you have to sit here whale she trades seacret messages with her obvious human crush, Aradia drifts around around being a nuisance to random people, and Kanaya sulks and hisses at everymoby who gets near her.

The one pawsitive thing about being here should've been getting to hang out with Blake, but she keeps being distracted by the blonde gill with the huge venom sacs who poached her back in the forest, whose name you know but are too mad to use. You are trying _furry hard_ not to be obviously jelly-ous, but she mast have noticed you sending her death glares by now. It reely sucks, because you _liked_ her last night! She made a lot of good puns and smelled like violence. You actshoally wouldn't have minded being her frond, befur you realized she's bassically just a more cattractive, less problematic version of you.

You've got _one_ tuna advantage, and it's that at least you're not _human,_ but how fur is that going to carry you? Now you have to be _extra-good_ at likeableness, you can't a-fjord anything less.

 _Ugh._ You just want this dumb day to end already. The school seems like it purrvides respite blocks, so can't you go take a catnap already? You'll probubbly be less irritable if you can finally get some alone time.

At some point, one of the humans from the forest comes by to hit on Kanaya and gets rejected instantly. It takes a lot of effort not to facepawlm over that. The schooner she stops whining and just lets somebody rail her, the better, but no, that would be quay too easy, wouldn't it?

You are just aboat stressed out enough by the crowd and your fronds to want to scratch somebody's face off, when you're _fin-ally_ called out by one of the instructors.

"Nepeta Leijon and Jade Harley, you're wanted on stage." She sounds like she's said that a lot recently and is reel sick of it, and she wastes no time stalking off in what may or may not be Aradia and Kanaya's direction. You have to poke Jade with your clawtip, get up, and gesture for her to come the shell along already before she understands what's happening.

She'd better get her herring back soon. This is such a pain.

Out front, there are roes and roes of spectators staring at you like you're in an arena cullmatch. Aliens are so weird, why should they care aboat any of this? It's super un-cat-fur-a-bell being watched like this.

Anywaves, the main school human is standing there with a vocal amplification device; you line up like you're waiting for your execution. A-ray-dia and Kanaya are here, so they must be the other half of your team, or squid, or whatever they're calling it. As fur-strating as Kanaya has been lately, it's a reef-lief that it's those two and not aliens.

Rather than stare at all the eelien voyeurs, you look up and to the side at a viewscreen showing litters from your names lined up the same way you are: 'N J K A.'

"Nepeta Leijon. Jade Harley. Kanaya Maryam. Aradia Megido. The four of you retrieved the black knight pieces. From this day forward, you will work together as Team NJKA, led by..." he pronounces it 'Nazca;' you don't know what the heck that means, but you bait it's stupid. "Nepeta Leijon!"

Wait, reely? You hadn't bothered to think aboat who would _lead_ you. _You're_ reely the _leader?_ That's... _that's_ _so clawsome_ _!_ You wonder what Karkitty would think. This almost makos up for being stuck with Jade.

When you overheard this whale process happening to other teams from behind the curtain, the spectators all went craysea; it must be a human thing, some weird ritual they do to show appurroval or somefin.

This time, the clapping is scattered and quiet; you can practically count the ones doing it on your claws. A gill with hopbeast ears cheers. Some of the humans actually _boo._ Whale, you shouldn't be surprised. They're all bottom-feeders. Why would they have any nice sediments for a team of four mangy animals?

Waterever. In two sweeps you'll be a legend and they'll still be plankton. Let them screech all they want.

 

* * *

NJ **K** A

* * *

 

It's fully night, now, and quite frankly you are _exhausted_ _,_ muscles aching all over. Your ears are _finally_ starting to function again, if not particularly well; if you strain yourself it's possible to understand voices as long as they're relatively close by and of appreciable volume.

All you want is to lie down somewhere quiet and private and sleep. You would give _anything_ to get to stop thinking and feeling things for a while.

The one good thing about this day is that Jade knew well enough to keep her snout clear of you, even if you caught her giving you a few pitying looks from time to time. Then again it's nearly canceled out by a _stranger -_ a _human_ stranger, no less - having the gall to flirt over your injuries _in public._

Yes, yes, you get that these people don't see relationships and displays of affection the same way you do, but it's just... impossible to feel any other way. If anything, your knowledge of how humans operate would imply she wanted up your _skirt_ if she wanted anything at all.

She's lucky you were too tired to do anything but tell her to leave you alone. In the moment you felt more like punching her in her stupid presumptuous face.

You're so lost in bitter remembrance that you nearly walk right into Aradia when she comes to a sudden stop in the... what do the humans call this again... yes, that's right, the dormitory hallway.

Nepeta is the first to speak; it's not _too_ difficult to understand her, which implies she is actually being rather loud.

 _"Wait_ _._ Hold your seahorses. What block number did everyone get?"

"Six one two!" Aradia says. "Why, what do you have?"

 _"Six one two!_ Jade? How aboat you?" Nepeta is starting to sound mildly frantic, which seems like an overreaction for what must have been a misprint on her security negation rectangle.

"Umm... Six one two," Jade says. "Kanaya?"

A cold, anxious weight is beginning to settle in your digestive tract. The odds of this being an accident have just dropped significantly. You almost don't want to look at your own rectangle again, because you've forgotten what was on it; you were mostly following your teammates out of pure distraction.

"... Oh. Oh no." You swallow, hard. "Six one two."

"They catn't just... they didn't cram us into _one block_ like sardines, did they? That's impawsible. That's craysea." She sounds every bit as panicky as you feel.

Aradia is the first one to actually take action, inserting her rectangle into the scanner and slowly pushing open the door.

"Welp," she says.

There are four sleeping platforms inside, and plenty enough space for a small group, as well as doors to what you dearly hope are an ablution block and some sort of storage area.

"Guys, it's... not that weird? I think a lot of dorms are like this. It's probably just what they do here." Jade sounds alarmingly fine with this; in fact, she seems confused as to why the rest of you are upset.

 _"Not weird?_ You don't just _share_ blocks like this! That's for, like, _reely_ dedicated moray-eels! Even _matesprits_ have to be a purrfect match to risk it. This is impawsible, we'll end up krilling each other within a week. If we're _lucky."_

"I second that sentiment," you say. You can feel your hand responding to your anxiety by very slowly drifting toward your bag. Forget a week, this might come to blows _tonight._ Aradia, incredible traitor that she is, actually _shrugs._

"You know, it could be fun," she says. Nepeta's jaw all but drops, and you glare incredulously. "We _might_ not murder each other, and if anyone did try, it would make things _way more interesting!"_

"Not all of us are absurd, suicidal _hedonists,_ Aradia," you snap.

"Hey! _Guys_ _!"_ Jade again, wide-eyed and slowly backing away. Hmph. For once her instincts are actually functioning properly. "How about we all chill out and give this a chance? We can just try it out, and -"

 _"Do not tell me to calm down,"_ you say, stepping forward quite deliberately into her personal space. "How _dare_ you -"

She slaps you in the face.

You are honestly so astonished that you don't even hit back.

"This isn't some freaking romance thing, you over-dramatic _jerk!_ I am _angry!_ Was Karkat hitting on you every time he had to yell at you to get your _sh..._ to get yourself _together_ enough to act like _civilized people?!"_

Jade is right up in your face, so close you can feel her breath as she yells; she actually _sounds_ like she's yelling, which probably means that her voice is literally shaking the walls. You have never seen her like this, not even slightly; is this how she felt that night you spoke to her on your scroll? No, even then she had some semblance over control over herself.

That night _was_ a matter of pity, however temporary. This... is admittedly difficult to see in anything resembling that light.

"I am not even your leader but so help me god if you don't all get in this stupid room and sit down and put your stuff away and _try to adjust even a little bit to the actual real world you are living in now,_ I will... I'll... Aagh! I don't know! I'll keep yelling until you're so annoyed by it that you do it just to shut me up!"

That is... distressingly compelling. No wonder she and Karkat got along. You _do_ want very badly to just lie down and (die) pass out already. These are... these are your _friends,_ however bitter you're being, and she has a point. This _isn't_ Alternia. They probably have nothing to gain by potentially betraying you. It's stupid, inappropriate, and frightening, but realistically... no one is going to kill you in your sleep.

(Even if they did, maybe it would be a mercy.)

"Hey, so some people are staring at us now!" Aradia is still maddeningly cheerful; in fact, she's actually grinning. Of course she is. When _doesn't_ she love watching people squirm? You are rapidly beginning to regret this partnership. "How about we talk about this more inside the block, whether or not we stay there, because I _love_ making a scene, but I think I'm probably the only one."

"... Fine," you mumble, feeling horribly defeated.

"... Oquay," you just barely hear Nepeta mutter, sounding similarly dead inside.

 

* * *

 

The discussion lasts at least an hour, so long that it all becomes one circular blur. In the end consensus is resentfully reached: you will all attempt to give this system a chance, and if after a few days someone has attempted violence on an _indisputably genuine_ scale or no one can stand it for some other reason, you'll petition the school for mercy.

You mostly just want this to be over with before you break down sobbing in front of everyone.

Once there's an appropriate period of silence, you excuse yourself to the small ablution block you _were_ actually lucky enough to have. You do your best not to look in the mirror, curl up on the floor, and finally let yourself cry, distressingly salty and colorless lines spreading down your cheeks.

No one will hear you; Jade's ears are still partially damaged, and while Nepeta and Aradia do have somewhat better senses than humans would, you're fairly sure that keeping your hands clasped over your mouth will be sufficient.

You sit there and cry for a very, very long time.

Eventually there's a knock on the door. You wipe your eyes as best you can, attempt to compose yourself, and open it halfway.

Jade stares in at you, scratching at the back of her head awkwardly; for a moment she seems to have forgotten whatever it is she wanted. You know perfectly well that she can see how red your eyes are. At least she probably didn't _hear_ you. That's the part that you truly cannot abide, even in your imagination.

"Hey, um. I'm supposed to clean out my ears and stuff before I sleep, and I'm really sleepy, so... I kinda need to use the sink." She winces slightly, as if she expects you to begin shouting again. It's not an unreasonable fear.

You wordlessly step aside and let her pass. It appears that your teammates have each staked out their respective territories and claimed their sleeping platforms, which is irksome but essentially forgivable, given your foolish absence.

No one says a word to you. Ideal.

When Jade eventually emerges again, however, she hands you a small bottle. You stare at the label; it's some kind of medical supply item.

"Um, I'm supposed to like, carefully wash out my ears and put this stuff on them every night and morning for a couple of days, and you should probably do that too." Is she serious? Does she really think you'd want the _slightest_ assistance, and from _her_ of all people?

"I will be _fine,"_ you say, biting off the last word. Jade sighs, and then she looks you right in the eye.

"So you don't mind losing your hearing and slowing us all down?"

... At this point, you think that you're starting to actually despise this girl, and not in a fun way. The issue is only exacerbated by the fact that she's _right._ You're only _in_ this situation because she talked you into it, and she was right about _that_ too, because as much as you're miserable being here, it's better than having literally no purpose at all.

You swipe the stupid bottle out of her hands, stalk back into the ablution block, and slam the door behind you.

What a _wonderful_ start to your new career.


	36. Past and Present Tense (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obligatory reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com! Check it out for fanart, updates on chapter progress, and extra setting information. There's been some really excellent new fanart lately, too.

  _wait near the end of September, wait for some stars to show_

_try so hard not to remember what all empty playgrounds know:_

_that sympathy is cruel, reluctant jester or simpering fool_

 

_[the weakerthans - fallow](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CeAjzj7sQFU) _

 

* * *

 NJK **A**

* * *

  **3rd Morning, Spring Semester (Tuesday)**

 

For once, you don't actually spend most of your night visiting dreams. It was a tiring day! Also, you are pretty excited to see what this whole human schoolfeeding thing is like, and that seems like it will be easier to do if you aren't yawning the whole time

The first thing you do when you wake up is grab the revolver from under your fluff rectangle; you never know who might be getting ready to stab you in an atavistic rage. Nobody is doing that, though, which is nice! It looks like Jade and Nepeta are still asleep and your resident ticking delayed-action explosive device is sitting on the edge of her sleeping platform, staring blankly at the floor.

You give her a little wave; she doesn't really acknowledge you. Well, that's alright! You're still all caked with dirt and grass stains and stuff and there is definitely a dihydrogen monoxide-based grime scourging station in here. There's nothing quite like scalding liquids to get your pan working in the evening. Morning, rather.

Since you're smart and also commit enough crimes to avoid poverty, you did check in some belongings last night, and they seem to have been placed here before you first arrived in this dormitory block, which means that you get to wash your hair _extra-luxuriously._

Once all that's done, you change into the kinda adorable institution-mandated uniform you got before coming here. You wonder if Kanaya hates these or if she thinks they're fun! Well, right now she hates everything, but a saner version of her would probably have a more meaningful opinion to share.

It takes you all of this time and re-emerging into the main block without any real incident to notice something that should have been very obvious. Wow, it's hard to rattle you even a little bit, and this definitely _is_ just a little bit, but if you're right about this it represents some next-level fundamental psychological changes.

You should really check on the other trolls to see if they're feeling it (or rather, _not_ feeling it), because you're a pretty poor benchmark for basically anything ever. Nepeta is awake now and hasn't been responding to all social interaction by being annoying, so you will have to ask her first!

"Hey Nepeta!", you say. "Is it just me or do we barely have any territorial instincts left? I haven't wanted to kill you guys even a _little_ bit!"

There's a long silence; she looks at you like you're crazy, which is fair considering that you are definitely crazy, then her tail stiffens and kinda whacks into her sleeping platform trying to drop lower than it has room to.

"... I didn't even reel-ize," she says. "I thought I was just ocray with Blake beclaws, uh..."

"Because you want to rail her until she falls asleep in your lap," you supply cheerfully. Nepeta glares at you, tail bristling. See, _now_ she looks like she wants to commit a murder. That's more like it.

"Yes, _that,"_ she mutters. "You're gross. Anywaves, I guess it's just... whale... diffurent?"

"Welcome to _losing yourself,"_ Kanaya says. You thought she sounded dead inside _yesterday,_ but she just keeps finding new lows! "Or did you not consider the implications of having your soul violated by forcible placement into a _pack mammal's_ horrid flesh?"

"You don't have to be _rude_ aboat it." Nepeta is still bristling, but you're pretty confident it's not because of you anymore. It seems like you're all kind of hitting your limits in terms of how much Whiny Teammate you can put up with. "I am going to drown myshellf in the scourging station now and think about anyfin but this!" She stands up, grabs a little sack of her stuff from under her platform, walks past both of you without causing much of a stir, and is just about to shut the ablution block when she shoots back over her shoulder, "I don't mean that _litterally,_ by the quay. I'm not _Kanaya."_

Kanaya does not get a chance to respond before Nepeta's shut and locked the door behind her. She moves like she's about to get up, then just sits back down, digging her clawtips into the sheets. You consider whistling, but no, that might make her snap, and then you'll _all_ be late for schoolfeeding.

Jade yawns and stretches, sits up and rubs at her eyes with her knuckles. Then she sees Kanaya, who currently resembles an overloaded reactor core that's about to detonate.

"Did I miss something?" When there's no response, she looks to you and you shrug.

"Eh, not really. So, who else is excited for _murder classes?"_

Kanaya buries her face in her hands.

 

* * *

 

You spend a while kind of considering your next move while everybody takes turns erasing the evidence of all the killing you did yesterday, and by the time you're ready to go search for your first class, you've decided to take a certain chance. Jade and Nepeta are the first two out the door, which is convenient.

"Oh hey, Kanaya! Can I talk to you for a minute?" She stops and stares at you as if you're speaking an alien language. Actually, you think you're _all_ doing that, but the simile stands.

"... Very well," she says; you nod to the other two nerds to go on ahead and then shut the door, leading her back over to your respective platforms. "What do you want from me?"

"I want you to deal with your problems!"

"... _Excuse_ me?" Kanaya's jaw doesn't drop or anything but she is giving off that same sense of shocked outrage. God, she is being _such_ a drama empress.

"You heard me. I am your partner now and you act like you're always five seconds away from attacking people just for existing and that is going to get me in trouble! It's way too soon in the semester for that, I wanted to wait at _least_ a week before doing anything that could be traced back to us."

"I _really_ don't care if I cause _you_ problems." Her eye twitches a little.

"See, that's what I mean! You keep doing that. Whenever somebody says anything you don't like, suddenly they're your new worst enemy. Even _I'm_ running out of patience. Nobody's hitting on you and pretty much all the arguments you get in are your own fault. So go _talk_ to somebody, because now I've said as much as I can say without it getting weird!"

She's quiet, surprisingly. You actually thought she would start yelling or throw something or just get up and leave, but instead she just looks haunted. That's progress!

"Talk to _who,_ Aradia?"

"I don't know. Anybody, I guess! Aliens are weird, I bet you could find one of _them_ to complain to, and you'd never have to bother doing it again unless you wanted to. Just stop making yourself into such a _problem._ It's not like you."

Kanaya doesn't really respond to that, either. Oh well. You've done everything you're willing to; _you're_ sure not going to go for the poor thing, so you get up and head out. It might take a little hurrying to make it on time, but you'll be fine. You almost expect her not to follow you out, but she does.

There, that's your selfish good deed for the sweep taken care of.

Now it's time to start your first real day at _violence school._

 

* * *

R **W** BY

* * *

 

 _There's a knock on your bedroom door. You freeze up, anxiety_ _washing over_ _you like a gust of winter wind_ _. Of course this had to be coming, but you weren't ready for it, not in the least. Then again, how could you possibly prepare yourself for the retribution you're owed after misbehavior of this magnitude?_

_Father doesn't wait for permission to enter; really, you should be thankful he even bothered knocking in the first place._

_The look on his face is almost too much to bear. You thought he would be angry; you_ hoped _he would be angry. That you can at least feel resentful about later. Instead, he's_ disappointed.

 _He doesn't say anything you haven't thought yourself_ _. Only that you were a fool for risking the your life, and more importantly the Schnee family legacy, to protect a_ dog. _A human being is another thing; acts of heroism may be stupid, but at least they build reputation._ _Here,_ _there was nothing to gain whatsoever._

 _Who are you, and what have you done with his daughter?_ _His sweet little songbird, who didn't overstep her bounds or dream for meaningless things or embarrass him?_

 _Father_ _orders you to turn your back to him, and for some reason you do, as if your body simply moves without thinking. You couldn't stop it if you tried._ _If you love animals so much, he says, then you ought to be treated like an animal._

 _Something tears a burning line into your back and you scream._ _You've always heard rumors about the Schnee dust mines; how could you not?_ _Y_ _ou_ _are_ _no fool_ _._ _Despite your beliefs, the reasons for your apathy, you_ know _that it's wrong how your family business finds ways to pay lower wages to its Faunus employees, is stricter_ _on them_ _,_ _is_ _distinctly unfair._

 _However, y_ _ou have never believed_ _for a second that there could be any truth to the worst of the rumors, that the poorest Faunus with no other recourse are treated like slaves outright, given lashes as punishment for disobedience or failure._

_But if your father is willing to do it to his own daughter, then maybe you were wrong._

_You try to be strong, to grit your teeth through the pain, but it's too much, it goes on for too long, and eventually you're reduced to a pale ruin of yourself; crying, begging for mercy. How stupid of you to bother at all._

_Jacques Schnee has not been merciful once in his life._

 

* * *

**Earlier this morning**

 

You wake up with the end of a word you can't remember still hot on your breath, and for a moment you honestly have no idea where you are. Thankfully, it doesn't take too long before reality comes trickling back to you.

This is not your (prison) house. This is your team dormitory at Beacon Academy, a continent away from that man. You try to calm your breathing, swallow to find your throat painfully dry, rub tears and sleep from your eyes.

What a stupid dream. Father may have hit you a few times when you were younger, but nothing outrageous like _that_ ever happened, nothing that wasn't a normal way to handle a disobedient child.

You fumble for your scroll, currently lying ignobly on the floor. 5:30 AM. _Ugh._ This leaves you _two and a half hours_ to kill before your first class, and your alarm was set for _6:30._ There's no way on Remnant you're going back to sleep, either; even if you _could,_ which is highly doubtful, you're not going to risk slipping back into the same dream.

Turning over onto your side, you stop dead upon realizing there are eyes on you. Blake. The rude one from the other day who's partnered with the obnoxious blonde. Oh god. Why is _she_ awake this early? What did you say in your sleep? How much did she _hear?_ What does that strange, sad look on her face mean?

"What -" you begin to say.

_"GOOD MORNING, TEAAAAM RWBY!"_

You jerk backward and bump your head against the wall; across the room, you can hear Blake snort. Lovely. Your 'leader' is awake now, too. It's hard for you to imagine _she's_ the kind of person who wakes up early, which begs the question... just how loud _were_ you?

Her sister groans and covers her head with a pillow; Ruby hops out of bed and initiates a tug-of-war over it that ends in Yang rolling off onto the floor.

"Why have you done this," she says, lying face down, voice muffled by the carpet. "I thought you loved me."

"Because it's morning! It's already - wait, what time is it?" It apparently did not occur to Ruby to even bother glancing at her scroll before assaulting a family member.

"It's five thirty," you say, bitterly. "Two and a half _hours_ before class. Go back to sleep, you goblin. Leave us alone."

"I don't know, Weiss," Blake says. "It's not _that_ early; we were both awake, after all."

This woman is evil. You'd call her a traitor, but she was never on your side to begin with; you suppose that makes her more of a dedicated enemy than anything else. What _you_ ever did to earn her ire, you haven't the slightest clue. She's apparently just one of the many wacky new characters inserted into your life to by some spiteful god to ruin everything.

"Well, I for one am _wayyyy_ too excited to just _go back to sleep_ _,_ and as your leader, I decree that we use this time to do something important!" Less than two minutes into day one and she's already abusing her power. Why are you not surprised?

"Such as?" Blake asks, instead of voicing some sort of logical objection. Ruby raises her finger in the air as if to punctuate a statement, then furrows her brow.

"Uh... hmm... well, we could, um... _dang,"_ she says, whispering the last word to herself. Amazing. She is every bit as stupid as your first impression of her suggested. "Ooh, I know! How about we _decorate the dorm?"_

... Oh, damn her, that's actually a decent idea, but you can't _say_ that. You won't give her the satisfaction.

"We do still have to unpack," Blake says, lifting a bag from beneath her bed. Its clasp immediately comes loose, dumping various objects everywhere; she seems undaunted by this omen. "And clean. Also, I'm pretty sure classes are at nine, not eight."

There's a long silence while everyone attempts to absorb _that_ information. She cannot be serious. You... could have sworn... did you misread that just because there was no room in your mind for an educational institution lax enough to start its classes at _nine o'clock?_

"I suppose we'll have plenty of time," you mumble to yourself. You intend to budget your extra hour for fantasies about the deaths of everyone in this room, yourself included.

"Someone shoot me," Yang groans. "Lay me to _rest."_

... Well, at least you're not the only person longing for a swift exit.

 

* * *

 

In an hour's time, the dormitory has metamorphosed from a room filled with baggage to a room filled with _garbage;_ it's as if you're standing in the midst of an oddly stench-free landfill. You can hardly see the _floor._ The beds are like islands rising from a sea of bad decisions.

This isn't a _surprise,_ since you've watched the disaster unfold slowly, Ruby and Yang repeatedly insisting 'it'll be fine' while your suspicion that they are both brain damaged feels more and more like a certainty. Blake is clearly not as stupid, which implies that instead she is _terrible and antagonistic_ and has been compounding the problem with gusto specifically to make you suffer.

"Okay, yeah, maybe this isn't gonna work out," Yang says at long last.

"Really? You _think?_ Whatever gave you that impression?" You're not letting this by without comment. If you don't establish yourself as the one reasonable human being in this room, they might start thinking you're one of them.

"Maybe if we have so many things, we should look into alternate ways of storing them?" You'd swear she distinctly glances your way when she says 'we,' both times. You're about to destroy her with a comment about thinning out the impressive stash of lewd novels she thinks you didn't see her hide, but Ruby beats you to the podium.

"Or we could ditch the beds... and _replace them with bunk beds_ _!_ _"_ The mere idea seems to fill her with unholy energy. You, meanwhile, do your best to ignore an odd and difficult to identify feeling in your stomach. Now is not the time.

"That sounds extremely dangerous," you say flatly. "I would prefer not to be crushed to death." That gives you an idea, though, and you quickly realize what a fool you're being; you have to take this chance while you have it. "Actually, perhaps if I had one of the top bunks..."

You'd be able to retire every night knowing there was a chance you'd crush one of these imbeciles into a fine red paste in your sleep. It would be a genuine accident, but you'd still reap the satisfaction.

Okay, that's a bit ridiculous. You don't _actually_ want that to happen. Mostly.

"Dibs on the top bunk," Ruby and Blake say at almost precisely the same time. This is an outrage.

"Didn't I _just say_ I wanted one?" It's impossible to keep the incredulity from your voice. Actually, maybe it _is_ possible. You wouldn't know, since you didn't try.

"I didn't hear you call _dibs_ on one, Weiss," Blake says, smirking. God, you'd love to smack that look right off her stupid face.

"She's right." Yang, sounding dejected, though not half as much as she ought to. "The early bird steals the bed. I don't make the rules."

"That is _not_ how that saying -" you snap, before you're cut off by Ruby.

 _"Exactly!_ Now let's get started on this while we still have time!" As though you don't have _two and a half hours_ left. You only wish the process could be so slow; having something to do with your hands is at least a vague distraction from the idiot brigade. "Now, does anybody have any rope?"

"I do," Blake says, because apparently she confused the words 'schooling' and 'spelunking' when she packed her belongings. "I'm calling _dibs_ on the side with my partner, though. You two have fun with that."

It takes you a solid five seconds to realize how thoroughly you've just been played.

 

* * *

N **J** KA

* * *

 

Your first class of the day is Grimm Studies, and you are honestly _super nervous!_ Not so much about the subject itself but just... well... you've never _been_ to school, not even a regular one. Just being in the _city_ was overwhelming, since you're really not used to being around so many people who aren't consorts or carapaceons, and now you're on a crowded campus full of students and everyone is wearing deadly weapons and every hallway you walk down earns you at least one or two dirty looks or unashamedly curious stares at your ears.

It's kinda sad that you're _relieved_ your ears are still hurt, because they ache pretty bad but at least it means all the noise is a little more bearable.

What's making this worse is that you're with _your_ team and not, well, Ruby. That's such a mean thing to think, but you can't help it! Nepeta is nice enough when she isn't treating you like a burden, Aradia actually _is_ nice but a little scary, and Kanaya...

You don't want to spend too much time thinking about her. When you first talked to her you honestly thought you could be pretty good friends, and no matter how much you've agonized over it these past few weeks you still think you made the best decision you could at the time, for both yourself _and_ her, but it looks like the price for it was making her hate you.

Everyone files into the Grimm Studies room, which is really big and looks kind of like a small-ish college lecture hall to go by what you used to see on the internet. It also smells weirdly like there have been animals or something in here. That aside, you weren't totally sure whether Beacon is more like high school or college, but you're starting to get the impression that it's a little of both. Assuming the education system here works anything like the ones you used to be vaguely familiar with is probably not going to help you at all.

There's a name already written on the far blackboard in large, fancy, squiggly script: _Professor Port._ Time to meet a new teacher, you guess! That'll be fun at least.

It's a little bit of a rush to find seats, and pretty much your whole team has to shoulder-check your way through human students who don't care about getting in your way. You're not a very aggressive person but you just have no interest in taking anybody's crap, and the other three have even less. If anything you should probably be glad no one's been stabbed or shot yet.

Eventually you find space, lined up frustratingly far toward the back of the classroom; Kanaya and Aradia sit next to each other, so you put yourself on the end by Nepeta. It's not that you have a problem with being in the middle in _general,_ but you just... you're not going to sit next to Kanaya. The more you can avoid her right now, the better.

It looks like team RWBY are all situated somewhere in the middle, and PRNA end up near the middle and closer to the front. Their leader is famous or something, and the other students just parted in front of her like the ocean parting in front of that one bible guy.

You can't help but kind of scan the room for other Faunus; you just feel really outnumbered and it's not doing your nerves any favors. It's not always easy to _tell_ who's a Faunus depending on the angle and whether their scent is or isn't overwhelmed by a bunch of other ones, but you end up catching the eye of a girl with big rabbit ears who smiles when she notices you looking, and that makes you feel a little better.

 _'Hi, we are the same species'_ seems like a really silly reason to try to befriend someone, but you might do it later anyway. You could use another friend or two who doesn't despise you.

There are so many conversations overlapping in this room that you end up thinking _again_ that you're glad your hearing is messed up. In a day or two you'll be able to _understand_ all of them and that is going to be _very_ distracting.

Everyone quiets down all at once when the professor comes in. He's a big, round man with a _huge_ mustache who kind of makes you think of what Santa Claus might look like if he hunted reindeer instead of having them pull his sleigh and also he traded his beard to make the rest of his facial hair gain a life of its own.

 _"Monsters,"_ he says, instead of introducing himself. "Demons. _Prowlers of the night._ Yes, the creatures of Grimm have many names, but _I_ merely refer to them as _prey!_ Ha- _ha!"_

Professor Port looks up at the class expectantly; you're not actually sure what he's expecting, though. You can hear a student or two sigh, but mostly he's met with silence. He clears his throat awkwardly.

"... And you shall too, upon graduating from this _prestigious_ academy! Now, as I was saying, Vale, as well as the other three Kingdoms," wait, hold on, he _wasn't_ saying anything like that, did he hallucinate part of his own speech? Is he... is he _okay?_ "... Are safe havens in an otherwise treacherous world! Our planet is absolutely _teeming_ with creatures that would love nothing more than to tear you to pieces!"

You can hear Nepeta's tail thwapping excitedly back and forth, and it actually smacks into the back of your chair once or twice. It's lucky the seats here have partially open backs, otherwise this would be a nightmare for her and anybody with a similar trait.

"And that's where _we_ come in. Huntsmen! _Huntresses."_ The professor stops for a second to wink at someone; you can hear Yang go _'ugh,'_ which may or may not mean it was her. _"That_ is what you are training to become. But first: a story. A tale of a young, handsome man... _me!_ When I was a boy..."

You can clearly hear various quiet groans and annoyed mutters from the class, and you get where they're coming from, but... there's something really familiar about a silly old man rambling about his life hunting exciting and dangerous game. As they all start to tune him out, you start to tune _in._

He's kind of annoying and a tiny bit gross, but you think you like Professor Port anyway.

 

* * *

 

Halfway through the class, things take a turn for the intense. Finishing up a long story about capturing a Beowolf live, which you actually found kind of interesting considering how incredibly hard it is to get them to stop doing anything but use their monster strength to murder everything in sight, he changes gears.

"A true Huntsman must be honorable. A true Huntsman must be strategic, well-educated, and wise! So, who among you believes themselves to be the _embodiment_ of these traits?"

 _"I do, sir!"_ _,_ a very annoying voice calls out exactly as Nepeta says _"Me!"_

Oh great, it's _her._ Weiss Schnee sounding angry as usual, although you're not sure what she has to be angry about right now. You're not sure how you're supposed to feel about her at all. She kind of saved your life, but she's also really genuinely awful, and it's making it hard to decide if it's wrong for you to keep hating her.

Being grateful to someone you really dislike is not fun at all. You guess... you guess if she ever starts being nice to Ruby _and_ being less racist, _maybe_ then you'll give her a chance. _Maybe._ In the meantime you'll just have to go on despising her with the awareness that you owe her at least one big favor someday.

"Hmm," Professor Port says, _"Two_ eager young ladies, eh? Well, I can work with that. So, _let's find out_ _what you're capable of_ _._ Prepare yourselves and face your opponents!" He walks to the side of the little stage he's on and drags out a huge cage with some kind of boar Grimm inside. Then he drags out _another_ one.

... You were wondering why you smelled animals in here. Now you know.

Nepeta and Weiss are sent into a small side room one after the other to change back into their combat outfits, which in Nepeta's case is a lot less elaborate. Everybody _did_ have instructions to keep their regular clothes on them in between classes, which you'd thought was weird. Apparently it was because stuff like _this_ happens.

You feel like you should cheer or say something encouraging, but... you're not sure Nepeta really cares about what you think.

"Yeah, represent _team RWBY!"_ Ruby shouts; both Weiss and Nepeta turn to glare at her.

"Ruby, I'm _trying_ to _focus,"_ Weiss says. Ruby looks down and mumbles something sadly. Yeah, you're never going to get along with that jerk. Ever.

"Mew go distract and capsize one, I'll claw out its guts," Nepeta tells Weiss. "We'll be fin-ished in no time." Weiss looks at her like she's speaking another language.

"... I have absolutely no idea what you just said," she says. You can't see Nepeta roll her eyes, but you know her well enough at this point to assume that she does.

"Knock it over and I'll kill it," she says irritably.

"Let the match... _begin!"_

Professor Port pulls out a big axe and whacks the locks off both cages with one quick strike each. That thing looks like it hits _hard;_ he was barely even trying.

Weiss and Nepeta immediately spring to opposite sides of the stage while the boars growl and then... whoa, okay! You were not expecting them to curl up like pill bugs and then do Sonic the Hedgehog spin attacks. Nepeta vaults clear over the one that goes for her; Weiss does something weird and creates a black magic circle thingy in the air. Her boar slams into it and bounces off, and then she twists her free hand and summons a white one to its side that seems to shove it away in a burst of force, sending it tumbling end-over-end toward Nepeta, who pounces on it, digs in her claws, and claws out half its solid black insides, as promised.

"Aha! Excellent teamwork!" Professor Port seems extremely pleased with them.

The remaining boar has already recovered and shot off like a cannonball back at Nepeta, too quickly to dodge this time. She blocks it with her claws crossed in front of her, sliding a quarter of the way across the stage before it spins itself out, then hooks them underneath its tusks and flips it on its back. Weiss jumps into the air, calls up another one of her weird floating platforms, and launches herself down at an angle, impaling it instantly.

"Well, that was easea," Nepeta says, obviously disappointed.

"Bravo! _Bra-vo_ indeed! It appears we are in the presence of a pair of true Huntresses-in-training!" The professor stars a slow clap; a couple of students join in, and then stop once it becomes obvious no one else bothered and they just made themselves look dumb. You give Nepeta a thumbs up; she just shrugs. Ouch. "I'm afraid that's all the time we have for today," Port continues. "Be sure to cover the assigned readings, and stay vigilant! Class dismissed!"

Nepeta makes her way back up to her seat while Weiss, apparently upset by something, stalks over to grab her bag and then leaves her team behind without a word.

"What's _her_ damage?" Yang asks no one in particular. Ruby gets up and follows her out.

Okay, that was a heck of a first class! The professor is pretty okay, and there's hands-on stuff to do sometimes, which is neat. All in all it was a lot less scary than you thought it might be. You're actually kind of excited about whatever comes next after lunch.

... You just feel kind of weird about your partner working more smoothly with a racist you hate than she does with you.

That is not very encouraging.


	37. Past and Present Tense (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obligatory reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com! Check it out for fanart, updates on chapter progress, and extra setting information.
> 
> This is one of the four chapters that've made me laugh the hardest so far.

_the more bleak the day, the less i behave_

_as if everything black can wash away_

 

[the birthday massacre – in the dark](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qeO1pEeK9fY)

 

* * *

 **R** WBY

* * *

 

After being really pretty cool in class but also kind of mean to you, Weiss just kinda _leaves._ You're not sure what her deal is! It's too hard to tell what she's thinking and it stresses you out and then you keep finding out the answer is something dumb or cruel or both, but it's not like you can just leave it alone and hope everything will turn out fine, especially when she's your own actual partner, doesn't that kinda make it your responsibility?

You catch up to her halfway to what will be the cafeteria if you read the directions right (which is not at all a sure thing).

"Weiss! What's wrong? Why did you just leave like that?"

She stops and whirls around dramatically; her ponytail kind of does an anime swish thing, which you hadn't actually realized was a thing real hair could do.

"What's wrong? What _isn't_ wrong? This whole day is an absolute _mess_ and most of that is _entirely your fault!"_ Jeez, she's _really_ angry, it reminds you of when you first met her. You hope it doesn't end in her trying to hit you this time. That was not great at all!

"What did _I_ do? I don't get it!" You really don't, either, _you've_ been having a pretty _good_ day. Class was kinda boring but it wasn't hard, there are live Grimm in the school, you got to spend the morning hanging out with your team and decorating and stuff... it's been _fun._

Hasn't it?

"Of course you don't, and that's half the problem. You behave as if this is all some sort of _game._ You've been dubiously appointed leader for all of _one day_ and you're already bossing people around and wasting time on pointless and occasionally _dangerous_ nonsense, and you act as if that's completely ordinary!"

"... _Am_ I bossing everyone around? I didn't mean to. I was just – I was just excited."

You're not good with people. That's not exactly a new piece of information, you've _always_ been bad with people. Half the time you have no idea what they're thinking or feeling, and then when you _do_ feel like you can tell, you end up being wrong and making things awkward and dumb and sometimes even painful. The only person you can even _sort of_ interpret is Jade, and that's because you grew up with a corgi for a best friend.

Even with that, though, you thought you could at least handle things well enough not to completely screw everything up here. Maybe it shouldn't be a surprise that you're doing that anyway. It's what's happened to every other friendship in your whole life.

"Yes, I've _noticed,_ and frankly that's the _only_ thing you are. All of your actions are taken on impulse instead of logic, you're loud and obnoxious, there seems to be very close to _nothing_ going on inside your head – it's no wonder you can only get along with a _dog,_ since you might as well _be_ one for all the yapping and irritation."

Oh, not _this_ again. Every time you're starting to feel bad for Weiss she turns around and says something completely horrible and then you're right back to wondering why you even bother trying to get through to her. You probably _are_ terrible at being a leader but even if you weren't you think she would find some way to hate how you were doing things. The only thing she knows how to _do_ is pick things apart and find all the flaws in them, like some kind of... _flaw-finder._

"Don't _call_ her that, she's a _person!_ If you hate her so much then why did you protect her?" You should probably not bring this up when you're trying to make a situation less bad instead of throwing Dust on the flames, but you kind of feel like she sets _you_ on fire, in the worst and most literal way.

The first thing just makes Weiss look like her eyes are going to explode or pop out of her head, and then when you say the other thing she sort of _twitches._ For a second you think it's an angry twitch – and maybe it is, you clearly don't know anything about what anything means – but you don't think that's actually it, it's something weirder.

"That has _nothing_ to do with this conversation. Do you even have the slightest idea _why_ I left class like that? Even the barest inkling?" Ugh, does she really have to keep flipping the subject around? It's hard to keep up with her and that's a super unfair way to have an argument! All it means is _'ooooh look at me, I'm Weiss Schnee and I'm too stuck-up to answer questions unless they're easy!'_

"No, I _don't,_ because you still haven't told me!" How are you supposed to know something like that? Does she think you're psychic? Or... are you really that much worse at being a person than everybody else is? What if it's actually obvious and you're just... _that bad?_

"I left because it was simpler to work with some flea-bitten _thrift-shop dweller_ who speaks in _puns_ than it has been to work with _you!_ Do you know what a _relief_ it was to team up with someone who doesn't make every situation five times more complicated than it has to be?"

You feel like screaming or breaking something. It's not actually easy to make you mad, you're used to being more shy and anxious around angry people, but this is just so _stupid!_ Whether or not she has a point, it always keeps coming around to _this_ stuff!

"Why are you _like this_? What's your problem with Faunus? I don't understand! How are they any different than us and why should you care even if they _were?_ You keep going out of your way to bring it up, too, like you're _proud_ of it! It's _weird!_ What are you trying to prove?" You want an answer to this! It's confusing and it's gross and it makes you furious and all you can kinda think is _god_ you are sort of lucky your team is four humans because if some poor Faunus had to be near her for more than two seconds it would be an actual tragedy.

"It's none of your _business,_ and frankly my motives should go without saying! Your precious little _puppy_ held me at _gunpoint_ the first time I met her and that's pretty much in line with every _other_ encounter with their kind I've had the displeasure of enduring. They are _violent_ and _unstable_ and -"

 _"You were violent first!_ I just – _aagh!_ You're _impossible!"_

At this point, students are kind of parting around the both of you and giving you a _lot_ of space. You're totally making a scene and you don't care at all because this is ridiculous and if it makes you both look ridiculous then _good,_ it _should._

"Well, if this conversation is beyond your capabilities, is that all, then? May I go on my way, _leader?",_ she says, tone as icy-cold as everything else about her, and no, it's not! This is dumb and you are dumb for thinking it would just get better, and you're sick of just letting problems _slide._ You're tired of spending your life forcing yourself to be okay with things just because you don't think you can fix them.

No matter what Weiss says, her opinion is stupid and mean and coming from some weird place you can't even slightly imagine, and there are people who _like_ you and actually bother treating you like an equal and not some weirdo to ignore, two whole people who _believe_ in you, and you are going to prove her wrong, and she's going to regret being a jerk about all of this! You'll find a way to make this better! Not because you want to fix Weiss (you do) or because it hurts you (it does), but because you _can_ make it better, and if you don't then you're just letting Jade and Yang down for believing and that's the worst thing you can imagine.

"No. That's not all. That's not even close to all." You feel weirdly focused all of a sudden, narrowed down like when you're lining up a long distance shot with Crescent Rose, when the whole world is just you and a problem you need to solve.

"Oh _really,"_ Weiss says, rolling her eyes.

"Yes really! I don't care about your stupid prejudice stuff and I don't care if you think I'm a bad leader or a bad partner, because you're wrong and I'm _not_ and I'm not _going_ to be. I'm going to get better, and keep getting better, and someday I'll be the greatest and smartest and best leader in the world, and I'll be the best _partner_ in the world, and you won't even be able to look at me without admitting I was right about everything!"

At some point you got way up in her personal space; you don't actually remember doing that, but here you are. You hate this. Being aggressive, being angry, being _harsh,_ it hurts and it feels wrong and it makes you feel like _you're_ wrong. Maybe you're in the right but it makes you feel wrong as a _human being_ , as a living person.

But what else are you supposed to do right now? How else can you deal with her? It's this or just backing down and letting her yell at you and trample over you and insult your best friend and be a heartless jerk, and you don't want to do that at all, you _won't_ do it. You'd rather be bad than let her be terrible.

Weiss looks... shocked more than anything? You expected her to get angrier, or hit you, or change the subject again, but she doesn't. She just stares at you super intensely with a strange twist to her face that you can't figure out.

"Well then." You've heard voices described as _sharp_ before but she honestly sounds like she could cut with a word. "Go ahead and prove me wrong if you can. I'll just amuse myself watching you _fail."_

 _N_ _ow_ she leaves, stalking off through the crowd, leaving you standing in the middle of a river of students, all fired up and disoriented and lost, not knowing if you should take a deep breath and try to calm down or even if you _can_ calm down, and you're not even sure that you're _angry_ exactly, you don't know _what_ you are but you're getting in a lot of people's way now and you're hungry and sad and just completely overwhelmed.

All of that stress and arguing, and you came out of it with nothing but frustration and five less minutes for lunch.

... You want a hug.

 

* * *

  **N** JKA

* * *

 

Clawlright, so human schools have some kind of mantadated attendance for a communal devouring sector, which sounds like it could tern ugly reel fast. Don't people efur fight over the food? If these were trawls there'd be a body count every day, which wouldn't be _weird_ or anyfin, but definitely isn't how aliens seem to operate.

... You keep furgetting what Aradia reelized, though: that obviously pack mammals _behave_ like pack mammals. Even _you_ have less fishues being around all of these people than you otter. It sort of makes you _want_ to pick a catfight just to keep things from getting awkward.

The sector is flooded with humans and the weird smells of human cooking. There are some Faunus, too, but naut many, same as purrobably most places in this city that aren't ghettoes. All the nasty looks and comments almost make you fish you _weren't_ a tr – a Faunus, just to get them to clam the shell up, but you'd hiss your tail a lot, plus just the tidea of changing to be more conchvenient for other people gives you a haddock.

It's... tough to blame Blake for hiding her ears, though. You hake seeing her have to be fur-tive about who she is, it makes you bristle, makes you want to claw the eyes out of everybody who ever made her feel bad about anything. Moby someday she can be more conchfident, or even just stick it in their stupid faces on purrpose like you sort of do.

Maybe you can _help_ her with that, if she'll let you.

Well, waterever happens there, you've gotta focus on this devouring sector thing fur now. You have _no idea_ how you're manta interact with this place. Some students are lining up places, some are floundering around others randomly, there are wooden tables everywhere, it's a mess.

"Jade, you're weird, so you know how this works, right?" She gives you a hissy Look and then shrugs.

"I kind of grew up on an island in the middle of the ocean? I have no idea. I've seen cafeterias on TV and in _movies,_ so I can... sort of guess? Who knows if it's different here, though? I think you keep forgetting this isn't actually my planet either."

"Moby a little bit," you grumble. It's not your fault! She used to be a human and there are humans packed into this planet like sardines. Off course you expect her to know things.

"I really don't care about proper protocol," Kanaya says, glaring at random strangers. "I'd like to secure something to eat, avoid being killed, and then get out of this place. All these humans would be bad enough even if they didn't unconditionally despise us." Yeah, she's got you there. This would dolphinately suck a lot less if you weren't all the lowest of lowbloods by these bottomfeeders' standards.

"Let's just... go line up," Jade says. She sounds rudderly exhausted already, and she keeps looking at you weird, like you did something to hiss her off, but you have no idea what that cod even be. Kanaya's the one who's been picking on her, right?

"Is that what all those humans are doing?" A-ray-dia raises her brow. "Where do you go to draw lots?"

"I mean... I think so," Jade says, suddenly a lot more unshore. "Wait, why would anybody be drawing _lots?"_ You don't purrsonally have an answer for that. There wasn't much Altfurnian media aboat this kind of thing that interested you.

"To determine who is actually given food," Kanaya says, looking at her like she's reely dumb, which is probubbly fair. "I would assume about half of us receive rations, and are then expected to defend them from others; the unlucky will have to fight for it, though naturally attempting to take food from a notably higher-blooded student would be an offense punishable by death."

"Okay, no, guys, I'm _ninety percent_ sure everyone is supposed to get food and no one's going to be _brawling_ over it." Jade sighs and rubs her temples; you're not the only one getting a haddock, then. "I just – I think you line up, and then... something happens that doesn't involve _extreme violence."_

"Aww," Aradia says. "That's a letdown."

You are already board with this, so you just take a spot in line; some human buoy tries to steal it, you flick a set of claws loose, and he goes on his way.

"What's this _rope_ fur, though," you mutter, picking at the fuzzy stuff dangling in between little bronze pylons. It sways enticingly and you have to tear yourself away from a deep-sea-ted need to poke it some more.

"Leave that alone! It might set off explosives or dart traps or -" Kanaya snaps at you and then Jade cuts her off.

 _"I do_ _not_ _know but I really doubt it_ _is_ _going to kill anyone,"_ she hisses, ears flicking back angrily. "I just – why? _Why_ would it be like that? Is this seriously what it was like for you? Everything is a second away from blowing up or impaling someone?"

Kanaya, Aradia, and you all kinda shrug and nod.

"Look, just... there are some trays and plates and stuff here, take some, that's probably how it works, who even cares," she mutters, grabbing hershellf some objects. The rest of you try to imitate her; at least she has _theories._

"So does someone _give_ you food, or do you take it? Ooh, is that a human grub leg?" Aradia's staring hungrily at some kind of roe-sted haunch.

"No! What? No! Nobody is going to eat any babies here! That's not how humans do things!" You think Jade only needs a couple more hooks in her before she snaps. She sure looks that way, at least.

"It's true," Kanaya says dejectedly. "Humans _never_ eat their young. I learned this the hard way years ago." Some random member of the pacific species in question turns their head to stare, like somemoby just said somefin un-cat-tural.

"Well that's just _wasteful,"_ Aradia says. She's not wrong! "What do they do with the ones who aren't fit to survive on their own?"

"Oh my god can we please not talk about this in public," Jade groans. Aradia barrel rolls her eyes. You guess Jade has a point, though. People are starting to give you quay weirder looks than befur, if that's even pawsible. "... Is that guy just taking food? Is that how this works?"

"Why are you asking me?" Kanaya glares at her. "I'm still working through my disappointment at finding out I won't even be able to earn my meal properly by annihilating the unworthy."

"Just... please. Take some food and put it on your plate. What's the worst that could happen?" Jade mast realize she doesn't want the answer to that, and continues. _"Whatever you are about to say I can tell you this much: it's not execution."_

"Well I still think that looks like grub meat," Aradia says, plopping some down on her nutrition circle. "So I am just going to pretend that it is and have a much better time that way!"

"That's what _I_ always do," Kanaya says, and Jade hides her face in her paws.

 

* * *

 

You all mako it through the ordeal mostly unscathed, except for Jade's sanity taking a dive. Finding somewhere to sit is a bit of a fishue; it's obvious none of the humans want any _animals_ in their space. Eventshoally you manage to find a spot in the corner, which is naut taken for some reason even though it's pawbviously the most defensible position.

Aradia and Kanaya waste no time devouring their catches. You're aboat to do the same when you notice Jade staring at you all weird again.

"Okay, what is your purroblem?" The schooner she answers, the sooner you can start eating with minimal anxiety.

"Do you actually know anything about Weiss Schnee? The girl in white you were fighting with this morning?" ... All right, that's... not anyfin you expected.

"No? Shoald I?" Did you miss somefin? You're not shore why you would know anything about this random human.

"Yes! She is awful and she hates me," Jade says. "She tried to hit my – she tried to hit Ruby just for getting in her way, she's horrible to Faunus for some reason, and..." She trawls off.

"And what?" You would reely appreciate her getting to the point already.

"I don't know! Why did you just _click_ with her right away when she's terrible, after spending a whole day being mean to _me_ when I was _trying_ to get along with you?"

"... Beclaws she's better at hunting than you are?" It's hard to fathom why she even had to ask when it's so obvious. Jade looks sort of gutted.

"I'm _trying,"_ she says quietly. "I didn't spend my whole life murdering things like you, I just... did some hunting as a kid and then played the game, mostly. And I'm used to being able to teleport, and shrink things, and _fly,_ and I'm trying to – I'm _trying_ to adjust to this, so... can you _please_ be less of a jerk to me?"

Whale, that's... super uncomfurtably direct. At least she _wants_ to suck less, you guess? It's not great dragging her through everything like an anchor, but... maybe you _have_ been a tuna bit hard on her. She was useful near the end of the hunt against the cervidae monsters, and it's not like you can get rid of her anywaves.

"... Let's mako a deal. If you tail me and watch me hunting propellorly sometimes and try to learn how to be less useless, I'll be a _little_ more furgiving. Is that good enough?"

It had betta be, beclaws it's all she's going to get.

"Okay," Jade says. She looks both so sad and so reel-ieved that you almast feel gillty, but there's no point in cod-ling her when it'll just get everyone krilled. "... Thank you."

 _"_ _Is it really necessary to do this in front of me?",_ Kanaya cuts in. "This reconciliation of yours ought to be a private affair. Some of us have better things to do with our attention."

"Is it really necessary for you to be _the worst?!"_ Jade growls. _Actually_ growls, low and angry. It's a good look on her. "You don't get to crap all over everyone just because you're jealous that we're actually starting to get along!"

There's a short silence befur Kanaya gets up and just... walks away.

"I'll see you all in class," she says coldly over her shoalder, and then she's gone. Moby someone should go after her so she doesn't do anyfin stupid, but you're not about to make her _your_ purroblem.

Apparently nobody else is, either.

 

* * *

 **P** RNA

* * *

 

A third of the way through lunch, and you're already beginning to feel twitchy. It's such an absurd thing, to feel overwhelmed by the presence of _too many people_ of all things, but then, you were never really cut out to be famous in the first place, were you? Clearly not, given that a cafeteria's worth of stares is enough to put you so on edge.

Your new teammates aren't bothered, or if they are you certainly can't tell. Nora seems to feed on ambient energy and is in the middle of rambling to Jaune about comic books as if she hasn't a care in the world; Ren is eating slowly with the same eerie serenity that suffuses everything he does. Jaune _does_ seem distracted, actually, but not by the crowd; he keeps glancing awkwardly at NJKA's table in the corner.

This 'ghost' thing is starting to... not irritate you, exactly, but it's trying your patience a little at this point. As bizarre as a Semblance like hers is, it's a far more reasonable explanation for what happened than anything else is.

"Jaune," you say, trying to keep your voice level, "I think you can safely accept that there are no undead at this school."

"Wait, what?" He seems confused. Did you... misunderstand something? "No, I know, I get that already. I just... Haven't you noticed everybody, y'know, _avoiding_ them all?" You hadn't noticed that, actually; you were too busy feeling sorry for yourself. "It's just kind of sad, you know? I don't get what the big deal is."

"Where did you grow up, Jaune?" Ren, breaking his trademark silence. Jaune's as surprised by this as you are.

"Uh, nowhere special, really? Just... a small village on Anima. Kind of in the middle of nowhere, I guess." Hm. That's interesting. For some reason it didn't occur to you that he might have come from somewhere similar to you.

"Wait, where exactly on Anima?" Nora is suddenly very interested in the conversation; her eyes have brightened up significantly, which is surprising considering they were already all but emitting light.

"I don't really have a _map_ on me, but... the closest village was Shion? That's still kind of in the middle of nowhere, though."

"I've been there! So has Ren! That's _crazy,_ you were like, a hundred miles away from us!"

Apparently your whole team is from the same side of Anima. That feels oddly significant to you, though it's hard to put your finger on why. Ren doesn't surprise you, considering his attire, but the others could have hailed from nearly anywhere.

"We can discuss that later," Ren says. You're not sure you've actually seen him _smile_ before, and this... hardly qualifies, but you're starting to suspect that any visible expression on his face at all is significant. "Were there any Faunus in your village at all?"

"I... don't think so," Jaune says, face screwed up in concentration. "If there were I didn't know about them."

"There you have it. If you didn't have any reason to see that kind of prejudice in person, it's natural that it would seem excessive to you, but this is relatively standard for most locations with a population that contains but is not _predominantly_ Faunus." As soon as he's done, Ren goes back to gracefully consuming the quarter of his lunch that Nora didn't eat while he was busy talking.

You hadn't thought of Ren as someone who spent time considering issues like this. Then again, he comes across as a person constantly lost in his own thoughts. Who really knows what goes on in his mind? Nora, perhaps, since they seem to go back, but it wouldn't surprise you if the list stops there.

More importantly, you continue seeing evidence to support your choice partnering with Jaune Arc, who remains the weakest link on your team by far in terms of utility in combat, but never seems to stop worrying about other people. He can be inconsiderate, but typically only by accident. It's... heartening to know you've found someone like him.

 _"_ _Heyy_ _yy_ _there, friend!"_

You jerk back and almost slide your chair away from the table to go for your weapons; gods, you really _are_ on edge today. Jaune chokes on something; Ren and Nora seem completely unperturbed.

Speaking of the girl who literally haunted your partner's dreams, she's appeared out of almost nowhere and is now leaning over your table, eyes and creepy grin wide. You... okay, you can sort of see how Jaune might actually be concerned about her, given the rest of the nonsense that went on there. It's difficult to accept that expressions like that belong on real faces.

She quickly notices him still coughing around some chunk of food, and whacks him on the back with the flat of her hand; he ejects whatever it was out into his hand and discards it in a wad of napkin.

"Th-thanks," he says, sputtering and wiping off his face. "Uh, what's – what's up, Aradia?"

"Oh, my teammates are being dumb about stuff and I got bored of Kanaya being all 'bluhh, my girlfriend dumped me and I'm totally adrift in an uncaring universe, somebody allow me the sweet release of death,' but then she left and I realized losing some of the drama made things even more boring, so I thought I'd go bother you guys!"

"That seems a bit harsh," you say. You're... not sure how much you _like_ Aradia. It's nice that Jaune has a _'friend'_ who isn't part of his team, you suppose, but she doesn't seem to have much empathy at - wait, did she say _'girlfriend?'_

"She'll be fine, she's got a tougher dermis than she gives herself credit for. I've seen her bounce back from worse than this! Well, maybe not, I guess I was dead at the time, but it happened." What... how do you process _that?_ "Anyway, she gets mad if anyone's nice to her lately, so it's better to just not take any of her nonsense. So how are _you_ pupas doin' today?"

"Pupas? What, like... bugs?" Nora quirks her head to the side almost comically far as Aradia pulls herself a chair without actually asking if anyone minds, facing it the wrong way and resting her arms atop its back. You suppose that no one does mind, but it's still a bit presumptuous.

"Yeah, you know, older than larvae, younger than adults? What do you people call that – _kids,_ right, yeah!" ... Who _is_ this girl? You're at a loss for words, though that does happen to you fairly often.

"Why are you describing people with insect terminology?" Ren, appearing genuinely curious.

"That's just how we did things back home," Aradia says, rocking her chair back and forth dangerously far. "The question stands, though!"

"I – I guess I'm okay," Jaune mumbles.

"Doin' just fine!" Nora says, giving her a thumbs-up.

Ren nods and shrugs, riding the coattails of Nora's answer.

"I... actually, I think I'm going to go get some air," you say, because between the crowd and the addition of one more high-energy person to your table, you're having a very slight bit of difficulty breathing. "I'll be back before lunch is over."

You leave before anyone can really question you about it. There's no simple or comfortable way to say that if you have to be around any more people you're going to either hyperventilate or start accidentally warping silverware without touching it.

There's a stairwell across the room that seems promising. You get there as quickly as you can without making more of a scene than your mere presence already does and proceed to ascend. An invisible weight lifts from your chest the instant you're out of view of other students.

Up one floor, the stairs open out onto a low rooftop overlooking part of the school grounds; the Spring breeze is cool and clear. You're immediately confident that this was the right decision.

Abruptly you realize you are very much not alone up here, and your confidence wavers.

It's her; Kanaya, if memory serves, the Faunus girl who thoroughly rebuffed your attempted friendliness yesterday. She's sitting on the very edge of the roof, legs hanging off, staring out into the distance. You should... probably just leave before she notices you.

Her ears twitch backward. Ah. Right. Clearly she's healed enough to have surpassed your own senses. In that case, perhaps you should... oh, she's inclined her head vaguely in your direction. She shrugs and goes back to ignoring you. You suppose you'll take that as tacit approval; your presence doesn't mean you actually have to _speak_ with her.

You cross with no small amount of trepidation and settle yourself in a similar position, ten or so feet removed. In the periphery of your vision you see her turn her head in your direction again, just for a moment, before continuing the silence. It's... probably for the best.

It's nice out here; perhaps it's _too_ nice. The thought of returning to school is not particularly pleasant. Your first class wasn't nearly as bad as lunch was, but being cooped up with lots of people who won't stop watching you and talking about you behind your back is just... not what you wanted, when you came here.

... Now that you think about it, you suspect it isn't why _she_ came here either, and as much as blind admiration lacks the pleasantness that many people seem to envision, it must still be better than how the typical human responds to a Faunus. Sometimes the world likes to remind you how ugly it can be. You really wish it would stop doing that.

... Is this awkward environment really the best way to become a hero? Not for the first time you find yourself wondering if the Huntsman from all those years ago went to one of the academies; his skill was so overwhelming that you can't imagine anything less, but somehow he didn't seem the type to care for traditional institutions. For all you know he wasn't even licensed, not that it would change much.

You wonder also whether you'll ever see him again, whether he's still alive. What in the world you'd _say_ to him if you met you honestly don't know, but you'd like to at least have the opportunity to thank him. He taught you more about being a Huntress in a single conversation than you'd learned from your entire life up to that moment.

Unfortunately, it's been several years already. As much as you despise the thought, a span of time like that is more than enough to erase even the most skilled Huntsman from the world. It wouldn't surprise you at all to find that he's gone and forgotten.

You exhale slowly and perhaps loudly; you wouldn't say that you _sigh,_ but that wouldn't be too far off the mark, either.

Something moves in the corner of your eye again, and suddenly you remember the other person who's airing out her melancholy in the area. She's watching you oddly intently, and this may be the first time you've seen her that she wasn't glaring outright.

If there's any applicable social protocol for this circumstance, you're unsure what it is; you shrug slightly, manage a half-smile. Nothing changes about her demeanor, but that's at least better than having earned her ire. After another few debatably tense seconds, her shoulders slacken just the slightest bit. She sighs herself, and returns to studying the middle distance.

You pass a few minutes in this way, just sort of existing in the same space in a silence that you'd like to think could be described as companionable, though that may be giving yourself too much credit.

It's a shame you'll be inside again in five minutes, plunged back into layers of background chatter and prying eyes.

This is actually rather nice.


	38. Past and Present Tense (3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obligatory reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com! Check it out for fanart, updates on chapter progress, and extra setting information.
> 
> Been waiting for this first scene for a while.

_hey exponent, what are you accelerating today?_

_to increase the age of our hearts, to put us down to sleep_

 

[_the seedy seeds –_ _hey_ _exponent_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1mhBUhvX88)

 

* * *

PRN **A** ( **J** )

* * *

 

So you were kinda hoping the school year would start out with _exciting_ classes, not Grimm Studies and _History,_ but... you know, after initiation and seeing how honestly pathetic you are compared to pretty much everybody else here, maybe that's for the best. It's not _your_ fault you didn't know much about how aura worked! Your parents weren't exactly leaping at the chance to teach you anything useful. If anything, they were steering you the _other way._

... Although it's definitely your fault that you, y'know, forged your way in here. Maybe you should just be glad you didn't die. And that ghosts and vampires are _probably_ not real? Being haunted in your sleep isn't how you usually make friends – well, usually you _don't_ make friends – but hey, it's something.

History starts out pretty basic, except for the professor buzzing around the room so fast that you wonder if that's his fiftieth cup of coffee for the day. It's kind of hard to pay much attention, half because he talks so fast and half because history is a _really_ boring subject. You have a hard time caring about stuff that happened a hundred years ago unless it has to do with wars and heroes, and some of this brushes up on that, but it's just not the _same_ when it's coming from a teacher instead of semi-fiction comic books.

Something about the early founding of the Kingdoms, some weird info about the King of Vale that ought to be _so cool_ considering he was, like, the most epic hero who ever lived, but somehow still makes you want to take a nap... How does anybody keep up with this stuff?

Looking around the room, you can tell you're definitely not the only one whose attention is wandering, and your team is kind of half and half; you and Nora are barely here, Ren is totally impossible to get a read on, and Pyrrha is obviously trying her best to care but not exactly pulling it off.

NJKA have a... weird reaction to this, basically. You're trying to remember all their names – Aradia and Kanaya are like, burned into your skull even though they're so foreign you can't place them, but the other two... you can't remember the cat girl's name, and you want to say the dog girl's name starts with a J too but it mostly escapes you. Whoops.

Anyway, cat girl and Kanaya are pretty much in Pyrrha's spot: trying to care and failing. J-something looks like your typical good student who doesn't actually care a _lot_ but knows how to absorb the info for tests or whatever. Aradia, though...

Your weird ghost friend looks even more excited than she did when she was torturing you or when Nora got really into pretending the two of them were eating human flesh together. Huh... you wouldn't have thought she would be the history nerd type, but wow, she really is. She looks like she's devouring every word, she's even taking _notes,_ scribbling along so fast that they might keep up with Professor Something's lecture.

What is it that she cares about so much? It's kinda confusing; this is all just names and dates and blah blah about when X Kingdom established Y Territory, and sure, those things _matter_ but you're here to learn how to be heroes, not how to get degrees in World History and teach at some university, and why else would anyone even bother?

She just seems... so _happy._ That's kind of a weird observation to make because she _always_ looks happy, but... seeing her now, it's just _different._ Usually there's this serial killer grin plastered on her face and an almost visual glow of manic energy, but she's just... _smiling_ , like, the way a regular person smiles.

If you didn't know better you'd say it's the first time you've seen a _real_ smile on her face.

Okay, now you have _got_ to ask her about this. If she wants to be your friend, which for some reason seems to be happening, you want to know how she's so passionate about something that feels like watching paint dry. There's gotta be an angle to this that you're missing.

 

* * *

 

Class lets out with one really nice detail: your only homework for now is some assigned reading. You'll just... skim that later. Skating by on the Crag's Notes has gotten you through life so far, it's not gonna to let you down now.

Everybody kind of clusters together for a few seconds afterward; teams PRNA, NJKA, and RWBY, at least. You don't really know anybody in RWBY but it seems like they're pretty tight with NJKA. Maybe they're cool. The girl in white is... _stupidly_ pretty, for one thing. Then again it's not like your team is exactly lacking in, uh, attractive women.

You end up lurking off to the side a little while plans get discussed. Ren and Nora are going to the library – you think it's more like _Ren's_ going there and she's glued to him, but still. Pyrrha looks like she can't decide _what_ she wants to do. It's kind of obvious that she's been stressed out by something. By all the weird looks she keeps giving other students, you'd guess it has to do with that.

Kanaya ducks out pretty fast and heads back to her dorm; you have no clue what her damage is but _wow_ she does not get along with _anybody,_ not even her own partner. Cat girl obviously doesn't want to get stuck with her but doesn't want to be stuck around all these people either, and disappears off to who knows where. Pyrrha finally gives in to her nerves and excuses herself. You almost follow her, but...

In the end, everyone but those three head for the library. You _want_ to make sure Pyrrha's okay, but this weirdness with Aradia is too much to leave alone.

So the library is pretty nice! It's sure nicer than the one in Shion. There are hardlight consoles all over the place and you _know_ that's not rare for big city tech, but you're a country kid, it's still pretty impressive.

Everybody scatters a little. J-girl and RWBY's leader go off together somewhere; those two seem pretty close. The blonde and the girl with the bow split off too. The white-haired girl vanishes into the aisles. Aradia somehow snags her own table, and once she's there it doesn't look like most of the other students want to touch the place. That kinda... feels weird to think about.

"Uh, hey, do you mind if I hang out here?" It's tough to keep the anxiety out of your voice. You know it's ridiculous, but some part of your subconscious is still convinced she's a supernatural creature or whatever and that puts you on edge.

"Sure," she says. She sounds pretty distracted already leafing through her history textbook. You sit down across from her and dig around in your backpack for yours. Man, this is going to suck, you bet you won't absorb _anything_ from this. You'll end up trying to cheese your way through with scroll searches for sure.

"... So, um... I was kinda wondering," you squeeze out, "Sorry if this is a dumb question but... why do you care about history so much? I mean – I'm not saying that's _weird,_ I just – I don't know, it feels so boring to me in class, but you seem like you like it, and I was... curious, I guess? Man, it sounds stupid now that I've said it." God, you did not take long to embarrass yourself. Was there even a way to phrase that that wouldn't have been awkward? There must have been.

"You know... it's been a long time since anybody asked me that," Aradia says, and there's that expression again, the one that's weird on her because it's _not_ weird, that makes her look almost like a human being – uh, crap, not, uh, not in _that_ way, you just meant – not like a crazy person? You're _so lucky_ nobody can read your mind.

... Nobody _can_ read your mind, right?

"It puts everything in perspective," she says. You stare at her, kind of confused. "Our lives and the world, I mean! Look how far back records go, and that's just what hasn't been lost. The world is so _old._ Every world is. For every person who's alive today there are _so many_ who are already dead. Here, there, everywhere you look, a planet is really just one big graveyard!" Oh boy. You can tell when you've _gotten somebody going_ and this is totally that. Also, it's really weird and creepy.

"That's... grim," you say. "Isn't that super depressing to think about?"

"Not at all!" She leans forward a little – not the usual thing where she gets up in your personal space, just... leaning. "It makes me so happy to think about all of the stories that have been forgotten. Every buried body is a story that's so long it took a whole lifespan to tell it, but we can still find out so much of what it was. It's the coolest thing ever."

"Okay," you say, trying to take that in. "That _kinda_ makes sense, but it's kinda messed up to think about people's lives like they're... I don't know. TV shows, I guess."

"Is it, though? Isn't it better for someone to keep on making other people happy even after they die? Everyone's life is a story. We just don't think about it, because we're our own main characters, and it makes people nervous to think about the things they wanted hidden being exposed. That's why I like archaeology, too, because it's _secret_ history, it's like finding lost volumes of the best novel series ever, filling in the blanks. Everything is just a bunch of secrets no one is keeping on purpose."

As disturbing and cold as that sounds... she just looks so _excited_ about it that it's hard to think she means to be cruel.

"I can... maybe see that. I guess... I always wanted to be a hero, and people remember heroes basically forever, so in a way it's like... no matter what happens, you still get to be a story _someone's_ telling?" As soon as you say that her eyes brighten even more. You guess she approves of how you're reading her. "So, what did you mean about... putting things in perspective, then?"

"Well, I meant that when you stop and think about how _big_ the world is, in size and especially in time, you see just how tiny and meaningless you are. It's like when you look at the stars and imagine all the planets and aliens out there, spinning through the black, living their own billions of lives. If you stop and think about it... what do any of us mean to _the universe?_ Basically nothing! Especially with the lifespans humans and Faunus have. In a hundred years we'll be dead and so will everybody we ever knew, and there will be new people trying to dig up _our_ secrets."

"I... uh... that's... huh." You're chewing on your lip a little, trying to pay attention without getting totally lost in thought. She has a point, is the thing: _a_ _ren't_ you kind of meaningless when you think about it that way? And if _everybody_ is so small... then isn't Jaune Arc even less? You're a speck of dust _to_ specks of dust.

This day really took a weird turn. You... you're not feeling so hot about this, now.

Aradia obviously doesn't think it's depressing at all, though, and you only halfway get why _._ You kinda shrug, although you're not even completely sure what you're shrugging at; it's just a helpless expression of how lost you are.

"Look, think of it this way. If we don't matter at all, and trust me, we _don't_ matter, then we can do _anything we want._ We can _be_ anyone we want. Even if we were hatched into the lowest caste, even if we haven't got a real future, why does that have to keep us down? No one's going to care and no one's going to remember what we did wrong, the responsibilities we couldn't uphold, the roles that got written out for us before we existed at all, so why not live like everything's one big party?"

She reaches out and pokes you in the chest. You somehow manage not to yelp and leap away; you _do_ feel her fingernail poke you pretty sharply, and suddenly you realize she _files her nails into points,_ like she's trying to have claws or something.

"You, Jaune, are completely worthless," Aradia says, "And that means you're free to tell any story you want. You're _free_ and after you're gone and can't even be embarrassed anymore, the future's gonna have _so much fun_ learning about your dumb waste of an existence."

... It seems like her speech is pretty much over. You... feel like maybe she let some weirdly personal stuff slip there even though she was being so vague and you barely know how to respond to that, but you have to say _something_ , so...

"That's all... um. Wow. I'm... not sure what I think about that, but... thanks for... explaining anyway?" It was long and creepy and soul-crushing and she totally wandered off her original topic – _maybe,_ depending on how you look at it – but you do appreciate that she bothered talking to you in the first place.

"No problem," Aradia says, picking her book up again. "I am going to read now! I just got to some stuff about this neat plague that killed a whole city two hundred years ago." Okay, there's the psycho grin back again. That's more like what you expect out of her. And maybe she's right, or at least partly right. Haven't you been living a boring empty life anyway? You're nobody. If you had some kind of destiny, it was just to get pushed around by your sisters and amount to nothing, and really... even if someday you do become _somebody,_ you're still gonna be nothing but a story in the end, so you _should_ just do whatever you want.

It doesn't matter if you're a screw-up, you can _be_ small and useless and still find a way to be happy. Everybody's small, when you look at the whole picture; heroes, kings, whatever.

... You have _no idea_ if you came out of this feeling better or worse, but somehow it feels like you learned something important. For now, though, you're gonna head back to your dorm and check on Pyrrha. She had a weird day, and maybe you can help somehow. It's probably true that _you_ don't matter, but... you don't think you can completely agree that _no one_ does.

It seems to you like some people _could_ actually end up meaning something to the world, could leave a big enough legacy to matter in a hundred years, and if that's true... it wouldn't be some fraud who sneaked his way into school. It'd be someone like Pyrrha Nikos. She probably deserved better than to be stuck with you, even if she doesn't seem upset about it. If life was fair she'd have a partner who knew what he was doing, who _belonged_ here.

But maybe if you work at it hard enough, if that's the story you try to write for yourself... someday you might actually _be_ that partner. _That's_ something worth caring about.

"Hey, Aradia?" You get up, stuff your textbook back in with your other school things.

"Mm?" She's lost in reading about mass death already; she's probably not even paying enough attention to remember whatever you say to her.

"... Why do you want to be friends with me?" This has been kind of eating at you, in the back of your head. She obviously likes messing with you, but you don't think that's the only thing going on. If that was it, she'd have moved on or started pranking you again, not like, rambled a bunch about her weird philosophy.

Aradia blinks after a few seconds go by and she registers that you said stuff, looks up from her book. Her face changes for just a second again, melts back into that softer, realer smile.

"You remind me of a story that deserved a better ending."

 

* * *

RW **B** Y

* * *

 

In all honesty, today is going much better than you had expected. Morning was... _interesting,_ and very productive. You may have managed to twist the situation such that the Schnee heiress will be stuck sleeping underneath a bed that's hanging from _ropes,_ and you're still a bit smug about that; she'll be fine, of course, but the look on her face was priceless.

Classes have been entirely doable, and featured the surreal scene of the aforementioned heiress briefly working with a Faunus without saying anything abhorrent. You're feeling more and more confident on campus, or at least more confident you won't accidentally out yourself somehow. As long as any other Faunus students who happen to become involved in your life are respectful, you should be fine.

The school grounds are _gorgeous._ It's sort of amazing to think you can qualify to be in a place like this through simple merit, that an Academy this prestigious has such comprehensive scholarships and services for the extremely talented. You suppose the pessimistic interpretation is that things in the world have simply become _that dire._ The Academies can afford to accommodate destitute students more than they can afford passing up on any chance at fresh Huntsmen.

Currently you're letting the afternoon drift away in the library, which is _definitely_ going to be your favorite indoor location on campus. Lots of space, a huge selection, hardlight consoles for looking up books... what more could you want? You've holed up in a _very_ nice chair with your back to a wall to get your assigned reading done early. It's not really that you're trying to be the model student, so much as you really, _really_ want an excuse to spend some time in this miniature heaven of a room.

You haven't had too much time to look over course materials yet, but you've sort of skimmed through certain parts of your history textbook, mostly what pertains to topics like the Faunus Rights Revolution, and... well, you can't exactly say it's _perfect,_ but it could be infinitely worse. If anything it goes out of its way to be fair-minded. You're... not terribly inclined to be fair-minded about some things, but detailed neutrality is better than trying to paint over any unpleasant details.

"Hey. Yo. Remnant to Blake." You jerk your head up and out of your book; Yang is looming over you with an amused smile. Damn, you really should have noticed her there. Maybe this place is making you _too_ comfortable.

"Yeah. Sorry, I was kind of absorbed." Honestly you were half-absorbed in the book and half-absorbed in assessing the day so far, but there's no lie there.

"I noticed. I'm headin' back to the dorm since Aradia's too busy being a nerd to go do anything fun with me, but first, I gotta give you a message." She rolls her eyes when she mentions Aradia's nerdiness, apparently not noticing she may as well be applying the same label to you. Not that it's... entirely inaccurate.

"A message? From who?" You can feel your ears twitch toward your skull just the slightest bit beneath your bow as your nerves twang. Hopefully it's not as visible as it feels. It must not be, if no one's noticed the movements _yet._

"So, Jade asked Ruby to ask me to tell you she wanted to talk to you about something? In private, I guess. I don't know what it's about. Shy people, am I right?" Yang smiles somewhat fondly with that last bit. It's sweet that she seems to care about Jade, even if she's her sister's friend more than her own. You suppose that happens, living with someone for a while. Either you wind up hating them, or you start to connect.

"That's... odd. I don't mind, though. Did she... say where she would be?"

"I think she's just chilling outside the library. Anyway, I'm out. I've got some time to waste." She waves, you wave, and she wanders off.

Well then. There shouldn't be anything going on with Jade that's particularly frightening, right? It isn't as if she knows you from somewhere, or suspects something odd of you, or – no, okay, you're over-thinking this already. The only thing she knows about you is the obvious. And that you're a Faunus, obviously, but she shouldn't have any reason to think your motive is hiding that is _sinister_.

She's waiting out by the library's front doors as advertised, looking a bit nervous herself, which is both comforting _and_ worrying.

"... Hi," you say, completely failing to find a way to make this not awkward. "You wanted to talk to me?"

"Uh, yeah! If that's okay?" Jade fidgets with smoothing out the skirt of her outfit. If her pockets weren't full of ammo, you suspect she'd have her hands in them.

"Sure," you say. "You wanted to... go somewhere?" It's silly to feel so much trepidation over this. You're so far away from any situation that could justify more than minimal paranoia.

"Yeah, um, I guess so! Is the edge of campus private enough to count as private, do you think?" Well, at least she's as awkward as you are, or maybe even more.

"Probably. Lead the way, then." You gesture vaguely at the campus in general and when she starts walking, you follow. It takes a little searching to find enough distance from anything to satisfy her, but eventually you stop by a little copse of trees out near the edge of the grounds. Jade sits down with her back against one; she looks exhausted, although you'd guess more emotionally so than physically.

"So... what did you want to talk about that needed privacy?" Still rather apprehensive about this, not because you have any reason to suspect something bad - or even any idea what that would mean - but just because, well... because you're _you_ , probably.

"Oh, um, the privacy is more for you than me." When you raise an eyebrow, she points to your bow. "You didn't want anybody knowing about that, right?"

"Absolutely not. What does that have to do with anything?"

"Well, I guess I needed to talk to another Faunus about something! More specifically you are somebody who also has _ears,_ and obviously my teammate does too, but she kind of hates me and I don't want her to flip out at me again and... anyway. I hope this isn't too weird to ask, but... were you raised by other Faunus?"

Okay, now you can think of a bunch of directions this could go; none of them are actually bad for you, but you have the unfortunate feeling this about to get depressing somehow. Also, last you heard she was worried about her friend/teammate being _angry_ with her, not hating her, and she hadn't even sounded sure of that. Things must have gotten worse awfully quickly.

"Yeah. My mom and dad and... some other people. Why?"

"I wasn't," she says. "I mean, I never actually had parents in the first place. Which is fine! It was just me and my grandpa, and he was definitely human, and then after he died I was alone for a really, really long time." Hmm. You were right about this being depressing, but mostly you just hope her grandfather didn't treat her badly. Humans from _this_ generation are bad enough; skip back _two_ and it tends to be very ugly.

She trails off for a bit. You just sort of let her get lost in her thoughts. It's an uncomfortably relatable experience.

"Sorry, uh, anyway, yeah. The point is... god, I'm going to sound really dumb. So you know my team fought those deer Grimm and Kanaya and I kind of got deafened for half a day? I went to the nurse's office about it, one thing lead to another and... well." She takes a breath, ears slowly flattening out against her head. "I hadn't known my human ears don't do anything? Somehow? The nurse or whoever said that happens sometimes with people who were raised by humans, and I'm still having trouble wrapping my head around it."

... Oh. _God,_ that's horrifying. You did know about this, although you don't think that you've met anyone who lived it before. Being in the White Fang made it impossible not to have at least _heard_ of pretty much every awful thing humans do to Faunus. Maybe you're not being fair with that statement, because it doesn't sound like anyone's fault in her case, but it's such an unsettling thought that it's difficult not be angry on her behalf anyway.

"I'm not even sure why I wanted to talk about this when it's super embarrassing, but I feel _really weird_ about it. I would've complained to Ruby but I just... I don't know. Somehow I felt like it was important that it be a Faunus, and one who's kind of like me."

"Yeah," you say quietly. "That makes sense. From everything I've heard, your friend is a sweet person -"

"She's the _sweetest_ person," Jade interrupts, then looks down awkwardly. "But..."

"But she's still human," you finish, and she nods. "I don't think you're stupid for feeling upset. Learning something like that must be incredibly disorienting."

"It really, really is," she says. "Like, I don't actually care about it by itself, but it is really freaky knowing that I was just... practically _hallucinating_ all of that. I actually did think they worked, and now I can _tell_ they don't, and it's like, _seriously,_ universe? I have to get my perception of reality all shaken up _now?_ I've got so many other dumb problems piled up, and I just started _school,_ and my teammate despises me and my _partner_ thinks I'm useless, was all of that not _enough_ to stress over? When do I get a break?"

"Life isn't fond of giving us breaks," you say. "For what it's worth, I hope things get easier for you soon. And... I don't think Nepeta would think you're _useless._ She's a little bit cutthroat and impatient, but I know she's very stressed lately, too. Though I suppose you'd know her better than I do." Is it terrible of you to be a bit jealous of that? It's only that Nepeta is so _mysterious,_ and whatever secrets she's keeping are probably _mutually_ kept with this girl.

"No, I doubt that. We were not ever actually close at all. I _met_ her a long time ago but until a few weeks back I'd really only talked to her a couple of times. There might be things I know that she's not sure she wants to tell you, but I think you know her much better as a person."

Oh. Hmm. That's actually surprising. You had assumed they _all_ went way back. Nepeta certainly acts that way about the other two.

"Actually," she continues, picking idly at a piece of grass, "I barely know any of my teammates. I hadn't spoken to them in years before we all ended up here. There _are_ people I'm close to, but... I have no idea where they are. My brother's out there somewhere, and I finally talked to an old friend recently but _he's_ pretty much on the other side of the planet. I'm not saying I'm _all alone_ or anything, but..."

You... would honestly say that's pretty close to being 'all alone,' but you don't know that it's your place to disagree with her. The people you know best are all far away too, and you would be lying if you said you don't feel _very_ alone most days, but if she wants to try to be positive about it, then you won't take that away from her.

"Can I ask you something, Jade?" Maybe you shouldn't, and it's such a strange and petty thing to be curious about, but suddenly you have to know.

"Yeah, of course."

"... Have you told Ruby whatever secret it is that you're all keeping?"

Jade is clearly surprised, and for a second or two she seems conflicted about how to answer. Then she smiles: small, sad, and painfully fake.

"No, I haven't. I don't know if I can bring myself to."

"Why not?" Now you're _sure_ you're overstepping some kind of boundary. There's no way this is an appropriate thing to be asking someone, and you can feel your own ears flattening guiltily under your bow.

"Because she'll think I'm crazy," Jade says, "and if that happens I'm pretty sure it will break my heart." She stands up and brushes off her skirt. "Thank you for talking to me, Blake. I think I feel a little better now."

"Any time," you say. "I'm sorry, it was inappropriate of me to ask those things."

"Not really! I'm sorry I can't give you a better answer. Maybe someday I'll be able to trust that Ruby will believe me, and maybe someday she'll trust me enough _to_ believe me. Nepeta obviously likes you a lot, so I'm sure she'll explain herself eventually. Just... if you care about her at all, and I think you do... then please, _please_ trust her when she does, no matter how crazy or stupid it sounds."

You don't know what to say to that. You'd like to say that you will, and you'd like to _think_ that you will, but if this big mystery really is so outrageous that they're both convinced they'll drive people away just by talking about it, then... how can you honestly say it won't happen?

"Speaking of Nepeta, I'm gonna go find her and make sure she hasn't mauled anyone. Have a good night!" Jade gives you one last empty smile and starts the journey back to her dorm.

"You too," you say as she walks away, feeling a bit empty yourself, then watch her shrink into the distance. Maybe you'll stay out here for a little while longer and enjoy the evening, return to your own room when you're feeling better.

You hope she _does_ manage to have a good night. She clearly needs one.

 

* * *

NJ **K** A

* * *

 

You're the first of your team to return to your shared purgatory, and you wish you actually had something to do with yourself to take advantage of the free time. In the absence of motivation to study and anything interesting to pay attention to, you find yourself sprawled dramatically across your sleeping platform, browsing random topics on your scroll.

No new names have lit up on your Scrollian contacts list. You'd take _anyone_ at this point. If you were truly fortunate you'd find Karkat, but of course you don't. Frankly, you'd be happy to talk to Strider, too. You weren't quite so close with him, but he _is_ a good friend.

... Was. He _was_ a good friend. You'll hold him in the past tense until he shows up and gives you reason to do otherwise.

Sighing, you let your scroll flop down on the platform's covers, roll over and wrap your arms around your fluff rectangle. It's painful how quickly you've adjusted to sleeping alone again; you were actually comfortable enough with Rose to share the same platform more often than not, falling asleep and waking up in her arms, knowing that even if everything else in your world was dead and gone and your destiny was ash, at least you were loved.

Now you don't even have that much.

Oh, Rose. What did she _do_ to change things so? Why couldn't she have at least _explained_ herself? It's as though she _wanted_ her sudden exit to hurt you. Perhaps she did; perhaps you deserved it for some past transgression you were unaware of that ate at her over her years spent in this new world. You could search for her, try to find answers, but how could you even look at her again now?

You miss her, you want her, but you also resent her, reject her; after all of this, would it really be possible to forgive her even if she _asked_ you to?

The afternoon sun outside has begun to dim, though it makes little difference to your perception. You leave the light off and let hints of color bleed from the room as the shadows grow deeper; it's all very poetic and sad. It's also getting chilly, so you cover yourself.

Maybe you'll stay this way all night, sullenly tucked away, refusing the world. It would be boring, but what _isn't_ boring these days apart from the infuriating and the painful? No, that's not right; pain itself has become _extremely_ boring.

You wish you had someone to trust, to confide in. More than that, you wish you knew how to properly _want_ someone like that. It's lovely as an abstraction, but any realistic contemplation leaves you bitter and irritable and stubbornly opposed to opening so much as a crack for some other organism to peer into.

The closest thing to any sort of comfort you've felt recently was a few minutes of depressed silence on a rooftop with a stranger you have no interest in speaking to. Aradia's stupid friend's partner. You barely remember her name; you don't even _want_ to remember her name, though you resentfully admit to yourself that you do, since it functions as serviceably Alternian. Pyrrha something-or-other.

She's the one who tried to nudge her way into your business yesterday. You could stay angry about that, and part of you wants to, but... it would be pointlessly obstinate even for you. Unlike a certain _other_ person who needn't be named, she at least respected your wish to be left alone, and didn't even bother you upon finding you again by accident. It's vaguely reassuring, at least, to know that _someone_ on this planet can behave properly.

More importantly, it was just nice for someone else to suffer in silence along with you.

Your ears twitch; footsteps outside the door. Lovely. It's your _'friends,'_ or one of them, at least. After the telltale click of her rectangle slotting in, Nepeta enters, humming out of tune as she makes her way to her platform. She seems to think you're asleep, which works to your benefit considering your reticence to interact with pretty much anyone.

Time passes; you listen to her fiddle with her own scroll, page through a book, scribble something with a cylindrical ink dispenser. Before long you're actually getting a bit tired. Minutes blend into each other, melted and vague.

Then the next person arrives, and you're quite a bit less internally tolerant of _that._ It's Jade, because of course it is; she greets Nepeta and flops loudly onto her rectangle, sighing as if she has something to be exhausted about.

A minute or two passes acceptably before Nepeta does her best to ruin the silence.

"You smell like Blake," she says to Jade, who takes several seconds to register the observation. Jealousy, perhaps? So much for their newfound alliance, then.

"I... was talking to her earlier? Is that a problem?" Ha. Good. You hope they do start bickering. They don't deserve to find any common ground.

(They deserve to, and you know it.)

"Not a _problem,_ purr se," Nepeta says, her sincerity dubious. "I'm just curious what you were glubbing aboat." Surely nothing worth noting, but Nepeta's been so attached to her precious pale-crush that she might actually wring some drama out of it.

(Do you _really_ want to see that happen, Kanaya Maryam?)

"It's... sort of private," Jade says slowly, and you can hear the anxiety in her tone as clear as moonlight. Even she isn't stupid enough to think that answer is going to do anything but inflame the situation further.

(As if Jade is stupid at all.)

"Oh. Well, that's... fin," Nepeta replies, biting off the last word. "So how is she, anywaves?"

Jade sighs. You can hear her scroll thump against her sleeping platform; it must have been in her hands until just now.

"She's okay. Listen, she likes you a _lot,_ Nepeta. You don't have to be jealous. I'm not... _after_ her or anything, and even if I was, I don't think you'd have to worry about it." ... Hm. _That_ you weren't entirely expecting, even though it's probably true. You highly doubt Jade has any investment in Blake, and considering how much time the latter's spent with Nepeta, the rest of Jade's take seems reasonable enough. _Unfortunately._ If you don't get to have anything worthwhile in your life, why should _they_ have the opportunity?

(Because they're your friends.)

"... Do you reely think she does?" The hope in Nepeta's voice is slightly grotesque. Every passing moment only deepens your regret at being trapped here listening to this wretched little scene. You should have stayed out tonight.

"Yeah," Jade says, and you can _hear_ the irritating little smile in her tone. Ugh. "It's not like I can promise anything, but I think you probably have a chance there." Ugh, _ugh._ You hate that she's right, that anyone here might find love someday, that they're even in a position to _want it_ freely without feeling as if shards of glass were tearing at their bloodpushers.

(This isn't you.)

_"_ _Shut up,"_ you whisper, then freeze. Oh. That... was out loud, wasn't it? So much for keeping up your facade of unconsciousness.

"Kanaya," Jade groans. _"Please._ Can you just –"

"Not you," you mumble, because you'll not take credit for any unkindness you didn't actually _intend._ "I was – I think I was dreaming."

"... Sorry," she replies, as though she's done something wrong by taking offense at what she reasonably assumed was your typical wastechute behavior.

"It's fine," you say, and pull your blanket over your head.

You're not actually sure if you _were_ dreaming or if you've just cracked _this much_ _,_ but is there even a meaningful difference? And really, Kanaya? Is this what you've been reduced to? Losing your sense of what it is you're even _thinking,_ losing track of what you feel and what your spite is merely _insisting_ you should feel?

Who _are_ you? Where does the real Kanaya begin and this awful little ball of anger and misery end? Which _is_ real anymore: the old you, replete with wispy hopes and graced with pity, still able to smile? Or is it the _new_ you, hornless, brown-skinned, violated down to the soul, choking on regret and self-pity in every waking moment?

... It's a shame you can't tell Karkat you embarrassed yourself by arguing with yourself out loud. He'd laugh himself sick.


	39. Second Verse (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com with fanart, extra setting info, and updates on chapter progress! Check it out.
> 
> Species-bent Fox to be a Faunus, because he doesn't even have any lines in canon so I feel pretty free to do whatever I want, there. He has a little fox tail, and it's probably adorable.

_it's always quiet on the inside, the noise is so deafening_

_you feel like one in the headlights, tearing you up_

_and now the outline looks so strange_

_beneath the wreckage in this cage_

 

[longwave – the ghosts around you](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTJV8ksvydk)

 

* * *

CF **V** Y

* * *

  **4 th Morning, Spring Semester (Wednesday)**

 

When you wake up, something feels off right away, but it's tough to be sure exactly what it is. You sit up and look around your room, blinking heavily. Wasn't there a poster from that one dumb romance film on the wall across from your bed? Did someone take it down? In its place is a painting of a waterfall flowing into a pond, the surface covered in floating petals.

Everything _smells_ off, too; not completely unfamiliar, but still fundamentally different than it should be. You should be catching hints of wood smoke, burned ozone, wildflowers, ink; instead there's new leather, perfume, oil paints, bitter chocolate.

... Something finally clicks, and oh. Right. Of course. That's what it is.

You flop back down and stare at the ceiling, rubbing your temples; all of a sudden you have a headache. It's so stupid that this keeps on happening to you; it's been _months_ and there are still so many mornings like this, waking up and expecting things that are long, long gone.

At least you can't remember any of your dreams this time. That's... always for the best.

Sighing, you fumble around for your scroll and check the time: seven thirty AM. A little later than you would have liked considering how long it takes you to get your head in gear, but not so late that it's a problem. In another ten minutes you'll probably be able to force yourself into the shower, tune your mind away from all of this and onto your new, uncomfortably busy class schedule.

It's going to be rough, adjusting to taking half again as many classes as the rest of your team, but when your only other option is giving up your dream and going back to life on the streets, the workload doesn't seem so bad.

Fifteen minutes later you make it to the bathroom, yawn, splash some cold water on your face. The circles under your eyes are as dark as ever; you've still got some concealer left to fix that, but you're going to have to buy some more soon. Ugh. It's not in your nature to put more than a small amount of time into that kind of thing; it's so much easier to remember to re-stock on Dust than on make-up. You don't know how Coco keeps track of her own ridiculous array of products.

You nearly fall asleep again in the shower, leaning up against the wall while hot water runs down the fur on your ears and soaks through your hair to the scalp, but your previously mentioned teammate wanders in for her previously mentioned routine, and the sound of her rustling through drawers and putting her face on terrifyingly quickly keeps you conscious.

Besides that, you're sort of afraid of being late. The semester's only just started, it's way too early to risk making any mistakes. As sympathetic as the staff acts, you can't expect them to cut you any more slack than they already have.

... Really, though, you were expecting things to be a lot more disheartening. You half expected the rest of this team to suddenly regret what they did for you, or that you'd crumple the moment you tried to accomplish anything meaningful. But no, it's... it actually feels survivable.

(A lot of things are survivable, unfortunately.)

Part of that is thanks to people you've never even spoken to, strangely enough; no more contact than a wave or a smile from across a classroom or a hallway, but what matters is that they're _here._ You don't think there's ever been an all-Faunus team at Beacon Academy before, and if there has been you can't imagine _when._ Now they're just _here_ _,_ spitting in the face of tradition without even trying.

Do NJKA realize they've instantly become symbols? You know for a fact you're not the only person on campus who feels this way. Fox isn't the sort to talk much about social issues, but even he had a thing or two to say, and more importantly... they have to be an inspiration to all the lonelier Faunus students, the ones _entirely_ surrounded by humans, whether those humans are fair-minded or not.

Their naming ceremony was a bit like the unveiling of a living neon sign that read 'WE BELONG HERE,' and whether it was an accident or not, their existence itself is a political statement addressed to the other academies, the other _Kingdoms._

... It's not like you're _starstruck,_ of course, especially by your juniors, but you would be _so_ happy to at least speak to them once or twice. How often do you get the chance to touch history in the making?

"You alive in there?"

Somehow there are _already_ weird rumors floating around the second years about them; apparently somebody overheard at least one member loudly expressing disappointment that 'humans don't eat their young,' or something else equally stupid. There's no culture on _Remnant_ that does that.

"Hey, Velv! Hello? Helloooo?"

You blink and shake your head, droplets of water splashing against the wall.

"Yes, sorry! Do you need the shower?"

"No. Yatsu does, though." Coco sounds amused by something, although you're not sure what; probably it's got to do with him and not you. Then, more seriously: "... Are you holding up okay?"

... Her concern is sweet, it really is, but this is the last thing you want to be talking to another person about right now. You try not to sigh, because she's being nice, or at least she thinks that she's being nice. It isn't her fault you're like this.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thank you for asking." Another few seconds pass.

"You're so not fine at all. Seriously, you don't have to talk about it, I'm just... I know you have a lot going on with school, and... well..." Please, please just let this go. You're stuck on this enough without people bringing it up over and over. The occasional pitying stare from students you don't know is bad enough.

"I'll _be_ fine. Really. And I'm not the only person who needs looking after."

"... Okay. Take care of yourself today, alright? Don't burn yourself out." You can hear her step out even over the shower's loud hiss, the door creaking shut behind her. _Now_ you sigh, both over her and over yourself.

On the one hand... you quit going to _counseling_ as soon as you'd done as much as the school required you to, why would she think you'd want to talk to _her_ about it? But on the other hand, maybe you're being selfish. Maybe _she's_ the one who wants to talk about it, maybe it would help _her_ and you're just... no, stop it. There's nothing to gain from over-thinking.

Everyone's struggling in their own ways. Just because they think you took a worse hit than they did doesn't mean you want to be pitied or treated like you can't take care of yourself. You don't think you made a mistake when you accepted their offer; it kept you in school without _completely_ having to re-do your first year, and it's better being with them than strangers who probably can't relate at all, but...

God, it's all so _stupid._ How long does it take to feel normal again?

Oh well. You'd better just towel off and hide those circles under your eyes (not that you _have_ to hide them; you just hate looking like the mess that you are). Yatsuhashi takes _forever_ to get ready and you're cutting into his time pretty badly.

Once you've speed-dressed, hair-dryed your ears and put on the concealer with one hand each, and done every other applicable hygiene thing you can fit into a couple of minutes, you take one last look in the mirror. You stand up straighter, try to smile. That much is easy enough.

You try to smile and make it look _real._

That's a lot harder.

 

* * *

 

Aura and Dust's the first class of the day, taught by Professor Peach, whose eyes linger a little when you walk in, soft and concerned. For just a second, you hate her for that, before you make yourself cut it out. You're going to do today perfectly. You're going to lash out at exactly no one, cause exactly no scenes, make exactly nothing awkward. All you have to do is stay focused.

This is the introduction to the class for pretty much every student but you, so it mostly consists of going over a lot of the basics; you think her objective is to get the first-years to really double check whether or not they paid attention in combat school, or for some of them whether or not their self-education was broad enough.

Luckily for you, today's just a lecture. You can let yourself relax a little, not worry about taking notes on literally everything. This is kind of your specialty anyway. If she sprang an unfair test on you right here and now and you're confident you'd do fine, even after a summer's worth of time to get rusty.

It's interesting keeping an eye on the first-years to see who's actually learning things. Most of the class is just bored, but there are some exceptions, especially NJKA, three of whom _definitely_ didn't know most of this stuff; the sheep girl with the scary smile is the only one who doesn't seem to have anything new to think about. Maybe some of their reputation as people from a pretty remote place has truth to it. If they know this little about their own auras, they definitely aren't formally educated. Probably they all got in through testing alone.

Two topics in particular on stand out a little bit as the morning wears on.

First, NJKA's depressed-looking bat has a weird reaction to Professor Peach going over the three basic methods of aura awakening, and she's a mile away for basically the whole rest of the class. You wonder what her story is; she's consistently looked angry, dead inside, or both, and even her own teammates act a bit wary around her.

Second, the professor briefly talks about Semblances and the ways they tend to be found. You're... _happy_ for all the people out there who manifested theirs during training or in other comfortable ways, you guess, but you can't keep from resenting them very slightly. It's just unfair. They get to look back on training with friends, exciting surprises, neat little moments of self-discovery. _Fun_ things. You get to do stupid little breathing exercises, try not to linger on the bile burning at the back of your throat. How could you _not_ be jealous?

All the rest is Dust, and there's nothing you need to pay attention to _there,_ not in this class at least, so you spend what's left of class trying to find a way to feel like you're resting without going too far and falling asleep in your seat.

... That's the first of only three classes today, just one more than a normal schedule, and you're feeling okay. You can do this.

You can definitely do this.

 

* * *

 

Wednesdays your schedule means you're having lunch at the same time as the first years, and that's... sort of demoralizing. It isn't as though you know your team _incredibly_ well, not nearly as well as you ought to – Fox best, probably, after the summer – but at least they're a place to _belong,_ and now there are several days per week you'll be spending this time completely alone. That isn't a _huge_ deal to you, but it's maybe more of a deal than you'd like to admit.

Last year you always had people around to, well, _protect_ you, as embarrassing as that sounds. You've been an easy target for bullying your whole life, shy and a little awkward _and_ a Faunus, and you're not so bad at standing up for other people but you have no idea how to do it for yourself. Beacon had been kind of a partial reprieve, and now even _that's_ been stolen from you.

The cafeteria is buzzing around you while you stand holding your tray, feeling your heartbeat slowly accelerate, scanning the room desperately as if some magical solution will suddenly jump out at you and remove any need to worry.

You're very surprised when one _does._

Over in the corner, the same place as yesterday if you remember right, it looks like NJKA's staked out a table, except that there's only one of them actually sitting at it. Weird, but maybe lucky for you? If they were all there you probably couldn't make yourself say anything, but just intruding on one person's day is easier.

"Um, hello," you say once you've crossed the room, trying and failing to sound (normal) confident. "Do you... mind if I sit here?" The girl with the fluffy white dog ears seems a little surprised by this, but she does smile, which is better than a lot of other possibilities.

"Go ahead! There's plenty of room." She sighs after that second part. You sit down before you can change your mind.

"So... where's your team?" As soon as you ask she slumps in her chair, ears raised irritably. It takes you a tense moment to realize she's not irritated with _you._

"I do not even know at this point. One of them has been all weird and depressed since class this morning – well, she's _always_ weird and depressed, but more than usual? She wandered off somewhere, her partner ended up following her to make sure she was okay – _for once –_ and then _my_ partner went to go spy on them in case anything _'interesting'_ happens." She rolls her eyes and does air quotes when she says 'interesting,' pokes at her food with a fork. "Anyway, um, hi! I'm Jade."

You heard all of their names when their team was first announced, but none of them really stuck; you're pretty sure hers is the only one that isn't too _weird_ to remember. Maybe the effort of trying with the other ones just kind of wiped it from your memory.

"Velvet," you say. "What do you mean by 'interesting'?"

"Oh god." She sets the fork down, rubs at one of her temples. "She's – Nepeta just... has this _thing_ about romance, I guess? She's always tracking people's friendships and I guess looking for signs of them becoming _relationships,_ it's like, her hobby. That and killing things, so I guess she has two hobbies."

"That seems... invasive?" Jade nods wearily.

"That is one word for it! I would also call it _frustrating._ She keeps giving me these _looks_ every time I talk about my best friend, and it's like, really? Is it that hard to imagine two people can like each other without wanting to make it all complicated?"

... Huh. That's an odd way to say it. She could have just said 'without wanting to date' or 'without having crushes' or really anything like that, but her phrasing is a lot more ambiguous. You're not sure if she went out of her way to not actually deny anything, and if she did do that, you're not sure if she _realizes_ she did.

"Did you say her other hobby was _killing things?"_ It took a moment for that to parse, probably because it's such a weird thing to hear. Maybe... maybe she's just really into _regular_ hunting? That could be a non-distressing explanation.

"Yeah, I guess you could just call her a natural Huntress? Even if it wasn't a job, she'd be out there doing it. She gets all twitchy if she hasn't gutted anything for more than, like, two days. Honestly, all three of them are kinda like that a little bit, but Nepeta is on another level." Jade sighs again, goes back to poking at her lunch without actually eating it again. "My weirdest hobby is tinkering around with guns. What about you?"

You're actually caught off guard by her asking you something about _yourself._ It seems obvious that she would do something like that, in retrospect. That's kind of how conversations work.

"I'm an amateur photographer, I suppose." You leave out the fact that it's part of how you fight, because it's not actually about that, for you. Taking pictures is something you've always loved, and working it into your actual career the way you have is just a lucky bonus. "I used to have another thing or two going on, but I haven't been able to focus on anything else very much these days."

That's a half-truth. You do have a harder time caring about things than you used to, but there's a degree to which it's a matter of personal safety. With the political climate the way it is right now, you're afraid of seeming half as passionate about certain very relevant issues as you actually are. There was a time when you were more involved, when you carried around pamphlets and went to protests, but more and more people are splitting off to either carry their activism all the way to criminal activity or falling back to make sure they stay out of jail.

Or maybe you're just making excuses, and the truth is you're too tired to want to fight for your own rights anymore. You aren't sure which is more pathetic.

"That's really neat, though! What kind of stuff do you take pictures of?" You're caught off guard _again._ No one cares about something like photography, it's a boring hobby for boring people, better than _scrapbooking_ but not exactly worth asking about. What really makes it surprising, though, is that she sounds genuinely curious. She doesn't seem like she's just humoring you.

"Well – loads of things, really, but I take a lot of photos of weapons." You'd still rather not explain _why._ It's just that your weapon is all tied up with your Semblance, and you don't want to talk about that, you don't even really like _thinking_ about that when you're not actively practicing with it. There's a reason you mostly get by on martial arts and Dust manipulation. "Other than that, it's just anything that catches my eye, you know?"

You used to sort of want to do journalist work on the side, not to mention trying to document rallies and protests; _someone_ has to be ready to catch evidence of police brutality if it happens, to show proof that not everyone is mixing their activism with violence. If you still went, you'd still be doing it.

"That makes sense! So, I know where _my_ dumb friends are, but... where's _your_ team right now? Shouldn't you be with them? Not that I mind hanging out! I am just curious." Jade suddenly looks almost as nervous as you feel. It's sort of reassuring, seeing proof that you're not the only awkward person alive.

... Unfortunately, this is a question you should have seen coming and _really_ don't want to deal with, because it leads into other questions that you'd do just about anything to avoid answering right now.

"Oh. Er. Well..." You don't want to lie, though. Maybe you can just... try to politely refuse anything else she asks, if she does. Setting boundaries and all that. "I'm actually a second year student, but I sort of have to re-take some of my first year courses. Well, it was that or be held back. So my schedule is a little weird most days, and on some of them my lunch period doesn't really line up with everyone else's."

"Aww. That sounds kinda lonely. You could hang out with us sometimes if you wanted! And also if you can stand my friends? Two of them are okay, just super weird, so if you can kinda ignore Kanaya when she's being a jerk, which is always, it's not so bad."

Jade both looks and sounds strangely hopeful; her ears are pulled back very slightly and she's not quite meeting your eyes. You don't think she's just being nice. She actually really wants you to do it. Maybe it's only that she wants to be around someone who isn't as abrasive as her teammates apparently are, but even if so, it's... nice to be wanted by anyone who you aren't afraid is only keeping around because they feel obligated somehow.

"... Sure," you say, more hesitant than you intended; you have to fix that, make it come out right. "That would be really nice." There, maybe that's better. It's the truth, too. Actually it's sort of _the dream,_ if you think about it, being surrounded by people you can actually know for a fact won't say anything offensive. With your team it's just you and Fox, and while Coco and Yatsuhashi are genuinely lovely people, there's not really any way for you to erase that little grain of doubt and worry. A lifetime of humans will do that, you suppose.

"Cool!" Jade's smile is big and sweet and very earnest. "Feel free to come by whenever."

There's a short, contented kind of quiet after that, while both of you remember the point of lunch is to eat food and start actually doing it. You struggle a little to keep any awkward or goofy expressions off your face; you don't want to look _unhappy,_ it's just that... you're not used to having things to smile about, and you don't trust yourself to come off looking like a normal person anymore.

Hmm. This is Wednesday, isn't it? Yeah. Then next up is... ugh, _s_ _parring._ You are not a big fan of that one. Professor Goodwitch is a bit too strict, and it's a golden opportunity for people to take out their prejudices on each other. Even setting that aside, you're not very good at fighting _people._ You could probably win a lot of match-ups if you burned some of your photos, but you hate using your Semblance when you don't have to, and you'd run through your stock much too quickly.

"Are you any good at sparring?" You kind of hope she says that she isn't. You'll feel a bit less inadequate that way, at least.

"Oh god, is that next? No. There is no way I'm any good at sparring. I can't even fight up close, I just shoot a gun at things! My _aim_ is great but I bet pretty much anyone could just rush in and beat the crap out of me." Jade looks completely dejected thinking about it. Well, _that_ wasn't really what you wanted and now you're a little guilty for making her feel bad, but it _does_ help, in a slightly cruel way. You're only mediocre at close combat, and Dust attacks are great against Grimm but a lot tougher to leverage against humans and Faunus.

"Maybe you should work on that. What's your Semblance? Is it any use for close combat?"

"I haven't unlocked mine yet," she says, and sounds embarrassed about it. "Is that weird? I know I'm kind of behind the curve on a lot of things."

"No, not really. I think at least half the first years here don't know theirs. Maybe yours will help cover some of your weaknesses, when you do find it." You know yours did, sort of. Technically it'll cover just about any possible weakness, if you've taken the right pictures.

"Yeah, I hope so. My partner is already getting frustrated with me for holding her back whenever stuff gets close. She's like a hurricane of murder, it's not even fair." Jade takes one last bite of bacon and then pushes her empty plate off to the side. "I might stick a bayonet on my rifle or something, but that still doesn't mean I'll be any good with it."

"It's a start, though. If you can't do close combat, maybe you should look into ways to keep your enemies out of melee range altogether." She looks pensive when you say that. Well, that's good, isn't it? If she's thinking about it she might come up with something, and then you'll have been useful to someone for once.

"Yeah... where is my _team?_ They're always ditching me! And each other! Bluhh. I guess I'll just meet them in class. Again." Jade scoots out her chair and picks up her bag from the empty chair next to her. You've noticed that students tend to carry their school supplies wherever they _wouldn't_ be carrying their weapons; her lack of a backpack implies that she wears the rifle she talked about on her back.

"Well, I'll... see you later, then?" You try not to sound desperate and can't tell whether or not you succeed.

"Yeah. Oh! Wait! Do you use Scrollian?" She's already getting her scroll out before you have a chance to answer.

"Er – yeah, I do. Do you want my handle?" If she's bothering with _contact information,_ she really is serious about trying to be friends. There's a light, warm feeling in your chest, thinking about that. Meeting people is hard and you barely have the energy to try anymore; it's difficult to believe this was so simple.

"If that's okay! Mine is... lemme see your scroll?" You hand it over and she types her handle in: 'gnosticGunsmoke.' Hmm. The first word is one you're not sure you've heard before. You take hers, a bit awkwardly, and enter your own, kind of hoping she won't have any weird comments about it: 'hollowMemorial.' Obviously it's morbid, you _know_ that, you really don't need any _more_ people poking fun at you.

"Awesome! I will talk to you later, then! Or maybe you will beat me up in class. I hadn't thought about that." Jade laughs nervously. "Anyway, bye!"

"Bye," you say, and she sprints away, which confuses you for a moment before you remember this is her _first_ sparring class, and she's probably afraid she'll be late trying to find it. It's probably not that she's trying to get away from the depressing person.

... Today is... today is going well. It's going really, _really_ well, enough so that it makes you anxious, makes you wonder when the other shoe is going to drop. You try not to focus on that, though. What matters is that you were worried you wouldn't be able to handle the school year at all, and the opposite seems to be true.

There's a smile on your face, and for once you think it might be real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The bit with Kanaya being upset by learning something about how aura can be unlocked will make a lot more sense if you read the first World of Lionhearted post, which talks about that. I recommend checking it out for this reason and also because it's useful info. https://tinyurl.com/y8qmvpw7
> 
> Next time on The Lionhearted: teens savagely beat each other with adult approval and supervision.


	40. Second Verse (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com with fanart, extra setting info, and updates on chapter progress! Check it out.
> 
> Sorry for another late chapter. Been struggling with focusing lately, but I'm getting back into a decent pace as of the last couple of days. This one was also tough to write just because it's so full of Action, which is _really hard_ even if it's a lot of fun.

_i don't wanna fall and say i lost it all_

_'cause baby, there's a part of me that hit the wall_

_leaving pieces of me behind_

_and i feel like i'm breaking inside_

 

[shinedown – breaking inside](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fC3MWIY9ddo)

 

* * *

 **N** JKA

* * *

 

Mew are so, _so_ ready for this class. Hunting is the _best,_ shore, but it'll be a lot of fun to just wreck salmon else who's at least a little bit _skilled,_ testing yourself and your limits. This has all been too _easy_ so far! Maybe you are overestimating these kittens, though. They're sardinely not hardened hunters.

At least _one_ of them should be able to put up a fight. Probably.

It takes a few minutes of looking to find your team and then somewhere to sit, but then efurrybody's circled around a big bloodsport platform, buzzing excitedly while the human adult goes over the rules. 'Goodwitch,' you think.

"All right," she says sharply, thwapping her mounted organism whip into her paw, "Everyone settle down and listen. This class has no particular set curriculum to follow; you will fight, and you will do your best to _learn_ from that experience. There are no age or school year restrictions for opponents, and not every match will necessarily be a simple one on one duel. Before combat, participants will link their scrolls' aura monitors to the school's systems to be tracked in real time; following standardized tournament rules, a fighter has lost when their overall aura falls below fifteen percent, when they concede their defeat, or in rare circumstances if the referee feels intervention is necessary. Continuing to attack a defeated opponent is _strictly_ prohibited and _will_ be punished."

Okay, that's all fine. You're a little disappointed about battles ending when a contestant's oar-a is critical, but it makes sense with the declawed schoolfeeding attitudes people have here. It _does_ conserve fighters who might've died otherwise, although that seems a little silly until you remember that not even reefmotely all the aliens enlist. They probably can't affurd to waste anyone.

"Fighters will be chosen either randomly, by volunteering, or by _me._ It is permitted to challenge other _specific_ students within reason. Typically a student will participate in at most two fights per day and almost never two fights _consecutively,_ though exceptions may occasionally be made. That is all. Now, who among you would like to test yourselves first?"

Hmm. You'll wait a little while. As much as you want to pounce on this, watching the other students nibble at each other will be a good warm-up.

... It's not actually all that interesting, though, or at least it _mostly_ isn't. A lot of students, even the older ones, just don't have a lot going for them. There are also some match-ups that are just _boring_ beclaws one side is obviously at an advantage against whatever weapon the other has. Still, weirdly gentle bloodsports aren't nearly as boring as lectshores.

About an hour in, the adult starts reeling in fighters at random, and you're kind of surprised when the very first person to come up is _you._

"Nepeta Leijon of Team NJKA, versus..." Goodwitch – and you – watch the screen cycle through other faces and names and then beep to a stop. "Pyrrha Nikos of team PRNA. Please make your way to the changing room and prepare for combat."

Huh. Isn't that Aradia's weird friend's partner? She's PRNA's captain, too.

Alright then. This otter be fun.

 

* * *

 

You get set up in the same block on opposite sides of a sliding upright area-splitting rectangle. It's not easea to get good look at her weapons to prepare, but she de-fin-itely has a shield, so the main challenge will probably be getting through her defenses. You are a very slinky kitty and don't expect too much difficulty there.

A minute later, you're out there on the bloodsport platform, waiting for the fight to start so you can purrforate her. Whale, not literally, you're not supposed to kill anymoby here and honestly you don't especially _want_ to when there's no grudge in play, but you're for sure going to perforate her _metafurrically._

She has a weird short sword that's sort of bulky for its length, so it's got to have some other use. Absolutely a defensive fighter, though; she's tall and built enough that she's like a treaded heavy chitin plated obliteration vehicle.

"Combat will commence on the count of three," Goodwitch says. She doesn't have an electronic voice-amplification device, but she doesn't _need_ one. Everyfin she says carries through the whole block.

"Three." You flick your wrists and extend your claws. Pyrrha is doing some kind of meditative respiration roetine.

"Two." A deep quiet settles among the students as they get ready to watch the mauling.

"One." Pyrrha's grip tightens on her sword. You can barely sea it, but it's there. As fur you, _all_ of your muscles tense as you get ready to rush her.

"Fight."

You pounce. She meets you in the center, _waaaay_ faster than you expected, leading with her shield. That's not going to be enough to get in your quay, though, so you dash sideways and move low to rake inward at her torso meats. Fur a second you think you have her, and then all of a sudden her sword flashes out and knocks _both_ your claws away faster than you can swing them and she sinks her knee deep into your gut. The force of the hit knocks the wind out of you and hurls you into a painful backward roll.

So she's got _some skill._ That's ocray. You recofur as quickly as you can, readying yourself to charge again, but she's already on you and you only barely get your claws up to block in time. Pyrrha hooks her blade in at a weird angle and twists your wrist; if your weapons were held in a more normal way you'd already be disarmed. Even so, she takes advantage of it to score three fishous hits to your chest.

Cod, you still haven't had a chance to _breathe,_ you have to get some distance and think of a betta approach, so you try to roll with the momentum of the scratches you just soaked and flip back off the ground as hard as you can, aiming for the far side of the platform.

The instant you land, something flickers bronze in front of you. You deflect most of the impact with your claws crossed in front of you, but you actshoally _slide back_ a few feet in the purrocess. Her shield. She threw her shield so hard it was barely blockable.

Cracks echo in your ears and you blink away your shock, cutting bullets out of the air, and you've lost sight of her – how? Where did she slink off to? Neither side – _above_ you, obviously. She falls like a meteor and you only _just_ manage to sidestep, can't even get the time to _think_ about counter-attacking, and then she's spinning in a circle and the sword is _naut_ a sword anymore, it's a spear kind of like your 2x3dent but with a normal head, and with one brutal slam to the side of your knee she's swept you right off your paws.

You're aboat to roll away when the tip of the spear presses against your throat.

"Yield," Pyrrha says, quietly. You panic – terrified instinct washing rational thought away with a flood of epinephrin – twist your head to the left and try to bat the spear away with your elbow. It sort of works, the point scraping lightly across your neck. You're halfway up again when the flat of the spearhead strikes you in the temple and you fall onto your back again.

Once again she holds you at harpoonpoint, waiting like she thinks you're actshoally going to _give up._ You swipe at her legs and can't seam to reach even though you'd swear she's in range, grab the shaft of the spear with both hands to _haul_ it away, nothing that really even makes sense anymore, but she's strong, she's _so_ strong. Your bloodpusher's pounding hard enough to shatter your bonecage entirely.

Pyrrha pulls back for a second only to kick you in the side and flip you over on your belly. It's hard to tail exactly what happens next, but she's on top of you, crushing you into the ground, twisting your arms painfully behind your back.

 _"_ _Yield,"_ she says again while you struggle, rudderly helpless, fur bristling, losing breath with every second. You keep trying to find a way out of this.

You're slowly reelalizing there isn't one.

A loud mechanical buzz echoes through the block. Wait, what?

"The winner is Pyrrha Nikos," the adult calls out, and there's a roar of applause from the students watching. You'd bassically furgotten they existed. Pyrrha lets go of your arms and fin-ally gets off you; you flip over onto your back, hiss and slash blindly at the space she just left. _"_ _Miss Leijon._ The fight is _over."_

You glance wildly in every direction, shaking, pupeels probably totally dilated; Pyrrha is staring at you, disturbed, and the adult is too, although fur expression is tougher to read. Eventually you look up at the big aura monitors, hissed off that you lost without even getting properly beat down. What you sea is a little hard to accept: your gauge is at about fourteen purrcent. You can't bereef it ran out just from struggling against her hold.

Pyrrha's aura hasn't sunk a single pixel.

When you retract your claws, Pyrrha slowly steps forward, sticking out her hand like she's going to _help you up_ or somefin. There's a fierce flare of pitch inside your bonecage for just a second befur you take a deep breath and the last of your spirit cracks, the rush of epinephren starting to fade. You don't take her stupid paw; you climb clumsily back to your feet on your own. Even if you... urgh, _lost_ – the word is bitter on your tongue and you haven't even said it out loud – you don't need her condensation.

Somebody out in the crowd is glubbing about you being a 'sore loser,' but you can't pick out who; laughter bubbles up from small pockets of gawkers. If you could tell who it was you'd claw their faces off.

You stumble back to the other block to change and try to un-ruffle your fur a bit. There's no point staying dressed for combat; you can't take another voyage this afternoon after losing _that_ much aura, and you're bassically only capable of moving on autopilot at this point.

Cod, this is _awfu_ _l._ She _thrashed_ you, it was like drowning a kitten in a sack. There was never even a _little_ hope for you in that fight, was there? And the worst part is that Pyrrha is another _new student,_ just like you. This is a _big_ pond you've gotten yourself into, isn't it? No, not a pond, more like an _ocean._

Something's been fractured deep inside of you. You're purrty sure it's your pride.

Next thing you know, you're done wandering back to your seat, flopping down and wiggling your tail through the open space at the back. Your teammates are all staring; Aradia just looks fascinated, Jade looks conchcerned, and Kanaya is in fact staring at the terrifying jungle queen who _humiliated_ you instead of furrying aboat her actual _frond._ You probably look as stunned and deflated as you feel. You think you might still be trembling.

"Are you okay?" Jade asks, her ears going flat from anxiety as soon as the words leave her maw. You _shoald_ be annoyed by that, you think, but you just don't have the energy. It's furrankly a good question.

"... I'll _be_ ocray," you mumble, and wonder if it's true.

 

* * *

NJ **K** A

* * *

 

You have just watched your teammate's little shroud of arrogance popped like a latex floatbubble, and you would be lying if you said it wasn't _highly_ satisfying. She's been acting superior to everyone since you got here simply because she's an admittedly talented hunter; it's about time something put her in her place.

More intriguing, however, was her _opponent._ You're mildly resentful of life shoving the same person into the forefront of your thoughts yet again, but how can you not be impressed? It isn't as though you assumed Pyrrha Nikos would be _incompetent,_ but you didn't realize in the slightest that you were looking at a natural-born killer on a scale you haven't seen since your life was ruled by game logic.

Anyway, Nepeta can nurse her own emotional wounds. You have more important matters to focus on, namely that you did _not_ miss the critical allowance to challenge other specific students. Put simply, you have a score to settle, and after spending half an afternoon gearing up for it mentally, it's time for _you_ to show your _own_ puffed-up idiot her place in the world.

Last time you _properly_ fought, violent flirtation excluded, she crushed you, but what really matters about that – far worse than the lingering pain in your scarred shoulder or the blow to your confidence – is what this morning's schoolfeeding revealed regarding methods of unlocking a person's aura.

Her initial victory's side effect of awakening your aura through violent means has quite literally _poisoned your soul._

Why are you so miserable? There are many reasons, and it would be stupid and narrow-minded to pretend that she's responsible for even half of them... but you feel pretty comfortable blaming a _decent percentage_ on the person who forced your soul to prematurely solidify your identity into something _intrinsically broken._

You're not bent on avenging your wounded pride, though that will be a nice bonus. No, you're going to avenge the chunk of _self_ she stole from you.

A match between some bulky human male with a strange mace and a human female who's stolen your idea of compressing her weapon into handbag form comes to a swift end when she simply bludgeons him into submission, and this is it. This is the time to make your move.

"... winner is Coco Adel," Goodwitch says, just so slightly smug; a hint of favoritism perhaps? Not your concern. "Would any of you care to volunteer for the next –"

"I would," you say, attempting to keep your voice clear and even, raising your hand – you've seen aliens using the gesture to accompany interjections, hopefully you're doing it right. "In fact, I'd like to challenge another student." Goodwitch raises a brow.

"Very well," she says. "And who would that be?"

"I challenge Weiss Schnee," you say, failing to keep a small smirk off of your face.

 

* * *

 

What do you know about Schnee's fighting style? She's fast, agile. You don't think she hits hard, but you suspect she hits _often._ Her weapon is primarily intended for thrusting attacks, which is obnoxious but far from a hard counter to your own. She certainly can't take a hit, to judge by the encounter in which she ruined you; the challenge will be in pinning her down long enough to _land_ a hit. After that you'll be able to follow up while she's stunned and finish her off.

The biggest concern you have is the unexpected. That sword is equipped with dust cartridges and you have no idea how she uses them. As long as you're careful, though, you don't think she can pull out any surprises that will be complete game changers.

Your bloodpusher is pounding in your ears. Everything has been utterly _ridiculous_ lately, insult after insult, injury after injury, and you need to _win_ at something for once, you need to finally work out some of this unbearable stress. This is your golden opportunity.

The bloodsport platform is larger than it looks from a distance. Unfortunate; she'll have more room to maneuver, to retreat. You'll manage.

Standing across from her on a _legal_ field of battle is electrifying. The spite painted across her features only stokes your excitement. You can see the certainty of victory in her eyes, and ripping it away will taste sweeter than anything else has in your time on this planet.

"Three." Goodwitch has begun the final countdown. You detach your chainsaw and extend its blade and handles.

"Two." Schnee clicks a mechanism on her sword, rotating the cartridges within it for some unknown purpose.

"One." With a click, the dust engine in your weapon fills your ears with its beautiful roar.

"Fight."

You had assumed, for whatever reason, that her first move would be to close the gap between you, but you were wrong. Instead, she twirls the sword in one hand and gestures oddly with the other, conjuring a ring of six luminous symbols in the air in front of her. They resemble the power she displayed yesterday, but are individually much smaller. The real difference becomes apparent when they begin sequentially firing off bolts of ice-blue light – not exactly slow projectiles, but too slow to have any chance of hitting you.

Stepping aside, you realize almost too late that the bolts are _tracking you,_ and you're forced to knock several aside with your weapon. They impact it harder than you anticipated, bursting into frost on contact, your chainsaw's engine stuttering for a moment before its teeth shatter through the spreading crystals and resume functioning.

Well, then. You were right about her fighting defensively, only off on a few details regarding her methods. Then your priority will be erasing the distance. You zig-zag between bolts, leading them to one side and then darting off to the other, and not a second later you're in her face, going in for the kill – metaphorically, you swear.

Her symbols vanish as she leaps back to avoid your lateral slash, but another, larger one shimmers into being behind her and she ricochets off it like a solid wall, blurring toward you from above, blade outstretched. You twist out of her way and strike at her back when she lands, but she's already gone, propelled at an alarming speed along more symbols lining the floor. As she escapes you she calls up another array, forcing you to waste time ducking and weaving around another barrage of bolts.

This has already become very annoying.

The next time you catch up to her she stalls your attack with a different symbol, black this time; it repels your strike almost magnetically and before you can recover she drives her rapier into your shoulder – _the same one she mutilated._ A lance of pain drives through you even as the actual damage is blocked by your aura. You lash your chainsaw at her with a growl and she flips out of your reach, landing smoothly on her feet.

... Before this fight you were bitter, angry, _resentful,_ but those words are no longer sufficient, not after she's taunted you this way. Now you're _furious._

You charge, focusing on speed, willing yourself to somehow squeeze out just a little bit _more_ to keep up with her, and something _shifts_ inside you. The speed you needed _comes,_ as though the universe is deciding to show you mercy, and you can see her eyes go wide. She actually has to _block_ your next swing, the chainsaw's teeth screaming beautifully against her stupid elegant little stinger. It takes both her hands to hold you off, one on the grip and the other pressed against the flat of the blade.

She visibly grits her teeth, and you're mildly surprised when she manages to redirect you; you'd thought you attacked at full force, but the result was slightly underwhelming. It doesn't matter, though. You won't let the opening to go waste.

Your chainsaw comes around in a perfect arc, and for a moment, just one beautiful fraction of a second, you feel resistance as it collides with her body. She makes a little human pain sound and your pusher soars.

Then she twists away and the swing goes wide. A stab of pain shoots through your shoulder. You'd almost think she managed to hit you somehow, except that's not possible. It's the _wound,_ the one she gave you the day she set you on the road to hell. Are you... _permanently_ injured? You've never actually given the idea any thought before.

Weiss's rapier flicks out and hits you in the stomach twice before you've recovered. The blows don't quite push the air from your lungs or double you over, but they _threaten_ to; she does more damage than you'd expect from that puny thing. You chase her away with another wild slash and it does little more than graze her clothes.

Before you know it she's gone again, hastened to safety by those _damned_ symbols.

A distinct _click_ echoes through the room and a red haze spreads across her blade. You hardly manage to bring your chainsaw up in time to block a wide crescent wave of bright flame; your efforts shield you from the worst of it, but plenty still washes over you, searing your shirt and shoulders. Aura seems to absorb most of the damage, but the sting still makes it through, you can smell singed fabric. You realize, dimly, that you _really_ needed to dodge that attack, and you _really_ didn't.

There's not enough time to finish cursing and blinking away the pain before you're caught in the arm by one of her frost bolts, burned skin going numb almost instantly. The next hits your thigh, cutting off your attempt to dodge anything further. The third you knock away, sluggish from the cold. The fourth takes you in the chest.

You do everything in your power not to fall – bite your tongue, strain your muscles, focus your mind, call up every last bit of strength and rage blazing in your soul.

But you fall anyway.

A grating buzz sounds from somewhere overhead as your chainsaw clatters to the floor.

... There's a roaring in your head far louder than anything your weapon can generate, drowning out what might be someone's voice. You rise to your feet, retrieve the chainsaw, everything oddly muted but the glow of blood pulsing through her body, luminous, hateful, alluring.

More words from the same voice, sharper and louder. You ignore it. The only thing that matters is directly in front of you, bleaching the color from the rest of the world simply by existing to serve as a contrast.

You don't really decide on a course of action so much as you follow the only path that can possibly exist.

Halfway through your mad rush toward your prey, an invisible force crushes you flat to the floor, cracking your head against the hard surface of the plaftorm. Struggling yields no result whatsoever. You're pinned so thoroughly that you can't raise your arms.

Slowly, painfully, the world comes creeping back.

"Are you quite done?" The adult. Goodwitch. You have no reply to offer. After a few more seconds, limp with your face pressed shamefully into the ground, the pressure ceases. You push yourself up onto your knees, as though the action matters. As though anything does. "If you can _behave_ yourself, Miss Maryam, you may continue to observe, but you _will_ see me in my office first thing after class. Is that understood?"

"... Yes," someone says with your voice; it must be your traitorous sense of self-preservation.

 _"_ _Good._ Return to your seat."

You do.

The walk feels ten times longer than it actually is. Jeers ring out from the stands. It's hard to care; no else could possibly instill more shame in you than you already have yourself.

This must be how Nepeta felt just a few minutes ago, only _worse;_ at least she didn't have a grudge to settle. You thought... you thought things would be _different_ this time, that your original loss was only a product of your lack of aura. You thought something was about to go right for you.

How unbelievably stupid. Haven't you learned by now that nothing goes right for you? When are you going to get it through your head? When are you going to stop _hurting_ when life disappoints you, when you disappoint yourself? Where does it end?

... You settle into your seat, apparently having finished your bitter journey without even noticing. The scar on your shoulder still hurts.

"Well, that could've gone better," Aradia says.

All you can do is nod.

 

* * *

 

The next hour goes by in a strange, deeply uncomfortable blur. You're dimly aware that you've made yourself look rather awful in front of quite a few people, but then again, what do you care about reputation? If they think you're awful, they're _right._ And if your teammates are slandered by association, what do you care about that either?

... No, you... something about that doesn't sit right with you. You _do_ care. They can dig their own graves, and you strongly suspect that they _will,_ but you'd rather not have contributed. Haven't you ruined enough things already?

God, you're _tired._ Is that just emotional exhaustion, or have you been sleeping poorly? You always wake up so disoriented, bleary. It's difficult to compare when things took such a sharp turn for the worse, but you don't recall it being _this_ bad in Atlas. Then again, your dreams lately are terrible. That's probably all there is to it.

Now that you think about it, you'd almost swear you're _weaker_ than you should be, too – maybe even less durable. Aura responds to your mental state, so it's possible that's your problem. If not, then either something else you can't guess at is wrong or you're just _worse_ than you had thought. Given your life and behavior in general, the lattermost explanation is probably the correct one.

Your team is unusually quiet even though some mild chatter seems allowed in this class. After what happened to yourself and Nepeta, maybe the others are wisely keeping their comments to themselves. You're more than happy to let them stay that way. If anyone tried to make this worse for you than it already is, you might actually snap and _hurt_ them, and you're in deep enough trouble as it is.

(It's almost comforting to lie to yourself and pretend you have the energy to lash out any further today. What you would actually do is break down crying in front of everyone, and that's so, so much worse.)

After all you've learned about humans, you doubt you'll be _culled_ for your transgression, but you're still absolutely terrified of whatever punishment _does_ lie in wait. You've also gone from a healthy wariness of Goodwitch as an adult to outright fear; humans don't have psionics, you're sure of that, but whatever one wants to call the ability, she crushed you to the floor without even touching you.

If she so decided, she could extinguish you with a thought, and you've earned her ire on your second day here. Wonderful.

Fights and minutes slip by while you sit and brood over all of these things. You're in enough of a trance that you almost miss something _more than a little worth noticing._

"Weiss Schnee of Team RWBY, versus... Pyrrha Nikos of Team PRNA."

Murmurs move through the crowd, most of which you could pick out if you cared to, but all of them are expressing a similar level of interest to yours. Pyrrha seems to have earned herself a reputation for skill already – no surprise, after her absolute victory against Nepeta – and Weiss, damn her, is no slouch herself.

It's not always easy to judge relative strength in battles with participants as versatile as these, but you want to believe Schnee will lose. If you couldn't take her down, maybe someone else can at least do it while you watch.

The two of them face off on the bloodsport platform, attitudes clearly mismatched. Pyrrha is in the same state of eerie calm as before, but Weiss looks distinctly nervous. That alone is already gratifying.

"Three. Two. One. _Fight."_

Weiss opens by immediately bringing up another ring of symbols and firing a stream of frost bolts at Pyrrha, who doesn't dodge them in any conventional way, doesn't even block with her shield. Instead she runs straight ahead, transforming her weapon into its rifle form and almost casually shooting the projectiles out of the air.

As soon as the symbols vanish and the little white monster attempts to evade, Pyrrha cuts her off, hurling her shield not _at_ her target but _ahead_ of her, removing her escape route, and then lunges forward; a startled Weiss tries to block the newly reformed sword with a black symbol only for Pyrrha to duck and sweep at her legs. She narrowly evades by launching herself into the air with another symbol only to cry out in pain when the shield crashes into the small of her back, having somehow rebounded flawlessly from the far wall.

Weiss hasn't even fallen properly when Pyrrha meets her in the air, executing some lightning-fast grapple and slamming her viciously into the floor. The rapier goes flying, skidding almost halfway across the platform. Dazed but still in the fight, Weiss rolls out of the way of a downward slash, shoving Pyrrha off-balance with another black glyph, then tries to run to retrieve her sword.

Pyrrha picks up her shield and throws it again. It clips Weiss in the back of the head this time, knocking her flat on her face, but she gets her hands on the sword, whipping out another wave of flames that Pyrrha actually _disperses_ with what must be an incredibly powerful twirl of her sword in her hands, sparks and tongues of fire breaking and sputtering off to her sides.

She's on Weiss again in the blink of an eye, angular sword arcing in almost faster than you can follow, and when Weiss parries the strike she pivots along with her remaining momentum and kicks her hard in the side, knocking her down all over again.

Weiss struggles to her feet, green light spreading across her rapier, and thrusts it forward to release a fierce, twisting cone of wind – _another_ potent ability you hadn't so much as imagined. Pyrrha, caught off guard at last, isn't particularly harmed as far as you can see, but she's pushed a respectable distance away.

Wasting no time, Weiss plunges her sword into the floor, summoning a thick wall of ice spikes in between herself and her opponent; she's breathing hard, clearly running out of options. You doubt she's bought herself much time, since Pyrrha is already on the move again, but she uses that precious span of seconds to conjure a much larger set of symbols, at least eight this time, fanned out in a half-circle in front of herself.

Pyrrha shatters the ice into countless fragments simply by charging into it with her newly-retrieved shield braced against her shoulder. When she emerges on the other side, however, she's directly in the center of the array of symbols, which Weiss quickly expands into a full circle. All of them, in seemingly random sequence, release both bolts of frost and actual shards of ice, barraging Pyrrha from all sides.

You're torn between a growing despair at just how much more powerful than you your wretched nemesis really is, and complete shock at the way Pyrrha dwarfs even _that._ Weiss is out of breath and battered, but her opponent hasn't suffered a single scratch. How can someone like this qualify as a _new student?_ She's absolutely terrifying. Just watching her is hypnotizing, every motion calculated blindingly quickly, every variable accounted for.

Repositioning her shield, deflecting with her sword, and ducking and weaving with an eerie flawlessness, she strikes down every single one of at least fifteen projectiles before they can inflict damage. She's a juggernaut, a monster, the living equivalent of an Imperial drone; the sort of enemy who can only be survived by never fighting her in the first place.

In the face of this absolute denial of her offensive, Weiss falls to her knees, holding herself upright with the point of her blade. She looks as defeated as you've felt every day of the last few weeks, and it's nothing short of beautiful.

The buzzer sounds. Weiss has depleted her aura below the fifteen percent threshold with her own abilities. Pyrrha is still above ninety percent.

 _"_ _Yessss,"_ you hear Jade whisper, and for once you agree with one of her sentiments. You ought to remember that the two of you share an enemy, and that's better than nothing.

"The winner is Pyrrha Nikos," Goodwitch says, sounding utterly unsurprised. There's applause from the stands around you; someone you don't know asks someone else if they think Pyrrha will give them her autograph, which would typically strike you as silly, but after that display you can sort of empathize.

You're not sure whether you're more interested in staring at your annihilated nemesis or at the bronze war goddess who just unintentionally avenged you, and you're not sure if you feel better for seeing Weiss suffer or worse for seeing the sheer _distance_ you have left to travel if you truly wish to become powerful in any meaningful sense.

Maybe someday... some far off day, assuming you aren't executed or expelled, you might actually be good enough to win your own battles.

It's not the most encouraging thought, but you'll have to take what you can get.


	41. Second Verse (3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obligatory reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com! Check it out for fanart, extra info, and updates on chapter progress.
> 
> One more chapter left in this arc.

_'_ _cause nothing is as bad as you think_

_even when you're pulling at the seams_

_when the lights go out, you still got me_

 

[ _illenium - reverie_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjg3-Wla3PU)

 

* * *

N **J** KA

* * *

  **After Class**

 

Well, that was... a heck of a day! You're really glad you didn't actually have to fight anybody, especially after seeing some of the other students down there. Pyrrha and Weiss are honestly kinda terrifying? It was awesome seeing that jerk get her butt kicked, though. It's just, um, unfortunate that half of your team is practically traumatized and now you all look super bad because two of you are terrible at losing.

Nepeta doesn't seem to be doing too great. She spent pretty much all of class after her fight totally lost in thought and not very happy about it, which isn't too surprising. Mostly you feel bad for her, and you don't actually think she _meant_ to be a sore loser.

Kanaya is _definitely_ not doing well, like, at all, even for herself, which is really saying something. She kind of doesn't have the same excuse that Nepeta might, either. That wasn't any kind of fear response, she just totally lost it. She's probably going to be even more insufferable later, you're not looking forward to _that._

After class ends you split up a bit, because Kanaya has to go be in trouble. You're not actually sure _how much_ trouble, probably not a ton since it's, like, day two of violence school, but it isn't great, and she looks like she thinks she's marching to her execution. Actually, maybe she _does_ think that? Who even knows with her.

Aradia heads off to some unknown place; when you ask her where, she just winks ominously. You really hope the day doesn't end with three quarters of your team on the school's bad side. Things are already plenty awkward here without that!

You're about to go lose Nepeta before she does anything mean for no reason and either try to find Ruby or just go find that one nice cluster of trees and sit there for a while to try to recover from all of this dumb stuff, but she stops you.

"Hey," she says, fidgeting with her sleeve. "Can I talk to mew? Alone?"

... This _cannot_ end well, can it? But she's your partner and you're trying to be a good friend even when it's hard, so...

"Yes?" That ought to be the answer she wanted but it just makes her fidget _harder,_ which seems like a maybe bad thing. You don't even know anymore. "I know a place that's kind of good for talking about stuff."

You lead her across campus to the trees, which you guess you're turning into some kind of official private conversation spot now. It's just really convenient, is all! Besides, you like grass and trees and dirt. It all reminds you of your old island, sometimes.

Once you're there she flops down on the ground, crosses her legs, picks at some grass. You also flop down on the ground. It's pretty nice ground, all things considered.

"So I've been sinking a lot today," she says, not quite meeting your eyes, "Aboat a bunch of diffurrent stuff." Her tail is doing a thing; you don't actually know how cats work, so you're not sure what that means. Maybe you should try to learn more about that. It could come in handy sometime.

"Like... what?" You're not sure how to interact with this situation! She is still acting weird and nervous and that's making _you_ nervous. You really hope this isn't some dumb thing about Blake again, you haven't even _done_ anything.

"Whale, like... like maybe I've been acting weird lately, I guess. No, that's naut... it's just... listen, don't mako this all _weird,_ but..." Nepeta trails off again. It would be really great if she'd get to the point already! She looks down, way down at the ground, rips out a handful of grass. "I wanted to say I've been a tuna bit mean to you recently, and I'm... I'm sorry."

You blink. You are not sure what you were expecting but it was not this.

"Um. Really?" That is a dumb way to respond but honestly you're pretty blindsided!

"Yes, reely. I've been furry stressed out, and I guess it was easea-er to take it out on you than deal with it. I'm just – it's _weird_ here, you know? I keep trying to get used to this place but nofin makes sense, and humans keep getting hissed off at me for existing, and I'm trying to stay afloat and bassically doing it but it's pretty hard! I don't think I'm a very cold purrson, but I'm so on edge all the time." She sighs and scratches her head.

"Yeah, it's not great," you say. "I mean – I don't know what it was like on your planet but I am really not used to people being racist? Or I guess that's not exactly the right word here, but it's pretty much the same thing."

It's dumb but that's the result of living totally separate from society. If you'd grown up in the city like John, it... probably would not have been so easy for you. All you really got was reading gross stuff on message boards and Youtube and a few crappy PMs that one time you tried to use a photo of yourself for an icon. You're not saying you _regret_ mostly escaping that stuff your whole life, because you don't and it would still be worse in general, but maybe you would have at least been prepared for this? It's weird to think about.

"It was probubbly horrible, but I lived in a cave so it didn't matter much. I think Equihiss might have been... not the best about that, but there wasn't much conchtext, it all felt so distant and small. Well, none of it matters now anywaves."

"This is our home now, for maybe a long time. I guess we just have to keep moving forward with things and try not to think about it, except for going out with Aradia to beat people up at night once in a while?" You had not actually told anyone you did that before, but it's kinda liberating. So what if you helped your friend mug a mugger one time! You don't regret it at all, you were broke and he was terrible.

"Yep! And, I said a lot of carp about you being useless and stuff, and I – I guess I manta _little_ of it but... you're not _useless._ You're a little behind us, but I don't think I'm as far _ahead_ as I've been acting like I am. I got _shipwrecked_ today, and I would be lion if I said we weren't _both_ tiny little guppies compared to that girl, so who even cares?"

"... thanks," you say quietly. It feels like something tight in your chest just loosened up a little. Maybe... maybe you don't have to feel as terrible about yourself as you have. You _have_ been useful, haven't you? Not amazingly useful, but you shot some things and you blew up a river. That was worth something.

"I think I've been hard on you beclaws... well, I was _reely_ hoping I'd get partnered with Blake, and then it was you, and I sort of held it against you, which is dumb."

"I really wanted to be paired up with Ruby," you admit. "I'm not _unhappy_ that I got you or anything. But you weren't really my first choice, either. Is it okay to just say that?"

"Pawbviously! It's the truth, so it's waterever. We're here now, we otter just make the best of it." Nepeta shrugs and smiles for the first time in a couple of hours. You smile, too. Today really took a sudden upturn, didn't it? Maybe things will finally be a little easier after this, and you and your partner can actually get along for once. Things with Kanaya are probably going to be even worse but whatever, you can deal with her.

Wow, you might even be able to _hang out_ with Nepeta and have it be fun, like, the way you'd hang out with an actual friend. That would be really nice! You have some stuff in common, it shouldn't be too hard. In fact...

"Hey, Nepeta? Do you want to maybe go hunting sometime? Regular hunting, I mean, not monsters? You could show me some horrible murder tricks!" She grins and her tail starts flipping back and forth.

_"Albacoresalutely,"_ she says.

"I hate everything about the word you just said," you say, and she laughs, and then you laugh, and it feels amazing to be _laughing_ about something for once.

God, you hope this lasts.

 

* * *

~* **G** *~

* * *

 

You are in your office, seated across from a student who is both sullen and visibly frightened, and you are _not_ happy to be here.

It's the _second day of the school year_ and there have already been two incidents! Certainly it could have been _worse,_ but you expect better from your students. Yesterday it was the Winchester boy managing to install himself as an obvious future bully and today it's... _this._

You allowed Miss Leijon's behavior to slide; you were there, you saw the look in her eyes when Miss Nikos had her at spear-point. That wasn't a girl being petulant about her defeat, it was someone on the verge of serious panic. Whatever happened there, it did not merit any actual punishment.

Miss Maryam has absolutely no excuse for what she did, and you don't plan on letting her _make_ any excuses.

"Allow me to begin with this, Miss Maryam. You will _not_ attack another student after a match has ended again. Ever. Is that clear?"

She's still glaring, but she's also having difficulty meeting your eyes. Actually, you're getting the impression that she doesn't know whether or not she is supposed to do so. In any case she's clearly afraid of you, probably because you pinned her to the floor with telekinesis. You can't bring yourself to feel much guilt over that.

"Yes," she says. You narrow your eyes.

"That's 'yes, _professor,'_ Miss Maryam." This is not off to a good start. Then again, nothing about her has had a good start.

"Yes, professor," she says through gritted teeth.

"Would you care to explain your actions?" This will be interesting. You wonder whether she'll defend herself, and if so, what her justification is. Most students have one.

"... Weiss Schnee is the reason I have _this_ _,"_ she says, reaching up to touch the rather nasty knot of scar tissue marring her exposed shoulder, and you feel your eyes widen just a bit. _That_ you were not expecting. "She is also the person who awakened my aura through physical trauma, with the same sword stroke that put me in the hospital. This occurred during one of multiple arguments in which she barraged me with insults about my species."

That... is not something she can prove, but you'd prefer not to doubt a Faunus student's accusation of prejudice. In your experience, it's fellow humans who are more likely to manufacture tales of species-motivated violence, barring gang activity. The fact that she is specifically accusing the heiress to the Schnee Dust Company only lends further credence to the unpleasant idea. Regardless...

"You do realize that whatever your personal history with Miss Schnee, there is no excuse for doing what you did." You do your best to keep your voice level; it's the truth, but speaking it leaves a bitter taste on your tongue.

"No, there isn't," she says quietly, slumping slightly in her seat. "I... if you plan on ordering me to apologize to her, I would prefer to be killed or expelled, but I am well aware that I broke school rules, and will never take such an action again." _Killed?_ Ozpin mentioned that the members of this team had inexplicable and unsettling origins, possibly similar to certain other persons the two of you have crossed paths with, but...

"I don't plan on forcing any apology. I _would_ like to know why you think any action taken at this school could justify your... execution. For the record, it absolutely could not." This is a far stranger conversation than anything you had anticipated.

"Culling offenders is the most obvious and expedient way to keep order," Miss Maryam says, as though it were a completely ordinary and logical concept. "I do understand that this school adheres to less strict standards than I am used to, but it seemed prudent to anticipate the worst." She's meeting your eyes _now,_ which is interesting in a grim way. You let your weight settle back in your chair a bit, try not to sigh too noticeably.

"Miss Maryam, given the circumstances and timing, I am going to allow you to go unpunished for the time being. That said, any further rule-breaking, whether of a violent nature or not, will require me to take action. I suggest you refrain from give me reason to do so."

"Understood," she says, hardly even looking relieved. "May I take my leave, then?"

"You may." As she gathers herself, wincing very slightly and favoring her scarred shoulder when she pushes herself out of her seat, you bite your lip. Nothing about this situation sits right with you. "Miss Maryam?" She finishes slinging her bag over her arm, faces you again. "If you suffer any further discriminatory speech from Miss Schnee, _please_ report it to a professor. Beacon Academy has very little tolerance for bigotry, and I can assure you we will not simply let it slide."

She looks at you incredulously, tenses up; you continue to hold her gaze without budging. Then she slackens a bit, and for the first time her disturbingly hard expression softens to something less angry and more exhausted; you note the bags under her eyes, the heavy way she carries herself.

"... Thank you, professor," she says, and takes her leave.

Once she's gone you lean back into your seat, rub at your temple with your thumb and forefinger; there's a headache coming on and you still have recordings to review and assessments to record, not to mention papers to grade from your elective classes.

... You have the distinct feeling that this is going to be a difficult year.

 

* * *

**P** RNA

* * *

**Evening**

 

Most of the time you're not terribly comfortable with being praised for your performance in battle. There was probably a time when you were, when you _wanted_ it, even, but over the years it's just become a symbol of insincerity. Praise is what you're given by people who see you as entertainment or something to be benefited from. This is not to say that you honestly think _no one_ speaking kindly has good intentions. It's just... complicated.

Because of this, when your teammates shower you with excitement over your wins today, you feel the need to take some time to yourself. You aren't upset with them, but if it goes on for long you're afraid you might be, and that wouldn't benefit anyone.

When you have the freedom to do whatever you want with your time, you generally end up training, ideally with no one else around. You don't really think there's such a thing as being too prepared for life, especially when it comes to combat, and it's a good way to stay busy and keep your mind off your troubles.

Today there are several things bothering you. Your first match, for one. It went well, like most matches tend to, but diverged rather intensely from the script when your opponent began flailing wildly in a desperate attempt to escape you – _escape_ specifically, is the thing. You've dealt with plenty of fighters who don't know how to lose with grace. What you haven't dealt with is fighters who look like they think you're going to literally murder them.

And then you had the distinct discomfort of watching NJKA's Kanaya Maryam melt down and try to attack her opponent post-victory. You... didn't really want to see something like that from a person you've been trying to view in an at all positive light. Justifying how much time you've spent hoping you could help her somehow is difficult, honestly. Maybe it's just that you can relate far too well to self-inflicted loneliness.

Once you've located the first-years' training facility, you find that you are not at all alone here, and that if you planned to escape thinking about her, this is the most absolute failure possible. The room is empty but for one familiar, bitter occupant.

There are so many moments like this in life whose seemingly coincidental nature stretches credulity. Paths _can't_ cross so specifically on just a roll of the dice, can they?

... You could leave, and maybe you _should_ leave, but just like last time you opened a door and found her on the other side, you can't bring yourself to actually do it. Holding back a small sigh, you forge onward toward potential awkwardness.

Leaving her to herself went quite well before; you suppose you'll try it again. She's busy doing what you suppose must be chainsaw forms, although that's... not a concept you're exactly familiar with. You find an open area a respectable distance away to work on smoothing out various methods of transforming Miló mid-attack, a skill you've put countless hours into that seems ready to devour countless more.

You pass a while that way, straining to shave off even the slightest inefficiency, but you keep finding yourself sneaking glances at Kanaya. Honestly, some of it is that you've never thought about there being any sort of technique behind _chainsaw_ combat, but she clearly has it. Is that self-taught, or are there actual schools of... chainsmanship? Either way, she's nothing if not dedicated.

The problem you see isn't one of skill but of _aura,_ which you suspect contributed quite a bit to her loss earlier. While it's a subtle thing from the outside, there's a specific pattern to the speed and strength of her swings that indicates poor aura control. She allots it inefficiently, doesn't seem to have much ability to give it purpose. When was her aura actually unlocked? She fights like someone who's been doing so her whole life, but who's a complete novice on a spiritual level.

Another thing stands out: the occasional half-suppressed gasp of pain and the way she slightly favors one arm makes it clear that the scar on her shoulder isn't just a cosmetic issue. That kind of injury... well, it's not good, but with careful aura usage it can probably be worked around. She's not presently capable of doing that, and it shows. Judging by the scar it's relatively recent, too, and that can't be doing her any favors.

Analyzing other fighters is a habit of yours that's probably responsible for a lot of your success, but you're not very good at _stopping._ It's easy to distract yourself this way without even realizing you're doing it.

Eventually, during some brief lapse of focus, Kanaya finally notices you staring. Oh god. That's _deeply_ embarrassing. Will she be annoyed or outright angry about it? She so clearly has a hair-trigger temper that it wouldn't surprise you if something like this set her off, especially considering she watched you defeat the same opponent who almost flawlessly defeated _her_ this very afternoon.

Instead, she sighs, looks as though she's thinking very hard about something, deactivates her rather loud weapon.

"How did you do it?", she asks, and somehow you didn't expect her to sound... _shy._ "You destroyed her like it was... like it was _nothing,_ and yet you're a first-year student, same as any of us."

"I don't know that I'd say that, exactly," you say, trying to choose your words with care. "I'm... Well, I'm _Pyrrha Nikos."_ That was probably not useful phrasing, but how else do you sum it up? She furrows her brow in response.

"Yes, I remember your name. Barely. You're acting as though I should _know_ it."

"... Don't you?" You're a little stunned; you hadn't really expected to meet _another_ fighter so suddenly who hasn't heard of you. If she were a civilian you could imagine it, but an aspiring Huntress? That's difficult to believe.

"Of course not. If you're implying that you're some kind of celebrity, it's pointless. I may as well have spent my life under a rock as far as you people are all concerned. My original question stands." How exactly are you meant to interpret 'you people?' If she means humans, that still doesn't really explain anything. Even if she comes from somewhere like Menagerie she ought to be somewhat in touch with current events.

"Well... her main strength appears to be her versatility, and I've outfitted myself to counter a wide range of techniques and abilities. Beyond that, I'm more of a technical fighter, so I'm at less of a disadvantage against fast opponents." You don't want to say 'I'm better at this than you are,' even though it's the truth, and none of this is _false_ by any means.

"Yes, clearly, but that's not quite what I... god, what _do_ I mean?" Kanaya rubs at her eyes with her free left hand. Odd that she's holding her weapon in the other, when the way she holds it strongly suggests that she's left-handed. Is she trying to rest her injured shoulder? "Perhaps all I mean is _'why are you so much better than me,'_ but that's stupid and useless. Just... just forget I said anything."

"Are you asking for advice, then?" You swallow, remembering her original reaction to a simple expression of concern. This goes well beyond that. On the other hand, she's the one who brought this up in the first place.

... It also feels very strange to consider _advising_ anyone on anything. When you were younger you didn't mind, but after many years of hopeful fighters looking to take advantage of your skill, staying uninvolved has become a strict policy of yours. The only reason you're considering it at all is that she doesn't know you.

"Am I?" She actually looks surprised. For a moment her expression shifts to something complex that you can't even begin to read, and then she _laughs,_ of all things, short and bitter and sharp. "I suppose I am. How presumptuous of me. I apologize for the indiscretion."

With that she turns away, shoulders slumped even further than before, every bit of her posture conveying exhaustion and defeat.

"... Your aura control needs work," you say, and she stiffens instantly, turning back to look at you again. "I noticed it in your fight and while I've been here, too. You don't seem conscious of where you're gathering it or what intent you're giving it, and you shift it much too slowly. When was it unlocked?"

"About a month ago. Why?" One of Kanaya's fangs digs slightly into her lip. A _month?_ You're tempted to rescind any thoughts about her being an amateur. It's impressive that she can shift it _at all_ after such a short time.

"Because you don't seem used to fighting with it. I think that's your most fundamental issue. Is your shoulder... injured? _Functionally,_ I mean." You resist the urge to fidget nervously with your weapons; you'd rather she not think you're somehow mocking her by stating the obvious. It would be lovely if martial prowess and social skills came hand in hand.

"Unfortunately, yes." She retracts her chainsaw blade, apparently committing to the conversation.

"Better aura control could help with that, too. You could compensate by augmenting the strength and durability in your shoulder and arm muscles. It wouldn't erase the problem, but I think it's a necessary step."

"I see," she says. "I suppose I hadn't realized that was possible. That is... reassuring, actually. I was – I was somewhat concerned that... well." She looks away, scratches the back of her neck. You know exactly what she's talking about, so you don't feel the need to push.

"Other than those fundamentals, all I can think to tell you is that having more options is almost never a bad thing in a fight. Another mode for your weapon, perhaps, or you could try something entirely different, like dust usage." You've never been any good with dust, preferring to rely on bullets and your Semblance for mid to long range combat, but she isn't you; who knows where her strengths lie?

"You've given me a lot to think about," Kanaya says quietly, her head tilting slightly downward with what may or may not be embarrassment. "... Thank you." She looks up again, though it seems a bit deliberate, meets your eyes. "My name is Kanaya Maryam. I suspect you knew that already, but an introduction seemed to be in order."

"I'm glad I could be of use." You smile, trying to keep a slight blush off your cheeks; you're not used to feeling like someone's gratitude is coming from a genuine place. "I'm Pyrrha Nikos, although you knew that already, too."

Kanaya smiles; a small and weak smile, perhaps, but you're confident it's the first time you've ever seen a legitimate expression of happiness on her face. You don't know what on Remnant her story is, but it feels good to imagine your presence brightening it, even if just by a little bit.

You can't be at all certain, yet, but you think you may have just made a friend.


	42. Second Verse (4)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obligatory reminder that the fic has a blog at lionheartedfic.tumblr.com! Check it out for fanart, extra world info, and updates on chapter progress.
> 
> Also, reminder that Fox is a Faunus in this fic, since it's only been mentioned in one other chapter so far.
> 
> This is the last chapter of the arc.

_when the roof caves in and you just can't win_

_you know it'll only get better, it'll only get better_

_when you fall too far, can't get back to the start_

_you know it'll only get better, it'll only get better_

 

[illenium - reverie](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjg3-Wla3PU)

 

* * *

CF **V** Y

* * *

**Night**

 

You spend your evening sitting through your third class, struggling to split your focus between the professor and the strange tangle of emotions the afternoon's sparring matches left you with.

Nothing especially interesting happened with your own team. You didn't end up fighting anyone yourself, which was nice, and Coco won her only match without even having to try. What stuck out for you _and_ quite a few other students was NJKA.

They... did not come out of today with their reputation intact, if they ever had one to begin with. Mostly it's just depressing for you and probably a lot of other Faunus students, seeing terrible sportsmanship basically the moment they had a chance to show it. You're not sure if you're _disappointed_ by them, exactly; it's not that simple, especially because there was a pretty clear difference between their leader's behavior and the chainsaw girl's.

Nepeta Leijon is her name. You wouldn't actually remember it except that you wrote it down, although who knows if you're spelling it right. She did take a swing at Nikos – _Pyrrha Nikos_ of all people – after the fight ended, and was acting strange at the end, but it didn't seem like she was really acting badly on purpose. If anything she seemed _terrified;_ everything was normal until she was more or less pinned down, and then something changed.

You wonder what her life was like to make her react that way, and if she would've taken it better if she had just been smacked around until she ran out of aura. You wonder if people whose lives were easier than yours didn't notice at all.

The other one, though... was there some personal history there? It's possible she just hated losing to a Schnee, it's possible she had a very specific reason to be so upset, and it's also possible she's just an unpleasant person. Maybe it's all three. No matter what the explanation, though, her behavior was inexcusable.

You wonder what Jade's perspective on all of that is. If you can work up the nerve to send her a message and she responds, you'll have to ask her about it.

Eventually class lets out and you all but sleepwalk your way across campus; sunset's come and gone and your depressing thoughts are giving way to the overpowering need to get home and lay down.

Being out and about after dark is a little stressful now that the semester's started and there are so many more people here at all hours. You don't really expect anyone to try to _jump_ you – in the city, sure, but not here – and even if they did you can handle yourself, but somehow that doesn't make it much better.

You weren't always a Huntress, is the thing. Once upon a time you were just another helpless, useless Faunus girl, shoved around and picked on and at the world's mercy more often than not. Even after years and years of training, you can't make yourself feel half as secure as you actually are, not when you're by yourself.

... Nothing bad does happen, though. You let yourself breathe a bit when you've made it indoors again, and seeing your dorm is a much bigger relief than you'd like to admit. In you go, then.

"I'm home," you say, sort of pointlessly. It's not that you feel like you have to, or that somehow they won't notice you, it's just... nice to remind yourself there you _have_ a home, and people there you can come home _to._

Yatsuhashi is sitting on his bed in pajama pants and a t-shirt that's somehow oversized even for him, reading a book; apparently he's not going anywhere tonight. Fox is already laying down, although he's still dressed, just kind of hanging out on top of the covers doing something on his Scroll. Coco doesn't seem to be here.

"Welcome back," Yatsuhashi says, looking up from whatever he was reading. As soon as he sees you his brow furrows with concern. "You seem tired." You smile, sort of, shrug and close the door behind you, wriggle out of your backpack and drop it vaguely in your corner of the room.

"I'm exhausted, but I'm alright. It's just been a long day, you know?"

He nods sympathetically, moves like he's going to return to reading, hesitates, then does it anyway. It's easier to deal with him worrying about you than Coco; he's basically the Team Mom, so he's worried about everyone all the time anyway, and he's more likely to strong-arm people into letting him make them tea than badger them about emotional stuff. Speaking of the other person who tends to fuss, though...

"Where's Coco?" You can't help but wonder. It's getting a bit late.

"Think she's just out 'getting some air,' or whatever she's calling it these days," Fox says, taking one hand off his scroll to make air quotes.

"What – wait, is that someone _new_ already? I thought I remembered some drama with what's-her-name that seemed pretty final, so..." You trail off, wondering how she _finds_ them all. Coco gets... _bored_ very easily, and she isn't particularly prudish about relieving her boredom, but still.

"I suppose so," Yatsuhashi grumbles. "She is moving on unusually fast, even by her standards."

He exchanges a glance with Fox that seems to mean something you aren't picking up on. You feel a bit odd about that, which isn't really fair of you. It's just uncomfortable sometimes, these reminders that everyone else knows each other better than you know them. Maybe you should push for more information here, but... you're a little too tired to focus on other people's lives, honestly. If Coco's going through casual girlfriends practically monthly now, that's not your business unless she wants it to be for some reason.

You kick off your shoes, flop down onto your bed still in your uniform, stretch your arm out and drag your backpack closer, fish out your scroll. Really you ought to get some reading done, but you're not going to retain anything if you try to force yourself when you're this worn out anyway, so you may as well just waste some time.

Actually... now that you're here, maybe you should add someone to your rather short contacts list.

 

hollowMemorial (HM) opened relay with gnosticGunsmoke (GG)

 

HM: Hello!

GG: oh, hi!! you're... velvet, right? what's up?

HM: Not a lot. I just got back to my dorm and I thought I'd say hi.

HM: Unless I'm bothering you?

GG: no no you are not bothering me at all

HM: Okay. How are you doing, then?

GG: that is a good question! i think i'm alright

GG: it's been a rollercoaster of a day though

GG: sparring class was a disaster, i think you were there for that, right?

HM: Er, yeah, I was. What... happened there, exactly, if it's okay to ask?

GG: bluh well a couple things really

GG: i hope you don't already dislike my teammates after that

GG: although if you do i can understand why

HM: I don't really know them, so I'd rather not hold one awkward thing against either of them, honestly.

GG: that is a good attitude to have about people!

GG: nepeta kind of freaked out, i don't think she's used to fights that aren't to the death

GG: i could be wrong, but i don't think i am

GG: she seems fine now, though!

HM: That's good. I wasn't really sure, but it did seem like something weird happened with her. I kept hearing people saying rude things, but... yeah.

HM: What about... sorry, I can't remember her name. Your friend with the chainsaw?

GG: oh god okay no she has a terrible attitude and is a huge jerk

GG: ugh, that's not fair. i am just really frustrated with her lately

GG: her life sucks a lot and she's super depressed but she's been taking it out on everybody so it's hard to stay sympathetic

GG: she only came back to the dorm a little while ago, she was gone for hours after going to professor goodwitch's office

HM: Did she get in trouble? Normally she'd be punished for that, but it's only the second day of the year, so I'm not sure.

GG: well she didn't really say, but she seems LESS messed up than she did before, so i doubt it?

GG: she might have thought she was going to be executed (long story) so maybe she's just relieved she's still alive

GG: anyway i don't know what happened but somehow maybe it was good for her!

GG: ... i'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop, though, it always seems to D:

HM: Well, I hope she's doing better in any case? Depression isn't much fun. She looked so tired, too.

GG: yeah she's totally beat all the time! i'm not sure what that's all about, she doesn't sleep less than anyone else

HM: Keeping a daytime schedule has to be hard on her, right? Maybe she's not used to having to do that for school yet.

HM: I suppose I wouldn't really know, though. I'm not nocturnal myself.

GG: ... oh my god i forgot how bats work

GG: if THAT'S why she's being so cranky i swear i am going to be so annoyed

GG: there's a lot going on with her but i bet that is making it worse! i think i'll try to talk to her about it later

HM: That might be a good idea. I'm not sure if there's anything that can be done to help, but it's worth looking into, or at least offering some sympathy.

HM: Anyway, I'd still like to actually meet your friends! I won't start disliking people just because they have problems.

HM: I would be a terrible hypocrite for that, I think.

GG: yeah, i would be too D:

GG: i wish life could just calm down and be nice to everyone for five minutes

GG: brb

HM: No problem.

GG: okay back sorry about that!

GG: aradia finally showed up and i had to figure out whose blood was on her face :/

GG: this happens so much more often than it should

HM: Wait, is she okay? What happened there?

GG: i don't even know but she said "no one is going to call the police, don't worry about it!"

GG: then she winked at me for a full second

HM: That seems really ominous.

GG: welcome to my life

HM: Are things always this... intense... around you guys?

GG: oh no, usually it's much worse, every day no one gets arrested is a miracle

GG: that's enough about me though, tell me more about you!

HM: Alright, I can do that.

HM: ... I actually have no idea what to say, sorry.

GG: hehe that's ok!

GG: um hmm let's see... you could tell me about your team!

HM: Well, we're Team CFVY. Think of it as "coffee," but dumber, like every team name.

GG: hey at least yours almost makes sense

HM: Haha, yeah, that's true. What actually DOES your team name mean?

HM: I heard how to pronounce it, but I'm not familiar with the word.

GG: oh i actually didn't either i had to look it up

GG: i guess it's some thing in vacuo, these giant ancient drawings of animals and stuff out in the wasteland that you can only really see from the air

GG: people have weird conspiracy theories about it

GG: anyway, your team?

HM: Right, right.

HM: I guess I'll just go by letter! Oh, everyone in our team has a letter that's the start of their first name, like yours.

HM: Normally I wouldn't bother saying that but it seems like PRNA broke that rule twice so...

HM: C is Coco, she's the leader. Human, sort of the Cool Kid. Really into fashion, wears sunglasses all the time... Has probably dated at least a quarter of the girls at this school.

HM: Her family is pretty rich, but she doesn't rub it in anyone's faces. She's actually a really nice person. Her weapon is a handbag that turns into a minigun. I think she used a lot of really expensive dust to get all that metal to fold into itself, but I haven't asked.

GG: haha, some of that's weirdly familiar

GG: who's next?

HM: F is Fox. I guess he's the closest thing I have to a best friend, but it's more complicated than that? He's also a Faunus. A... fox, actually.

GG: that's, um, really kind of uncomfortable!

GG: why would somebody do that to their kid?

HM: The less said about Fox's old "family" the better. He's better off here, anyway.

HM: He looks a little intimidating sometimes but he's pretty laid back. Oh, also, he's... hmm. I guess he's technically blind, but his Semblance mostly covers for that, so he doesn't really consider himself disabled?

HM: I think it still counts, but I'm a little tired of having that conversation with him.

HM: He's the aura specialist and he fights with arm blades that are kind of like tonfa but, well, bladed.

GG: ooh that's pretty neat!

HM: V is me, obviously. Velvet Scarlatina. I think you know plenty about me already.

HM: I'm a dust user, mostly, and I know some martial arts but not enough to really fight anyone skilled up close.

HM: I do have a weapon, but it's sort of a secret. Sorry, I don't want to offend you but I'd rather keep it that way?

GG: no that's fine! i'm not offended :D

GG: so you just use raw dust then?

HM: Yeah.

GG: i haven't ever really tried that, i've done some mixing though. i mostly buy regular bullets but my anti-materiel rifle rounds are my own special ones

GG: maybe i should try using dust some time so i have more options, if i can ever afford to...

HM: It's an expensive style. Especially since it takes a lot of practice to master. Before I started at Beacon I was doing a lot of unpleasant work just to be able to afford to learn.

HM: If you want to try it out, talk to the professors about it. The school helps pay for dust supplies and ammo. They probably won't pay for all of it, but it helps so much.

GG: oh wow i did not even think of that! thanks that's really useful

GG: i had to quit my part-time job so i've been worried about how i'll keep affording ammo and stuff

GG: dust use could be really good if i do end up with a decent supply

HM: I'm glad I could help. Beacon is a really generous academy for the most part. Maybe you have to be when you're training warriors, though.

HM: Anyway, the last one is our Y, Yatsuhashi. He's a total sweetheart, the gentle giant type I suppose. I think he's the tallest person I've ever known. He's the other team human.

HM: He has a sword that's bigger than I am, and he likes painting and tea. It's really cute.

GG: omg that does sound adorable

GG: your team is really cool! i'd like to meet them sometime too

GG: i wonder if kanaya would get along with coco... i think they have some interests in common but lately kanaya doesn't get along with anybody so who knows

GG: i'm glad you're not the only faunus on your team even if they do sound nice though

HM: Me too. It just feels more comfortable, you know?

GG: oh yeah definitely!

GG: my teammates are completely insane but it's such a relief to not have to worry about any of them being awful about my species

GG: there are some humans i trust a lot but you know how it is

HM: Yeah, definitely...

GG: anyway, thanks for telling me about your friends! they do sound like good people

HM: They really are.

HM: I'm getting sleepy, I think I'm going to go pass out. I have four classes tomorrow so I want to be well rested.

GG: okay! i hope you sleep well. it was really really nice talking to you velvet! :D

HM: Yeah, you too! Good night, Jade.

GG: good night!

 

hollowMemorial (HM) closed relay with gnosticGunsmoke (GG)

 

* * *

NJ **K** A

* * *

**Probably After Curfew**

 

It's absurdly late by the time you get back to your dormitory block, the sun having long since set. You feel oddly energetic despite being physically exhausted; perhaps it's just that something ever so slightly nice happened for once in your miserable existence. Hope has been in such short supply, but... you've realized a few things.

You probably can't heal your shoulder, but it's not going to ruin your life.

You're not strong enough, but there are concrete ways to go about improving.

You're living in an environment where some authority figures at least _pretend_ to care.

You aren't so broken that you've entirely forgotten how to make new friends.

... Now you just hope no one on your team is doing anything outrageously stupid in your block the instant you come in, which is a lofty thing to hope for, but not technically impossible.

Inside you find that Jade and Nepeta are sitting on the former's sleeping platform, watching what your ears suggest is a meowbeast video on one of their scrolls. Aradia is on her own platform with a towel beneath her and a dripping wet cloth in her hand, cheerfully scrubbing bloodstains off her road garments; you're not sure why she couldn't just do that in the _ablution_ block, but there are far more offensive things she could be doing with her time, and it's not your platform anyway, so it's really not your problem.

Jade looks up briefly, and seems to attempt to smile at you, though she doesn't succeed. You certainly can't bring yourself to smile _back,_ but the rush of venomous anger you've become used to feeling every time she's around doesn't really surface, either. It's surreal.

All of this is so very surreal.

"What's up, Grumpy Grub?" Aradia, inexplicably waving at you.

"Very little," you lie, rolling your eyes and setting most of your possessions by your sleeping platform, all apart from the rather simple casual unconsciousness regalia you've been wearing to sleep lately. "I see you've engaged in another minor crime. Or is it a serious one?"

"Minor! Well, I mean, define minor? I wouldn't go to jail _forever."_ She goes back to scrubbing, humming an old tune that's entirely bizarre without any clicking or buzzing to accompany it.

"That's probably for the best," you say, and take your unconsciousness regalia with you into the ablution block, shutting the door behind you. It'll be nice to scourge the sweat from your skin after spending so much time swinging your weapon around.

... The reflection in the mirror still isn't yours, and that immediately strips you of some of your vague peace of mind, but you're... almost getting used to the shock, if such a thing is even possible. You don't think you'll ever see Kanaya Maryam in there, but day by day it's just a little less jarring to see that same stranger.

You strip and step into the scourging chamber, carefully avoiding the initial stream of freezing dihydrogen monoxide while you wait for the heat to build. Ugh, you're still shivering by the time steam begins to rise. Maybe someday you'll learn to let the stupid things heat up _before_ exposing yourself to wicked, chilly air. At least it's better than it was in Atlas.

It's strange to find steaming-hot fluid _comforting._ You'd expect to be outright scalded and spend hours or days sore from it, but your body and blood are so much _warmer_ now. What was once lukewarm is now distressingly cold, and what was once overwhelmingly hot feels good on your skin, sinks soothingly into sore muscles. You're doing your best to focus on the novelty of the change and not the loss of self it represents; the effort doesn't quite succeed, but you're getting better at it.

There are a lot of things you have to struggle to keep from the forefront of your mind when your clothes are off, honestly, and this is the least of them. You really and truly don't think you can ever come to terms with the more significant... changes, but distraction _is_ sometimes possible.

Soaking your head and ears would be wonderful right about now, but you can't yet, thanks to those stupid cervidae Grimm, so you focus the stream on your shoulder. That's almost as good.

Eventually you start to feel a little woozy from the building heat and resign yourself to stepping back out into the comparatively frigid air. Hell is having warm blood during the first two minutes after emerging from a scourging station.

Once you've dried off and regained some semblance of warmth, you rustle around in the ameliorative substance wall unit for the bottle of ear drops you've been sharing with Jade. They've been a nuisance to use, but a minor one.

You tilt your head sideways to drip a bit into one ear, wincing as it tickles a cold and slightly effervescent trail much too deep into your skull for comfort. The other is no better. Irritating and a mild discomfort, but if you don't take proper care of your injury you might end up with permanent damage, as Jade so _kindly_ underlined your first night here, and that would... be... a problem...

... Oh.

Realization passes up your spine like an electric shock as a few key concepts fall into place. _Permanent consequences for neglecting injuries in their early stages._

All those weeks ago, you escaped the human hospital to nurse your savaged shoulder on your own, engaging in careless maintenance with tools and bandages bought on a lowblood's budget and applied in rented ablution blocks.

The pain and reduced functionality is _your own fault for rejecting aid._ You let your Alternian pride rule your decision-making and your self-taught ameliorative techniques lead to the wound healing improperly. Weiss Schnee delivered the blow, corrupted your aura, but you're the one who crippled yourself.

... You need to sit down. Preferably on the floor. So you do.

At least thirty full seconds pass before it fully, truly sinks in, and you don't even cover your mouth as you begin to laugh. It starts as a slightly hysterical giggle and progresses to something with far more volume. Tears well up in your eyes, not quite overflowing, but allowing a thin trickle to escape down each cheek.

What a night this is. What an incredible _relief._ You'd just begun to feel a new level of resentment brew inside you, just felt the fear and helplessness rise at the thought of having this debilitation _inflicted_ on you for the duration of your life, but no. It was _your own decision_ that did this. Not some force you couldn't control, not destiny, not even your stupid nemesis. This is not the simple result of a cruel world bent on your misery.

You wouldn't say your bloodpusher _sings,_ per se, but it's producing some form of metaphorical low-key jubilant audio.

After a while of this nonsense you go and dress yourself again, take a moment to examine your scar in the mirror – knotted, deep, and frankly rather beautiful. You've made an effort to wear garments that keep your shoulders uncovered, ensuring the scar is always visible, and your resolve to continue doing so has only been strengthened.

Back in the main block, the lights are already off, though that doesn't mean much to you. Nepeta has retired to her own sleeping platform, lying on her stomach doing something with her scroll while she kicks her feet up and down and her tail sticks up in the air, tip twitching a little. Aradia's already under the covers of her platform, probably trying to pass out early so she can continue invading the minds of strangers. Jade is in a similar position, but has her scroll out as well, casting a dim light across her face. She lowers the it and looks you over, seemingly concerned.

"Are you, um... okay?" Ah, of course. Your little cry-laughing fit was probably audible to _everyone,_ but even if it wasn't, there's no chance that _Jade_ didn't catch it.

"... I... think I might be," you say, almost disturbed by the truth of the statement, and burrow into your platform, resting your cheek on your fluff rectangle. You should be so uncomfortable here, surrounded by other people in an enclosed space, so very far away from anything that has ever _resembled_ a home to you, but... it's... _tolerable,_ somehow, at least in the short term.

Nepeta's put her scroll away and you've gone halfway to sleep when Jade speaks again, her voice quiet enough that neither of your partners will be bothered by it. To you, naturally, each word is perfectly clear.

"Hey, I realized something that I think you would like to know," she says, and you tense a little under the covers. "You've been really tired lately, haven't you?"

"Yes," you mumble, "that is an accurate assessment."

"Well, you're a bat Faunus." She says this as though there's some obvious connection between it and her prior question. "Stuff was kind of backwards on your planet, so were your weird alien bats a diurnal species, or what?"

"No, of course not. Goredrinkers were nocturnal, like almost everything else. Daylight was mostly reserved for the undead." Your brow is furrowed; you feel as though you're missing something very obvious.

"Wow, there is a lot to unpack _there!_ Uh, anyway. Bats are nocturnal on Remnant, just like they were on Earth. That's probably part of why you're sleepy a lot." There's a silence as you parse her statement, and eventually she continues. "I know you've lost a lot of things, but you haven't lost that."

It's warm beneath the thick covers on your sleeping platform; it's far warmer inside your bonecage, all of a sudden. So it... hasn't just been your imagination, then, your desperation to cling to bits of your old self. In Atlas you spent most of your time awake at night, because you had no particular reason _not_ to; you believed that all you were doing was playing a part to make yourself feel better, but it was more than that. It was _real._

You've lost so, _so_ much since you came here, more than you can easily sum up, but... you haven't lost as much as you thought.

It's been _frustrating_ knowing that even as Jade violated your boundaries when you first talked, she sort of saved you in the process, knowing that her comparatively positive outlook has _some_ merit to it. That frustration has not exactly vanished, certainly not in a night, but...

God, you don't know how to _like_ Jade again, you don't know if you _want_ to, but you're so utterly weary with despising her.

"... Thank you," you say, unsure what else to say. Perhaps there isn't anything else, not now, not when your mind is reeling from such an intense emotional rapid rising and falling track-based vehicular excitement installation of a day.

Jade doesn't seem to know what to say either, has no response. That suits you just fine.

Drifting away finally into an _explicably_ tenuous sleep, you are well aware that tomorrow will have its own hardships, that the cloud you're on can't last forever, that destiny's next savage blow must be just around the corner, that things are still basically awful, but...

Right now, life feels as though it might actually be worth living again someday.

That's more than you've had in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next up: "Declaration of Intent"


	43. Interlude: Declaration of Intent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Going to leave off the usual blog reminder because I feel like anyone who got this far in the story _probably noticed the ten thousand links by now._
> 
> Short interlude between arcs, sorry for the length!

_when i was a child, it was always this, a life that i left behind_

_remember the sun, remember the rain_

_they're never gonna touch me again tonight_

 

[_t_ _he birthday massacre –_ _cover my eyes_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkb7tUcfeLg)

 

* * *

CF **V** Y

* * *

  **5 th Evening, Spring Semester (Thursday)**

 

"I am merely suggesting a gentler approach," Yatsuhashi says; you hear him scribbling something in his notebook with his charcoal pencil. "Your aggressive pursuit is probably off-putting to most sober women." Coco sighs. You can't help but follow their conversation even as you're trying to work on some second-year Grimm Studies homework.

"Oh, really. So you know more about women than I do, then?" She's starting to get irritated with him, which is rare. Generally it's impossible for people to feel anything negative toward the big guy. You guess that's not too surprising, though, when she's still in a bad mood from whatever went wrong with her date last night.

"Apparently," he says, and she snorts. "Not everyone approaches life the way you do, Coco. You are a strong personality, and that is one of your greatest strengths, but it can also be a weakness." Uh oh. She's not usually a big fan of being psycho-analyzed, even by someone who knows her pretty well and is almost definitely right.

"Okay, can you _not_ talk like some kind of weird mountain sage, though? Like, do you know how condescending you sound right now?" Yep. There it is. He sighs in response, but it... probably doesn't matter too much what he's planning on saying. You can tell when a person's done listening to reason and is just trying to pick a fight.

Ugh, if this _is_ going to turn into an argument you _really_ don't want to be here for it. You wish you had a better distraction than _homework,_ or maybe just that nobody would screw up your focus around sunset when you're actually at your best.

As if in response to your plea, your scroll buzzes off to your side, upside-down on the covers of your bed.

 

gnosticGunsmoke (GG) opened relay with hollowMemorial (HM)

 

GG: hey, are you out right now, or are you in your dorm?

HM: Er... in my dorm. Hi. Why, what's up?

GG: umm well i was kind of hoping to ask you that! could you do me a favor?

HM: ... Sure?

GG: turn on the news

 

... Something about those four words makes your fur stand on end.

"Hey, guys. I'm turning on the news." Coco and Yatsuhashi trail off; everyone turns to look at you – except Fox, who doesn't actually have to be looking at something to see it. Nobody likes hearing a phrase like this one in that tone of voice. Your leader tosses you the remote control. Well, here goes nothing.

The first thing you see is the ticker at the bottom of the screen: 'Helen Heliotrope reporting from scene of downtown explosion'.

A cold dread twists its way through your stomach.

 _"..._ _on the scene. Firefighters are hard at work keeping the blaze under control_ _and rescuing the injured_ _,_ _while police have already cordoned off the street and are attempting to locate the responsible party. Early estimates suggest at least_ _six dead and_ _fifteen_ _wounded within the building, eleven wounded on the street_ _from their proximity to the blast."_

The point-of-view camera pans up and down a ruined building and devastated street, a massive plume of black smoke rising up into the sky.

"Holy hell," Coco says. You return to your scroll to give yourself an excuse to look away.

 

HM: Oh my god. Was this a bombing or something?

GG: that's kinda what we were wondering

GG: i'm out on the edge of campus hanging out with my team and half of PRNA and we saw the smoke out over the city

GG: tried to just use our scrolls but the signal sucks out by the cliff for some reason so it's all loading super slow

HM: Six dead, twenty six wounded, and that's just what they've confirmed so far.

GG: ..... oh

 

_"At least half of the wounded have been unexpectedly identified as members of the infamous terrorist organization, the White Fang. Those whose injuries are less critical are being taken in for police questioning immediately."_

"Well, that's _pragmatic_ of them, huh?" Fox doesn't sound happy about any of this. You're not either, but... maybe for a different reason. This is all way too familiar. You feel sick – more and more sick by the second.

 _"_ _Experts confirm that the explosion was almost certainly a deliberate act of aggression –"_

 _"_ _A deliberate act of aggression._ Because it's terrorism when it's the White Fang, but not when someone's blowing them up wholesale," Fox says, deadpan.

 _"_ _– carried out by_ _someone with professional demolitions training_ _, primarily due to the relatively small number of injured civilians in the area._ _Wait – I'm getting reports that one of the survivors has begun to tell his story to_ _the_ _officers –"_

The reporter steps away from her camera crew, who return to gratuitous shots of what's left of the building. All of your problems suddenly feel very... small. School frustrations, making friends, Coco's romantic drama... how does _that_ consume your attention when things like this are happening out there in the world?

"Terrible," Yatsuhashi says quietly. You nod, although you're not sure that he's looking at you. His notebook lies forgotten on his bed. Watching this can't be easy for him; he's basically a giant ball of nerves and empathy even on a good day.

It's not easy for you, either, but you have more selfish reasons to be upset.

Meanwhile, the reporter's moved back into frame.

 _"_ _While police are not allowing press to observe directly,_ _this channel has been given permission to share the terrorist's report. Apparently, just before the attack took place,_ _White Fang members watching the entrance to this hideout were approached by a_ _black-suited Faunus with unspecified rodent features, who made the following speech."_

The reporter reads quickly and crisply from a note card she's presumably written out herself, in an attempt to capture the full drama of the situation.

_'A message to all of you mannerless thugs who've been robbing joints under our protection: this is Crew turf, and behavior like this is unacceptable. It's cute what you're doing here, acting like real gangsters, but it stops now. Consider this a declaration of sorts: we will not be tolerating you any longer. Leave Vale to its rightful owners. You'll find very quickly that crossing us is a mistake nobody makes twice.'_

_This_ _Faunus_ _left immediately_ _,_ _just_ _seconds before_ _explosives of unknown make detonated within the hideout._ _So far, the only other detail the shell-shocked White Fang member telling the story can remember is that the presumed Midnight Crew member wore a pin on his lapel in the shape of a diamond._ _Police have found no trace of_ _him_ _anywhere in the_ _area_ _."_

"Can... can I just... turn this off, now?" You're frustrated with how small your voice is, barely more than a squeak.

"Yeah, of course." Coco, unexpectedly. This thing she's been doing lately, acting like it's her responsibility to look after you... it's not really wanted, but in this specific moment you're actually grateful. You shut down the viewscreen and look at your scroll again.

 

HM: I think... I'm a little too upset to keep talking about this. I'm sorry.

GG: it's okay! don't worry about it! we're heading back to our dorm anyway, we can look it up on the CCT when we get there

GG: thanks for helping, i appreciate it

HM: Sure. I'll talk to you later, Jade.

GG: yeah

GG: take care of yourself, ok?

 

hollowMemorial (HM) closed relay with gnosticGunsmoke (GG)

 

"So now we've got a gang war," Fox says. "Like everything _else_ going on in this place wasn't enough." He sighs and flops back onto his bed. You hope he stops here. Fox has always been disillusioned about this Kingdom, and you can't blame him, but sometimes it can grate on your nerves.

"Tensions are running high," Yatsuhashi says. "Perhaps it was inevitable." He's right, of course. From the outside the city might look peaceful, but with the Midnight Crew slowly expanding their influence and criminal activity in the general on the rise, it's been obvious to anyone who was really looking that Vale is – _was_ – a powderkeg.

"It's like... I'm not saying I support _either_ of these groups, but one of them's all-Faunus and the other _mostly_ is. If something's inevitable, why does it have to be _in-fighting?"_

"Fox," you say quietly. "Don't."

"... Sorry," he says, and shuts up.

At least fifteen seconds go by while the dorm continues to try to digest what just happened, and what it might mean for the future. You'd rather not digest it at all. There was already more stress in your life than you could really handle, and now _this..._

"Oh god," Coco says, suddenly. "The Grimm are about to get a lot nastier around here, aren't they? Crap. We're going to lose whole damn villages over this."

"Probably," you mumble, staring at the floor. More homes destroyed. More families lost. All because of petty grudges between criminals. How many more Velvets will there be by the time this month is over? How many Yatsuhashis?

... Not that _you_ really have the right to anything but a guilty conscience.

"Things are about to get a lot worse for Faunus in the city, too," Fox says, because he can't leave well enough alone for two minutes, and you _know_ that, _everyone_ knows that, why does he have to point it out? Can't he just let you spend a couple minutes pretending things don't always get _worse_ for you?

Your scroll buzzes and you choke down a startled gasp. As you're reaching for it, you catch Yatsuhashi glancing at you meaningfully.

 

guardiansMercy (GM)  opened relay with  hollowMemorial (HM)

 

GM: You appear to be very distressed. Would you feel better with company, or do you need to be alone?

HM: i... I guess that... I'd rather b alone. Need to think for a while. thank you for asking me.

GM: Of course. I will arrange a distraction. If there's anything else I can do, please let me know. My scroll will be on.

HM: if there is, I will. you're a good friend.

GM: I do my best.

 

guardiansMercy (GM) closed relay with  hollowMemorial (HM)

 

* * *

 

Ten minutes later, you're alone in your dorm; the others have gone to get food, promising they'll bring something back for you. You're trying to keep yourself steady, taking in long measured breaths of cold, relieving loneliness. Maybe it's not healthy to want to be alone when you feel like this, but it doesn't hurt you as much as the alternative, and honestly, all you want anymore is to hurt less.

Yatsuhashi really is a good friend. Anyone else would have just made the decision for you, if they wanted to help, but he made it a point to check, and he even found a way to do it without embarrassing you. What did you ever do to deserve friends like this?

Haven't you make enough mistakes to disqualify you from knowing kind people?

... It's hard to keep your focus on that, though, because Fox is completely right. The coming months are going to be a very bad time to be a Faunus in Vale. The Midnight Crew haven't taken an action this bold since they were first run out of Vacuo, and something's gone horribly wrong with the Fang lately. They don't back down anymore, they don't care who gets caught in the crossfire as long as it lets them hurt more humans. None of this will do any good when it comes to public human opinion about your species.

It's all so _empty,_ and sometimes you feel like _that's_ the worst part. Money and revenge are the only things that matter. There's no room for justice or progress, or at least that's how it feels these days.

When it comes to surviving in this Kingdom, you have a small advantage: you're a Huntress. There are no cops on Beacon's campus to pull you aside in public under flimsy pretenses, assert their dominance, consider digging up reasons to arrest you that would never take if you were human. Even when you do go to the city, you'll have your ID showing your membership at the Academy to give you a little bit of insulation if you need it.

For the civilian Faunus out there, though life has just gone from hard to outright dangerous. At least your only serious concern is the legal system; if any over-excited humans decide to mess with _you,_ all you have to do is hurt them until they stop. You're one of the lucky few who can, and the number of that specific sort of human is about to skyrocket.

God, you hate this. You don't want to be thinking about _this_ right now, you want to think about meeting new people and learning new tricks with Dust and doing some _good_ in the world for once. Balancing the scales a little bit without having to agonize over every detail.

Eventually you uncurl yourself from your blanket and wander to the closet, almost on autopilot, search through piles of old luggage. There it is, the purse you used to carry with you before you enrolled, all but forgotten for the last year.

In a thick bit of leather dividing two compartments, there is a tiny bulge that can't be seen with the naked eye, only felt, and even then probably only by someone who's looking for it.

If you were a smart person you would have gotten rid of this thing, but... something stopped you from doing that, even though it could see you in prison if the wrong people found it. Maybe you've kept it all this time for moments like this when it can serve as a reminder of old regrets. A cursed token to showcase the karma you still haven't paid off.

You carefully work the insignia out of the leather, hold it in the palm of your hand. It's so small for something that still holds so much power over you, even if only in your mind.

... Then you put it back, swallowing an abrupt surge of paranoia; what if your team comes back sooner than you expect? Do you want to be caught with _this_ thing out? You hide it again as fast as you can while still taking care to do it right, bury the purse under laundry and old backpacks, shut the closet door, and go bury yourself in your bed again.

Realistically... none of this should be your problem, right? You're just... letting old ways of thinking get the better of you. You don't owe _anything_ to _anyone,_ or if you do it's to the people who care about you, not to some abstract concept, and definitely not to... to...

...

You're still curled up under your blanket when they come home, still wallowing in guilt. Coco and Yatsuhashi probably think you're asleep. Fox must know you aren't, just like he knows everything about _any_ physical object near him, but he doesn't say anything about it. Maybe he feels bad for earlier. Maybe not. You can smell pizza, and part of you wants to stop being so stupid and just go eat it while it's hot, let yourself have something comforting.

... Maybe you'll steal a slice when everyone else has gone to bed. It's not like you won't still get to eat.

That's a small price to pay for not having to look anybody in the eye tonight.


End file.
